|You're Such A Loser
Author: BabyDollAndGiantFreaK PM
Ridiculously Happy'Popping The Question'entry So it's okay Darren is an idiot.Cappie is impatient.Darren is ice and Cappie is fire.But hey,according to Darren he belongs with her, he'd even jump through hoops for her..just kidding those hoops are on fireRated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Humor - Words: 3,356 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Updated: 06-12-10 - Published: 06-01-10 - Status: Complete - id: 2813054
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
So this is for the Ridiculously Happy OneShot's, 'Poppingthe Question' contestttt. If you want to join or know more about it go to Annoyace's page or ridiculouslyhappy(dot)webs(dot)com
I like this one(: I actually like just came up with this off the top of my head cause over thinking it wasn't working after a few attempts.
I don't know if I should do that. I only know one thing for sure and that's this, I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't in anyway be doing this.
But I spent most of this school year planning this out. This is the most effort I've ever put into ANYTHING.
I was standing here, in the hallway, just waiting. The hallway was set and everything was as I planned. So far at least. I mean I only planned out if she said yes, I didn't want to fathom the humiliation and disappointment and loss of purpose if she said no.
I had to lose her to realize how much I needed her, how much so puts purpose into my life. I dated her for a year and it was amazing. But I easily thought that maybe she didn't deserve me and maybe I didn't deserve her. I thought about how in no way would this work.
We'd never be able to spend our lives together. Hell, okay we're still in high school, but you're never to young to find your soul mate or to find your purpose.
I found her and broke up with her because I thought that two different people-as different as hot and cold- could never last.
All I could think of was what happened between then and now. It was him and her and still is. So hey I'm an idiot. An idiot in love. Wow I'm corny.
The bell rung and students flooded the hallway but many stopped and staying in the doorway just looking at the scene. I covered the floor with her favorite flowers, Lilacs, snowdrops, chrysanthemums. It made the shape of a heart. Out she came her mouth agape and she stepped over as many flowers, trying not to kill them all. She knew.
Her boyfriend was there and he just stood in the doorway, his face was plastered with a what the fuck face.
I was standing in the middle of the heart and finally she reached me.
"Carol Capprina Gorney-"
"Damn it Darren, you know I hate it when you call me Carol."
I sigh. I knew she was going to say that. "Okay fine Cappi, I love you dearly baby and you know that your boobs suit your luscious hip perfectly." I laugh knowing what she'll also say next.
"Hoe! You know that if someone told me one more time that my boobs suited my hips I was going to rip their dick off but no. You'd enjoy me touching your dick."
"Naturally," I smile, "But seriously now, I love you. And you are the most perfect specimen ever. I was a fool to give you up willingly. Now I'd take a bullet for you…just kidding I'd die."
"Darren!" She laughs as she pushes me. That Facebook groups we funny I'd have to admit.
"Okay I would take a bullet for you, in my head or heart-anywhere. I love you so much baby girl. I'm IN love with you. I'd die a happy many if you told me that you loved me even a third as much as I love you. And well-"
"Well what!?" She yells. She's hella impatient and I like to tease her.
"Shush. I'd love it if you'd be my forever. If you'd stay with me for the rest of my life as my wife. Oh damn that was so corny I even rhymed."
Her mouth hangs open and she looks shocked and confused and speechless.
"What the fuck? What do you think you're doing Da'vino?" Yep Darren Da'vino.
"Shawn way to ruin the moment." I smirk. I joke too much.
Shawn Richards, you can sum him up in three words. Jock, Cocky and dumbass.
Sure I'm also a jock and cocky AND even a dumbass but there's more to me than that. Not Shawn.
"Don't test me." The veins on his forehead are like about to burst. IN a short time he stomped through my flowers and get all up in my face.
"But Shawn, you've never passed a test before."
