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Fiction » Romance » There Is No Such Word As Loved! font: B s : A A A . width: full 3/4 1/2
Author: Sapphire Night
Fiction Rated: T - English - General/Drama - Reviews: 1 - Published: 11-07-09 - Updated: 11-08-09 - Complete - id:2738830

“Jake, please stop yelling...” Pleaded Kay, desperately trying to calm herself. Her blond hair was pulled back into a ponytail, her bangs covering her forehead and side-swept to the right. Her crystal blue eyes were tearing up, her heart was breaking and her cheeks were turning red. It was hard for her to breathe, even though she was in her spaghetti strapped, white nightgown.

“No! I am tired of this! I am tired of you, this life, even Sk-” Jake, Kay’s best friend from when she was in elementary school and now her husband, bellowed. His short, blond hair spiked up slightly, his blue eyes enraged, no love in them left. His pale skin started to turn red as he yelled, and he was still in his work suit.

“Don’t get him into this!” Kay yelled. She was happy Skye, her son she had with Jake, was at a friend’s house while this happened.

“Well, he is in this! I am tired of you always being with Chris and working with him. I am tired of Skyeler being so unlike me! I never wanted to be with you anyway! I only got with you because I pitied you! I hate your goddamn existence!”

“Jake... I’m sorry.... You feel this way... I’m sorry... I caused you so much sadness... Just... If I am setting you back, you can leave.” Kay whispered, trying hard not to cry.

“Good! You’ll get the papers tomorrow. You’ll have to pack your stuff and Skye’s tonight and find some other place to live. This is my house, my rules. That means: you leave.” snarled Jake, leaving Kay all to herself.

Kay allowed her tears to fall now, since she was alone. However, she didn’t let that slow her down. She needed to pack up her things, then Skye’s.

Kay started packing her clothes and trinkets, which she had little of, into her suitcases and bags. Then, she packed all of Skye’s belongings into suitcases and even some left over boxes from when they moved. Soon enough, all of Skye’s and Kay’s belongings were packed and Kay started bringing them outside to the car, tears still shedding from her eyes.

Kay returned into the house before she left for good, looking at Jake, who was sitting in the living room, on the beige, leather couch, watching a soccer game on the television.

“Goodbye Jake. I hope we can at least stay friends.” Stated Kay, hoping this wouldn’t turn out how her parents were when she was younger. Always fighting, Jake obtaining soul-custody and ruining both Skye’s and her own life through guilt trips and manipulation.

“We’re never seeing each other again. I don’t want to have anything to do with you or Skyeler. Goodbye and good riddance.” snapped Jake, taking a swig from his beer.

“As you wish...” Whispered Kay in response.

Kay left and went into the car, pulling out of the driveway and driving a bit up the road, stopping at the side of the road, unsure of where to go. She didn’t know who to call, what to do, where to go, how to tell Skye; she was lost.

Suddenly, her phone started ringing and she picked it up, pressing the green button and placing the phone piece to her ear. “Hello...?” She answered, solemnly.

“Kay? It’s Chris! I was wondering if you and Jake would like to come over for a movie tonight.” Chris stated, sounding absolutely happy.

More tears started to escape Kay’s eyes and she felt her lower lip quiver a bit. “I... Jake... Jake and I... we’re... separated...” Kay whispered, not even sure if Chris had heard.

There was slight silence and then Chris spoke once again, worried. “Oh God, Kay! What happened?”

“He... He didn’t really love me... He... Kicked me out of the house... Along with Skye...” Kay barely explained.

“Are you serious?! That bastard! Damn it! You’re coming over, right now! You’re staying with Jess and I.” demanded Chris, fury growing inside of him.

“Thank you... I’ll see you soon...”

“Anything for you Kay! See you.”

Kay hung up the phone and placed it on the seat beside her. She started up her Red Dodge truck and shifted into driving gear. She started driving towards Chris and Jess’ house. She really needed someone she could talk to, someone who knew her; she needed Chris.

As Kay drove down the road, she started to remember when her and Chris were together, how he was her first, how they used to kiss, how they promised when they were sixteen that they would open a doctor clinic together. She remembered how they promised they would keep the love that they had for each other (more than friends love) dormant for a while so they get variety, how he said he would want to marry her. Then, she remembered how he met Jess in grade eleven, asked her out in grade twelve and how they all went to McGill university in Montreal together, how Chris asked her how he should purpose to Jess properly, how he said he found the one for him. She remembered how her heart broke immediately then, how she wished she could just crawl into a dark hole and never come out. She remembered how when she was younger, she was with three other guys, four including someone in university, and the majority were all jackasses. She remembered how she had to deal with Jess bragging over Chris purposing to her, how she was the maid of honor, how she had to help with everything, how she was watching the only man she ever loved and trusted more than anyone, even her mother, walk down the isle with someone she has never really liked and never really liked her.

