Author: DayOfTheBees PM
A E-journal/pillowbook of sorts. My life in the summer between leaving compulsary education and entering sixth form, and maybe after. Be nice. Will sometimes feature little bits of stories done when I'm bored.Rated: Fiction T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,484 - Updated: 06-05-10 - Published: 06-03-10 - id: 2813596
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
The time is currently 5 minutes to 4 on the 5th June 2010, and I am listening to Boulevard Of Broken Dreams, by Green Day, who are bloody brillant live.
Right. Time for some home truths I guess.
I can't remember the last time I showed anyone my true emotions. I have a problem with it. I don't know why, but I do. Well, no, I DO remember, but that had a reason. Before that, and since? I don't know. I'm known for being the happy one, the one who is never sad. The one to be relied on to be happy. Whenever someone asks how I am, I always say 'I'm fine.' And no one has a problem with that, because its the answer they expect from me.
I have self esteem issues, in that I don't have one. I am wearing shorts today, only because I'm not planning on leaving the house. I hate my legs. I didn't used to. I loved them when I still went horseriding. Nine years of it gives you brillant legs. Now that muscle has turned to flab. I have a dent and a lovely purple line one of of them from where I fell off a wall when I was younger. I'm fat, and I know I am, but I can't motivate myself to do anything about it. I'm not good at anything. I used to attempt the violin (cats dying) and I attempt the guitar. I'm vaugley better at that, but not by much. I can't draw, I can't write to save my life, although I still attempt it with my friend. I've written two things in my entire life I am happy with. One is the puppet thing from the last chapter, and the other is my other story on here. Both stolen from other ideas. I am incapable of coming up with ideas on my own.
Anyway, off my lack of self esteem.
Today has been even more boring then yesterday. I stayed in and did maths revision and watched The Nightmare Before Christmas. And listened to music. Its REALLY muggy today, no breeze whatsoever, so its really horrible. 'Scratching could not make it worse, as 'twere such a face as yours'. I love Shaksperian insults. That one means 'You're ugly'. 'But thy eternal winter shall not fade And the sun is non existant today I stand in everlasting dark and shade'
Three lines from a sonnet I had to write in year 9. Three lines out of 14 that I liked. Thats the way my life is. I like some parts of things I do, but not all of them. Not most of them.
It is now 12 minutes past 4, and I am listening to Standing On The Ruin Of A Beautiful Empire by Lostalone. Its 9 minutes long. But when I saw them supporting 30 Seconds To Mars, they played it live. They cut it down, but not much. But you don't care about that.