Author: Life Sucks.Be Happy PM
Kaycie is obsessed with her former English teacher, Katie Nykx. She knows everything there is to know about her. Or so she thinks. She never thought she had a chance. Until a weekend field trip changes everything. Teacher/Student FemslashRated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 60,453 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 10-15-10 - Published: 09-27-10 - id: 2851080
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Part One: The Trip
From the day I was a little girl I was inspired by stories. Any kind of stories. It didn't really matter what kind of stories. I didn't like to tell stories. I just liked to listen to them. I liked to read them. I never really wanted to be a part of them. I don't like being involved. I like to observe. I like to watch. It's what I do.
I have always liked to know what's going on around me. Because of this I have gotten good at noticing things. It only takes me one look, for maybe ten seconds, to know exactly what she's wearing.
She being the most amazing teacher on the face of the planet, Katheryn D. Nikx. The name doesn't fit her. Well, the last name does. Katheryn doesn't though. Kate fits better. Katie fits even better than that.
See, despite the fact that she is a twenty seven year old English teacher she looks like she could blend in with the freshman. She has this innocent looking face. And her personality is one that belongs in high school. Whenever I see her walking down the hallway she's talking and gossiping with this other teacher. They blend right in with the students.
Her height doesn't help either. She's short. Almost as short as I am. I'm pretty short. I am five foot one. She is maybe one inch taller than me.
The fact that she looks so young is one of the things I love about her. Sometimes it seems like naiveness, but I know different. I don't know how I found out half the things I know about her. I know a lot about her. I can tell you almost everything you ever wanted to know. I bet she would find that a little creepy if she knew. She doesn't though. I know that she knows I exist. Mostly because she snuck up on me a few months back. She grabbed my shoulders from behind and she screamed my name. I was surprised. I wasn't expecting it. I wasn't expecting her to remember me. It doesn't really matter though. We just talked for a few minutes and went our separate ways. She didn't tell me anything about herself there.
I think I know most of it from just watching and listening. I've discovered that you can learn a fucking lot from just listening to people. It doesn't really matter if they're talking to you or not. It doesn't even matter if they know you are there or not. You just have to listen. Sometimes it's better when people don't think you are listening. I've found my iPod headphones to be useful there. They make it seem as though you are listening to music when you aren't. And people will talk more when they don't know someone is listening to every word they say.
At least that's what I've noticed in the large portion of my life that has been spent listening.
Sometimes you have to be selective as to who you listen to. I can hear more than one person at once. I can multitask, real good. It's one of the things I'm good at. Everyday in math class, I listen to the teacher and her. She isn't my teacher. She isn't my teacher at all this year. Her class is across from my math class though. I can see her through the open doors. I can hear her too, because she's loud. She always talks really loud. I can almost always hear what she's saying from my math class. Even over my teacher.
I'm sure he's noticed that I watch her and that I listen to her in class. I'm doing good though so it doesn't really matter.
He yelled at the class last week, because we weren't paying attention and doing other stuff. He kept mentioning people not doing their work. I decided this didn't mean me because I always do my work. Like I said, I'm a good multitasker. I can pay attention in class, pay attention to her class, write down all the notes, get ahead on the worksheet and doodle all at the same time. That's why no one ever yells at me. I'm always doing the right thing even when I'm not. I do both at once, if that makes any sense.
Anyways, I'm not as much of a creeper as I seem to be. I do actually know her. Katie, I mean. She was my English teacher, freshman year. She was the first teacher I encountered in high school. I had her first period. It was a very great introduction to high school. Of course I didn't like her as much back then. She was over energetic and that was before I realized that life was a good thing. I was a negative person back then. I am so much the opposite now. I am a positive person. I believe that life is worth living and there is no reason to be sad. I don't think I really have negative emotions anymore. I don't really get angry. I don't know if that's as good of a thing as it seems to be. Because I don't get angry when people do things I sometimes assume they won't get angry with me. That is not always a correct assumption. I should really stop assuming. I'm not really good at it. I usually get things wrong when I try to guess. Except the jar of jelly beans. I get that right. It's really easy. My math teacher, last year, taught us how to use geometry to figure it out. I decided it was much easier to memorize how many beans were in a box and look for the boxes lying around. Or how many jelly beans can fit in each kind of jar. I know that too. I don't really know why. I just know things. It's what I do. Anyway, enough about jelly beans. I wasn't talking about them. I was talking about Katie. That's what I call her in my head. It fits her better than Miss Nikx. She never got married so she's Miss. She doesn't wearing an engagement right either. She doesn't seem like the marrying type to me. But then again, a lot of people don't seem like the marring kind to me. Maybe it's because I don't ever want to get married. It's not because my parents are divorced either. I like that. It wasn't like they ever fought either. It was just there. Anyway, I don't believe in marriage because I won't need a piece of paper to tell me when I'm in love. That and I don't live in a state that accepts gay marriage. See, sometimes I'm torn on the issue of gay marriage. Sure, I think that everyone should be equal and all of that stuff. But I don't believe in marriage. If gay marriage becomes legal that just makes it that much harder for me to abolish marriage.
Not that I would ever succeed at that anyway. I'm not good enough to do that. I don't have enough support for it.
I'm digressing again. I like that word, digressing. It was a vocab word last week. I knew it already though. I like words. They'll tell you anything you need to know. I had this theory once that the dictionary held all the answers to life.
That fell apart when I realized that life isn't a question. But I realized it held the answer to that too. It told me that the purpose of life is to live and that's all there is to it.
I think people over complicate life sometimes. A lot of the time actually. Life isn't a complicated thing. People make it that way. Life itself is rather simple. You are born, you reproduce, you die. At least, that's how it works in the animal kingdom. It doesn't always work like that with people. I think it should though.
Anyway, I'm digressing again. I digress about the word digress a lot.
Anyway, I was talking about Katie. I do that a lot too.
I think what first led me to start paying attention to her in particular was her hair. Her looks in general, really. She's beautiful . Her hair is shoulder length and dark red. I love red hair. I always have. I don't know why. I used to wish I had red hair. I don't anymore though. I like my brown hair perfectly fine.
Anyway, I like it best when she wears her hair down and straight. I think her hair is naturally straight because it looks more fake and frizzy when she curls it. She does that about once a week. I keep meaning to make a chart to determined how often she does that. She wears her hair up sometimes too. She wears it up in a high pony tail. Like the high school girls in the movies do. Sometimes she wears it up in a bun. I don't like that as much. She wears hoop earrings a lot. I think it works for her no matter how much I don't like them. She doesn't wear that much make up. I don't think she really needs it. She looks good with out it. Her eyes are a brown colour. I wouldn't exactly call it chocolate, but it's a nice colour none the less. I like it. Anyway. I know what she wears a lot too. She wears cardigans. She's the only person I know who isn't old and wears them regularly. They work on her too. She wears skirts a lot. And Capri's, she wears those a lot too. They work on her. She wears all sorts of different shoes. She wears flats a lot. There is a white pair and a pair of black ones with a little bow. I like those, just not the bow. I don't really like bows. They work for her though. She makes bows work. She wears long sleeve shirts all the time too. I think they look good on her even though I don't normally like them. She wears black a lot too. I like that. She looks good in black. (I'm not just saying that because I think she looks good in anything. I don't. I don't think she looks good in yellow. I don't like yellow.)
Another thing about Katie is that she is a giant ball of energy. The energy is giant, not her. She's a little chubby, but not so that you notice it unless you are looking. I didn't even notice it until I saw her wearing jeans. They make her ass look so much bigger than it is. I don't know why. I like it though. I like a lot of stuff.
Anyway, she's energetic. She does drink coffee, but I'm pretty sure that she is energetic without it. That's another thing I don't like, coffee. Anyway, she isn't hyper. She's just energetic. I like it. She's loud. She's energetic. She's always happy. I have never seen her go more than ten minutes without smiling. She has a wonderful smile. It's a smile that can't be photographed though. Not because it's not there long enough, it most definitely is. I don't know why it just doesn't come out right in photographs. Maybe it needs her energy. That energy makes her who she is. I doubt she would nearly as attractive as she is without it.
Sometimes I think there must have been some terrible thing in her past that turned her off dating. Everyone at school is practically in love with her and she's still single. I swear to god that I was once in a study hall where everyone, guys, girls, teacher, everyone except one gay guy, had a crush on her. I only know one person who doesn't even think she's hot. That's my friend Kris. Kristopher Jennings. I eat lunch with him. He has her this year, for freshman English. He's a sophomore though. He failed last year. I don't know how, it was easy. Anyway, he has her this year. I wrote "Miss Nikx is hot" on his binder almost twenty times. I don't think he really liked that. He doesn't really like her. I don't even know if she noticed that it was there. I think she must have because it was in hot pink sharpy. You could see it clearly even though his binder is mostly black. I wonder if he told her I wrote that. I don't suppose it matters. See, it's not like I've ever tried to hide that I have a crush on her. It's not just her looks anymore. It's her. I love almost everything about her. I found her facebook page and she likes a lot of the same TV shows that I do. A lot of the same books too. The ones I haven't read yet sound interesting too. I like to read. I always have. I liked it when I was little. She likes reading too, she listed it under her interests. I keep meaning to go into her classroom and ask for a copy of the books that are her favorite. I looked them up online. They sounded interesting. I'll read them eventually.
What was I saying? Oh yeah. She's got good taste in music too. It's mostly country. Country isn't my favorite, but I like it. The other stuff is mostly pop. I like it. She likes to sing along to music, I learned that freshman year. She's not the world's best singer. I'd listen to it anyway because it's amusing. I remember when I was a freshman she used to sing Eye of The Tiger all the time because we watched Rocky. I didn't like it then. I think I'd like it more now though. I don't know . I didn't really pay attention to it then, simply because it didn't interest me.
I'm sure I sound like a big creeper, listing off all this stuff about her. I could tell you more. I could tell you her address. I could tell you her phone number. I could tell you all about her parents and her brother. It's amazing what you can find out from a few simple pieces of information. All I had to know was her name, age and brother's name and I found out a whole shitload of stuff. It kind of scares me what you can find out if you bother to try just a little. For just ninety-nine cents I could have found out so much more. I didn't have a credit card though and it was probably a scam anyway. It's scary anyway though. Anyway, back to me being a creeper. Mostly I just listen to things. That's how I find out things. I know all of my teachers first names from first grade until now because I listen to them when they talk to other teachers. I didn't even look online for any of them. Like I said before, listening is how I learn stuff about people. And I like to learn stuff about people.
So anyway, this has a point to it. It's not just me going on about how amazing Katie is. Although I'm sure I could do that for enough words for this to be a novel. It only takes fifty thousand.
Anyway, this is the story of how me and Katie's relationship progressed over the weekend of the school whale watching trip.
She was a last minute chaperone when the original one got sick. I was very glad for this. Not that the other teacher was sick of course, but that Katie got to come on the trip.
I roomed with my friend, Scarlet. Me and Scarlet are really different from each other. It doesn't matter though because sometimes we are really close friends. Not all the time though.
Scarlet is a girly girl. She wears a lot of make up and takes way too many showers. It can get annoying rooming with her. She's my only girl friend though. Sometimes, she says this is weird because I like girls.
Anyways, I'm more of a tomboy. Most of my friends, except Scarlet, are guys.
I was hanging out at the pool with them the first night we were at the hotel. There were four of them, and me.
I was sitting on the edge of the shallow end dangling my feet in. I hadn't bothered to change into my bathing suit so I had my jeans on. They were rolled up to my knees.
Kris was at the other end of the pool. He was about to do a cannonball into the pool. Kris is fat. The other three guys were in the pool already, cheering him on. The boy on the right was my friend Tanner. I never understood why Tanner hung out with the other guys in the group. He didn't always fit in. For starters, he's gay and he flaunts it. It makes him stands out, at least in the group.
The guy in the middle is the leader, I guess. His name is Mike. He's a big guy and a bit of a trouble maker. I don't think Katie was thrilled to find out that she was his chaperone. He was in my class freshman year, Katie's class. Having Mike in your class generally didn't make you like him.
He's not as bad everyone thinks he is though. I didn't like him until I got to know him. I understand why people don't like him. He can be a bit of an asshole.
The black guy on the other side is Robbie Yellinks.
Anyways, we were at the hotel pool. Kris jumped in the pool and it splashed. We were the only ones at the pool.
"Jump in, Kaycie," said Tanner. "Go on."
"I don't have a bathing suit," I said.
"So, jump in in your clothes," said Kris. He laughed.
I decided to. I tossed my hat over to one of the chairs, the one where Tanner left his towel. It landed perfectly in the center.
"Nice throw," said Robbie with a laugh. I smiled and walked around to the deep end of the pool.
"Jump," said Tanner. I did.
I could hear them yelling and cheering as I splashed water onto the floor.
"Nice jump," called Mike. I grinned at him as I shook the water from my hair. My clothes were heavy in the water.
I got out and Mike pushed me back in. I laughed as I splashed in the water.
"Boys!" called a voice from the door. "Don't you know how to read? The sign says no jumping in the pool."
It was Katie. She was standing by the door, dressed in a bikini. She had a shirt over it, but the effect is still rather great.
All heads in the pool turned to her. Everyone's eyes were staring at her thighs, where her shirt ended. Well, except Tanner and Kris. Tanner, because he's gay and Kris because Kris is a dumbass. Like I said, Kris doesn't think she's hot. Tanner does though, even though he doesn't like girls.
"Or should I say, girls," she said.
"There ain't know girls here," said Robbie. He's not the brightest bulb in the bunch.
"Hey," I protested. I didn't care that much.
Katie's eyes turned towards me. It's kind of hard to remember that she is a teacher when she looks like that.
"Kaycie, I didn't eve see you there," she said. "You aren't supposed to be in the pool with your clothes on."
I looked at her for a minute.
"Yes, mam," I said as I got out. I glanced at the boys. "Can I go in naked?"
The look on Katie's face was hilarious. It turned red. Her face did, I mean. She was blushing really hard. It was so cute.
The boys were laughing, real hard. Well, except for Tanner. He was making a face. Like he didn't want to see a naked chick, which he probably didn't.
"No," said Katie when she finally found her voice again. "Kaycie, come with me. That's not an appropriate comment. Boys and Tanner, jump in the pool again and you stay in your room for the rest of the trip."
I got out of the pool and dripped my way over to her. She walked out and I followed.