Once all these memories were flashed by, Kay had reached Chris and Jess’ house. She was absolutely terrified to go in. She was anxious. She is the one who knew Chris the best. She is the one he tells everything to. She is his escape. She truly loves him, unconditionally, for him, not his title.

Chris is a Count in Italy. Jess knows that, and knew before Chris purposed to her. Kay heard from Alex, and old friend from high school and through university, that Jess told her that she was only marrying Chris for his title and money. However, since Kay never got good evidence, she never told Chris. Besides, she knew he wouldn’t believe her and she knew that he loves Jess more than her, she also knew that Chris would just try to lecture Kay if she told him about this, thinking this was all something to say to try and get him back with her.

Kay sighed heavily. She wasn’t ready to go and face Chris or Jess (especially) with her extra-emotional mood right now, especially since she just got all of those suppressed past events running through her head again, causing her depressed mood to worsen to great extents.

As she walked up the driveway, slowly, she remembered how she was depressed that Chris was marrying Jess. She was absolutely hurt, devastated, and crushed. Then, a week later, Jake, and old friend she had when she was in elementary school that was here best friend of all, came into her life again. They had parted ways as teenagers, now he was back. He asked her to marry her after they dated for only one month. Then, they married three months later. They lived seven, long, happy-ish years together. However, in the last two, Jake had been very distant, always at work, and always on business trips. Kay knew what was happening, she knew this from her own father, who did the same and had sons with another woman, no longer loving her mother, her or her sister. She knew the signs, she was only waiting for a night like this to occur. However, she wasn’t as ready as she thought she would be.

She made it to the door and she knocked on the clean, white door. Her stomach filled with butterflies and her heart was racing and sinking at the same time, tears still trickling down her cheek.

The door opened to reveal Chris. His black, short, slightly curly hair was messy, but not the usual messy from sexual activities, the messy you see when someone has been pacing or sitting, constantly running their hands through their hair in worry. His crystal, moss-like colored eyes were full of worry and empathy, his pale skin was free of all blemishes, his face was cleanly shaven and he was in a pair of grey sweats and a white t-shirt with white socks.

“Kay...” He whispered, feeling completely helpless, since he knew he couldn’t reverse what happened, he couldn’t take away her pain, he didn’t know how to save her this time.

Kay weakly smiled; however, it didn’t reach her eyes. Chris motioned her to come in, and she walked into the house, completely numb in her chest. Chris brought her into the living room and sat her down on the blue, swede couch.

Kay looked around. She didn’t see Jess anywhere. Where is she? “Chris...?” whispered Kay, still not back in the real world completely.

“Yes?” replied Chris, leaning back and placing his arm around Kay.

“Where is Jess?”

Chris knew she would ask this question. He knew she was always on-edge around here when Jess was home. He was only happy that Jess had to leave on an emergency tonight with her work. “She had to leave on an emergency trip tonight for a week. She knows you’ll be here, and she’s fine with it. You don’t have to be on-edge tonight.”

Kay snapped her head over to Chris, shocked that he knew. How does he know her so well still? She only wished he knew what Alex and her knew about Jess. “I’m not on-edge when I’m here.” Kay lied, trying to defend herself.

“Kay, don’t try to lie to me. I know you, and you suck at lying. Now, tell me everything that happened tonight.” Chris said, pulling Kay into his embrace, cuddling with her.

Kay smelt him and her chest filled with momentary bliss. She missed the times when her and him were together as teenagers, that made her heart break and then she started sobbing and explained it all: how Jake never really loved her and only felt pity for her, how she has only had jackasses for boyfriends ever since they broke up, except for Michael; but, he sadly had to move to Holland with family because they needed him, and he keeps in touch with her. He has three children, a wife and is as happy as can be, unlike her. Kay explained about how Jake doesn’t like Skye, how he never liked this life, about the business trips and late hours at work, about how she was kicked out and he never wants to see her again. She explained that she didn’t know anything anymore, like when she was in high school, how she felt lost and had no clue how to tell Skye this depressing and traumatic news. She explained it all, and she felt good explaining it all to Chris, since he understands everything she says, since he cares for her and loves her for who she is, he knows her better than herself and always believed in her. Now, she lost him, to someone who doesn’t even truly love him.

