Author: Adrian StClaire PM
When Darien Addison, a jaded doctor of psychology on probation for blurring the lines between patient and doctor, and Tristan Beckham, a seventeen year old lesbian on her way out of the closet meet for the first time sparks fly...lesbian, rated M for sexRated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 36,905 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 07-27-12 - Published: 11-09-10 - id: 2863242
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Doctor Darien Addison looked up in surprise, setting down her fountain pen and closing a large folder of paperwork. Tristan Beckham stood just inside her office door, looking immensely uncomfortable, the half smile on her face causing her stomach to clench. It had been almost a month since either of them had set eyes on each other.
"Do you have a minute?" Tristan asked after a moment of awkward silence. Addison nodded and pushed her chair back from her desk, standing to invite the teenager inside her office.
"You should close the door," she pointed, and Tristan did just that before sinking down into the corner of the couch across from Addison's chair. This was part of the exchange that Addison knew she would hate the most before it even happened. She had spent the last two weeks trying her best not to think about Tristan anymore. She pushed the girl from her mind and stopped going over what happened repeatedly. She stopped daring herself to go back to her step mother's house, or her friend Victoria's, and begging to talk to her again.
It wasn't until Demi had said something during very strained dinner conversation that Addison even realized she had been brooding.
"You haven't eaten anything I've cooked in two weeks now, Darien," Demi started to complain, after they had both argued themselves into silence for the hundredth time. "Why are we still together when you're not even here?"
Addison found herself replaying that moment in her mind as she stared at Tristan's face, and then her lips. "I didn't think you would come back after that night," Addison finally admitted. She had also decided in the time that had passed that there was no reason to lie to the girl across from her. She wasn't even a girl in Darien's eyes, and that could not be forgotten.
"I didn't think I would come back either," Tristan replied, half joking, the red tinge that spread across her cheeks so endearing. "But I can't stop thinking about you."
Addison cocked her head to one side, never having expected such a line to come from the girl's mouth. "I thought you couldn't do this," Addison responded, still obviously sore over the subject. The room had gone from dead to emotionally overloaded in a manner of minutes. "I thought you said you didn't want me."
Tristan bit her bottom lip and looked away, unable to meet Addison's eyes without feeling incredibly guilty. She had said those things, and thanks in part to Victoria and in part to her own fears she hadn't brought herself to speak about her true feelings to anyone but herself. Now that she was facing the truth she couldn't speak.
"I'm going to loose my job in six weeks," Addison continued, unleashing the brunt of her anger on the girl. "Demi and I are getting div-" Addison started to divulge in the awkward teenager and then bit her tongue to stop herself. This was exactly what science and logical thinking told her not to do.
Tristan looked conflicted. "It's my fault that this is happening to you, isn't it?"
Addison shrugged. "It's my own fault," she sighed, most of the tension in her body concentrated in her shoulders, which she rubbed one at a time gingerly. "I never should've fallen -" again she bit her lip, and this time the meaning was just as obvious as it had been before. Tristan looked across the void of office space longingly at her doctor and smiled sadly. She'd known all along what was happening. The doctor was falling in love.
"I want more," Tristan finally admitted her hands in her lap. Hours of contemplation had led her to the final decision: face her fears and hope for the best. "I've only barely kissed you," the blush that spread across the teenager's cheeks made Addison smile.
The words sunk into the doctor's consciousness slowly, and for half a second she contemplated a repeat performance of a few weeks ago on the couch, visceral and regretless. But now the unspoken feelings between them deserved more then that.
"Come with me then," she surged to her feet and took Tristan's hand in her own, leading her from the hospital office and out of the hospital to the car garage quickly.
Tristan followed silently, her heart thundering in her head and chest. The hand that Addison held felt too hot, but she would never pull away again. Addison made a snap decision and drove into Aspen in search of a hotel where no one would see them. Demi hadn't actually been home in two weeks now, Addison assumed she would come home eventually, but she had no idea when. The last thing she needed was her wife and her teenaged infatuation seeing each other. She glanced across the cabin of her sedan at Tristan, whose eyes seemed to flit every place but to meet her own. It was obvious she was nervous. She tapped her fingers against her thigh and clenched her firsts, and probably would've gone on that way if Addison hadn't stopped her by reaching over and taking Tristan's clammy hands in her own.
"We don't have to do anything you don't want to do," Addison explained.
"But I want to do everything," Tristan was able to muster just enough courage to answer. She was afraid if she said any more she might loose her nerve altogether.
Addison smiled more to herself than to Tristan, wishing downtown wasn't still half an hour away.
Tristan squeezed her hand, catching her attention. "Hurry," she requested simply, the single word enough to send Addison's heart into overdrive, and her foot against the pedal to the floor. She navigated traffic one handed, avoiding the worst of the rush hour with some creative route guidance via Tristan's cell phone.
The grand hotel offered suites for a night at a price Tristan could never dream of paying. But Addison insisted, and a moment later when they were standing along in the elevator, Tristan lost interest in arguing. She let the doctor push her up against the back wall gently, reach up and pull the hoodie back from over her brown hair and wrap an arm around her waist, gripping her in a way that made Tristan feel protected. Then the elevator stopped a floor before theirs, and they broke apart instantly, Tristan's chest heaving from how long she'd been holding her breath.