"Sorry about the comment," I said. It had kind of slipped out. I don't normally say things like that. I really don't.
Katie gave me a look.
"I don't really care," she said.
"So why am I out here?" I asked. Not that I minded. I didn't mind at all that I was walking around the hotel campus with dripping wet clothes and Katie in a bikini. I didn't mind at all. So long as Katie didn't notice how my eyes were always attached to the general area of her boobs. I don't even know if she knows I like girls. I didn't freshman year, not really. I wasn't as interested in dating or any of that shit freshman year. I am now though. And Katie has great boobs. Just saying.
"You are here because you did make an inappropriate comment and this does require some form of punishment."
I must say, she did not mean what I was thinking. I have a dirty mind sometimes.
"What kind of punishment?" I asked. I think there was an eager tone to my voice, but I don't know because I couldn't hear it. I can never really hear my own voice. It's weird.
She gave me a look. I think she knew what I was thinking. I don't know how she could.
"I don't know. I think we're just going to walk around for a while. Then you can go back to your friends, well if you put on a bathing suit."
"I don't have one," I said.
"You didn't bring one?" asked Katie.
I shook my head. I couldn't believe I was having a conversation with Katie Nikx. I was actually talking to her. Oh my god. I was talking to her. I was talking to her. I was talking to her.
I dripped a little on to the side walk. It was rather cold out. I shivered a little.
"Well at the very least you need dry clothes."
"I know," I said. I didn't actually have any. I had been planing on wearing the same thing the next day so all I brought with me in terms of clothes was a pair of underwear.
Katie gave me a look.
"You did pack other clothes, right?"
I blushed and shook my head. I blush a lot.
Katie raised her eyebrow.
"You didn't bring other clothes?" she asked surprised. I blushed again.
"I wasn't expecting to jump in a pool," I told her.
I could have sworn she smiled a little, but it was gone rather quickly.
"Well, I can't let you back into the hotel if you are going to stay in those clothes for the whole night."
I didn't say anything because I didn't know what to say. I couldn't very well stay outside, could I?
She looked me up and down a few times before she spoke again. The part of my mind that is and will always be obsessed with Katie Nixk was convinced she was checking me out. The more rational part said that made no sense, not only because she's a teacher and teacher's aren't supposed to check out students, but because she's straight. Anyways, she said something after a minute.
"Well, lucky for you I over packed. Come on, I'll lend you something to wear."
I stood there for a moment, not comprehending what she said. Did Katie Nixk really offer to share her clothes with me? What the hell was happening?
She didn't seem to notice me standing there. She had already walked off in the direction of her room and I had to run after her to catch up.
The hotel had a few different buildings, as it happened we were in the same one. You could only get to the rooms from the outside. We were silent on the way over there.
Her face is always red. I don't know why. Maybe she's always sunburned from the amount of time she spends outside. Maybe it's just because she's always moving. Maybe it's because she was born red. I don't know.
I watched as she searched her pockets for a room key. It was cute watching her dig around in her pockets.
One thing I've learned from watching Katie is that she's clumsy. She's really clumsy. She broke her leg once. I don't entirely know how, but I do know that it involved a spiny chair and a fan. I like how clumsy she is, it's cute.
I know I shouldn't be calling someone who is eleven years older than me cute, but I really can't help myself. She is cute. Everybody says so.
She finally found the key and tried a few times before she got the door to open.
"Stupid door," she muttered as she pushed it open. I tried to hide my smile, but I don't think it worked too well. I'm not good at hiding stuff like that. I never really have been.
She tripped over the step up as she went in. I didn't bother to hide my laughter this time because I knew there was no point.
She turned back to look at me as I stepped up into her room. I wondered who else was staying in it. I didn't know what other chaperone she was rooming with. Whoever it was, she she wasn't in there then. She closed the door behind us and went over to her bag.
It was red. She likes the colour red. And blue. She likes blue. That's what colour her car is.
Anyway, she rooted around in her suitcase for a few minutes. She glanced at me a few times in the process, trying to decide what to give me to wear I guess. She tossed a shirt at me. It was lose and grey and it had Mickey Mouse on it. It looked like it was meant to sleep in. It was long. It wasn't like the things I normally see her wear. She was still wearing her bathing suit.
Anyways, I caught the tee shirt and stood there as she looked for a pair of pants.
"You're dripping on the carpet," she said. She tossed a bra in my direction. "Go put those on."
I nodded and went into the bathroom. I took of my wet shirt with some difficulty and peeled off my bra. I dropped them onto the floor and picked up the bra that Katie handed me. Her boobs are bigger than mine so it didn't really fit right. I didn't care that much. I wasn't even thinking about that. All I was thinking was that I was wearing Katie Nikx's bra. I couldn't believe that was happening to me. I really couldn't. I couldn't believe that. I stood there and stared at myself in the mirror for a minute. The bra was black and it had a little bra at the front. Normally, I hate bows. I liked this one. I pulled the shirt on. It was long enough that it covered my shorts. I pulled it up so it wasn't touching my wet shorts. I picked up my clothes and layed them out on the counter. I opened the door.
"Don't come out here with those wet shorts," she called. "Take them off before you come out here. I'm still looking for a new pair of pants. You can come out here without them if you want."
I thought about it for a second before I stripped off the shorts and put then on the counter with the other clothes.
I went out into the room. I was standing in Katie Nikx's hotel room wearing Katie Nikx's bra and shit and no pants. And Katie was only wearing a bikini.
I swear to god you don't know how many thoughts were raising through my head at that moment. Then she turned to face me for a second. I honestly couldn't do anything other than stare at her.
"Are you okay?" she asked me. Her hair swished as she moved her head.
I nodded. I didn't know if I was okay, but it was best to say I was. She pulled a pair of jeans out of her bag and handed them to me. It was the closest I've ever been to her. Oh my god.
"I don't think my underwear would fit you, sorry Kaycie."
I couldn't think of anything to say to that.
"Go, put on those pants and come out here. We aren't done yet."
I went into the bathroom and came back out with a pair of Katie's pants and no underwear on.
I was in her hotel room with no underwear on. Oh My god.
Sh was sitting on the bed. She had taken her tee shirt off so all she was wearing was her bathing suit. It was blue. She looked really good in blue. Not to mention the amount of skin showing. Oh my god. She was wearing a bikini.
I must have been staring with my mouth open because Katie laughed a little.
"Close your mouth," she said. "You're catching flies."
I shut my mouth and blushed.
She chuckled a little.
"Relax, Kaycie. You're being a little more obvious about your staring than normal. However, I assume that has something to do with the bikini."
I just stared at her. Not her body this time. Her face. She knew. She knew. Oh my god. She knew I was watching her. That could not be good.
She laughed a little at the sight of my face.
"What?" I muttered when I found my voice.
"You heard me, Kaycie. I know you watch me all the time. You can be a little obvious sometimes. I don't mind at all. I really don't."
I couldn't think of the right thing to say so I sat down on the edge of the bed.
This had to be a dream. It had to be. I couldn't possibly believe it was all real.
It was though. She leaned back on the pillows a little and even more of her boobs showed. I couldn't help, but stare even though I knew it wasn't a smart thing to do. She didn't really seem to mind though. In fact, she seemed to be rather enjoying it. She crossed her legs and looked at me.
"So, Kaycie, what are we going to do about this?" she asked.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Well, it's quite obvious that you have a crush on me."
"A lot of people have crushes on you," I pointed out.
"That is true," she agreed. "However, you are the one making it the most obvious and you are the one that seems the most interesting."
I sat there and tried to figure out what exactly Katie was saying. She didn't seem entirely opposed to the idea of a girl having a crush on her. Suddenly I wasn't so sure that she was straight. Suddenly I didn't know anything. And I hate not knowing anything.
"What?" I asked.
"You are making your crush the most obvious. I kind of like it."
Was she saying what I think she was saying?
"Does that mean I'm not in trouble?"
"What would you be in trouble for?"
"I don't know."
"I already said that I don't mind you staring. You seem rather confused. I assume because I'm not angry that I caught you staring. Or is it because I'm not freaked out that you are a girl?"
"Both," I answered and I blushed. She knew I like girls. Oh my god.
"I'm not a homophone," she told me. "I have absolutely no problem with gay people and even less of a problem with lesbians. You are a lesbian, correct?"
I nodded and blushed.
"There's no need to be ashamed of that, Kaycie. You seem embarrassed."
"I wasn't exactly planning on you finding out that I'm a lesbian," I admitted.
"I figured it was something like that. No need to worry, I've known that for awhile. You were making out with that girl Tasha in the hallway."
Tasha. She was a random fling last year, nothing more than that. I almost forgot about her.
"Oh, yeah Tasha. You saw that?"
"The way you stare at me sometimes also suggest that. It's a bit obvious," she told me.
I had not been aware of that. It is not like I really try to hide it. I have always been rather open about my sexuality.
I didn't think Katie knew though. Apparently, she did.
Katie smiled a little.
"You are kind of cute when you are surprised," she told me.
I blushed. She thought I was cute? Was this some kind of joke?
It seemed a bit like some kind of cruel joke. Maybe something Mike would do. Mike could be cruel at times. Actually, depending on who you asked he could be cruel all the time. Mike could be a bit of a bully at times. Or all the time.
Anyways, I wasn't with Mike. I was in Katie Nikx's hotel room and she was wearing a bikini. Who the fuck cares about Mike? Definitely not me.
"I am?" I asked.
"I'm pretty sure you aren't supposed to say that about a student."
She rolled her eyes.
"Who's going to yell at me? You are the only on in this room and I doubt you would."
She did have a point there. I told her so.
She smiled at me.
"Make yourself comfortable, Kaycie. I think, you're going to be here for awhile."
"I am?" I asked a lot of questions like that. Two word questions that echo the previous statement. I've always done that.
"You are. You can't go back to the pool because you have no bathing suit. All of your friends are there so you may as well stay here."
I didn't point out that Scarlet wasn't at the pool. She was in our room, watching some fashion show. I didn't want to watch it.
I leaned back against the pillows a little.
Katie smiled. She does that a lot. Smiles, I mean.
She reached for the remote and I watched her body stretch. I knew I wasn't supposed to be. Watching, I mean. I knew it wasn't the best idea. She already knew I liked her though, so there was no point in hiding it. At least, I think that was my reasoning. It doesn't really matter now.
She returned to her position with the remote in her hand. It had been on the floor by the side of the bed we were sitting on. I kind of wondered why she was still wearing her bathing suit. I wasn't complaining though. There would be no reason to complain about that. None at all. She looks hot in that bikini.
She pointed the remote at the TV and pressed the button.
The TV turned on. She flipped through the channels until she found an old rerun of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. She put the remote down.
"Do you like this show?" she asked me.
I nodded. I did like that show. I knew she liked that show too. It was on facebook.
We watched the rest of the episode. It was an Alex episode. I've always liked Alex better even though Casey is a redhead. I like redheads. Katie is a redhead. Casey is really more my type, but I still like Alex.
I glanced over at Katie a few times during the episode. Her attention was entirely caught by Alex Cabot as well.
Was it possible? Was it possible that Katie was into girls? I kind of hoped so. Actually, there was no kind of about it. I did hope so.
She didn't entirely seem surprised by the idea. She didn't seem against it.
I didn't know what to think.
I wasn't entirely paying attention to the episode. The combination of Katie and Alex made that a little hard. Paying attention, I mean.
Another episode came on. It was a Casey episode.
I watched Katie out of the corner of my eye because staring just seemed a little creepy. Not that I'm not a creeper. I mean, I am.
Her eyes seemed to attach themselves to Casey. The episode was about gay and lesbian rights. There are a lot of SVU episodes about that.
"That guy is an asshole," stated Katie as we watched Olivia interrogating a suspect. "Olivia should kick his butt."
I agreed with this.
We watched for a few minutes before she spoke again.
"Olivia is hot when she's telling off pervs," said Katie dreamily.
I stared at her. Did she really just say what I think she said?
Did she just say Olivia Benson is hot? In a dreamy voice?
"What?" she asked as she glanced over at me.
"Did you just say Olivia is hot?"
"Is that a problem?"
I shook my head. Why on earth would that be a problem? Katie Nixk just said a girl was hot.
"You look surprised," she said.
"I am," I said. "I wasn't expecting you to say that."
"Well, she is. Don't you agree?"
Of course I agreed. That wasn't the point though.
"Yes," I agreed. "Olivia is very hot."
"Well then, why wouldn't I say something like that?"
"I didn't you would think she was," I said honestly. I usually try to tell the truth. They say honesty is the best policy. I don't know who 'they' are, but the idea still holds.
Anyway, I'm digressing again.
"So what you are trying to say is that you didn't think I would think another woman was hot?" concluded Katie.
"Something like that," I mumbled. I was slightly embarrassed. I generally try not to make assumptions. They always in in wrong conclusions and chaos. At least they do in cartoons. You can learn a lot from cartoons, almost everything you need to know really.
I need to stop digressing. I'm doing it again.
She didn't seem to care that I had assumed. Maybe she took it for granted that people thought she was straight. I wasn't so sure anymore.
"It doesn't matter to me. I don't particularly have a preference as to gender. If someone is hot than they're hot. It doesn't matter what parts they have," she told me.
I wasn't that surprised to hear it anymore. I was a little surprised that she was telling me though. I didn't know why she was.
I wasn't sure what to say to that.
"I wouldn't have guessed," I said after a minute.
"I know," she said with a little laugh. "Do me a favor, Kaycie, don't mention that to anyone. It's not that I really care if people know, but I do teach a lot of freshman and well, they are freshman."
I knew what she meant. Freshman are very immature creatures. It is a known fact to everyone except the freshman. Sometimes I forget that Katie teaches freshman. Kris isn't a freshman, he's a sophomore, but he managed to fail English last year. He's not always smart.
"I won't tell," I said. "Uh, why did you tell me?"
I had to know. There are times when my brain won't shut up until it learns what it wants to know. It can be very stubborn.
She gave a little shrug and her boobs bounced a little. My eyes flickered to them.
"There wasn't really a reason not to and it came up."
We had both lost track of what was going on in the SVU episode by this point.
I was kind of wondering who was sharing a room with her so I asked.
"No one," she said. "They stuck me by myself for some reason."
I was surprised. That didn't make any sense to me.
I suppose that didn't really matter much.
"OH," I said and we went back to watching the SVU episode.