“I’m so sorry Kay.” Said Chris once Kay was finished explaining.

Chris felt bad, he knew that if he had realized how stupid he was for not marrying Kay, like he realized a year after marrying Jess, than none of this would have happened. He realized, if he had just stayed with her, purposed to her, married her, he would be fully happy, he would be with the only person he ever wanted, and Kay would feel the same, and she would have never had to experience something that her mother went through.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Asked Chris, still holding Kay tightly as her sobs turned to small gasps.

“Uh... Sure... After I call Greg’s house. I need to tell Elise that I’ll pick up Skye tomorrow and not to drop him off.” Responded Kay, getting up and walking to the kitchen to get the phone and call Skye’s friend’s house.

She dialed the number and placed the phone to her ear, waiting for someone to pick up. Finally, the click sounded and Greg’s mother, Elise, picked up. “Hello?” Elise spoke into the phone in her calm and soft voice.

“Hello, this is Kay, Skye’s mother, calling.” Kay responded into the phone, feeling anxious about the next day, hoping it will take a while for it to come around, and feeling nervous about having to explain this to Skye.

“Oh! Hello Kay. How are you?”

“I’m not too bad. Yourself?”

“I’m great! Do you need to speak to Skye?”

“In a minute. I would just like to tell you, first, that I need to pick Skye up tomorrow, and that you don’t need to drop him off.”

“Are you sure? We can handle dropping him off.”

“I know; however, him and I need to talk tomorrow, mother and son.”

“Okay. Would you like to say goodnight to him? He’s about to go to bed and is looking excitedly at the phone.” Stated Elise, making Kay laugh a bit.

“Yes, please.”

“Okay, just hold on one second.”

Kay stayed quiet and waited until a laughing, little, six-year-old boy took the phone from Elise. “Mommy!” Skye almost screamed into the phone.

“Hello sweetie. Are you having fun at Greg’s?”

“Yes! We played soccer, and went to the park, and saw the movie Ghost Busters!”

Kay laughed a bit. “Wow, you had a full day. Are you tired now?”

Kay heard a yawn on the other end. “Yeah...”

“Well, then I will say goodnight, sweet dreams, I love you, and I will see you tomorrow.”

“I love you too mommy! ‘Night!” Skye said, hanging up the phone afterward.

Kay placed the phone back on the stand and looked at it for a moment. How will she tell her darling little boy that his father doesn’t want to see him anymore, and that he is gone forever?

Kay shook her head and told herself that she didn’t have to worry about that for a while. Right now, she has to be with Chris, forget about bad things for a while, forget the real world, and watch a movie with him.

Kay walked into the living room and saw the main menu to Scary Movie 4. She giggled slightly at that, since it was so stupid that she would probably laugh like a maniac, until she cried and her sides hurt. She walked to the couch and Chris pulled her into his embrace again, cuddling with her like they used to, he was even caressing her forearm like she liked when they were teenagers. The movie started and all through the movie, Chris and Kay laughed like maniacs, they teared up and both of their sides hurt by the end of the movie. Then, Chris helped Kay grab her necessities and Skye’s, bringing them into the house and into the guest room. They made the bed and Chris left Kay so both of them could get ready for bed.

Kay washed up and was already in her spaghetti strapped nightgown when Chris was done. Chris looked deeply into Kay’s eyes, he felt the love for her drown his heart again, pushing Jess fully out of the picture. However, he couldn’t do anything with her, he’s married.

Kay saw the love grow in Chris’ eyes and she felt the love for Chris grow in her own, her love for him building over the scars that she had obtained from this divorce. She felt it overwhelm her. She wanted to touch her lips to his once more. She wanted to hold him again, and for him to hold her; yet, she knew he was married and that couldn’t happen. But, why did he look at her the same way she was looking at him?

“Well... Goodnight. I love you.” Chris said, pulling Kay in for a hug.

Kay hugged back and they kissed each other on the cheeks. “Goodnight. I love you too.”

Chris left and Kay went off to bed, still pondering about what that look in Chris’ eyes meant.

Kay woke up to her cellphone alarm. She looked at the time and realized she would have to get Skye in two hours. She got out of bed and took a shower, then got dressed in a pair of jeans, a black t-shirt and a red sweater. Then, she made a quick bowl of cereal and looked at the note on the fridge from Chris. It read:

I am at work. I will be home by four-thirty. I wish you luck on telling Skye this news. I know you will be able to find the right words to say and comfort him easily, you always knew how to do that with me.

