Author: Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu PM
From the twilight of Eastern Han to the world that we know now... what is that fate awaiting those destined to suffer the chains of history? Rated M for swearing and a dose of political incorrectness.Rated: Fiction M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 15,454 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 11-23-11 - Published: 05-11-11 - id: 2914325
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Dude, this is SO insane. Supposedly I should be finishing this sub-chap N weeks ago. But apparently Baidu has officially eaten up my time like no tomorrow. Now I've officially got a second FaceBook so as to speak. But then again it's been pretty fun pwning the trolls there so far. Even much more satisfying than going apeshit crazy in Yahoo! SG. :D Anyway, this sub-chap would be a big one to chew as in I've quite obviously added tons of new stuff together with the general contents of the previous write. Okay, so just to keep you guys in track on who's who in this sub-chap barring the debutants:
1. The modern day characters will be placed first, followed by their Sangoku counterparts.
2. The Sangoku characters will have their names placed first, after which their style name will be placed at the end.
3. The style naming format is something akin to a formal honorary name.
All the Japanese and Chinese names will have their surnames placed first followed by the given names.
Suzumura Kenpachi as Zhang Fei Yide
Nagase Jin as Deng Zhi Bomiao
Miyagi Ryo as Xu Shu Yuanzhi (This guy will only be briefly mentioned)
Mashima Ryuji as Liu Bei Xuande
Lastly one big ass warning: This chapter isn't for the politically correct folks. Period. -.-
The Dragon of Shu Han: Interlude 3 – Earth's Valour
Somewhere in uptown Osaka
"Look Suzumura Kenpachi, I know you wanna tag along but do you mind not to gatecrash this little party of mine?" sighed a Japanese lad around his mid twenties and clad in a sleeveless collared shirt with tight fit trousers, "Yes I know you as the 'Cycle' of Zhang Fei Yide. Is that enough for you now? Can you just do an auto-bailing if you get what I mean?"
Kenpachi could only glare at his drinking buddy as he downed the remnants of his Long Island Tea in a single go, which at this point was at least half full. The look on his handsome face was only way too tell tale pertaining to his intention. Osaka has been known to be a major player in the clubbing scene. There's a saying amongst the Japanese: The best memories of losing your virginity starts with Osaka and will stay at there.
Why in the blue hell would Daimon Haruya be so bloody desperate to get laid for the first time, no one knows and neither should Kenpachi be bothered with that as well. Of course when it came to inheriting the persona of his 'Cycle', anything and everything could happen any moment. But then again, Kenpachi has never given a single damn about it. Since Zhang Fei Yide would always get into trouble because of his impulsive nature, Kenpachi didn't see any need to change the whole thing where he himself is concerned.
"Okay five minutes, Yide," said Haruya as his eyes continued the targeting process, "I'll let you rant like a terrorist boss within this time gap. After that, zip your mouth. Period. And please don't make an ass out of yourself here. The fact that you might be a closet gay doesn't mean I should be one as well."
"No I'm not a gay. It's just a matter of my looks, you motherfucker..." Kenpachi shot back as he ground his teeth in response to what had happened earlier that morning, "Anyway, my younger sis bitched again. The same went for my parents as well. All because of that stupid good-for-nothing moron who thinks he will be the most able Housing Bureau boss just because his dad holds the current post."
"Customary stuff?" asked Haruya indifferently.
"Yeah. Well you know my sis. She's always going batshit crazy whenever I brought up the subject of possible cock ups on the ruling end. Well you know all that 'you should go to other countries just to discover how lucky you are' kinda bullshit," said Kenpachi as his frustrations grew, the very evidence in the form of another bottle being served up.
"Too bad then," replied Haruya in a sing-song attitude while the ornamental ceiling fan somehow continued to ruffle the bangs hovering above his eyes, "There's a difference between whining and raging. The former suggests the stupid view that only your own life suck. The latter quite obviously goes deeper into the cerebral end as in trying to understand how much people in power enjoy lying even to themselves. Ironically though, it seems that only the lower educated people understand this simple logic."
"But I remember you're a fucking MIT asshole to start with," said Kenpachi as he ordered yet another drink while retaining his thundercloud face, this time a vodka cocktail.