I looked at the clock on the cable box. I had been there for over an hour. I wondered if the boys were still at the pool. I had no way of knowing and honestly I didn't care. I was still on Katie Nikx's bed, wearing her clothes, and watching an SVU episode about gay rights while she lay there in a bikini. Not to mention the fact that she wasn't straight.
I really hoped it wasn't a dream. It wasn't. I am very glad for that.
We watched another episode of SVU. It was a Casey episode again.
It amazed me how obvious it was that she wasn't straight after you spent any time at all with her. Maybe she was only like that if you knew about it.
I wasn't sure.
"What's the chance that your clothes are dry yet?" she asked.
"Kind of slim," I said. I didn't want to get up and check. I was content right there on the bed. I didn't really want to put my own clothes back on. I was perfectly comfortable in hers. They were too big and I like my clothes to be too big. It's more comfortable.
She glanced at me.
"I guess you can keep them for the night. You should probably go back to your room or whatever before Kris decides I've kidnapped you."
I laughed. It was something Kris would say. He would probably also say I enjoyed being kidnapped by her.
I probably would too. I didn't say any of that out loud though.
"He probably already did," I said.
She laughed and turned off the TV.
"You know, I was planning on swimming today," she said as she looked down at her bikini clad body.
"I kind of figured that," I said.
She looked down again.
"I'm not sure if should. The pool will be crowded by teenagers, most of whom think I am hot."
"You are hot," I said before I thought about it.
"Thanks," she said. She blushed. She's cute when she blushes. Hell, she's always cute.
"Even Tanner thinks so and he doesn't even like girls."
"I don't think I've had the pleasure of being introduced to your friend Tanner. I must say from what I know about your friends he seems like the nicest one."
"He's really nice," I said.
"He certainly makes an impression."
"He does," I agreed. Tanner is a flamboyant person. He loves to wear bright colours. He owns more pink clothes than I ever will. I don't really like pink. Tanner loves it. Knowing Tanner and knowing Mike you wouldn't think they would be friends. They are though. They've been best friends since they were in diapers. Tanner loved pink even then.
I'm digressing again. I need to stop doing that.
"Well, I'm certainly flattered that a gay boy thinks I'm hot," she said. It sounded like she didn't think she was hot. Maybe she didn't.
"I only know one person that doesn't think you're hot," I told her.
"And who would that be?"
"Kris. He doesn't like you very much," I said.
"Maybe because he's failing my class," she suggested.
"That could have something to do with it."
"Should I assume you were the one who wrote all over his binder with the bright pink Sharpie?"
I blushed. It had been me. It was Tanner's Sharpie.
"You saw that?"
"It says 'Miss Nixk is hot' over twenty times in bright pink sharpie."
Technically, it was only nineteen. I supposed it was a bit obvious though.
"Yeah, that was me," I told her.
"I figured it wasn't Kris."
"He was kind of mad at me for that."
"I would think so. Anyway, you should go back to your room."
I didn't want to. I wanted to stay right there on Katie's bed.
I wasn't sure what to say. She lifted herself up off the bed and stood up. I watched as she straightened her bathing suit. Her ass was hanging out a little. I wanted to smack it. I didn't. That wouldn't be appropriate.
Not that looking at her ass was. Appropriate, I mean. None of this was really.
I got up off the bed as she walked into the bathroom with a plastic bag. She put my clothes in it and handed the bag to me.
"Go back to your room," she told me. I nodded as I told the bag. It was heavy, probably because it had wet jeans in it.
"It's getting cold in here," she said. "I need to put some clothes on."
I nodded and left reluctantly. I didn't want to . I wanted to stay there.
I had to remind myself, though, that just because Katie wasn't opposed to dating girls didn't mean there was anything going on. She was still a teacher. She was still the same Katie Nikx that she was earlier that morning. She wasn't a different person just because I'd learned something new about he and watched television with her.
I walked slowly back to my own room. I knocked on the door because I didn't bring my key with me.
I heard movement inside and then Scarlet opened the door.
She looked me up and down.
Scarlet is a sophomore. She's a year younger than me. She's almost a foot taller than me though. Scarlet is tall and so skinny that a lot of people think she's anorexic. She isn't. Her skin is very tan even though she doesn't spend that much time outside. Her hair is long and dark. Her eyes are brown. I've always thought she looks foreign. I'm not sure where she's from. That isn't really relevant though.
"Where have you been and who the hell do those clothes belong to? What happened to yours?"
"I jumped in a pool," I told her. I didn't want to tell her about Katie.
Scarlet gossips sometimes. Well, a lot of the time actually.
"So who's clothes are those?" she asked.
I didn't answer. I went into the bathroom and hung the clothes on the shower rod. I left the bag on the counter and went back into the main room.
I sat on the bed. The one closer to the door. Katie's had been the one by the window. Scarlet had claimed that one first. I didn't really mind. I never really liked sleeping by window's anyway. I'm not sure why.
The TV was on and playing some game show. I didn't watch it. I picked up my phone from the nightstand where I had left it. It is a purple phone. I like it.
I had two new messages. One was from my mom, asking about the trip. I sent her a quick short answer back. The other was from Kris wondering where I went. I decided to be honest with him. I told him I'd been in Katie's room, watching SVU.
When he texted back he seemed confused. He seems confused fairly often. He told me Mike wanted me to meet them out by the tennis courts.
I agreed because there wasn't anything better to do and because it's usually a good idea to listen to Mike. He had a very commanding way about him. I put my phone in my pocket and told Scarlet where I was going before I put on my shoes and left.
Scarlet just nodded and focused on her TV show.
I walked around the building and over to the tennis courts. My jeans were falling down. Probably because they weren't mine. They were Katie's and they were much too big for me. Her hips are much bigger than mine. I'm a very petite person. I had to hold them up as I walked. I was a little surprised that Scarlet didn't have anything to say when I was going to meet Mike. She has never really liked Mike. Sometimes I think they hate each other so much that they're going to end up together. I don't think Scarlet likes that idea. I don't think Mike would mind though.
Anyways, Mike was sitting in a tree behind the tennis court. Tanner was on a branch on the other side of the tree. Robbie and Kris were sitting on the ground. I sat down next to Kris, careful not to get Katie's jeans dirty.
Mike looked down at me. I looked up at him.
"Who's clothes are those?" he asked.
"Miss Nixk," I answered. I was careful not to call her Katie anywhere except my head.
Mike looked at me.
"Why are you wearing her clothes?"
"I didn't have anything to wear because mine were wet. She offered," I explained.
Mike considered this and then nodded.
"Where have you been?" he asked.
"In her room," I said.
I didn't really want to tell him. I can't lie to Mike though. I've never been able to. I don't know why I can't. It always seems like he knows when you are lying.
"What were you doing?" he asked. Actually, it sounded more like a demand. That's what Mike sounds like though.
"Watching SVU," I said.
He raised an eyebrow.
I shrugged. I wasn't entirely certain why.
It hadn't seemed like an important question at the time. The whole bikini thing had probably influenced that.
"How do you not know?" demanded Mike.
Everyone else was being silent. They were watching Mike's face, well except for Tanner. He was looking at a leaf.
"There wasn't really a reason," I said. "It was a good episode."
I didn't know if Mike knew about my crush on Katie. Sometimes, I just assume he did. Sometimes I assume he doesn't.
That's why I don't like to assume. I don't know what I'm supposed to be assuming.
The truth was I didn't really remember the first episode. Except that it had Alex, not Casey. And that Katie watched Alex. Almost all SVU episodes are good episodes though so it wasn't a lie.
Mike looked at me.
"There is something you aren't telling me," he concluded.
He was right. As always. Mike isn't as dumb as people think he is.
I didn't say anything.
"Kaycie," said Mike.
I didn't say anything.
"Kaycie, you are hiding something," he stated.
"I know," I said. I glanced around. "It's no big deal."
He considered this.
"I don't believe you," he said. "But okay."
I was relieved. I didn't want to tell him. I don't even know what I didn't want to tell him. I just didn't.
I don't like not knowing. I really don't.
Conversation became lighter after that. Mike lost his demanding look for just a little while. That's the real Mike. The Mike few people know. See, that's the Mike that Tanner met years ago when they were really little.
The Mike we all met. Well, except me. That wasn't the Mike that I met. I met the Mike that everyone else knows. I met him in Katie's class. He spent a lot of time flirting with me until I told him I was a lesbian.
It was the first time I came out to anyone. It wasn't really the way I wanted that to happen. That doesn't matter now though.
We joked around and it started to get dark. We didn't leave. We were supposed to be in our rooms at eleven, but Mike never follows the rules and none of us knew what time it was anyway.
We'd been out there for awhile when a shadowy figure approached from the building.
Mike noticed it. I noticed it too, but I don't think the others did.
It doesn't really matter if they did or not.
The figure was Katie. I recognized her first. She wasn't wearing her bikini anymore. She had changed into a pair of blue pajama pants and a black tank top. Her hair was up in a messy bun. She normally only did that after it had been curled. It hadn't been curled earlier.
"Boys," she said as she got closer to us. Her eyes glanced at me and she didn't bother to correct herself. I didn't correct her either.
Mike looked at her and everyone else fell silent.
"You aren't supposed to be out of your rooms. It's eleven eleven."
"Make a wish," I said and I made a wish.
Katie just glanced at me again.
"We didn't know what time it was," said Tanner as he hopped out of the tree. He was still wearing his swim trunks. They were hot pink. They boys scattered back to their room with Mike following more slowly behind them.
I glanced at Katie and started walking too. She caught up to me.
"It wasn't very smart to be out of your room where a teacher can see you," she said.
She had a point.
"I didn't know how late it was," I said. It was true. I hadn't bothered to look at my phone. I didn't know what time it was. I assumed it was after eleven though.
"I know," said Katie. We walked more slowly.
I wasn't sure what to say so I didn't say anything at all.
"So, Kaycie, tell me how did you come to be friends with Mike? You seem to hate him freshman year."
"I didn't hate him. I just didn't like him. There's a difference."
"I just got to know him," I said. It was true. I had.
"And he's a better person than he seems to be?"
"He is," I told her. "A much better person."
We walked in silence for awhile. It seemed like we were walking for longer than it had taken to get out to the areas behind the tennis courts.
Were we even walking in the right direction?
I didn't know. I looked around. It seemed like we ere. There were buildings all around.
I watched Katie. She seemed a little less full of energy than normal. Maybe she was tired. She didn't really look tired though. I'm not sure I've ever seen Katie look tired.
She started to sing under her breath a little as we walked. I smiled a little. She sings all the time. She isn't the world's best singer though. I've never minded listening to it.
If she wants to sing let er sing. It's good that she still sings even though she isn't good at it. It shows she doesn't care.
I didn't say anything. There wasn't really anything for me to say.
She stopped singing suddenly.
"Kaycie," she said. It sounded like it should be followed up with something else, but she didn't say anything else.
I looked at her at the sound of my name and then I didn't look away. She looked down at the ground for a moment.
I waited for her to speak and we kept walking.
"Kaycie," she said again and she looked at me. I looked back at her. "Have you ever dated a girl? Other than Tasha?"
"Me and Tasha never really dated," I told her. "It was more of an experimenting type thing."
"Yes. I've had a girlfriend before, but it didn't really work out."
"Why not?" asked Katie. I wondered why she was so curious about this.
There hadn't really been a reason. It just hadn't worked.
"I'm not really sure. It just didn't."
"I know what you mean. Sometimes things just don't work."
I agreed with that.
"What about you?" I asked her.
She didn't say anything for a minute. Then she spoke.
"I experimented in college," she said. "I haven't really had that much time since then."
"How far did you go in college?" I asked.
I knew it wasn't really an appropriate question to ask. She was a teacher after all. I asked it anyway though.
Katie considered this for a minute.
"I shouldn't have asked. Sorry," I said quickly.
She shook her head.
"It's fine," she said. "I don't mind answering. I was just thinking about how to answer that. I don't entirely know. It wasn't as far as I would have liked, but far enough that it couldn't be considered innocent," she said.
That made sense to me. I understood what she was trying to say.
"Why didn't you go further?" I asked curiously.
"I don't really know. I always wanted to."
It didn't feel as awkward as it should have, having this conversation with Katie. I wasn't sure why it wasn't though.
My thoughts by this point were going places they really shouldn't be. I, of course, was thinking about helping her go further.
"Do you still want to?" I asked.
She watched her feet for a minute.
"Yes," she said. "I most definitely do."
I nodded. That was interesting to know. It really was.
We finally ended up outside my room. I didn't go inside though. I didn't want the conversation to end. I liked it. It seemed like it might go somewhere. Not that it was supposed to.
"You should probably go back inside," she said. "You were supposed to be in your room a long time ago."
I nodded, but I didn't move to go back inside. I didn't want to.
"How far have you gone with a girl?" asked Katie.
"Not far enough," I told her. I couldn't believe she had actually asked. I mean I had kind of expected it was coming, but I didn't think she would actually ask me. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Katie nodded. I leaned back against the door and looked at her.
She looked absolutely beautiful, standing there in her pajamas. I really really wanted to kiss her. I really did.
I didn't do it. I really wanted to though. I knew it wasn't appropriate to think things like that, much less do them.
I snapped back into reality to find Katie looking at me curiously.
"What are you thinking about?" she asked me.
I couldn't tell her that I was thinking about kissing her.
"Nothing," I lied. I didn't like lying to her. I don't like lying at all. I don it though. Sometimes I just can't help myself.
She nodded. She knew it was a lie. I knew she knew it.
I was watching her eyes. They were looking at me. There was a look in them. I can't describe it. I don't know why, but I just can't describe it.
I liked the look though. There was something sexy about it.
She took a step closer to me and oh my god. She was closer than she had been earlier. I liked it. She played with her hands nervously. That is one of her nervous habits. She has a few of them. I've noticed she bites her nails sometimes too.
I'm digressing again.
It almost seemed like she was about to kiss me. Then a door opened and she jumped back. Another chaperone came outside. Katie glanced at her.
"I was just going back inside," I mumbled and ducted back in the room. Scarlet was still sitting on the bed watching a game show.
"You were supposed to be back forty minutes ago," she said without looking at me.
"I know," I said and sat down on my bed.
"You're going to get in trouble," she said with a sing song voice.
"Am not," I said. "I was with a teacher."
Scarlet looked at me. She had a confused look on her face. It's a look often found on Scarlet's face.
