|I Grant You A Weesh!
Author: AlwaysForTheGay PM
A ridiculous little drabble about a Student just trying to study. Allergy warning: may contain men in dresses, strange accents, waffles, star wands, and steak knives.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor - Words: 1,163 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12-15-09 - Status: Complete - id: 2752872
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
I Grant You A Weesh!
Once upon a time, there was a young student studying for their finals. They realised that they, in fact, had NO CHANCE of passing because they kept getting distracted by phoning their friends, and going online to talk to strangers; really, anything except studying. So finally they gave up the pretense of studying and decided to trust their voluminous amounts of intelligence instead.
"Of course I won't fail too badly," said the student, and merrily went on their way to .
Five hours later, the student rubbed their eyes and looked at the clock. It was four in the morning! And they had two final exams in the morning...
The student panicked, but no sooner did the first tear fall than did the student hear a strange crash from the kitchen. The student wasn't very much in the mood for an intruder, what with imminent failure and lack of sleep, so they grabbed a steak knife from their computer desk, where they'd left it after eating dinner. The student grasped the knife with a shaking hand and made their way to the kitchen, where they heard strange crashes and bangs and swearing.
This is the worst thief ever, thought the student. They slowly peeked around the corner of the doorframe and their mouth dropped open at the sight they beheld.
Flitting about the small kitchen nervously was a short man in an even shorter pink dress. He had large fairy wings on his back, tied on around his front with pink gauzy material. He had a wand in hand and was searching the cabinets and shelves furiously for something. The student had no idea what the crazy man might possibly find, since they'd run out of any good food two days before.
The student decided it was time to intervene in this insane situation. They stepped into the kitchen, never lowering the knife, and cleared their throat. "Hello. Would you like to explain what you're doing in my kitchen...dressed as a fairy?"
The man whipped around, bright pink hair flying around wildly. His tiara miraculously stayed perched precariously on his head. "Oh my!" he screeched. "You're awake! Good morning, princess, how are you darling?"
"Um, fabulous. You didn't answer the question. I'd hate to have to go nuts and stab you, but you know how things are."
The man's eyes widened momentarily. He settled down and patted his skirts, and fixed his hair and tiara. He drew himself up. "I am your fairy god-mother!"
The student snorted. "You're a man."
"Minor details. Do you have any waffles?"
"No! Get out of my apartment!" cried the student.
The man ignored the student and flicked his star-topped wand at the counter. A plate of waffles appeared. The man helped himself to one before turning to face the stunned student.
The student rubbed their eyes and shook their head. Obviously, the lack of sleep was getting to them. They were either dreaming, or had gone completely bonkers studying futilely. Coming to these conclusions, the student decided it would be acceptable to sit down at the kitchen table with the strange man.
"So, why are you in my kitchen?" asked the student of the man, who was still standing.
"I come to grant you a weesh!" exclaimed the man in a bubbly tone, and grinned hugely.
The student looked at the man dubiously. "Mm-hm."
"No, really! Anything!" insisted the man, bouncing on the balls of his heels. "Weesh for anything! A passing grade, a million dollars?"
"How about you getting the hell out of my house?"
"Anything except that~!" sang the man and giggled. "C'mon, be serious! I grant you a weesh!"
"I don't want a weesh--er, wish, I mean. Just get out." The student wasn't prejudiced or anything, but the man in the dress was making them uncomfortable.
The man sighed melodramatically. "Oh, really, darling. Is it so hard, really? Fine, I grant you a weesh anyway." The man leaned over on one foot and rapped the student on the head with his wand a few times. The student tried to make a grab for the man, but he slipped out of the student's grasp; he was as slick as an eel. He giggled and, as it could only be described, frolicked his way out of the house.
The student shook their head, disbelieving of the situation. Of course, it was a dream. Just a very strange one. The student glanced at the digital clock on the microwave: this nonsense had taken up over an hour! The sun would be up soon! The student got up, kicked the chair in anger, and made their way back to their bedroom. The student shut their laptop and collapsed on their futon, too tired to even pull the sheets up over themselves.
* * *
A month later, the student was in class and the teacher was calling people up to get their exam grades. When finally the student's name was called, the student went up nervously. While taking their exams, the student wasn't aware of what was happening. The student had been terribly exhausted and didn't even seem to be reading the questions, just filling in answers blindly. And now was the moment the student had been anticipating and dreading. The grades.
The teacher smiled broadly when the student approached the desk. The teacher Leaned forward and showed her teeth. "You did a marvelous job, I'm impressed! You really must have studied hard, huh?"
The student blushed, remembering the hours in front of the computer. "Um...yeah..."
"Oh silly me, the grade! Well, you got a 105% dear. Not quite sure how, but there you have it."
The student was shocked. Surely there was a mistake but...well, who were they to argue? The student grinned, thanked the teacher, and sat back down at their desk.
After class, the student exited the room and began walking home. A rustling to the side of the student, coming from a bush, startled them, and they jumped aside quickly. A man in all pink burst from the bush brandishing a wand. He latched onto the student in a tight hug.
"Princess, princess!" cried the man. "I'm here! I grant you a weesh!!"
The student sighed.
A/N: Well, that was different. I wrote this because I was on Mystery Google and my mission was to send someone an interesting story. I e-mailed them, asking, "What kind of story?" and they kindly explained anything to entertain them while they studied for exams. And I'm so tired, that this is what came out. I pulled that fairy godmother from Devdasi on and her wonderful comic, Shounen-ai Fairytales, so don't give me credit for that. I mean, sure, I played around with him a bit, but that is her character. ;)
Maggie, 15 December 2009