"Asshole, yes. MIT, no. I got expelled N ages ago ever since the Grannygate stunt that I've pulled for fun, remember? And yeah, I remember that nice little Bachelor in Literature Arts you've tucked in somewhere..." said Haruya in reply as he caught sight of his target, "Hey Yide look! Now there's one hot girl in sight. Ten o' clock with a nice set of tits. My own guess on that measurement front will be..."
"Forget it Boyue. You won't get to massage those melons, let alone hitting that pussy. I bet the boobs are fake anyway," chimed a childish voice as Haruya himself felt like strangling that offensive kid behind him. After all if one has met a certain half-gaijin shota, he has seen it all in the great trolling hall of fame.
"I remember you being somewhere in a posh hotel, Jin," said Haruya as veins popped up in his head.
"Oh yeah," smiled Jin naughtily as he hopped onto the empty seat beside his friend, "Mom and Dad are trying for number 2 after so many epic failures lasting for... like what, five years? Well since they believe that a great romantic atmosphere will go a long way in helping out, they just figured that the nearby Ritz Carlton will do the trick nicely. Man, Ryo should just drop by there. At the very least he will be more proactive in finding a mate."
"Forget it kuso-gaki," smirked Kenpachi as he looked at his cellphone screen with his eyes glowing eerily, "If Yuanzhi can get laid, that will be the greatest act of God. Okay gotta scoot now. Interesting shit is about to happen."
"Eh that expression... I'm willing to bet that a major shitstorm is now brewing and it's not gonna be some stupid brawling," said Jin with his expression unchanged, "Xuande sure knows how to play his card."
Then as Jin turned back to face the remaining drinker, he actually found that person missing in action, "Hey wait a sec, Haruya has gone off for sex hunting? Shit this doesn't sound good..."
Upon that very realization, the 'Cycle' of Deng Zhi Bomiao began to feel a shiver creeping up his spine, for he knew that Zhang Fei has fed him to that lone shark.
X X X
"This is the greatest bullshit ever... the young unicorn of Tianshui my ass!" muttered Deng Zhi darkly as the sight of an intoxicated Haruya sitting next to him made him wondered how much money he would earn for harvesting his organs, "Hey jii-chan! Drive faster damn you!"
"I'm going very fast here kiddo," said the taxi driver impatiently, "You're testing my endurance there. The speed limit is eighty kilometres. I'm not gonna ditch my rice bowl just for the sake of some stupid drunkard..."
"He's no stupid drunkard mind you," shot back the shota as his tone indicated that he's nearing the breaking point, "He's much more than that, he's a bloody motherfu..."
Before Deng Zhi could finish his sentence though, a loud retching sound was heard, that all too familiar warmth spreading all over his body that would end up in nothing short of a mindrape. And for the very few moments in his life, Deng Zhi Bomiao has finally exploded with the results possibly on the par with the atomic bombings all those years back.
"ARGH! FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU JIANG WEI BOYUE! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU AND FEED YOUR NUTS TO THE STRAYS!"
X X X
"PUSSY HUNGRY JAPS ALL OF YOU! BLOODY ISLAND MONKEYS ONLY KNOWING HOW TO MATE AND BREED! I AM AN EXCHANGE STUDENT! I STAND FOR THE WAY OF JUSTICE SYMBOLIZING THE VERY BEST OF HUMAN VIRTUES! DUMBASS NERD OF THIS FUCKING SHITHOLE UNIVERSITY! WHADDYA MEAN BY HUMAN ARROGANCE, HUH? AM I SOUNDING LIKE A CHERRY PICKER ON THE BIBLE VERSES? ONLY THE CUNTS DO THAT! NOT ME! CHRISTIANITY IS THE STUPID SHIT WHEN IT COMES TO GENDER INEQUALITY FUCKING DAMMIT!"
"HAHAHAHA! BAKA! BAKA!" howled a bald Japanese youth upon seeing the video in his laptop. If there has been any outsiders nearby, they would have demanded the landlord for an immediate eviction. But then again the poor bugger have gotten used to the insane antics of the three tenants in unit 20-405 especially when the lights would be on until the wee hours. In fact this fact has been stressed home via the local enforcers closing one eye in the face of such an idiocy. The noise pollution didn't last for long though as a certain virgin suffering from depression end up going crazy from the nearby room. One single blur of white and the flower vase crashed home straight into the back of his head.
