Author: Nelleh PM
Seriously, how can a stupid game of dares change your life? F/F, Femmeslash, Yuri. Rated 'T' for language used :3 R&R please, it's my first story.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 22,887 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 05-19-11 - Published: 04-02-11 - id: 2904519
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N- I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've had loads of exams and I've been dealing with a serious family problem so I've not been in the right mind to write. Hopefully this chapter will make up for it? This chapter is really long. This author's note is getting long now as well. So Enjoy! ... I hope?
I was still stressed out about that kiss with Frankie. Even though we had promised to forget about it, it still lingered on my mind. I had lied to myself and Frankie when I said it wasn't romantic, it definitely was... There was something there, when we kissed. I wasn't quite sure what it was. I hadn't been in touch with Frankie for a while; she had been avoiding me as much as she could as well in school. I wouldn't blame her. If I'd just spilled my heart out to somebody I cared so much for and they acted like a complete idiot, I'd be doing the same.
I... I kissed her back as well. I tried to remember that moment of panic, the split second that her lips hovered in front of mine; ready to seal the gap.
No. I can't be thinking like this, it's not right. I have a boyfriend, I'm straight... I can't lead Frankie on. I felt like I had to apologise.
But, what were these feelings, I actually had nobody to turn to. I couldn't tell Frankie how I felt yet. I couldn't tell Ross either. The only other person I was close enough to was Caitlyn. I picked up my phone and rang her.
"Hey Rach, how are you?" Caitlyn said after picking the phone up.
"Err; I need your advice Cait." I mumbled.
"Sure what can I do for ya'?" she asked.
"I'd rather talk about it in person." I said, waiting for a reply.
"Oh, Okay. I'll be round at yours in about fifteen minutes or so." she said.
"Thank you so much Cait." I smiled into the phone.
"Welcomes." she laughed before putting the phone down. Caitlyn didn't take long to arrive. We went up into my room and sat on my bed.
"Now, what's wrong?" Caitlyn asked, getting comfy on my bed.
"I don't know how to put it." I sighed, trying to think over what I could say.
"It's okay, take your time." she smiled.
"Err. Well, it's kind of me and Ross." I said. "I don't want to be with him anymore."
"Break up with him then?" Caitlyn said.
"It's really complicated." I replied, confusing myself.
"Okay, well... Why do you want to break up with him?" she asked.
"I Err..." I mumbled.
"You like someone else?" Caitlyn's face now had a huge grin on it. I didn't reply. Well at least I thought I did. "Oh come on Rach! It's written all over your face." Caitlyn frowned.
"Well, I think I do..." I muttered.
"Is it that Jesse from the mall?" she asked. Wow, I hadn't spoken to him in a while. I shuck my head, replying to Caitlyn's question.
"Right. Have you even spoken to any other boys?" Caitlyn laughed. I pretended to look offended.
"Why, what are you trying to say?" I asked, sarcastically.
"Ha-ha, your accent is so cute! I want it!" she half squealed. I hung my head in shame, they all knew how much I hated it when they mentioned my accent. It was extremely strong too.
"I'm just messin' with you Rach." she smiled, patting me on the back playfully. "Anyway, back to your 'secret crush'." she laughed.
"I know who it is!" Caitlyn laughed.
"It's Ty!" she laughed.
"Cait, this is serious. I'm confused." I said, giving her a serious look.
"Okay, sorry. You know can tell me anything. I'm here for you." Caitlyn smiled reassuringly at me.
"You'll probably slap me over the head when I tell you." I sighed smiling a little, I was nervous to tell her.
"I think I've fallen for Frankie." I said quickly.
"What?" Caitlyn asked, looking confused and shocked.
"I... We kind of kissed a few nights back. I didn't say anything then, but it felt magical." I admitted.
Caitlyn didn't say anything, her mouth was still wide open, and great she'll probably call me pathetic now.
"So, you are bi?" she asked.
"I'm not sure, that's the problem." I sighed, getting a little frustrated.
"Well, I guess you know Frankie likes you?" she asked, out of curiosity.
"Everyone but me knew." I sighed.
"Rachael. I think you are mad in the head, but don't you dare lead Frankie on. She's damaged enough." she said seriously, she looked me in the eyes deeply. Making sure I understood what she said. "But have saying that, I'd be twice as angry if she ever hurt you."
"So, are you going to talk to her about it?" Caitlyn asked.
