Ruin

Chapter 1

Lies are the base of corruption. If the world couldn’t lie, this world would be pure. Deception is juggled into people’s minds like popcorn. I have witnessed more then simple lies. I’ve witnessed what happens after too many lies are injected into the earth. Words uttered trying to describe such a phenomenon is not near anything like we have witnessed. I can not imagine what words have enough power to even show such devastation, to even describe what we are going against. What we have to struggle for just to survive. The world should have been destroyed, but man tricked God’s design. They countered his extermination. Now we must suffer the consequences.

We wander drunk trying to think why we even wanted to live anymore. Life itself is a hell hole; it’s the nightmares you dreamt and what to go away. Now it’s here, the nightmare caught up with us. I can’t think anymore, but only dream of what might bring this world to a greater existence. I am apart of the next generation.

Everyone gives me hope like I’m going to make hell into heaven over night. They screwed up and now think they think I can fix their foolish mistakes. Why should I even look in their direction when they gave me nothing except their grief? They gave me nothing.

I deserve to be the leader; I deserve to make them bow down to my feet. They know only that they are idiots. I am the only intelligent being in this rippled universe. No one knows any common sense. I have everything anyone ever needs and they just spit on me like a dog. They try to encourage me but I know they only want me to be their savior. I will make them create the greatest palaces in my honor, I will make them burn and suffer.

They are my slaves, they are my servants, and they are my souls to crush at my will. I may be young, but I have things they don’t have; I have the courage to overcome everyone. My purpose in life is simple, to make the earth something bearable. They want equality; then I’ll make them jump off the cliff and watch them bleed. They want peace; then I will shoot everyone that made this world shit. They want safety; I’ll just make the dogs eat their flesh until they rot in their grave. They don’t deserve anything and I will give them what they really want, nothing.

Family is just a way to not kill each other. Family is just a safety precaution. Family members are the same as anyone who walks on the street. They say they love each other but it is all a lie, just like everything else. I would kill my mother just like I did to some old ladies to get some extra money. But I won’t kill my family; it’s not the right time. Timing is everything, if you don’t do it right, it will bite you back.

I stare out my window, only to see nothing. My mind is angry, all the time. I walk to my chest as every creak in the floor echoes. I slowly open my chest next to my ruffled bed. I pick up my gun, a plasma rifle, my favorite. I go downstairs ignoring my surroundings. Then walk outside to see my disappointed place we call home. I walk across my blackened yard with the green tinted sun staring at me violently. I see a scruffy old man walking on the cracked sidewalk who is wearing a decent coat and pair of pants. It’s time to collect my paycheck.

I come up to the old man and pull out my rifle and point it in his heart. “Now son, I’ll give you anything you want” says the helpless man backing away. I can feel his frightened voice echoing in my head. “Give me everything.” I say forcefully. He reaches into his pocket with his hands shaking insanely. Money spills all over the ground. He looks like he is hiding something, I shoot his leg. His leg starts to disintegrate like acid was poured on his leg. “Are you sure this is this everything?” I say with a firm voice. He starts to cry in agony. Tears pour out of his eyes like a water fall, and then the man says in a soft voice “Please, that’s everything. I gave you everything.” I then see his eyes directly, I lower my weapon. I have never looked directly into my victims’ eyes. It is such a sensitive gloomy look. I feel his pathetic plea for pity. I pick up the money and walk away feeling a knot in my stomach. I see the man laying there in complete pain, feeling such a feeling I can not understand. I feel like this whole thing was not necessary.

I feel regret but I try to hold back. Then I come back to my senses. Why should I give that man pity? No one deserves such compassion, at least, not in this world. I come back to my house, sit down, and start to polish my weapon. My rifle glimmers in the light like a firefly. Its beauty is magnified when I finish polishing it. It sounds ridiculous, but my weapon is the only thing I can trust. My 6 year old sister comes to me and says in an enthusiastic yell, “You want to play a game?” Her smile is resenting, but I can’t stop looking at that happiness. I’m jealous of her lack of knowledge of the world. I look into her for a few seconds then say seriously, “I’m busy.” A frown grows upon her face. “Oh, that’s too bad.” She says with her voice lowered. She walks away dragging her feet.