Love: Chris.

Kay sighed and put everything away, walking upstairs and washing up. When she was done, she went downstairs again and turned on the television, flipping to the weather network to watch something mindless for twenty minutes while she thought of how to tell Skye of this horrific news.

Kay finally thought of a fairly good idea and grabbed her jacket and an extra key to Chris and Jess’ house that was placed by her jacket on purpose. Kay slipped on her running shoes and took her car keys, walking out of the house and locking it. She walked down the driveway and slipped into her car that still had most of her and Skye’s belongings inside of it. She started the truck and it roared to life. She backed out of the driveway and was on her way to get Skye.

She made it to the house easily and walked up to the door, knocking quickly and she was brought inside. She talked with Elise about the boys and their schooling for a short while until Skye came down with his red backpack, Greg trailing behind him.

“Mommy!” Yelled Skye, running to his mom and jumping into her arms after dropping his bag by her feet.

“Hey sweetie. How did you sleep?” Kay asked as she held her pride and joy in her arms.

“Great! Can we go home now?”

Kay let go of Skye and Skye took his bag, slipping on his shoes and looking slightly tired. “C’mon, let’s go. And, don’t forget to say thank you.”

“Thank you!” Repeated Skye to Elise.

“No problem darling. I hope you come over again.”

Skye nodded and waved goodbye to Greg. Kay and Skye left and went into the car. That’s when it all started. Kay turned on the car, backed out of the driveway, and started driving back to Chris and Jess’ house.

“Mommy, why is this stuff in the car?” Asked Skye, absolutely confused.

“Sweetheart, you need to know something. Something very important. It is also very sad.” Kay stated, worried of how Skye will react to the news.

“What is it mommy?”

“Skye... Your father... He...” Kay had the words in her head, but they couldn’t come off of her tongue.

“Is he dead?”

“Oh, no, no, no sweetheart, no. Your father’s not dead. He’s just... no longer with us. He’s with... Someone else.”

Skye had a tear trickle down his cheek and Kay stopped the car on the side of the road. She unbuckled her seatbelt and took Skye into her arms.

“Shh, shh. It’s okay sweetheart. We’re living with our friends, Chris and Jess.”

“I don’t like Jess.” Commented Skye, no longer crying. “Daddy never wanted to be home.”

“Oh, Skye... It’ll be okay.”

“Can we go back to Chris’ house?”

“Yes we can. And, Jess isn’t home. She’s away on business.”

“Okay...” Skye responded.

“Will you be okay?” Kay asked, worried Skye would be depressed.

“Yes. Dad never really wanted us. I never really liked him. He was too angry.”

Kay laughed a bit at this, Skye joining in. “I love you sweetheart.”

“I love you too mommy.”

Kay smiled and kissed Skye on the forehead. She moved back to the driver’s seat, buckled her seatbelt and started the car again, driving towards Chris’ house again. Once they made it, Kay showed Skye around and showed him where they would sleep. Skye asked if her and him could have a nap and she did, finally feeling at rest for once in fifteen years of her life.

A few weeks flew by fast. Chris, Skye and Kay always having a blast and Kay and Chris’ relationship growing stronger, and more forbidden. Jess grew angrier and kept leaving for business trips.

Now, it had been three weeks since Kay and Skye had been living with Chris and Jess. And, Kay was finally starting to find some good homes for sale; luckily, Skye and her were not even depressed about the divorce, and it was final for the past two and a half weeks.

It was a Saturday afternoon and Kay had a box of her old notebooks in her room. She was trying to find a notebook with an old story in it to get some information for her new one. She was at her computer, the door open, and Skye walked in after having some lunch, carrying an egg-salad sandwich and a glass of milk for Kay.

Kay looked over and quickly got up, taking the not balanced well, full dishes from her six-year-old son’s hands. She placed them by her laptop and Skye grabbed an orange notebook from the box of notebooks Kay brought in.

“What’s in here mommy?” Asked Skye, curiously.

Kay sat down, cross-legged on the floor and leaned her back against the bed. She took the notebook from Skye and put Skye on her lap. She opened the notebook and turned the pages to show Skye the written work from when Kay was a teenager.

“What is this language?” Skye asked, bewildered.

“It is three languages. This is the notebook I used when I was learning how to speak French, Italian and Finnish.”