I thought about it, maybe I should? It would be best to wait until Caitlyn had left though.
"You won't mention anything to the others though will you?" I asked.
"I won't." Caitlyn promised, winking at me.
"Can I just say if you really like Frankie, go get her? You only live once."
Caitlyn stayed for another hour before leaving to go home, I had a lot on my mind. I was so confused, talking to Caitlyn had helped clear things up a bit. I was now considering the thought I might be bisexual. It was a scary feeling.
I sat there for a while before deciding. I would clear things up with Frankie.
I reached for my phone that was on the table, I flicked through the contacts before I reached Frankie's number. I hesitated before clicking the 'dial' button. The phone rang a few times before she answered.
"Hello?" she asked, her voice was quieter than her usual one.
"Hi, it's Rachael." I said, biting my lip with nervousness.
"I know, I have caller I.D" she replied, I couldn't help chuckle down the phone.
I sighed into my phones speaker, "We need to talk." I immediately regretted what I had just said.
There was a pause before I heard Frankie's reply "Meet me at the park near mine in half an hour." she replied before putting the phone down. I was confused, I was too nervous to talk face to face and all I wanted to do was apologise over the phone and clear up any awkwardness.
I was making my way down to the park which was up the road from Frankie's house. It had started pouring down with rain; I pulled my hoodie up over my head to prevent my hair from getting wet. It didn't work. I saw Frankie's tall figure stood in the park, she had her old leather jacket on, and she didn't have the hood up so her usual nicely styled blonde hair stuck to her face from the rain. As I got closer I saw her eyebrows were furrowed, she looked deep in thought and hadn't noticed me arrive yet. I went over what I was going to say to her in my head. It seemed to make sense. I hoped it would sort any awkwardness out.
She leaned up from the swing she was slouched against when she saw me. I stood face to face with her; she looked down to me and smiled slightly.
"What did you want to talk about?" she asked, trying to stop the silence.
"I wanted to apologise." I said honestly.
"What for?" she asked, she looked confused.
"You poured your heart out to me Frankie" I said seriously, I paused trying to remember what I was going to say. "I, I'm sorry because didn't care. What you said, when you said you liked everything about me."
"What I said was true." Frankie replied.
"I know. I was just going to say, Ross cares about me, he does," Frankie just looked at me, very confused. "He's never told me what you did Frankie." I explained
Frankie opened her mouth to say something, but just shuck her head.
"It made me feel special." I confessed.
"Rachael, this is messed up." Frankie said, shaking her head once more.
"I know, I know. I'm just explaining how I feel." I said shyly. "But I didn't really think about anything you had said at first Frankie. I must have been too shocked, well err... More surprised from that kiss."
"Again, I'm sorry for that Rachael." Frankie apologised sheepishly.
"What happened yesterday made me realise, how much Ross has changed since he joined the football team." I muttered.
"Have you only just realised?" Frankie asked with a slight chuckle in her voice, I smiled slightly at this. I looked at Frankie who had raindrops dripping off the end of her nose; she kept her eyes locked on me.
I sighed deeply. "I want to return the favour from yesterday."
"What?" Frankie asked, before I kissed her. She kissed me back and pulled my hood down, revealing my slightly red cheeks. The kiss was warm; I didn't want it to end. It felt... Perfect. Frankie pulled away, and smiled slightly.
"Rachael, err?" Frankie asked, looking both confused and happy.
"I've realised how much you mean to me Frankie. You've always been here for me. I think I've fallen for you more than you have for me." I smiled shyly.
"You've got a boyfriend Rachael." Frankie said frantically.
"I know, I think I'm going to break it off with Ross." I sighed.
"Bu- but, it will cause a massive row." Frankie said.
"I'm not happy with him. I like him, a lot. But I like you more and I want to be with you Frankie." I admitted, my voice got quieter as I said this due to nervousness.
"I don't know what to say." Frankie smiled, she sounded worried though. We both looked at each other.
"Shit, this is awkward." she laughed.
We stood in the rain, neither of us spoke. I looked at Frankie; she was trying to avoid eye contact.
"Right, I'm going to go and break things off with Ross." I decided. "I'll ring you later." I said. I walked off leaving behind a very confused Frankie.
I walked to Ross' house; it was a far walk from the park, so I was more than soaked when I reached there. I sighed nervously before ringing the doorbell. I thought about running away from the door, but it was too late since Ross had opened the door.