I saw those man’s eyes looking into my soul, he makes me feel guilty. That stupid man makes me feel grief. There it is again. All these people do is give me grief. All they do is make me feel horrid. I’ve done nothing wrong, only what’s necessary to live. But those teary eyes watch me down and I hate it. A ferocious bell shakes the town with its volume hurting my eye drums. It’s time for school.

I start to walk towards the school where pupils sit down in their desks silent. If they talk or misbehave, they are punished. Rules change, it’s not a note to my mom; it’s a trip to the grave. The leader doesn’t like misbehaving children. I walk by the rich part of the town. They sit in their luxury houses observing their overly sized hologram television. They’re too blind to see me, or anyone except their own blood. I could kill them right here, but that would be breaking the law. They say if you shoot anyone it’s an offense, but not in my part of town. They don’t care if a poor old man dies. But if someone important was murder, there’s a problem.

I walk up to the school. The leader on the hologram says his usually daily rant about children consequences. I ignore his stupidity. I’ve heard about school being a social time back then, but back then was a long time ago. We salute and then recite our salute to the Supreme Being, the leader. We learn pointless math and English. Everyday is the same, no surprises. My teachers are watched every second by hidden cameras. If they don’t teach well, they are executed.

The school day is over and as we leave the leader says, like everyday, “remember children, we are watching… always.” He doesn’t watch me obviously, because I have committed to many crimes to count. My stomach aches of rotten food, I can’t stand it. I walk silently to my crumbled house and open the door. My father is sitting on the chair in the kitchen turned around and giving me a gloomy smile.

I thought he was dead.

“Mom lied.” I say as my temper heats up. We stare at each with total confusion. Why should he even sit here like a pig while he ruined my life! I cried myself to bed everyday until I flooded my bed with agony. This man is a disgrace.

“Now Kyle, you have the right to be angry. I should’ve told you sooner. I was just so busy.” Says my father is a monotone voice. The war should have killed him; it should have eliminated him like everyone else. I stare at his eyes furiously. It feels as though my body is on fire. I can’t think. “You lied.” I say angrily. I pick up my rifle. “I learned a lot while you were gone; I learned how to be brave, and not afraid of anything.” I polish my rifle several times. “I learned… everyone is the enemy, that everyone on this god forsaken earth is a threat, including you.” I point the rifle at my frightened father and there it is again. There are those annoying eyes looking straight into my heart. I can’t pull the trigger. My heartbeat is pounding savagely. I start crying.

I drop the rifle. Every hit as my weapon attacks the floor is a pounding drum. My father opens his arms and walks toward me to give me a hug. I want to back away, but I don’t. I let his musky smell overpower me. I am his slave. I push him away and run to my room.

I hear his cry of forgiveness. His deep voice is slapping me in the face. I can’t take it. I scavenge through my belongings, and pick up a knife. I violently purge into my delicate skin, red gushy blood is exposed. Blood trickles down my arm and stains the rotten wood. I feel as though my soul is pulling out of me. Energy is being lost. I will be forever gone. I will not be myself. What am I? Have I ever been myself? Was I just some child like the rest? No I’m stronger. I can handle it. My tears mix in with the blood. Pain doesn’t help me. I go on my bed weeping.

“That man shouldn’t have come here!” I scream to myself. “He should have died… he should of.” I plead to myself. I see my reflection in the mirror. I am crying and tears are soaking up my ripped shirt. I am pathetic.

I can’t be like this. I’m stronger, I am the strongest. I can’t help but feel alone. I’m so alone in my own solitude. I want someone to hold me, but I can’t let myself be weak. I can’t let myself be a disgrace. I take my knife and throw it at my mirror forcefully, I’m destroying myself. The mirror explodes and it shatters everything. I step on the glass, my feet are bleeding. I don’t care. I stand there completely exhausted, but I don’t want to sleep. I can’t drift off feeling so empty. Eventually I fall into my bed. I go to sleep and don’t want to wake up.

I wake up and the sun is attacking me. I go to the kitchen and I see my father. He doesn’t say anything and I just ignore him. After I get something to eat we are face to face, my dead father and I. “I saw you have some scars on your arm, you trip or something?” says my clueless father. I don’t respond. I stare out the cracked window and see as always nothing.

All I see is ruin.