"You're really something, showing up after missing appointments for a month and then convincing me to treat you out of office," Addison teased, with a small smile. They'd walked the sterile hotel hall hand in hand, in silence, and shut the hotel room door behind them. Tristann found herself caught up in the doctor's long limbs the moment the door was locked, strong arms holding her at the waist again. The doctor leaned against the door, pulling the teenager closer still.
"You make it sound like you don't want to be here," Tristan frowned, pretending to be offended.
"I've been dreaming about this since I first saw you, Tristan," Addison admitted for the first time to anyone except herself. "And now I get to."
"If you're nice," Tristan teased, leaning up to plant a kiss on Addison's cheek. Addison kissed back, but not on the cheek, and before long the two fell back onto the bed and lost track of everything but each other.
Tristan took the opportunity to run her cold fingers up and over the hills and valley's of her doctor's body slowly. The swells on her chest were the most amazing, and the soft moan that came whenever Tristan touched them was mesmerizing. The doctor's long legs and wide shoulders struck Tristan as graceful, not lanky, and when she was wrapped in them the world around disappeared.
Addison's world had disappeared ages ago. Addison breathed in the teenager's scent, cigarettes and candy, and then lost herself in the continuation of the kiss they had first shared on Addison's office couch. When Tristan's tongue pushed passed Addison's teeth the doctor pulled tthem away from the door, reaching to flip off the lights, shrouding them in darkness. Addison felt the buttons of her shirt being pulled open, and she scrambled to catch up, managing the button on Tristan's jeans with one hand, cupping a teenaged breast in the other, as the two awkwardly made their way towards the king grand. Tristan gasped when Addison's fingers traced over her chest; even Kinly had really only groped. The doctor's gentle touch could hardly be compared. Tristan felt cherished, prized, the soft pads of her doctor's fingers a welcomed touch after years of a void.
The doctor stopped walking backwards when her calves hit the soft matress. She sat down, her hight putting her face to face with Tristan now, their lips never parting as Addison torre away the rest of the teenager's clothes, leaving her jeans in a heap on the floor. Tristan straddled the doctor's slender waist, self conscious of the heat that had grown between her thighs with every touch shared between them.
"What are you thinking about?" Addison asked when she could see the teenager's face was more pensive than excited.
"It's nothing," Tristan responded, pushing the doctor onto her back, watching her face as she trailed her fingers through each button of Addison's dress shirt, leaving bare skin exposed. "I just think you're wearing too many clothes," Tristan smiled, reaching up to pull at the front clasp of the doctor's bra. It fell open, and Tristan couldn't help but stare at the breasts she'd only ever seen hints of between Addison's white medical jacket. She reached to tweak a rosy nipple and felt the doctor shiver.
"I've been wanting to meet these," Tristan grinned before taking a nipple between her lips, sending Addison's senses reeling. When the teenager caught a taut peak between her teeth Addison inhaled sharply, her breath catcing in her chest. The pain was divine, almost enough to push her over the edge of gentle care and into the sea of blind lust.
Tristan felt elated by the response her teeth illicted, and began to roll her hips against the doctor's. Her hair fell from its loose ponytail to cover half her face in shadow. Addison reached up to brush away the wayward strands and Tristan watched as she traced over the lines of her face, down one soft cheek, across her parted lips, and then Tristan caught the doctor's finger between her teeth, biting down on it gently. Addison was too mesmerized to smile. The warmth over which Tristan sat was growing warmer as the teenager went from gently biting to gently sucking Addison's finger. The motion of their hips together formed rhythm wholly different from anything either of them had shared with anyone else.
The pair locked eyes, Addison's deep blue pools of longing, Tristan's warm brown echoes of the same. They melted into each other, their bodies joining in synch, the headboard behind Addison's head thumping against the wall in time.
Then Tristan decided to regain control, and it was her turn to roll the two of them over as best she could, and smile when Addison rested over her like a long limbed animal, spreading tiny kisses across her face and down her pale neck, leaving tiny marks where teeth met skin. Tristan writhed beneath the canopy held up by Addison's arms and legs, her hips rising, begging the doctor to multitask.
Addison let out a moan when Tristan's knee found her center, breaking her concentration on the teenager's neck. The pressure Tristan applied felt glorious, and Addison decided to return the favor. Agonizingly slow, without regard for Tristan's frustrated moans, the doctor slipped her hands beneath the waistband of Tristan's underwear, the resulting look on the teenager's face enough to let Addison know that she'd satisfied Tristan's strongest desires. Tristan clutched the doctor's shoulders anxiously, feeling the woman above her suddenly inside her. The doctor was everywhere, kissing Tristan in frenzied bursts, plunging deep inside of her in ways Tristan never thought her doctor would, supporting her with one strong arm around her thin body, watching her with deep blue eyes that seemed to see everything Tristan was thinking.
And then a tear slipped from the corner of the teenager's eye, and Addison stopped, recognizing signs of distress when she saw them. "We don't have to do this," she said again, this time all of the challenge gone from her tone. She wiped the salty drop from Tristan's cheek and lowered herself until they were face to face beside each other, Addison's arms still holding the teenager close.
"It's not that I don't want to, it's just..." Tristan trailed off, her mind a blur of thoughts and emotions she thought she had conquered before setting eyes on Addison again after so many weeks.
"You're scared," Addison finished with a sigh. She wasn't disappointed so much as concerned. As a trained professional, she should have known better then to jump into bed with Tristan, no matter how much she wanted to.
"Not of what you think I am," Tristan responded, unable to meet her doctor's eyes. "I found out about Nikki."