"FUCK YOU GONGYAN! MY HEAD IS EXPLODING RIGHT NOW! YOU BETTER STOP THAT SHIT!"
"Eh you've gone way overboard with the ruckus here Gongyan," said a slightly older lad spotting a buzz cut who was wearing nothing but a pair of singlet and shorts, "We all know what the hell happened to Boyue last night. It's a bloody miracle that Bomiao didn't end up having his hands... well erm, bloodied?"
Upon seeing an unresponsive Gongyan keeling his head over onto the computer desk completed with a pair of crosses as eyes, his friend could only sighed indifferently as he gazed at that video still set into looping mode. Smiling wickedly at the sight of an apparently stoned obese teen running around with nothing but his boxers and a pair of lacy panties stretched over his head, the Japanese youth could only savor their victory as the damned clip has gone viral no thanks to that hacking job done upon the request of their leader's friend.
X X X
Jiang Wei Boyue could only remain silent as his boss finished relaying the orders over the cellphone. Somehow or another, he had recovered from the state of hangover rather fast and it helped quite a lot in making sure that he isn't hearing things. After a brief formal exchange of parting words, he held the phone tightly as he displayed a grin that spoke volumes of the desire in releasing the 'War Soul' in him. Now if only Jiang Wan Gongyan would quit his habit of laughing like a lunatic despite not being one himself. Nakamadachi would be so shafted if he was to be hauled into the nearest mental hospital.
X X X
"So you didn't say anything about Bomiao's current state, ani-chan?" asked Zhang Fei as the cigarette smoke wafted into the morning air, "Truth to be spoken he's already spooked out from what has happened in the taxi. Might as well tell Boyue the truth about that last minute diplomatic mission."
"Well truth to be spoken the situation is pretty abrupt in nature. Pakistan has been relatively stable for the past few years, but then again tempers have flared up during the recent weeks," said Liu Bei while he continued to fix his sights onto the skies, the very frigid expression betraying his desire in ruling the world, "I really need to send Bomiao over to smooth things out especially given the fact that other countries are waiting to swoop in. That country may have nothing valuable, but controlling the people will ensure an absolute control over southern Asia."
"Heh, isolating India as the goal, huh?," grinned Zhang Fei as his combative streak began to surface in the form of a single grin, "Ah well at the very least when that stupid shota comes back, his demanded payment will still be met. I really feel sorry for Nakamadachi after that successful mission to turn the international media into a massive circus. I've seen that video though and it was actually something that an old friend of mine filmed down recently,"
Zhang Fei's expression however softened as the very mention of that said friend left his lips. The memories of his first meeting with a certain political scion came back to haunt him, the images not that of sorrow, but rather a certain regret no different from what he had felt during that meeting in Gucheng.
"Heh... not too bad for a random upstart," sneered the androgynous fighter as his opponent stared at him without any show of emotions, "I should have known that you're not just as simple as Yunchang's loser whelp last time round. Now I know why Xuande sees you as his equal."
"I won't deny the fact that Yunchang has defeated me during our very first fight... but from your very own words, it seems that you're trying to hint that I'm the only person Xuande has and will truly value as an absolute equal despite my status as his vassal, let alone one of a commoner's status."
Upon hearing those very words, Zhang Fei Yide could only feel a sense of unabated anger. And he knew the very reason why. That mounted youth who has distinguished himself as Liu Bei Xuande's chief cavalry commander during the battles against Yuan Shao... Zhao Yun Zilong. He was mocking that very bravado, the brittle soul being hidden and protected. All for one single lost cause. And it wasn't that of his lord's, but rather the very desire to have a brother that he never had and would never have. With a deep roar of primal fury, he charged towards his opponent, hell bent in smashing that loathsome poker face. Nothing less would do.
Recalling that very damning moment of his 'Cycle', Suzumura Kenpachi could only grit his teeth in anger. But the object of his rage has never lie with that emotionless statue of male beauty all those years back. He felt angry with himself. That the conclusion of the fight had never been drawn. That very promise the two have made after the inconclusive draw before the vast plains across that city... everything had been made into an outright mockery when he met an untimely death at the hands of his own subordinates. Ironically, that have paved the way for Zilong's ultimate status as the last great general under Liu Bei's reign who in turn have outlived his liege. Without thinking twice, Kenpachi stubbed out his fag onto the grass below him.
