So this is what it feels like to lose it all

Then hit rock bottom, hands shaking

Mind racing, Staring blankly at the wall

Wanting to give up praying this is all a dream

Yet knowing it's real by the pain it's causing

And so it begins

Dancing the dance with unsteady balance

Finally, the tears break like a rushing stream

In the silence of the night

Watching the headlights dance on the walls

Realizing that life isn't all it's cracked up to be

It's a game of Russian Roulette

When the barrel revolves the chances are taken

Only to be hit by fate when the trigger is pulled

The only thing killed is happiness

The lights go out and the insomnia commences

Announcing the rough times ahead

When your pillow becomes your best friend

Taking in tears and providing comfort

Not knowing what's ahead

For the first time, being scared of the future

It's an internal struggle not wanting to think

And yet the thoughts creep up and overtake

Pressing reset on the rush of negativity

Where the optimist becomes the pessimist

In the chapter of life, learning how to cry

At night without letting out a sound