"Why?" she asked as I plugged in my cell phone. I charge it a lot. I'm paranoid about it dying.
"No reason," I said.
I didn't really mind lying to Scarlet. She's a gossip. She's my friend though so I always feel a little bad.
"Who?" asked Scarlet.
"Miss Nixk," I told her. I didn't have anything to hide.
"Why?" she asked.
"She came to yell at us for being out after eleven,"I said. "Then she walked me back here."
"She yelled at you guys almost a half hour ago," said Scarlet.
"How would you know?" I asked. There was no way she could know that.
"Mike got back to his room a half hour ago," she said.
I glanced at her with a look of surprised. Mike and Scarlet hated each other.
"How do you know that?" I asked.
"He texted me. Wanted me to talk to you about Miss Nixk. I told him to fuck off."
"Why does he have your number?" I asked.
"How should I know?" she said as she turned back to the TV.
"It is your number and you and Mike don't exactly get along."
"Yeah, but we do have to talk in order to not get along."
These kinds of comments are the ones that make me think Scarlet and Mike are in love with each other.
I told her she had a point.
"So, not because Mike told me to, but is there something going on with you and that teacher lady?"
"No," I said. There wasn't. There couldn't be. She was a teacher, like Scarlet had said. Even if there was something going on, I wouldn't tell Scarlet.
"Whatever, Kaycie," she said with a yawn.
I leaned back on the pillows. It wasn't long before Scarlet fell asleep. I turned the TV with the remote and rolled over in the bed. I was still wearing Katie's clothes. They smelled like her. Not that I get close enough to smell her. Honestly.
I looked down at the skirt. I t was an overly Katie shirt. She was a kid at heart and what kid doesn't like Mickey Mouse?
I wondered when I would have to give it back. I didn't want to give it back. I liked wearing her Mickey Mouse shirt.
I doubted my clothes would be dry the next day. I would have to wear hers again.
I smiled. I liked that idea.
I wondered if any of it meant anything at all. I wasn't sure. She had let me stay in her room all day. Insisted even. She had lent me clothes. She had told me she wasn't straight.
If she hadn't been eleven years older I would have assumed she was interested. Not that I assumed. I would have predicted she was.
She was twenty seven and she was a teacher.
But before the other chaperone came out, she had really seemed like shew as going to kiss me.
Was that possible?
Was it possible that Katie would have kissed me if that woman hadn't come out of her room?
It didn't seem right.
It didn't make sense.
Was it just wishful thinking?
It had to be wishful thinking. There is no way that Katie Nixk would kiss me.
I shook my head. I turned out the light and got under the covers. I fell asleep to thoughts of Katie. I dreamed about her. I do that all the time.
I woke up the next morning to someone banging on the door. Scarlet was still sound asleep. I pulled myself out of bed. I yawned a few times on my way over to the door.
It was probably someone coming to wake us up.
I opened the door and there was Katie. She was wearing the same pajamas that she had been wearing the night before. Her hair was down and it looked messy. She looked tired.
"Good morning," she greeted. Her voice was still peppy. "Just making sure you are awake."
"I am," said glancing back at Scarlet.
"Make sure she gets up," said Katie nodding at Scarlet.
She glanced at my clothes.
"If you want to borrow something else to wear you can," she offered.
"Sure," I said with a smile.
"Alright, I'll be back when I'm done making sure people are up. It shouldn't be that long."
I nodded and shut the door as she knocked on the next one.
I turned the TV on to the news. I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth and all that. Then I woke Scarlet up.
She groaned at me and pulled the blanket over her head.
"Scarlet, wake up. It's time to wake up," I said loudly, shaking her.
She groaned at me.
I kept shaking her.
"Scarlet, get up or I'm throwing your make up in the pool."
Scarlet sat up immediately. I laughed.
"That was not funny," she said.
"I thought it was," I said, still laughing.
Scarlet got out of bed reluctantly and wandered into the bathroom.
I yawned and sat down on my bed.
There wasn't took much I could do until Katie came back.
Unlike Scarlet I don't spend an hour putting on make up.
I don't even wear make up. I only wear it for special occasions. Like great grandma's 100th birthday. That was the last time I wore make up.
Well, that's not true. I wore make up for Great Grandma's funeral too. That was a month later.
Anyways, I didn't have anything to do. I made sure all of my stuff was in my bag and then I watched the morning news.
Scarlet took forever n the bathroom. It didn't bother me though. That's how Scarlet worked. She always does that.
Anyways, Scarlet was in the bathroom taking a shower when there was a knock on the door.
I jumped up and answered it quickly. Katie was there as I expected. She smiled at me and I smiled back.
"I assume your clothes aren't dry?" she asked.
I shook my head.
"Nope, Scarlet got them all wet anyway," I said. I had forgotten to take them out of the bathroom.
"Alright, let's see what we can go find."
I nodded and turned to bang on the bathroom door. Scarlet stuck her head out.
"Scarlet, I'll be back. If they come to check us out before I do grab my clothes, will you?"
I followed Katie out. She was till wearing her pajamas. She had put her hair up though so it didn't look as messy as it had before.
We went into her hotel room. She fiddled around with the key for a minute.
She opened the door and we went in.
She went over to her suitcase and began pulling out clothes.
The floor was covered with clothes before she found something she deemed suitable for me to wear. She tossed them at me and told me to go get changed in the bathroom. They were a slightly smaller pair of jeans and a tee-shirt. The tee-shirt had Tinkerbell on it. Katie likes the story of Peter Pan. We watched Finding Neverland freshman year.
I did as told.
I changed rather quickly and left the bathroom.
Katie was standing there, buttoning the buttons on her dark jeans. She wasn't wearing a shirt. At all.
I couldn't help myself. I stared. She looked absolutely positively amazing.
It had to be a dream. I was standing there and Katie wasn't wearing a shirt.
I watched as she picked up a beige bra from the bed and put it on. I watched as she pulled her shirt over her head.
She wasn't graceful like she would be in the movies. She is a clumsy person in general.
I like clumsy people. She pulled the shirt over her head. It was a black tank top. She shook her head to fix her hair. It was down again.
She looked at it in the mirror. She saw me standing there. She turned around quickly.
"How long have you been standing there?" she demanded. She didn't sound angry.
"A minute or so," I said. I was sure my face was bright red.
Her face was pink. It is fairly often. I think it's because she's so energetic. I like her energy.
I'm digressing again. Maybe it's a nervous habit because I was so goddamn nervous right at that moment.
"I thought I heard the bathroom door open," she said. She didn't seem bothered at all.
My face just got redder.
She looked at me and smiled.
"I'm going to take the colour of your face to mean that you came in before I put my shirt on."
I nodded mutely. I didn't trust myself to speak right then.
"I take it you enjoyed what you saw?" she asked.
I nodded again.
"I assumed so. There is no need to be so embarrassed."
"There isn't?" I asked.
"No, I mean we both know that you think I'm hot. I would assume you would enjoy seeing me with no shirt on."
She said it as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Maybe it was.
I didn't say anything.
She smiled at me and grabbed her hair brush off the bed. I stood there, leaning against the wall, and watched her. She didn't seem to mind.
She glanced at the clock.
"Wanna help me pack up some of my stuff?" she asked.
I nodded and pushed myself off the wall. I picked up a few shirt from the floor and put them in her bag.
She put her hair brush down on the table. It wasn't too long before her bag was all packed up. She sat down on her bed and fell back.
I stood there awkwardly.
"Make yourself comfortable, Kaycie. You don't have to leave yet, unless you want to."
"I don't," I said and I sat down on the bed, near her head.
She smiled and looked at me. I'm sure I must have been at a weird angle.
She was just starting to say something when my phone went off. I looked at the caller ID and answered it with an apologetic smile at Katie.
It was Mike.
"What do you want?" I asked instead of a greeting.
He sounded surprised.
"Whoa, am I interrupting something?"
"Yes," I said.
"What am I interrupting?" he asked.
"Uh," I said.
"Were you lying to me?" he asked.
"No," I said. "You are interrupting something."
"You are being stubborn. Let me in, I'm outside your room."
"I'm not in my room," I told him.
"Why not? Is Scarlet with you?"
"She should be in the room," I said. "She's probably still in the shower."
"Of course she is," he said. "Where are you?"
"Miss Nikx's room," I said with a glance at her. It was clear that she was listening.
"Why?" he demanded.
"I'm borrowing some clothes because mine are still wet."
"You are still hiding something from me, Smith. I expect you to tell me later. At breakfast, which is in about fifteen minutes," he said and then he hung up. I put the phone down. Katie sat up and swung herself so that she was sitting next to me.
"Who was that?" she asked curiously. She's a curious person.
"Mike," I told her. "He wanted to know where I was."
"He was checking up on you?"
"He's outside my room," I said.
"You should go then," she said. Her voice sounded sad. I didn't want to leave.
I shook my head.
"It doesn't matter. I'll see him at breakfast."
She looked at me.
"Are you avoiding him?" she asked.
"How did you know?"
"You are rather readable. Why are you avoiding him?"
"He'll ask me questions that I don't want to answer," I said. "He's suspicious because I spent so much time in here yesterday."
"That makes sense. You did spend a lot of time with me yesterday."
"I know," I said.
"Does Mike know you have a crush on me?"
"I have no idea."
We sat there in silence for a moment. Katie looked like there was something she wanted to say, but she wasn't saying it. I wondered why. I wondered what she could possible want to say to me.
"Kaycie? Can you keep a secret?"
"Yes," I said. I'm good at keeping secrets.
She nodded, but didn't explain why she'd asked. I didn't ask.
She didn't say anything more, but she glanced at the clock. I didn't.
"You should probably go back to your room," she said. Her voice sounded sad. I wondered if she liked me being there.
"I don't want to go back there," I said. "My bag is packed already. I don't need to."
She didn't say anything. She glanced at the clock again. It was almost time to go to breakfast. Her hand moved a little and touched mine.
Oh my god. Katie's hand was on mine.
What the hell was going on? Was someone playing some kind of cruel joke? Was it Mike?
This couldn't be really happening.
There was a look in her eyes. It was the same look that had been there the night before, when we were standing outside my room. The one that had made me think she was going to kiss me.
It was making me think that again.
This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be happening.
This had to be a dream. There was no way that Katie Nixk would be looking at me like that. It simply didn't happen. People like Katie Nixk don't risk their careers for people like me. It just don't work like that.
But the look was there. I wanted to pinch myself to see if I was dreaming. I didn't though. Katie looked nervous and I wondered if she was actually going to kiss me. Why would she though? And why the hell would she be nervous about it?
She was the one that everyone, except Kris, liked. She was the one that everyone at Quelah High, except for gay guys and Kris, would die to even be close to.
Then she was leaning in and I wasn't thinking straight anymore. No pun intended. I wasn't thinking well enough for puns.
The her lips hit mine. I was in shock, but I kissed back without even thinking about it. I couldn't believe that Katie Nixk was actually kissing me. I couldn't believe I was actually kissing a teacher. Much less Katie.
Her lips were soft. Her hands made there way to my neck and they pulled me closer to her. I moved closer willingly.
I really really really hoped it wasn't a dream. I really did. It wasn't a dream.
I was really kissing Katie. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Somehow my hands ended up on the back of her neck, running through her hair. I don't remember how they got there. I guess I moved them there. I was in heaven. Her hair was so soft. And then her tongue was in my mouth and my tongue was in hers.
Usually kissing wasn't my favorite activity, but oh my god. This was amazing. It really really really was.
And then she pulled away. Her face was the reddest I've ever seen it. She looked at me for a minute. I was grinning. I was still in shock, but I swear to god I was grinning like a fool. I had just kissed Katie Nixk. Oh My god.
I kind of expected her to run. I don't know why. I didn't let go of her though. She leaned in again and she kissed me a second time.
I swear to god I was in heaven.
Her tongue was in my mouth again. I didn't want it to ever leave. She pulled away quicker this time. She looked down.
"Shit," she said. I've never heard her curse before. "That should not have happened."
"I liked it," I said. She was right though, it shouldn't have happened and we both knew it.
She smiled a little. It was a kind of sad smile.
"So did I," she said. "But it can't happen again. I could lose my job and it just can't happen again."
I nodded sadly because I knew she was right.
We didn't move for a second.
"Aw fuck it," she said and she kissed me again. She pulled me closer to her. It didn't last as long as the first one, but it was just as amazing.
"Go to breakfast," she told me. "You don't need Mike wondering where you are."
I nodded, but didn't move.
As I walked to breakfast I was still in shock.
Katie Nixk had kissed me. Three times. Oh my god.
I got myself a bowl of fruit loops and went over to the boys table.
Mike looked at me.
"You're late," he said.
"I know," I said. I'm sure I was still grinning. Katie Nixk had kissed me.
He raised an eyebrow at me.
"What the hell happened to you?" he asked.
I didn't want to tell him.
I wasn't going to tell him.
I can't lie to Mike, but I wasn't about to tell him this. Katie could get in so much trouble.
I ate a spoonful of cereal.
We were sitting in a booth.
Mike was in the middle on one side, the side closer to the wall. Three people were squeezed on to each side.
Tanner was in the corner. Scarlet was on Mike's other side and she didn't look too thrilled to be there. Kris was across from Tanner and Robbie was next to him. I was sitting next to Robbie.
Mike was watching my every move. I knew what he wanted to know and I wasn't going to tell him.
I kept shoveling fruit loops into my mouth.
"Kaycie," said Mike. "Stop stuffing your face."
"Damn that girl can eat," said Robbie with a whistle.
I resisted the urge to slap him on the back of the head. That didn't always go over well with Mike.
"Robbie, shut up," said Mike sharply before turning to me. "We're taking a walk, Smith. You need to go get your bag."
I didn't want to.
I got up from the booth though. Scarlet sighed as she let Mike out.
He slapped her ass as she walked out. I chose to ignore it.
He didn't say anything until we were out of the building.
"There is something going on between you and Miss Nixk," he stated.
I said nothing. He was right. I wasn't telling him that though.
"I know you," he said. "Silence means you don't want to tell me that I'm right."
Sometimes I forget how well Mike can read me.
"I can't say anything," I said.
"I won't push it," he said. "Don't get yourself into trouble, Kayce. Don't do anything dumb, that's what us guys are for."
I smiled and told him I wouldn't.
The side of Mike that wasn't mad at me was the side of Mike that I knew.