"Please don't do that, Yide. If someone sees you doing it anywhere down the line, I'm not going to bail you out. That previous little fight you've gotten yourself into has caused me quite a bit of problem especially when the victim is the son of the Housing Bureau head," said Liu Bei with his features betraying no hints of emotions, "Anyway you and Boyue will be taking the first flight this Sunday. Taiwan itself is a country of strategic importance. Cao Cao and Yuan Shao would have started their individual moves by now and I'm not about to let up as well. As for Yuanzhi, I have another task for him to do. And much more vital at that..."
X X X
AD2013, Kotoba Private Academy
"Fucking son of a gun... you sure have the balls to bitch smack that good-for-nothing man-whore, eh?" smirked the boy standing across Shinomiya Kaede as he came off the better in their fight, "Pretty much of a shame that you just decided to stick your foot into that kid's affairs."
"What is your beef with another person helping a special needs student? Unless you're worse than a retard," said Kaede as his cold orbs bore deep into his opponents.
"Well how's your broken body holding up then? You're pretty much of a pitbull pup, but you're gunning against a rottweiler my friend."
Everybody knew how much of a punk was Suzumura Kenpachi despite his deceiving looks as a pretty boy. Right from the start, no one was immune to his targeting where he will just proceed to bash anyone he doesn't like even if it's just boiling down to looks alone. Already Kaede's body was aching all over from the numerous bruises dealt by his opponent's hard hitting punches. And that's given he was no slouch in the brawling department either. Yet however there was no way that he would throw in the towel. Spitting out the blood welling up around his molars, he proceed to go for broke. Upon his defiance, Kenpachi could only laughed loudly much to his burgeoning annoyance. Yet before he could shoot back any reply, the resident school punk proclaimed the statement that will spark off the greatest nightmare Kotoba Private Academy would ever see in its prestigious history.
"Oh my fucking gosh! You're really one bloody sod of steel, huh? Well let's be frank here. I've never abducted that kid. It's just me trying to jump on you. To test whether you're really that ballsy like what that fella has said. You passed. With an A plus grade no less. Also he's dining in that famous German restaurant right now. Munching into a serving of top grade Schweinshaxe no less," said Kenpachi with a sly grin betraying what he would be saying next.
"So far so good for that dumb teaching whore though. I know what the hell you're gonna do after she humiliated that poor kiddo just because she's a slut for her own anger and a closet dick addict. Man this hypocritical shithole is in for a PR Hiroshima for sure. Heads are gonna roll, all the sneering dumbasses gunning for detention, perhaps even a system overhaul... damn it sounds so romantic to me, I thinking I might have gone nuts already."
X X X
"Kaede-sama..." whispered Xiaoyu as her young master's sleeping visage gave her that one hope that things will turn out fine one day. For way too long, Shinomiya Kaede has never exuded that peaceful aura as his mind drifted off to the past way before they had met each other. When was the last time where his lips have curved oh-so slightly upwards? When was the last time she had seen a different Shinomiya Kaede dozing off before her own sight? His dorkish bowl cut has been abandoned in favour for a simple, yet stylish hairstyle with the center slightly parted, his eyelashes surprisingly long. His facial features bore the stoicism of age and the innocence of hope yet to be lost.
Never had she saw him displaying that very serenity that he had never have and never before seen. Indeed he had shut himself off from everybody else with herself as the only outlet for his emotions. The numerous sessions of sex they had ever since she entered the household has been nothing more than venting their emptiness via the most convenient and primal method possible. And above all, she knew why as the memories of Shinomiya Makihisa's instructions came back to haunt her.
"I can never do anything for Kaede," sighed the middle aged man as his eyes never left its steely gaze on the lowly would-be maid, "But do not get this wrong. I won't accept you as a worthy helper at his side by default. Japan has been a pragmatic country all the while especially post-Apocalypse. Therefore if you can't prove yourself, then out you go."