"Oh hey Rachael, and what do I owe this visit?" he asked, grinning a little. "Oh god, you're drenched Rach." he said. He motioned me into the house, closing the door behind me. He disappeared for a moment and came back with two towels. He handed them to me to dry myself with.
"What's up?" he asked, curiously.
"We need to talk." I said, the smile on his face dropped immediately. They were the words nobody wanted to ever hear in a relationship, because they were usually the words that ended them.
"Err, sure." he said, looking at me sternly.
"You've changed Ross." I said bluntly. He just stared at me, clearly confused.
"You came all the way over here to tell me I've changed?" Ross began to laugh.
"No." I said he looked at me. "I've come here to break up with you." his face dropped as each word spilt out of my mouth.
"No, Rach." he sighed, his voice was frantic.
"Ross, I just can't anymore." I sighed, this would be harder than I expected.
"You can't just end it with me like that!" he said, he was frustrated.
"It doesn't feel right Ross, us two. I'm so sorry." I said, I offered him a hug. He took the offer and sighed heavily into my shoulder.
"I care about you so much Rach. I might not have been showing that lately, but I do." he said.
"I don't want to lose you as a friend Ross. When I say this I mean it: You mean the world to me. Just not in a boyfriend kind of way."
"I can't lose you Rach." he almost sobbed.
"Please don't cry, you'll make this harder." I said, almost bursting into tears as well.
Ross took my hand in his and looked me in the eyes, "
Rachael. I'm always going to want you to be mine." He said, staring to cry. I can't take it now, I can't see him crying. I think I've just broken his heart. That's two people in a row now, good going.
"Wait." Ross sniffled.
"Yes?" I asked, tilting my head.
"Frankie's involved in this." he said, his teary eyes looked straight through me.
I couldn't lie to him.
"No." but I did.
"Well what's all this about then?" he asked, tears spilling down his face.
"I want to be single; I need to think things over."
"Please don't leave me." he whimpered.
"Ross, please your making this harder for both of us." I sighed.
Ross started crying again, his eyes were filled with pain and anger now; I couldn't bare to look at them.
"I'm so sorry Ross."
Ross walked over to the door, and opened it.
"Please leave. I need some time to think." he muttered, keeping his gaze at his feet.
"I'm so sorry." I cried as I left the house. I ran home and locked myself in my room. Ross didn't take it too well. I sighed. My phone started buzzing. It was Frankie.
"Hello?" I said as I answered the phone.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"It was harder than I thought." I sighed; it had given me a bad headache.
"Ross has told everyone about the breakup. Ty is furious; some of the others are as well." Frankie sighed.
"Damn." I sighed.
"Hey, I'm here for me if you need me." Frankie reassured down the phone.
"I'd just like to talk." I sighed, waiting for a reply.
"About what?" Frankie asked, yawning down the phone.
"Us." I whispered.
"Look, Rach. You've just broken up with your boyfriend. Now you are questioning your sexuality." she muttered down the phone.
"It's what you want though." I sighed. Great, this wasn't going like I had planned.
"I want you to be happy. You obviously aren't, you are under stress from Ross and now questioning your sexuality. It would be too much for you to be in a relationship." Frankie explained down the phone.
"I'd be happy being with you." I declared.
"There's nothing more I'd want than to be with you as well Rach, but you aren't fit to be in one at the moment. Don't take it the wrong way though." Frankie sounded upset as well.
Why was she doing this, a few days ago she was spilling her heart out, today she kissed me and now she's unsure.
"Frankie, I've just broken up with Ross because I want to be with you. I really do." I explained "When I'm with you I feel, I feel warm and cared for. With Ross we were just more like friends."
Frankie didn't say anything.
"Are you still there?" I asked.
"Yeah, yeah. I'm just Err, thinking." she said.
"Rachael, I really want to be with you too. I just can't bare to see you upset like this. It kills me really, it does."
"Being with you would make me happy." I admitted.
"I don't want to break your heart though Rach. I don't want to lose what we already have." I could hear her getting stressed over the phone.
"We wouldn't lose anything." I replied, waiting nervously for Frankie's response.
"I... Err." Frankie stuttered.
"Fuck it Rachael. I want to be with you." I almost dropped the phone at her reply. My face had a massive smile stretched across it.
"So Err, are we Err...?" I mumbled, embarrassed.
"Together?" Frankie finished my sentence.
"Yeah, that." I laughed slightly.
"I guess we are." Frankie's voice said from the other end of the phone.