“Finnish?”

Kay giggled. “Finnish. It is from a country called Finland. Half of our family is form there.” Kay explained.

“Really?”

“Yes. Would you like to learn it?”

“Yeah!”

Chris was standing at the doorway now; however, Kay and Skye never noticed. Kay was starting to speak simple words to Skye in Finnish, like she would when he was a baby. Chris remembered her doing that when he would go over. Skye was now repeating back those words easily, far easier than someone who had never heard the language in their life.

Chris was looking at how great Kay was with Skye and decided there and then that he needed to talk to Jess alone. Chris left the doorway and walked out of the house, finding Jess in the backyard, sitting on a bench, off in a trance of happiness. It seemed Jess was always happiest when by herself. Chris knew why, he knew all along; yet, he was always hoping that it would change. However, it never has. Her business trips have been increasing as well in the last two years, just like Jake’s.

Chris walked over to the bench and sat down beside Jess. “Jess, I really need to talk to you.”

Jess looked over at Chris seriously. “What is it?”

“I think, I don’t think this is working out for us.”

“What do you mean?”

“Jess, I think we should divorce.”

Jess looked at Chris with the largest smile on her face, then she frowned and she got angry. “What?!”

“I know you’re only with me for my title and money. I’m not stupid or ignorant. Don’t try to lie and say you love me. Besides, I know you’re on business trips that aren’t with your business.”

Jess calmed down and smiled widely. “That’s right, but I found someone richer than you. So, I don’t even need you now. I’ll send you the papers tomorrow. I’ll move my stuff out tonight. I hope you have fun with Kay. She’s always been a failure.” Jess stated, getting up and walking towards the house.

Chris grabbed her arm and looked her in the eyes, fury shinning bright in them. “Don’t you dare speak that way about her. She has succeeded in more than you ever can. You’re just a rotten, low, gold-digger.” Chris snarled.

Jess pulled her arm away and walked into the house, Chris following behind her. Chris walked upstairs and Jess packed all her things by four in the evening. She was gone, heading off with Jake, since she told Chris before she left, right in front of Skye and Kay. Skye didn’t care, somehow, and Kay was fine with it, happy that Jake is now happy.

After Jess left, Chris turned to Kay and smiled. “Skye, do you mind leaving your mother and I alone for a moment?”

Skye nodded and walked out of the living room. Chris sat Kay down on the couch and then kneeled on the ground. Kay’s breath caught in her throat and she looked at Chris, not believing any of this is happening. Chris pulled a small, blue, velvet box from his pocket and opened it to reveal and beautiful Diamond ring with a small Peridot and another small Diamond on each side.

Chris remembered buying the ring when he was twenty-two, during a rough patch of Jess and his relationship during university. He went to the best jewelers in Italy and especially made the ring a decent size with a small Peridot on one side to represent the birthstone for Kay’s birth month, and a small Diamond on the other side to represent his own birthstone for his birth month. He was thinking of using it for Jess when he was going to purpose to her, since the rough patch ended when Chris returned from Italy and they were still together; but, when he looked at the ring again, he could only see Kay’s face, shinning with happiness from Chris popping the question to her. So, Chris went to a Canadian jeweler and bought a new, pure Canadian Diamond ring for Jess, since he could see her happiness from that ring, not the one he bought for Kay.

Chris looked in Kay’s shocked, and shinning-with-happiness, blue eyes. “Kay, will you marry me?” Asked Chris, smiling widely.

Kay was speechless. She started nodding her head rapidly and Chris smiled even wider. Kay started tearing out of happiness and Chris placed a new ring on her bare finger since three weeks ago. Chris kissed Kay passionately, and when her lips and his were together, it reminded Kay of when they were first together.

“Ew!” Kay and Chris heard Skye say.

They separated their lips and looked at Skye, who was peaking around the corner into the living room, a look of grotesque feelings expressed on his face. Kay and Chris laughed, then, Chris went over and grabbed Skye, holding him upside down, bringing him over to the couch. Then, Chris started tickling Skye until Skye was crying with laughing tears, screaming mercy.

Kay and Chris got married five months afterward, in Italy, with all of Chris’ and Kay’s family present. Kay was soon pregnant afterward and she gave birth to a daughter, named Elizabeth. After, Kay and Chris moved to a closer home to their work, where they could start new. Now, they are living together, happy to be together, and finally at peace and in pure bliss in their life, forever, till death do they not part.



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