The side of Mike that had slapped Scarlet's ass was the side everyone thought they knew.
"I just have one question," he said.
I indicated that he should ask.
"Are you in love with her?"
I wasn't sure. I honestly wasn't.
"I don't know," I said. "I think that it would be really really easy for me to fall in love with her."
He nodded. We went back to breakfast without getting my bag.
His question stuck in my mind. Did I love her?
I knew, and know, that loving her would be a really bad idea.
I didn't know the answer though. I honestly didn't. I wasn't sure how I liked that.
I don't like not knowing things.
No one at the table asked about where me and Mike went. They never did. You don't ask when it comes to Mike. Unless you're Tanner. Tanner didn't ask though. He could have gotten away with it though. I've never seen Mike get mad at Tanner. I'm sure it has happened at least once, but probably not more than that.
Anyways, I'm digressing again.
Robbie and Kris were talking about what we were doing that day. It was Saturday. We had gotten there the day before. We were going on the actual whale watch today.
I couldn't wait. I love animals. I always have and I'm pretty sure that I always will.
I especially like dolphins. They are my favorite.
I really hoped we would see some that day. We did.
Anyway, it was a half hour bus ride to the place where the kept the boat. We all crowded into the buses after breakfast. I was on the same bus as Katie, as well as the boys and Scarlet.
I sat one row behind her on the other side. Katie I mean. The teachers sat in the first few rows. She was sitting on the outside so was I. I hadn't been before. Mike and Tanner were sitting behind me. Kris was sitting next to me. Scarlet wasn't thrilled that she got stuck sitting next to Robbie. She didn't really like him.
Sometimes I wonder why Scarlet bothers to hang out with us. Then I remember my idea that she's in love with Mike. Who knows if that's really true. I think it is.
Anyways, I sat there and I watched her. I must have looked like a creeper because Kris leaned over and whispered in my ear.
"Dude, tone down the crepperness, she's gonna notice you and I'm going to end up blamed for it."
I smiled a little. He gets blamed for things I do a lot.
"Relax," I said without bothering to whisper. "I don't care if she does."
He gave me a look.
I ignored it. I spent most of the bus ride staring at her and absentmindedly doodling on my jeans. I do that all the time. My parents don't really like it. It probably isn't the best habit in the world, but I'm not doing drugs or anything. That's good for something.
Anyway, we got off the bus once we got there. My marine bio teacher went over a whole bunch of rules and we all pretended to listen. Then we got on the bus and waited for it to move. Mike decided we should go up to the top deck so we did. We all squeezed in on the benches in the corner. Tanner sat in the corner and Mike sat next to him. Scarlet sat next to Mike and didn't look thrilled to be there.
I sat on the one that wasn't on the edge of the boat. Kris and Robbie sat next to me. There was an empty seat on the other side of me.
It wasn't long before the boat started moving. I hadn't seen Katie since we had gotten on the boat. I was kind of wondering where she had gotten to. Maybe she stayed on the lower deck.
I forgot about it for awhile. I joked around with the boys. I laughed with Mike. I watched him and Scarlet secretly look at each other when they thought no one was looking.
Then the boat lurched. Someone fell into me. Someone who had been standing next to my seat. I hadn't noticed them.
I looked down at my lap to see Katie's head there. I was surprised. I hadn't seen her come up there.
"Hey, Kaycie," she said as she sat up and straightened out her hair. "Sorry about that."
"It's okay," I said. Mike was looking at me. I shivered a little. It was cold out.
"You look cold," she said. "I have an extra sweatshirt if you want to borrow it."
I glanced down and nodded. She stood up and held out her hand to help me up. I took it and stood. I didn't look back as we went to the lower deck. I almost fell going to down the ladder and she caught me.
"Sorry about that," I said.
"It's okay," she said. I smiled a little.
I kind of expected talking to her to be a little more awkward than it was. It wasn't really that awkward. She led me into the little cafe area and down a flight of hidden stairs. I didn't even know those were there. My teacher hadn't mentioned that in her description of the boat. Katie noticed my look of confusion.
"They didn't really want random people down here," she explained. "So they didn't mention it. I put my bag down here though because Coleen said I could."
Coleen was my teacher's first name.
I nodded. We were in an empty room now. There was a small bench where Katie's bag was.
She went over to it and dug out a sweatshirt. She had two over top of her tank top. She still looked gorgeous. She handed me a purple sweatshirt. It had Tinkerbell on it. She likes the story of Peter Pan. I smiled and pulled it on.
"Thanks," I said.
"It's no problem. I over pack," she said.
"I can tell," I said. It was rather obvious.
"Lending you that wasn't the only reason I brought you down here," she told me quietly. She sounded a little nervous.
"It isn't?" I asked. My breath caught in my throat. What was she going to say?
She shook her head.
"See, ever since you left my room this morning, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you."
Could she be saying what I think she was? God, I hoped so.
"Really?" I asked.
She nodded and took a step closer to me.
"Yes," she said. "I haven't stopped thinking about how much I want to kiss you again. If you want, that is."
"I do," I said. She smiled at me.
"Good," she said with a grin.
I was standing against a wall and she took another step closer to me. I was almost pinned against the wall and I liked it.
Her hands found my hips. Her mouth was inches away from mine.
"I really shouldn't do this," she whispered before she put her lips to mine.
Her lips were cold this time, possibly because of the cold temperatures outside. My lips were tingling. My whole body was on fire.
My hands found the back of her neck and I pulled her even closer.
She was warm. One of her hands moved from my hip and under her Tinkerbell tee shirt.
Katie Nixk had her hand under my shirt. Oh My god.
It was much too much to try to understand so I didn't. I was too caught up in the kiss to think.
I didn't want to think.
Katie's face was red when she pulled away for air.
"we really shouldn't do this here," she said. "We could get caught."
There was something exciting about the fact that we were doing something we weren't supposed to be.
I liked it.
"You're probably right."
"God, I want to kiss you again. I really do. I can't though."
I knew she was right. I really wanted her to kiss me though. Even if it wasn't right.
She moved away from me.
I didn't want her too.
"Go back upstairs," she told me. "I don't want to be tempted to do something stupid."
I nodded and turned to go. She pulled me back and kissed me again.
"When we get to the hotel tonight, after dinner, meet me in my room," she said softly. "Don't tell anyone."
I nodded and went back upstairs. My pants were falling down because they didn't fit right. I held them up and made my way to the top deck. I slid into the seat next to Robbie. Mike raised his eye brow at me.
"Where have you been?" he asked me. Well, demanded.
"I was getting a sweatshirt," I said. It wasn't a lie. I had been. That was the purpose for going down there.
"Tinkerbell, really Kaycie?" asked Tanner with a laugh. Tanner loves Tinkerbell.
"It's not like I really get a choice of clothes," I said. "I kind of did jump in the pool in mine."
"I bet you love wearing her clothes," teased Kris. I glared at him. He, of course, was right. It might just be the first time in his life.
Mike raised an eyebrow at him.
"He does have a point," said Robbie. "Ooh Kaycie likes the teacher."
I rolled my eyes.
"Are you stupid?" asked Kris. "That's been going on for like a year."
Mike gave me a look. I probably should have told him about it earlier. He doesn't like it when people don't tell him things.
"I don't blame her," said Tanner, ignoring Mike's expression. He's one of the few people who can get away with that. "That teacher is hot."
Everyone stared at him.
"You're gay," said Mike.
"And? She's still hot. Just because I wouldn't sleep with her, doesn't mean she isn't hot."
"Kaycie would," said Kris.
"Shut up," I mumbled. I'm sure my face was bright red.
"Are we sure Kaycie hasn't already?" asked Scarlet. She had that look in her eyes. The look she had when she gets to taunt someone.
"Kaycie hasn't," I said.
"So why are you spending so much time in her room?" asked Scarlet.
"We were watching TV," I said.
"And took forever to get a sweatshirt," added Robbie.
My face got redder.
"Is there something going on?" demanded Mike.
I didn't know what to say. I just sat there and blushed. I couldn't tell even if they already knew. I didn't want Katie to get in trouble.
"What were you two doing down there, Kayce. You go girl," he cheered.
Mike have him a look. Robbie didn't get this.
"Plotting to gang rape you," I told him.
Tanner seemed to find this hilarious and he started to crack up.
I waited until he stopped.
"Guys, seriously don't tell anyone about this at all. I don't want her to get in any trouble."
"So there is something going on," said Mike.
I barely nodded. Mike saw though. He nodded back.
"Well, she is hot," he agreed.
Mike thought I like her because she's hot. I knew they wouldn't get it. I'm not a shallow person. I don't like Katie for just her looks. I like her energy. I like her personality.
I like the fact that people mistake her for a student all the time.
I like the way she smiles.
I don't bother to explain it. It didn't seem like something I should explain.
Making out with the hot young English teacher was one thing.
Falling in love with her was a completely different thing.
Did I really just think that?
Oh my god.
I pushed it out of my mind. Now was not the time for that.
Someone spotted a whale and that was the end of that.
I went downstairs and watched from the front of the boat. Mike came down with me. I was glad for the loud noise of the boat, Mike couldn't ask questions.
Then Katie appeared by my side. She didn't say anything and neither did I. Mike looked at her suspiciously. I ignored him.
We listened to the lady with the microphone telling us all about the different whales.
None of us said anything.
Katie was the first to speak. She was looking out at the ocean excitedly and pointing to something.
"Did you see that?" she asked excitedly.
"What?" I asked squinting. I didn't see anything.
"A dolphin," she said, standing on her toes to see better.
I squinted again. I saw them now. They were closer.
The announcer lady had noticed them too.
She was talking about them.
Katie was still looking at the dolphins excitedly.
I liked that expression on her face.
I was excited too. The dolphins had come right up next to the boat.
They were almost underneath it. I hadn't been that close to a dolphin in years.
I used to see them all the time at the beach, when I went to see Great Grandma. We haven't gone there since she died. That was a few years back.
I'm digressing again. I really should stop doing that.
Katie was almost jumping up and down with excitement.
I watched her with one eye and the dolphins with the other.
She looked like a kid in a candy shop. Or her in a candy shop. She likes candy, I think she'd act the same way. She's like a big kid. She really is.
She glanced over at me and I smiled at her. She smiled back. My hands were grabbing the railing. Her hands were too. People were crowding together to get a better view. Mike and Katie kept getting pushed into me. I didn't mind Katie so much. I kind of liked it.
Her hand lost it's grip for a second and reattached itself a little closer to mine. I held on tighter. The wind was strong. I'm a small person.
I kept almost blowing away.
Katie noticed. She grabbed onto my sweatshirt to keep me in place.
I blushed a little and she smiled at me.
"You okay?" she asked me.
"You can hold on to me if you want," she said. I looked around and carefully moved one of my hands to her sweatshirt. She let go of me and let me hold on to her.
I smiled and so did she.
Mike just looked at us.
It was still cold on the boat. I shivered a little. Katie glanced at me.
"Are you cold?" she asked.
She pulled me a little closer to her.
"Do you want to go downstairs? It's warmer down there."
I shook my head. As much as I wanted to be alone in the warmth with Katie, I knew it was a bad idea. Plus I'd come on this trip for the whale watch, I wasn't about to miss it.
She nodded and turned back to the ocean.
We saw a few more whales before the boat turned back to shore. The crowd scattered about as the boat picked up speed.
Mike went back upstairs with a glance at me.
Me and Katie stayed put. I kept holding on to her because the boat was going faster and the wind was getting stronger as a result.
I was more likely to blow away now.
After I had almost fallen over a few times we decided to move away from the railing.
I shivered a little.
"It's warmer inside," said Katie. I followed her to the place we'd been before.
She was right. It was warmer down there.
"What was with the looks Mike was giving me?" she asked.
Shit. I was hoping she hadn't noticed those.
"He kind of guessed that there was something going on. And I kind of can't lie to Mike," I admitted.
"Shit," she said, echoing my thoughts.
"He won't say anything."
"Does anyone else know?" she asked. She sounded worried. I thought she might be angry, but she didn't sound like she was.
"I think the boys and Scarlet kind of assume. Then again Scarlet assumes a lot of stuff, most of which isn't true. I doubt they take it seriously. They probably just think I have a crush on you."
"This wasn't supposed to happen. Can you make sure none of them will say anything?"
"Alright, do that. Before you come to my hotel room tonight."
I was a little surprised that she still expected me to go to her hotel room though.
I didn't question it though because I didn't want her to change her mind.
We stayed down there for most of the ride back.
Mike sat next to me on the bus ride to the hotel.
I was still wearing Katie's Tinkerbell sweatshirt.
"So, Kayce, what exactly is going on?" he asked softly.
"If I tell you will you make sure no one else thinks anything is?" I asked softly.
"Not here," I said. "I'm going to her room when we get back to the hotel. After that."
"I'll make sure they think nothing is actually going on," he promised.
"Thanks," I said. Mike always keeps his word.
"One thing though. I can't guarantee Tanner will believe me."
"Tanner won't tell," I said. "Try though."
Katie glanced back at me and I smiled at her. She smiled.
I absolutely love her smile. I always have. It's one of her best qualities.
The bus ride wasn't very long and we were at a new hotel in no time.
The chaperones handed out room assignments.
Katie handed me my room key.
"I'm in 1513," she told me. "Be there in a half hour."
I nodded. Scarlet followed me to our room, texting as she walked.
She didn't look too thrilled.
"Ugh," she muttered.
"What?" I asked.
"Mike wants me to meet him in their room. Who the fuck does he think I am? His bitch?"
I chose not to answer that.
I knew she would go regardless of her complaining.
That's how Scarlet works.
I glanced at the clock. I had twenty minutes left before I had to go meet Katie.
I wasn't sure what to do.
Scarlet left to go to Mike's room.
I was surprised that she didn't ask why I wasn't going.
Scarlet usually asks things like that.
I decided to go see Katie a little early. It had taken a few minutes for Scarlet to leave and it would take a few more to walk there. We weren't in the same building this time.
I grabbed my room key and my cell phone and left.
I got there about three minutes before I was supposed to be there.
I knocked on the door anyway.
Katie opened it right away.
I stepped inside and she closed it.
"Did you talk to them?" she asked.
"Mike is going that now. They'll listen to him," I told her.
She was the only one staying in the room and there was only one bed. It was a double bed.
We both sat on it.