In an instant his fist collides with my jaw. I hear a crack and I impulsively hit back. I'm pretty sure I hit his ribs but I can't tell. Punch, kick, punch. It's all really a blur only because it happened so fast. You thought I was getting beat, well BULL SHIT. Haha slightly kidding. I'm Lacrosse captain and on the hockey team. I'm 6 foot 3 and Shawn is basketball captain and 6 foot. Fuckerrr!
Someone pulls me back and My sight is blurred for a moment and I see Cappi.
"Damn it Darren! What the fuck, why do you love pushing people's buttons? You're gonna get killed one day." Cappi lectures me briefly.
"And Shawn you idiot, Darren would've killed you. You have got to chill out. You didn't have to punch him!"
I'm immature and Cappi is quite maternal. She'd make the best mother. Mother of MY children.
"God Cappi! Darren could've killed me!? Me chill out? What the-"
"Shut the fuck up Shawn. He could've, you hit him and you didn't have much to back it up with. He talks but he can fight it too. And jeez, this was just between ME and DARREN. You didn't need to get involved!" She yelled.
"Oh really Cap? Really?! It's not JUST between you two! You're my girlfriend! I love you! More than that oaf and he asked you to marry him, that sure as hell involves me to! And you're one to speak Ms. Hot tempered irrational bitch."
"Love her more than me? Are you serious you nimrod, you don't know anything about me. You have an emotional range of a caveman." I scoff. We get back into each other's faces ready to fight again. Even if we're already bleeding, and bones are probably broken and we're bruised but hell I don't care.
"God chill out!" She hollers again right before the principal arrives.
I leave a note in Cappi's locker before I leave school. Me and Shawn both got suspended and I have to do some community service work for the whole ordeal of my proposal.
At 10 o'clock as I suspected Cappi stomped through my doorway right under my arm. Her heels clicking and her skirt whirls around her as she turns around to face my. The stairs right behind her.
She's bossy and irrational. I'm uh what's the word, obedient and typically level headed. I joke to much and she's rather serious.
"Darren! What in the world?!"
"What?" I smile, my arms up like I don't know.
"Darren, stop playing!"
"You know baby girl, you never gave me an answer."
"I'm being serious Darren." She says sternly.
"Just-ugh hold up okay. What was that all about? Please Darren." How could I resist a face like that?
"It's simple. You're my soul mate. I need you in my life forever." I state.
"Darren…" She moans. Oh her moans.
"I love you, do you love ,me?"
"I don't know…"
"You do know Cappi. Come on tell me."
"Okay, I, maybe I do. I can't, I love you but I can't."
"Ah hah! So you love me! You do!" I pick her up and spin her around, kissing her lips. Her very amazing lips.
I set her down and continue kissing her as I cup her face between my hands.
The kiss breaks to my dismay.
"Darren!" she yells.
"What? Wanna go and watch Desperate Housewives? I know how you love it and how it's on tonight."
"Yes! Wait no- wait yes I do. But I mean Why'd you do that?"
"Well I love you and you love me. I think there's nothing wrong with that. Not come onnn, you're gonna miss your favorite showww." I taunt her in a sing song voice.
"God, we'll talk about this once it's over!"
Cappi quickly rushes over to my room.
Together, we sit in my bed and Desperate Housewives is almost over. I didn't spend any time paying attention to the show. All eyes on Cappi.
As it ends and the next show starts and she turns off the tv.
"That was amazing! But I know you didn't pay attention, now let's talk."
"Wow, sounds like sex."
"Shut up. Not even, when we had sex I'd fall asleep and you'd sit and look at me and stroke my hair or my skin and then you'd wake up and make me breakfast. So shush."
"Oh okay if you want me to shut I'll just not say anything then. But that does sounds good, wanna give it a go?"
"Darren. Stop avoiding the question."
"Okay fine. But you stop avoiding your question as well."
"Okay, you go first."
"Fine. I've realized my mistake and I've figured that I can't live without you. I need you. Or my life isn't worth living. You give me purpose."