She had taken off her numerous sweatshirts and was wearing jeans and her black tank top again.
It was much warmer on land than it had been on the boat.
"So," she said. "This thing, whatever it is, can't continue once we get back to school."
"I know," I said. I did know. I had known that all along.
"Hell," she said. "It shouldn't even be happening now."
"I know," I said. I was glad it was though. It was like a dream come true.
She looked at me for a long minute.
"I have a deal for you," she said.
"We have tonight. We're going back tomorrow."
I agreed with this point.
"Do you want to stay here tonight? With me?" she asked.
Of course, I did.
"Won't you get in trouble?"
Katie shook her head.
"Not of no one knows. You can stay here tonight, who knows what will happen?"
Was she saying what I think she was saying?
"There a condition. No one ever knows. Not any of your friends. Not your cat. Not your cousin in Egypt who doesn't speak English. Not Mike. If he asks you learn how to lie to him. If anyone finds out I could lose my job and get in a lot of trouble. I like my job. I need it."
"N one will ever find out," I promised. Normally I am against the principal of promises.
I knew I had to this time.
"Once we get back to the school we can never mention it again. Nothing can ever happen after tonight. No matter how much either one of us wants it to. If you see me watching you you turn away, got it?"
"Oh and no more staring at me during your math class. I'm sure your teacher doesn't appreciate it. That and it always makes we want to go over there and kiss you right there while everyone is watching," Katie admitted.
"I'll stop," I said.
"Good," she said. "Do you think you can do all that?"
I nodded. I wasn't sure, but I had to. I just had to. This was my only chance.
"I can," I said.
"Good. It's a deal then. Anything can happen tonight and nothing can happen after."
"Well, now that that's settled," she started. She moved closer to me.
I couldn't believe this was actually happening. Hell, I was still surprised that she remembered me at all. Much less noticed me watching her. I most definitely hadn't expected any of this to happen.
Oh My god.
Her hand ran along my face and I leaned into her touch.
She leaned in and she kissed me. There was something different about it. I couldn't put my finger on what it was though.
I stopped thinking about it and kissed back. We sat there and made out for awhile.
Somehow we ended up curled up on the middle of the bed. Normally I dislike cuddling. But this was Katie. Katie was different, that probably wasn't a good thing though.
We just lied there for awhile.
"Let's watch SVU," she whispered. I don't know why she was whispering.
I nodded. She grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. It was still on the same channel. That channel plays SVU reruns all the time.
It was a Casey episode that was half way through. Olivia was integrating a suspect.
Katie wasn't drooling over her this time. She didn't even seem like she was paying attention to the episode.
She was laying back with her head on the pillows and her hair was sticking out in all directions under her head. She looked so peaceful. There was a smile on her face, it wasn't her usual smile. It was much more calm.
I loved it. Hell, I still love it.
"What are you thinking about?" I whispered during a commercial break.
She didn't answer for a moment.
"You," she said. She didn't whisper. She didn't turn her head to me.
I was a little surprised. Thinking of me was what gave her that smile? Wow. I wasn't sure why. "I was thinking about how I don't know how the hell we ended up here."
I wasn't sure what to say to that.
"I honestly never thought that we would be here right now," she said.
Neither had I.
She didn't say anything more and the commercial break ended.
We sat there in silence, only the TV made a sound.
Her hand was lazily drawing circles on my hip.
I don't entirely know if she was aware she was doing it. I guess she was.
Her hand slid under the Tinkerbell tank top and sweatshirt and she continued her motions. Her eyes didn't move away from the TV. Her head turned to me during the next commercial break. She didn't say anything, just looked at me. I turned to look at her.
She smiled at me. God. I love that smile. I smiled back.
Her hand moved up along my side.
"Remember last night when we were talking about how for we'd gone' she said softly.
I'm not used to hearing her talk softly.
She didn't say anything more. Her face was more pink than usual.
I wondered what she was thinking.
Did she want to do that with me? Tonight?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
My phone rang. I cursed and pulled it out of my pocket.
I rolled off the bed.
"I have to answer," I said and I went outside.
"What do you want?" I demanded. I'm sure I sounded annoyed. I was annoyed.
I could almost see him raising his eyebrow. I couldn't actually though.
"Someone doesn't want to be bothered. Where are you?"
"None of you business."
"Does that mean that you are still with her?" he asked.
"Something like that," I said.
"Well, when are you leaving?"
"What do you mean you're not?"
"I'm not explaining it. I'll talk to you tomorrow, on the bus home, don't call me tonight," I told him.
"Kayce, don't do something you'll regret."
"I won't regret anything," I said and I hung up the phone.
Why did he have to call? Mike always makes me think about things.
Was this something I would regret later?
I shook my head.
Now wasn't the time to have doubts.
I pushed Mike out of my head and went back inside.
Katie was lying on the bed with her own cell phone against her ear.
She didn't seem to notice me.
"I'll me home tomorrow, Kenny," she was saying.
Who was Kenny?
"I miss you too, honey," she said with a soft smile.
"Okay, I gotta go now. I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight. I love you."
She hung up the phone and looked at me.
"My nephew," she explained.
"He called me, wondering when I was coming home. He's seven."
"He lives with you?"
"Yeah. I live with him and my sister."
I knew she had a sister. Heather Nixk. One child, never married.
I also knew where she lives. She doesn't have to know that part though.
She told me a little more about Kenny. There was something in her voice when she e talked about him. I can't place it, it was just there.
Kenny is a redheaded seven year old boy with a love for baseball. He plays on little league and always wears his baseball cap. He wants to be a professional baseball player when he grows up.
He sounded like a real good kid.
I told her so.
She grinned and said that he was a great kid.
There was something sad about the way she said it.
"Anyway, enough about Kenny," she decided.
I agreed with that.
She hopped off the bed with a burst of energy.
She'd been oddly calm for too long. She wasn't usually calm. She got up and turned off the TV.
"Let's dance," she said as she pulled a light green iPod out of her bag.
"Dance?" I asked cautiously.
Dancing has never really been my thing.
I see her dancing all the time though. She used to do that in class.
If she catches someone listening to an iPod, she takes it and listens to it.
She never took mine, which was probably a good thing.
She isn't the world's best dancer, but she has fun and that's all the at matters.
She scrolled through all the songs on her iPod. Her face had a rather focused look on it.
She picked a song called Maneater. I like that song.
She put one ear bud in her ear and handed me the other. She slipped the iPod into her pocket.
I put my ear bud in.
The song was already playing.
Katie grinned. She started dancing. I was hesitant, but she pulled me in.
We danced, looking completely ridiculous.
Normally, I don't like looking ridiculous. With her I didn't care one bit.
She grabbed my hand and twirled me around. The iPod cord got tangled and we ignored it.
There was a grin on her face and I couldn't look away.
Her smile mesmerized me. Her eyes were happy.
I was glad for that. I like it when she's happy.
She twirled me around again and my arm got tangled with the headphone cords.
Somehow we ended up on the floor laughing. Her hand was on my thigh and she was laughing so hard that her face was bright red. It looked absolutely adorable.
I leaned over and kissed her. She stopped laughing almost immediately and kissed back. She shifted her body so that her hand could be on my neck.
She pulled me in closer. She settled back on her knees and pulled me onto her lap. My arms wrapped around her neck.
"Kaycie, how far have you gone?" she whispered as she pulled her face away. It was still so close.
"Me and Tasha were shirtless. We never got around to anything more than that."
"What about you?" I asked.
"I had a hand down this one girls pants, but I was drunk that night. It was college. We got interrupted before I could do anything more."
"Would you have gone all the way if you hadn't been?"
"I would have. The sad thing is that I don't even know her name."
I smiled a little.
"Do you want to?" I asked. "Tonight?"
She looked at me.
"Do you?" she asked.
I paused and then I nodded. I did. I really really did.
"Let's do it," she said. She had a grin on her face again.
The iPod lay forgotten on the floor.
She kissed me again and I kissed back. Her arm snaked around my waist and we stood up together. Her arm was pushing my shirt up slightly and I liked the way it felt on my skin. My hand played with her hair. It was soft.
She pulled away slightly and looked at me. Her hands both moved to the bottom of my shirt and I had to take my hands of her neck so she could pull it off. She took the sweatshirt and shirt off at the same time.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
It was really happening. It was really happening. I wasn't dreaming. Katie Nixk really took my shirt. She wanted to have sex with me.
I was going to have sex with Katie Nixk. Oh my god.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
She tossed my shirt to the floor and slowly brought a hand up to my breast. I was still wearing her bra. It was too big on me. She slipped a hand around my body and undid the clasp. The bra fell to the floor.
Her hands ran along my chest. It tickled. I liked it. She leaned in and she kissed me again.
I'm sure my face was bright red.
I was standing there, wearing her pants and no shirt. Oh my god.
"Hey, no need to be embarrassed," she whispered. "You are very attractive."
"Take your shirt off," I said. I still felt it an inappropriate thing to say, but I decided that really didn't matter anymore.
She pulled back a little and pulled her tank top off. Her bra wasn't much more revealing than her bikini had been, but the sight still took my breath away.
She looked at my face and grinned. She took off her bra and that fell to the floor too.
Damn. She looked amazing. Her breasts are perfect. They really are.
I'm not just saying because I'm practically in love with her.
Well, not practically. I am in love with her. I won't tell her that though.
I reached out and touched one. They are soft. I smiled and played with her pink nipple.
She moaned a little.
"That feels good," she whispered.
I smiled and pressed my finger into it again. She moaned again. I repeated the motion with the other breast.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" whispered Katie.
I nodded. I definitely did. I wanted to do this and I wouldn't back out now.
She nodded back and she kissed me again. I let my fingers run across her stomach. She let out a giggle.
I pulled back and grinned. Katie Nixk is ticklish.
Se pulled me back in and kissed me, wrapping her arms around me. Our chests pressed together. She turned us slightly and pushed me back on the bed. She climbed up on the bed and crawled over to me.
Oh my god.
Her hands made their way to the waist band on the pants she had lent me. She glanced at my face before she pulled them down. I guessed she wanted to make sure I still wanted it. I mean technically what we were doing wasn't legal. Plus it was against school policy. I didn't really care though. At least, not right then.
Katie Nixk wanted to have sex with me. I wasn't about to pass that up because of the goddamn law.
My pants slid off easily because they were much too big.
She hadn't given me any underwear so I wasn't wearing any.
I was a little nervous. Judging by the look on her face I didn't have any reason to be.
She grinned at me and let her fingers run along my thighs.
As much as I love the sight of her in jeans I wanted her to take them off.
She kissed me again and my fingers found the waistband of her pants.
I pushed them down a little. She lifted her hips a little so I could push them down all the way.
Her panties were black.
Oh my god.
She pulled them down and sat on my thighs. God. She was beautiful. Is beautiful, I mean.
God that sounds so corny.
Who the fuck cares. Her pussy is shaved. Damn it's hot.
She leaned down and kissed me. Her hands moved all over me and mine moved all over her. Her skin is soft.
Her hand moved it's way to my vagina and her fingers glided over my clit. God, that felt so goddamn good. I had never gotten that far with anyone, much less a girl.
Katie knew what she was doing, that was clear. Had my mind been capable of thought I would have been doubting that it was the first time she'd ever done that. I wasn't capable of thought though.
I moaned. I was wet and her fingers were moving in patterns I can't even begin to describe.
God, it felt so good. One of her hands was on my breast. It felt so good.
I don't remember all the details of what she did. I moaned loudly.
Her lips found mine and I knew I had to keep quiet. We were still in a hotel with a shitload of people from our school We would get in so much trouble if we were caught. Katie would lose her job.
Every little thing she did felt so good.
It felt so good when I came. I was breathing heavy. God, it was amazing.
She rolled off of me and looked at me.
"God, that was amazing," I told her.
She grinned at me.
I wanted to touch her. I rolled over and climbed on to her.
"Your turn," I told her.
I ran my fingers across her stomach. It wasn't flat. I liked it the way it was. Still do.
One of my hands moved up to her breasts. They looked weird when she was lying down. I liked them.
I leaned down and licked on of them experimentally. She moaned.
I grinned. I liked that noise.
I licked it again. I could tell she was extremely turned on.
My hands moved across her side. I stopped when I reached her wet pussy. God.
My fingers moved over her clit. She moaned loudly. I moved my mouth up to hers to muffle the noise. I moved one finger to touch her center. She moaned into my mouth. I pushed a finger in. It felt strange, but I liked it.
I moved my fingers around, paying attention to the places that made her moan.
I added another finger. I watched her react to every move I made.
She was trying to keep quiet, but it wasn't working.
I leaned down and kissed her as I kept trusting my fingers into her.
It didn't take too long for her to come.
She was breathing heavier than I was.
We lay there in silence for a bit.
"Well, what did you think?" she asked.
"Amazing," I said.
She grinned back.
"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," she told me.
We layed there for a little longer.
"We should probably get dressed," she suggested. "In case someone comes in."
I agreed. I didn't really want her to get dressed. I like seeing her naked.
She slipped off the bed and pulled to pairs of pajama pants out of her never ending bag of clothes. She tossed one at me.
I pulled on the pair of pajama pants and grabbed the black Tinkerbell tank top that I had been wearing earlier off the floor.
She pulled on her pajama pants and a tank top from her bag. She had severely over packed.
She plopped back on the bed and I followed suit.
It was raining outside. I could hear a rumble of thunder in the distance. I have never really liked thunder.
She flipped on the TV.
She was laying on her back. I scooted over and put my head on her chest.
She smiled and snaked her arm around my waist.
We watched SVU. I wondered why it was on so often. That was a little odd.
I didn't think too much of it. Why SVU was on so much wasn't important.
I was lying on a be with Katie Nikx. I had just had sex with Katie Nixk.
Oh. My. Fucking. God.
Did that really happen?
Was I dreaming?
I resisted the urge to pinch myself.
It was real.
Oh my god. This was really happening.
This was really fucking happening.
I was in a good mood. I'm sure that's obvious.
I glanced at the clock. It was nearly eleven.
"You're going to have to check rooms soon," I reminded her.
She glanced at the clock.
"Yeah, you go back to your room and I'll come get you when I'm done. I don't think I'm checking your building."
I was disappointed, but I nodded. We untangled ourselves.
She walked me back to my room and I banged on the door. My key was still in Katie's room.
Scarlet opened the door.