She has this big doe eyed look and it's adorable. I can't help it- I kiss her nose and press my forehead against hers.
"Yes to your question."
"What?!" I yell in utter dismay. She's serious? She's serious!
"What? You take it back?" She teases.
"No. No! No, no, no! I don't! Yes! Yes!" I fiercely kiss her. I'm the happier than I was when I had when I was 6 and got a puppy.
Granted, the puppy was a yappy little rat and I we gave it away but still, I realized that afterwards.
"So that means we're getting married right?" She clarifies.
"No it means we're getting a puppy, YES IT MEANS WE'RE GETTING MARRIED. Oh hey, you'll finally get to be a Desperate Housewife. Desperate for me."
"Funny." She rolls her eyes and kisses me.
"But it doesn't mean we aren't going to get a puppy." I say pointedly.
"Shut up." She laughs. Oh how I love her laugh. It's like music to my ears.
Cappi damn feisty so I think she'll break the news to Shawn quite well. But hey I'll be there to back her up. I really do love my height.
I'm not exactly the hulk but I do have muscle, skinny muscle and I can pack a punch worse than it seems. Hah, Shawn now knows firsthand.
Worst I got was bruises, cuts and a sore jaw. I'm pretty sure I broke a rib or two of his but that's it. Loser.
Okay, me and Shawn were..okay before. I was all super happy with Cappi but hey like always it was complicated and well Shawn apparently wanted some of that happiness. The jerk didn't even think that I wouldn't be over her.
I was a sad sick little puppy. Shawn asked her out a week after and it took him a year for her to finally say yes. I bet she sorry for that jackass but then after a while I guess she started to like him. Or something, I'm not sure.
"Cappi? Do you like Shawn? Did you like him?"
"What?" She looks up at me with those green eyes. Those gorgeous green eyes that seem to change colors sometimes that me melt.
"Cupcake, you heard me."
Her brows furrow and she looks slightly confused and slightly thinking. Perplexing. Cappi likes to think, and sometimes she doesn't like to think but she'll think anyway. She over thinks, she irrationally thinks, basically thinking is her thing. Unlike me, I just do or say. I'm impulsive and she's precarious.
"I mean well, at first I didn't like him. I was just sad about us being over. I never got over you but after awhile Shawn wouldn't leave me alone and seemed to really like me so I gave it a shot. Then I did start to like him, I forgot about you for a bit but it didn't last long and I guess I just stayed with him as a distraction." She lets out a breath.
When she said that she forgot about me my heart dropped. But then I got really happy as she continued to talk.
God she's expanding my emotional range to almost the level of pregnant woman.
"You forgot about me? I'm depressed by this."
"Well not about you, just about my feelings for you."
"I'm hoping you didn't forget about our sexual endeavors?" I smile mischievously.
"Sicko," she pauses, "Of course I haven't."
"Good." I smile and grab her waist pulling her closer.
As we both approach Shawn Cappi turns around.
"I don't want to do this! Can you do it?" She gives me her innocent puppy dog eyes. With that look she could get me to do anything, gay sex among them. Just kidding but you get my point.
"Cappi, you should do this," I say sternly, "Buuuut okay."
"Thank you! Wait! NO, I should do this. But ugh, knowing Shawn he'll do something stupid. Or say something to talk me out of it."
"And Lord knows that I don't want that. But Cappi just go."
Cappi doesn't like to hurt people and when she does she feels like shit about it and she'll be so guilty that she feels the need to make it up to them. It's great of her but sometimes I hate it. Like now for instance.
"Okay, I'll tell him."
He's looking at us from afar. We're close to his house and I know he's curious. And furious. Hah I even rhymed.
She slowly walks over to him. Her hips swinging, in a very sexy way if I may add. Cap is also in heels, she's so comfortable in them it's like she could run and jump and dance in them. She needs the height so since 8th grade she's been wearing them.