"I'll be back," Katie told me and she disappeared.
I went into the room. Scarlet was back on her bed.
"Where the hell have you been?" she asked.
"Out," I told her. I couldn't tell her. I promised I wouldn't tell. And if I was to tell someone Scarlet would not be the one I would tell. She's a gossip.
Scarlet raised an eyebrow.
"You have the room to yourself tonight. I'm going out again."
She gave me a weird look.
"You aren't the type to sneak out," she said.
"I'm not sneaking," I said. "Anyone asks I was here all night."
She nodded and gave me another weird look.
I lay back on my bed.
"Where the hell are you going?" she asked.
"I told you, out," I said.
"Mike was looking for you."
"I know. He called me."
"I know. He said so."
Since when did Mike talk to Scarlet? Did I miss something?
"Did he really?"
"Yes, he did," she said.
"Why is he a a dumbass?"
"If you are leaving again why the hell are you back here now?" she asked.
Scarlet asks a lot of questions.
"Bed check," I said.
"Right, that. Why was Miss whatever her name is with you?"
"Nixk," I told her. "No reason."
Scarlet raised an eyebrow.
"You are lying," she announced.
"Scarlet, we are not going into this."
"Why aren't we?" asked Scarlet curiously. She can be a bit annoying at times.
"Because I said so," I told her. Normally I hate using that as an excuse. But I couldn't tell Scarlet.
Most definitely not.
"But," protested Scarlet.
I ignored her. I had my phone with me. I dug out my charger and plugged it in.
Scarlet rolled her eyes at me and gave up.
At about 11:03 there was knock on the door.
I jumped up and answered it. It was my teacher, Mrs. Rilter.
"Just making sure you guys are in your room," she said.
"Of course we are," I told her with a smile.
She smiled back.
Most of my teachers think I'm rather innocent because I'm kind of quiet in class. Plus I'm smart. That always helps.
She made sure Scarlet was there and left again.
I made sure my bag was ready to go the next morning. My tooth brush was on top so I could grab it easily the next morning. I unplugged my phone and shoved the charger into my bag.
I lay back on the bed and waited for a knock at the door.
Scarlet flipped on the TV and settled back on the bed.
It was a stupid show. I rolled my eyes.
It was almost 11:30 by the time Katie knocked on the door. I glanced at the clock. I had missed 11:11. Oh well.
I grabbed my phone and went over to the door.
It was Katie.
"I'm leaving now," I told Scarlet.
"Whatever," she said. She was clearly annoyed that she wasn't getting any answers out of me.
I shut the door behind me and smiled at Katie. She smiled back at me.
"If we run into another chaperone, you're out of your room because I'm getting you something for sunburn."
I nodded. Her hair was down. I liked the way it looked.
I've always liked her hair down.
I like the colour of her hair. It's not just one colour. I don't think she dyes it either.
Anyways, I'm digressing again. I haven't done that in awhile. That's probably a good thing.
Anyways, we didn't run into anyone so it didn't really matter.
She fiddled with the key and we went inside.
The door shut behind us and she put the key on the night table.
"Make yourself comfortable," she said with a nod at the bed.
I sat down on the bed.
I felt a tiny bit awkward. I mean, it made sense if you think about it.
She picked up her iPod which had fallen to the ground earlier. She sat down on the edge of the bed and put in an ear bud. She handed me the other.
There wasn't any music playing. She was still scrolling through her play list.
She settled on a country song called "All I want To Do" by a band called Sugarland.
I was familiar with the band (mostly because it was under her favorites on facebook.) The lead singer, Jennifer, is rather talented as well as hot. That wasn't the point though.
I smiled when I heard the song pass through the ear buds.
"You know this song?" she asked with a surprised tone.
"Yeah. I like Sugarland," I said. I didn't tell her how I'd discovered them. That would sound creepy.
She seemed a little surprised. That made sense, Sugarland isn't the most well known band.
She didn't say anything else, just turned up the volume and proceeded to sing along.
She likes to do that. Sing a long, I mean. I'm sure I've mentioned that before.
The song played loud in my ears and I just grinned.
Katie has this grin on her face. I really really love it.
We just stayed there for awhile, lounging and listing to Sugarland.
I swear to God it was the happiest I've ever been. Well not that moment exactly, but the whole damn night.
We must have been having fun because the next thing I knew it was almost two in the morning.
I didn't glance at the clock until I heard her yawn.
"When did it get so late?" she asked with a tone of surprise.
I didn't have an answer for that. Yawns are contagious and I yawned too.
"We should probably go to sleep," she said.
"Yeah," I said.
Neither of us moved. I didn't want to go to sleep. Going to sleep would mean that night was over. I didn't want it to be over. I never wanted it to be over. I wanted to relive it over and over again.
It was my only night with Katie. I couldn't let it end.
Katie yawned again. I sensed that she didn't want it to end either. I hoped that wasn't my imagination.
I don't think it was.
We had to get up at six the next morning though.
"I don't want to go to sleep," I admitted.
She glanced at me.
"Neither do I," she said.
"So why do we have to?"
"Because we'll be falling asleep tomorrow if we don't."
I knew she was right. She saw the look of hesitation on my face and she leaned over and kissed me.
Damn, I love it when she kisses me. I t feels so damn good.
"I don't want his to end either," she whispered.
I couldn't believe it.
I really couldn't.
Katie Nixk actually likes me. She didn't want our one night together to end.
God, this had to be a dream. It fucking had to be.
There is no way Katie would chose me. No fucking way.
"What are you thinking?" she asked.
"That this must be a dream," I said honestly. I don't like lying. I said that already though.
"If it is a dream than we are having the same dream," she said.
I like the fact that she didn't actually say that it wasn't a dream. I mean, if it was a dream would we know that it was? Have you ever stopped to think, while you were dreaming, that it might be a dream?
Most people don't. The question doesn't usually come up.
You don't know that you are dreaming until you wake up. For all we know this is all a dream. I'm digressing again. I'm doing that again.
If it was a dream I hoped I never woke up.
And if any of that was a dream than I am still dreaming.
"Why do you think it's a dream?" she asked.
"Because there is no way any of this could be happening any other way," I said.
"Why wouldn't it be happening?"
"Of all the people why would you chose me?"
"Why wouldn't I chose you?" she asked.
"Because you could have anyone you want. For anything you want."
"Well, I want you," she said simply.
"But why?" I asked.
"Why does there have to be a reason?"
That was a rather good question, why did there have to be a reason? Feelings never have reasons anyway, right? At least mine never do.
"I guess there doesn't have to be," I said.
I felt like there was something more to it. I don't know why, I just did.
"You don't really think that," she said. "You think that is a reason."
How did she know? Is she a mind reader or something?
"I do," I said.
"Well, you are right. Sort of. I didn't just chose you because you were convenient and I was horny. I've been thinking about you for awhile now," she admitted.
"You have?" I asked. I was surprised. I don't know why. I shouldn't be surprised by it anymore.
"I can see you staring when you are in math class, we've been over that already. What I didn't say before was how much I like looking over there and seeing a pair of eyes on me."
She looked straight at me.
"But you said you don't want me to stare anymore," I said.
"I would love to let you. I really would. You don't know how distracting it is to have your eyes on me. You really don't."
"I distract you?" I asked. "You never seem distracted."
"I'm a teacher. It's my job not to show it. I close the door when it gets too bad."
She gets distracted by me. Oh my god.
Hell, half the time I can't pay attention in math class because there is a chance I might see her.
It makes learning math a hell of a lot harder. It really does.
"Is that why you glance over at my class before you shut the door?"
"You are so distracting."
She had said that before. She had told me earlier that she wanted to come over and kiss me every time she saw me staring.
I had forgotten that she had said that.
"Wow," I said.
She grinned at me.
We were silent for a moment, both having forgotten the idea of going to bed.
"I don't know if I can go back to how it was before when we walk out the door tomorrow," she admitted.
"We have to," I said. I wasn't sure if I could either.
There was no choice about it though. We had to.
Once we walked out the hotel room door the next morning we would have to pretend that it never happened. Otherwise she would get fired. I couldn't let that happen.
I would never forgive myself if I was the reason that she lost her job. I never would.
"I know we do," she said. "That doesn't mean it will be easy."
"Life isn't easy," I said.
She smiled a little.
"You're sixteen. You are much too young to be saying that," she told me.
"It's the truth," I said.
She yawned again.
"We really should sleep," she said.
"We should," I said with a yawn.
I really didn't want to.
She slipped off the bed and went into the bathroom.
I stretched out on the bed. It was very comfortable, especially for a hotel bed.
The bed was still made although the covers were messed up from earlier.
I didn't bother to fix them. We would be getting under the covers soon anyway.
I heard a toilet flush and Katie came out of the bathroom.
She started to pull down the covers on the side by the windows.
I went into the bathroom. When I came out she was already under the covers, with a book.
The World According To Garp. I have never read it, but I want to.
Maybe I could borrow it from her later. I know it is one of her favorite books.
She mentioned that freshman year and it's on facebook.
Facebook is very useful.
I'm digressing again.
She put down the book as I lifted the covers and slipped in next to her.
It was well past two am now.
I didn't care.
"Turn off the lights," she said as she scooted down so she was lying.
I got up and turned off the lights before returning to the bed.
I curled up next to her. Despite being a tomboy and all that I do enjoy cuddling. Well, at least with Katie.
Maybe because it's Katie.
I don't know. I doesn't matter.
I put my head on her chest and my arm across her stomach.
"I don't want to go to sleep yet," she said softly.
"I don't want to either. Let's talk," I suggested.
"You," I said. I couldn't believe I actually said that. I like to talk about her. It's one of my favorite topics, as you might have noticed. That sounded a bit creepy though. Oh well.
She glanced at me for a second.
"Okay," she said.
I was surprised that she agreed. I'm sure she saw my surprised, it wasn't like it was hidden or anything.
"What do you want to know about me?" she asked.
"Whatever you want to tell me," I said.
"What do you know already?"
"A lot," I said. I wasn't about to tell her all the things I knew about her. It would most definitely creep her out. I know a lot more about her than I probably should.
Kris calls me a stalker all the time.
"Should I assume that you know more about me than you'd like me to know?" she asked.
I'm really beginning to think she's a mind reader. I really am.
"How'd you know?"
"It's kind of obvious. C'mon, tell me what you already know. I'm curious," she said. Her voice was playful.
I looked at her face. She was smiling. So I told her. I told her what I knew about her.
"Alright, your favorite colour is blue. You live in an Mountains Apartments Complex with your sister, Heather, and your nephew, Kenny. You live in building three, apartment #342. Your car is a blue Toyota. You grew up in Connecticut, I have the address somewhere. You went High Town High School. Your parents are still together and they still live in the same house. You coach track and volleyball. You used to play softball until you broke your leg. You are clumsy. You have broken your leg three times. You went to Marietta College. Despite the fact that you've set your stove on fire more than once you can cook. You like poetry. Your favorite author is John Irving. You like both country and pop music. You have really bad handwriting and you usually write in a blue pen. You talk with your hands. You love food. You like Lucky Charms and yogurt. Your favorite shows are SVU, House, The Office and-"
I stopped speaking then because she was kissing me. Oh my god. She was kissing me again.
"It is so hot that you know all that," she told me.
"Really?" I said. I wasn't even half way done. Like I said, I know a lot. I could probably go on about it for a whole novel. I won't though.
"Really," she said. "I love how you know so much about me."
"I know even more," I said.
"I have a question," she said.
"Ask away," I told her.
"How do you know all that?"
"Internet," I said. "And I listen."
"You can find out anything on the internet," she agreed.
"Yup," I said with a smile. I was happy. She didn't even care that I'm a creeper.
That was the best fucking weekend of my whole goddamn life. It really was. I wish to god I could live it over again. I am aware that I can't though.
"Well, you know so much about me I'm not sure what there is left to tell you," she said.
"There is plenty," I assured her.
"Well, ask whatever you want. I'm sure if I don't tell you you'll find away to figure it out," she said.
I smiled. I probably would. There was one question I could never find the answer to. I asked it.
"What is your middle name?" I asked.
"You can figure out where I grew up, but you don't know my middle name. Seriously?"
"Yes, everything I can find just says "D"," I told her.
"It's Diana," she told me. Diana. Interesting. I made a mental note of that.
"What's you favorite animal?" I asked.
She thought for a minute.
"Frogs," she said.
I like frogs.
We went on like that. Her telling me things about herself, until she started to fall asleep.
I let her. She was tired. She fell asleep quickly.
I smiled as I started to drift off. I was happy. I was lying there, my head on Katie Nikx's chest. In Katie Nikx's bed.
I was happy.
I woke up to the sound of her alarm the next morning. She groaned a little and reached over to her phone to shut it off. My head wasn't on her chest anymore. I had turned over in the night and her arm had been around me until she started looking for her phone.
I felt cold now. I rolled over and watched her. Her hair was messed up. Her shirt was crooked. Her eyes were sleepy and her face looked tired.
I glanced at the clock. It was five am. I turned my eyes back to her.
She looked absolutely adorable when she was just waking up. She really did.
She looked at me.
"What are you smiling at?" she mumbled.
"You," I said. "You're adorable."
She glanced at me and yawned.
"It's too early."
I agreed that it was.
She glanced at the clock.
According to the schedule we had been given at the beginning of the trip we were supposed to be at breakfast at seven.
I had no idea why her alarm was set so early so I asked her.
She smiled a little and turned her head to me.
"Because," she said. "We only have until breakfast."
"So what are we going to do in the next two hours?" I asked.
"Well, I was thinking we could do a little of this," she whispered as she leaned over to me and kissed me.
She had morning breath and I didn't give a crap. We lay there, just kissing for awhile.
"Kaycie," whispered Katie. It was still weird to hear her whisper.
Her face was bright red, more than normal.
"I don't know," she said. I was sure she knew what she was going to say. She just didn't want to. I wondered what it was.
She kissed me again. She rolled over so she was laying on top of me. I felt her body pressing into me. She was warm. I liked the feel of her on top of me. I really did.
She put her head on my shoulder and we just stayed there for awhile.
"When we get back to the school don't be surprised if I avoid you. You can borrow some clothes if you want, to wear today, and you can keep them."
"Okay," I said.
"Don't wear them to school though. I don't want to see you in my clothes."
"Okay," I said.
We lay there next to each other. I really didn't want to go to breakfast.