They talk and talk and talk and he looks kind of desperate. Good better get on his knees and beg only to get rejected. Sucker, I win again.
She walks over and as always her hips sway. She looks perplexed. Perplexing.
"Well," She cringes.
"Well," She looks down, thinking over what she should say first.
My frowns furrow and I slightly frown.
"Let's go." I say and she doesn't disagree.
We both start to walk in silence.
I kick a pebble as we walk it's not the season for any leaves. I love to step on leaves the crunching noise is awesome.
I love fall weather the best, I think I'd want to get married to Cappi in the fall. I love how unpredictable it is. It's so hrm, what's the word deviant? I know that Cappi hates unpredictable things. But she loves me so I'm just glad about that.
"He asked me to marry him."
"What?" What the hell? Oh my fucking God.
"What did you say?" I ask immediately, not wanting to wait for a reply.
"I said that I had to think about it."
"Think about it? What? Why?"
"Because Darren! I'm so in love with you but I don't know I can't just drop Shawn!" She looks guilty.
"So you want to marry him?"
" For fuck's sake I'm 17 years old! Getting married should be the last thing on my mind. Along with children!"
"Thanks for crushing that hope too Cap, our children would be drop dead gorgeous."
"Okay, okay. I know both should be but I can't let you go! Cappi I love you more than anything, you mean so much to me, more than my own life. And we don't have to get married immediately, I just want you to be my fiancé and I want to know that we will be getting married as soon as we can."
It looks like her eyes are about to water.
"Cappi don't cry." My heart melts and I'm just dying inside that she looks sad.
"It's just Darren, this is all so sweet and complicated! Like I just I wish this was easy."
I smirk, "Nothing is ever easy babe."
My mind is racing. Cappi has been going to school and there really isn't much to do. I mean everyone is in school and I could go somewhere. But there's no one to go with and going by myself is pretty much useless.
So now I just sit in bed. Like I have been. Bor-ing. I miss Cappi, she hasn't been talking to me in hopes of making up her own mind without any influence.
It's one o'clock, let's waste sometime with sleep.
"Mhmm…" I mumble getting up; it's two in the morning. Who know anyone could sleep that long.
"Cappi?" When did she get here? But she's sleeping now.
"Cap." I shake her gently and within time she's awake.
"Mhmm finally you're awake. You mom let me in like at nine last night but you were sleeping. What, take some pills?"
"Oh totally, I'm such the pill popper," I roll my eyes, "So not that I don't like the visit but why?"
"Well I was going to tell you something important."
"I talked to Shawn today and told him some news."
"And what news may that be?" Now she's teasing me. Ugh, normally I love it but this time I really am hating it.
"Well I told him that I've decided that I want to marry some guy."
"Really and who may that be?"
"Hmm, well he's athletic, he's a really good kisser and well he's cocky as hell and is a total dumbass."
My heart is pumping, so far it's not sounding like me.
"But he can be smart and he's sweet and funny, I've known him for a really long time and he knows way too much about me," She smiles, "He makes my heart melt and he's really tall and really immature, light colored eyes, shaggy hair. You might know him" She finishes.
Oh god I'm grinning like a fool, it actually kind of hurts to smile like this. But here I am grinning like the idiot I am.
I grab for Cappi and take her head in my hands engulfing her with a kiss. A kiss like the kiss is saving my life and I need it to survive, her lips are probably bruising and puffing a bit.
"You know, I really love you." I whisper our lips barely parting.
"I know you do loser." She laughs.
I take her and run outside.
I scream at the top of my lungs, "HEY WORLD, I WANT TO LET YOU KNOW THAT CAROL CAPPRINA GORNEY IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, SHE'S THE MOST FUCKING BEAUTIFUL GORGEOUS WOMAN TO EVER EXIST. AND OH HOW I'VE FALLEN FOR HER-"
"Darren shut up! You'll wake people up." She smiles.
And oh how that smile makes my heart soar.