I wanted to stay there. I wanted to stay there in Katie's arms and goddamn I sound so fucking corny, but it's the truth.
I am fucking in love with a fucking English teacher and in twenty minutes nothing would ever be able to happen again.
I hated that thought. I really fucking did.
I still hate that thought.
"We have to get up," she said. "And you have to go get your bag."
I knew she was right, but I really really didn't want to leave.
We stayed there for a few more minutes before she got up and pulled me with her.
"Come on, let's find you some clothes."
She was still naked. I watched her walk over to her suitcase. She pulled out a tee-shirt with Peter Pan on it. I think she brought more clothes with Disney characters than I own. The shirt was black and Peter Pan was green. She tossed it to me.
"You can wear that," she said. I nodded. She tossed me a bra and I put that on. I put on the shirt. It was a little too big and I didn't give a crap. It smelled like her. I love the way she smells.
She tossed me a pair of sweatpants.
"These will probably fit you better than my jeans did," she said. I pulled them on and they did fit me better.
I wondered why she had packed so much.
They were pink. She likes pink. I honestly don't know why. I've never really liked pink. It's one of her favorite colors though. Other than blue. She really likes blue. That's her favorite color. I said that already though.
I'm digressing. I do that when I'm talking about something that I never want to end. Like my time with Katie.
God, I didn't want that to end. It did though.
I sat back on the bed and watched as she found clothes for herself. We had about ten minutes to get to breakfast. I was sad when she was fully clothed.
I like seeing her naked. I probably never would again. That was sad.
I watched her put all of her clothes back in her suitcase.
I honestly don't know why she brought so much. I probably should have brought more, but not nearly as much as she did.
I watched her brush her hair.
"Should I leave it down or put it up?" she asked.
"Down," I said. I love it when her hair is down, but I've probably said that already. I know I have. I repeat myself a lot.
It's just one of the things I do. I don't know why. I'm digressing again.
She nodded and put her hair brush in her bag. She was wearing a pair of jeans and a tank top. The tank top was blue. It was tight to her skin. She looks good in blue. I love the way she looks in blue. I really fucking do. She's beautiful. Of course, she's beautiful no matter what color she wears. She really is.
I wonder when the last time someone told her that was. I thought about telling her, but I didn't. I honestly don't know why. I wish I did.
She spun around and looked at me. She had this grin on her face. God, I love that grin. I've said that so many times already, but I really do love it. Sometimes I think that it is my favorite thing about her.
I smiled back at her.
"Well, how do I look?" she asked with this playful look in her eyes.
"Amazing," I said. I don't know why I didn't tell her that she is beautiful. I really fucking don't.
She grinned at me and gave me a kiss. I stood up and she twirled me like she had the night before, when we were listening to her iPod.
I grinned back at her. She leaned in a kissed me again and her arms went around me.
I knew we didn't have time for that and I didn't give a crap.
She twirled away from me and zipped her bag shut. She was full of energy.
"We have to go soon, you have to get your bag from your room," she said.
"I know," I said sadly. I didn't want to leave.
She looked at me and in a second the energy disappeared from her face.
"I don't want to leave either. We have to."
"I know," I said sadly.
Her hand found my face. I glanced at it out of the corner of my eye.
When we walked out that door this wouldn't be able to happen again. Could I do that?
"I told you when we started this that once we walked out that door nothing would be able to happen again. You knew that. I know that. That's how it has to be, Kaycie."
"I know," I said. "I didn't think it would be this hard."
"I knew it would," she said.
She glanced at the clock before she leaned in and kissed me. God, it felt as amazing as the first time. It really fucking did.
I really didn't want to walk out that goddamn door.
"Come on, Kaycie. We have to go to breakfast," she said.
I nodded. She check the hotel room to make sure she had everything. She did. She grabbed her bag and we walked to the door.
She kissed me one more time before we opened the door. I will never ever forget that kiss. It was the most amazing kiss ever.
She looked at me one more time before she opened the door.
That's where we parted ways, the door to her hotel room. She went to breakfast and I went back to my hotel room. I pulled my cell phone out of the pocket of her sweatpants as I walked.
Scarlet was still in our room putting on make up. I was glad because I didn't have a room key with me.
She opened the door.
"Should I assume you still won't tell me where you were all night?" she asked.
"You should," I told her. I went over to my bag and I got my tooth brush out.
She glanced at me.
"You look happy, in a weird way," she said.
I didn't really have anything to say to that. I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth.
"Mike called me last night," she said. I sense she wanted me to ask about that, but I kind of had a tooth brush in my mouth.
Scarlet continued talking anyway.
"He seemed worried about you. I'm pretty sure he likes you, Kaycie."
I took the tooth brush out of my mouth.
"Mike doesn't like me," I told her. I went back to brushing my teeth. He didn't like me. He used to, but he didn't anymore.
"Whatever you say, Smith. It really seems like he does. He kept calling and asking me things about you. I finally told him to go fuck himself."
Scarlet doesn't get that I'm pretty sure Mike likes her. He was probably using the topic of me as a reason to talk to Scarlet, I am the one thing they have in common. Other than hating each other, I mean. They have that too.
"Mike doesn't like me," I assured her as I rinsed my mouth out with the provided plastic cup.
I could almost hear her rolling her eyes. Scarlet does that a lot. Sometimes I can tell she's doing it even when I can't see her.
"Don't roll your eyes at me," I told her.
"How did you know I rolled my eyes?" she demanded. Her voice sounded surprised.
I grinned as I threw the plastic cup in the trash can.
"I'm magic," I told her as I put my tooth brush back in my bag.
I could tell she was resiting the urge to roll her eyes at me because that was the focus of our conversation.
"You ain't magic, Smith," she told me. Sometimes she calls me that. Smith, I mean. It's my last name. Most people don't call me that though. Mike does, when he's annoyed at me. Mike gets annoyed easily.
"Whatever you say," I told her as I closed my bag.
She was still putting on her make up. Like I said before, Scarlet wears a lot of make up.
I think she brought more make up than Katie did clothes.
Which says a lot about how much make up she brought. I don't even own that much. Everything I own has been living in the closet for years.
I glanced at the clock. We should probably be at breakfast. I wasn't hungry.
I sat there and watched Scarlet put on her make up.
She raised her eyebrow at me as she put on some lipstick or lip gloss or whatever the hell it was.
"What's with you?" she asked.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"You seem weird," she said.
"How so?" I asked.
"You ain't at breakfast. You love to eat."
"That was wonderful grammar," I told her.
She rolled her eyes. I told you she does that a lot.
"You know what I mean," she said.
"Of course I do," I told her. I didn't feel like answering her question.
It was none of her business. I didn't really want to go to breakfast. I wasn't hungry so there was no point. That and Katie was there. I didn't really want to run into her. I'd have to explain why I was avoiding her to Mike. I didn't want to do that.
I knew I'd have to answer him eventually. I didn't want to though. I had promised Katie that I wouldn't tell him about it. I wasn't going to break that promise.
It was just really hard to lie to Mike so I was avoiding it.
"So what the hell are you still doing in here? Watching me put on make up isn't that interesting. You don't even find movies interesting half the time, Smith," she said.
"Watching you put on make up is longer than a movie," I told her. I don't know why.
She glared at me.
"Get out," she told me. I knew she wasn't serious so I didn't move.
She didn't say anything more until she was done with her make up.
We went to breakfast together. She kept giving me weird looks.
We each grabbed a bowl of cereal and found Mike. She sat next to him and I sat next to Kris.
I was surprised that she sat next to Mike. She hates him. Or at least she claims she does. I still don't think she does.
I'm digressing. I don't even know what I'm digressing from.
Mike raised his eyebrow at me.
"Why is everyone givin' you weird looks?" asked Kris.
"How should I know?" I asked.
"Because they're giving them to you and not me?" suggested Kris.
"Why would they be giving you weird looks?" I asked.
"I don't know," he said with a laugh. It's the laugh he always has when he says something stupid. Which is rather often.
I didn't say anything. I shoved the lucky charms into my mouth. I wasn't hungry.
Lucky Charms are her favorite cereal.
I knew I probably shouldn't think about her, but I couldn't help myself.
"Kaycie, I want to talk to you," said Mike.
"If it's about what I think it is than you can talk, but I'm not saying anything on the subject. Don't even try to argue that one."
Mike looked at me.
"Why are you being defiant?"
"I"m not allowed to tell and you keep asking."
"Who says you aren't allowed to tell?" he asked. He sounded like he was annoyed that someone else had authority.
"I can't tell you that."
I knew the fact that I was being secretive probably wasn't helping my case. I didn't really care though.
I wasn't going to tell him, no matter what he said.
Well, I would try at least.
"I'm sitting next to you, on the bus," he told me. "And we will discuss this."
I shook my head firmly.
It was a facade of confidence. I really hate lying to Mike. I'm terrible at it, I really am.
"Leave it alone, Mike. I'm not telling you anything," I said.
Mike didn't say anything.
Robbie glanced between us with a worried look.
Tanner let out a fake laugh.
"Well, this conversation is awkward. Let's talk about pandas," he declared.
Everybody just looked at him for a moment and then Mike laughed.
He was cracking up.
Everyone else started laughing too. When Mike laughs, you laugh. That's how it works. That's how it always works.
I was glad for Tanner at that moment. See that's the thing about Tanner, you can always count on him to say something random when you need a distraction.
Another thing about Tanner is he really really likes pandas. I honestly don't understand that.
I mean, I like pandas as much as anyone else. I just don't understand why he likes them so damn much.
Anyways, why am I talking about pandas? Oh yeah, Tanner.
He likes pandas.
Anyways, Mike didn't bring up me again. We talked about pandas for a while. Well, Tanner did and we just kind of listened. Then we talked about giraffes.
I like them. Did you know they can't cough?
Anyways, enough about wild animals. You don't really care about that.
It wasn't really an eventful day. We got on the bus without incident. I sat next to Robbie. He chattered on and on about some girl he met at the racetracks. He goes to the racetracks a lot. I didn't really listen. Listening to Robbie is boring. I honestly don't care what he says.
I know that sounds mean, but I see no point in lying in my own thoughts.
At least I wasn't sitting with Mike. That would suck.
I really didn't want to tell him. I couldn't. I had promised Katie and I don't back down on promises.
See, the thing is that I don't make promises very often.
I am against the idea of making them. Situations change and you can't always keep your word.
Sometimes in the future the thing you promised to do isn't even the right thing to do anymore.
Sometimes, it's the most wrong possible thing to do.
I've never liked promises. I really never did.
I only make them when there is no other choice. Like this situation. If I wanted my one night with Katie I had to promise not to tell anyone.
That was something I was willing to do. When I do make a promise I keep my word. Mike knows that.
He shouldn't be trying to make me compromise my values and tell him something he doesn't need to know.
Unless he doesn't know I promised. That could be it.
I decided that if he asked again I would tell him. Maybe that would make him stop.
Mike is generally respectful of things like that.
He's a good guy, really. I know it might not seem like that, but he is.
Robbie kept chattering in my ear until he fell asleep against the cold window.
The bus was a little cold for some reason and I wished I had kept the Tinkerbell sweatshirt I had borrowed from Katie on the boat. It had been nice and warm and it had smelt like her.
I like that smell.
But I couldn't very well go up to her and ask to borrow it again. For one thing it was under the bus.
For another she didn't want to talk to me.
I felt someone touch my shoulder. I almost jumped.
It was Mike and the seat next to him was empty. He motioned for me to sit next to him.
I did so.
"Where's Tanner?" I asked.
"Bathroom," Mike answered. "Katie, about last night."
"Mike," I interrupted. "I really can't tell you. I promised I wouldn't tell anyone anything."
He looked at me for a long moment.
"You actually promised?"
"I did. And you know how I feel about promises."
"I do. Alright, I'll stop asking. Just, Kaycie, don't do anything dumb more than you already have."
I got the feeling that he knew anyway. I get that lot with Mike. The feeling that he knows something he should have no way of knowing.
Like right then I was getting the feeling that he knew I had sex with Katie.
I didn't know how he could possibly know though. Other than the fact that he is Mike. Sometimes I think that's all the reason he needs.
He said no more on the subject. Instead we discussed Scarlet.
"So, is Scarlet like mad at me or something?" he asked.
I laughed a little. Mike can be pretty clueless sometimes.
"Dude, she practically hates your guts."
He looked confused.
"Who knows? It's Scarlet. That's how she works. Why do you care anyways?"
"Because," he said. That was all I could get out of him. It confirmed my belief that Mike has a crush on Scarlet.
It was kind of cute in a weird way. Tanner came back and I went back to sit with Robbie.
Katie was sitting a few rows ahead of me and on the the other side.
She was asleep with her head against the glass.
She looked so cute.
She must be tired. We had stayed up pretty late the night before and gotten up much too earlier after all.
We had maybe two hours of sleep at most.
I was kind of tired too.
It would have been nice to take a nap, but I can never fall asleep on a bus. I don't know why, I've just never been able to.
I yawned again.
I pulled a book out of my bag. I had forgotten to ask Katie if I could borrow that book.
Oh well. Maybe I could ask her about it later. Or I could get it from the library.
I don't like libraries. I like the books I read to be my own books. Or at least not have the annoying plastic cover on them. I don't like the annoying plastic cover. It gets in the way when I'm reading. Te noise it makes is annoying too. I don't like it.
I like reading though. It's rather fun. I like stories. I said that already though.
I said that at the beginning of this, didn't I? I did.
Anyways, I spent most of the bus ride home alternately reading my book and watching Katie sleep. I know that sounds creepy, but she just looks so cure when she's a sleep. Or all the time really.
I needed to stop thinking about her. I really did. I mean, it's not like anything else could ever happen.
The bus right back to the school didn't take that long. I mean it was a few hours, but nothing interesting happened. Katie woke up right before we got to the school. She yawned and stretched.
I liked watching her wake up. I really did. She was so cute.
She looked back at me and smiled. I smiled back at her and she looked away.
I knew I probably shouldn't have smiled at her. I shouldn't have.
She didn't look back at me again until we were at the school.
Scarlet's dad was driving me home and he was already there when the buses pulled in. I looked at her over the car door as Scarlet's dad put my bag in the car.
Katie looked back at me. There was sad smile on her face. I smiled back at her. I'm sure I looked sad too.
"Come on, Kaycie," said Scarlet.
I got in the car and closed the blue door.
It was over.