"But what if I manage to prove myself?" asked Yan Xiaoyu as her brown orbs never left that of her employer's, "Will you let me stay at Kaede-sama's side?"
What was supposed to be just a few seconds of silence felt like witnessing the unbearable desolation wrecked by the merciless storms of hail. Both could see their own pains and hopes. But yet neither would be willing to show the hand hidden up in their sleeves. Shinomiya Makihisa couldn't believe his eyes as the Taiwanese beauty never showed any fear, awe or even respect in the face of authority. In a brief instant, he was tempted to rape her on the spot just to put her in that rightful place which she truly deserve: That of a lowly maidservant having no rights barring any requests from his son.
All for the one sole reason: she reminded him of the woman he loved the most, yet hated to the very core. The daring whore who was Kaede's mother. But he knew he couldn't do that. It would implicate Kaede and no real father should subject his son under any more emotional torture.
X X X
"Eh, I've fallen asleep, huh?" said Kaede as he woke up bleary eyed from his brief nap, "Man I should have slept earlier last night. The kids are gonna be a real bother. By the way, Xiaoyu. Are we there yet?"
"Actually you've only dozed off for around fifteen minutes, Kaede..." before Xiaoyu could finish her sentence, the gentle warmth of Kaede's hand clasped around that of her own, the very familiar rush of emotions that has stung her heart. He should deserve someone much better, let alone a sex toy like her. Never have he felt any desires in obtaining her and vice versa as well. Before she could make her voice being known however, Kaede cut her off with an impish grin which belied the truth of his gentleness.
"You don't have to call me Kaede-sama. Just as always whenever we snuck out for a fun night, I just want you to call me Kaede. Is that even a tall task?" said Kaede as he continued with a changed attitude akin to an outright wistfulness, "I've just had a dream. Not that of oka-chan, but rather that one and only S.O.B who can call himself as my friend."
Xiaoyu smiled as the Kaede before her became nothing less than what others have failed to expect. Troll-miya, That Kokkai brat, Humanist nutjob, Mr Anti-system... the list goes on. But never even once had he ever shown his true colours to the world:
That of a broken boy still crying for his long lost mother all those years back. She had never witnessed those damning memories in any way or form, but yet she was still able to visualize that image of trauma that scarred him beyond cure. And it's all because they have been walking that same road all the while.
And it's all because they have been walking that same road all the while.
X X X
"Bzt... Kaede played us out again. Said that he won't be coming to our farewell bash this weekend just because of some potential mass rape coming from an army of orphans if he agreed to come," sighed Haruya as he looked at Kenpachi with an utmost annoyance, "And please don't get me into trouble, tranny punk. Seeing you downing Belgian brews so early in the morning is an absolute recipe for disaster."
"Eh, I beg your pardon'?" asked Kenpachi as he stared at his vitriolic buddy, "I believe you've yet to forget how I curbstomp that sorry ass of a rich kid bully."
"Yeah I still remember that stupidity of the highest order. Apparently, I failed to get laid because of you!"
"Well forget it bro. For all we know, she might be HIV positive..."
Upon the parting shot being fired, the two stooges on display began to stare at each other, electricity crackling in the air upon prolonged eye contact. A moment of silence ensued. Then all hell broke loose as the duo blew their rabid fuse starting with a statement of unison.
"WHY IN THE BLUE FUCK MUST I TEAM UP WITH YOU?"
X X X
Witnessing a pair of morons trying to force their fingers further into each others' nostrils was quite obviously the best script for any reality show. As he marvelled at the comedic duo just across the road while sipping his iced coffee, Mashima Ryuji displayed a good humoured smirk. Even the highest ruler of any given faction deserved a brief moment of laughing at other people's idiocy. But then again, the police would be here any moment. And this time round, he would have to bail out two jackass jocks instead of just one. But this would only be the least of his problems.
Because Gongsun Zan Bogui would never bend over for anyone else where his target is concerned... no matter what, Liu Bei Xuande must secure that "spear" before his opponent one way or another...
X X X
Dude this is so screwed up. Originally this should be around six pages long, but yet it managed to stretch until the ten page mark. In fact, this is another example on why there's such a thing called conflict between theory and reality. Anyway, quite obviously this sub-chapter would have given the involved characters a more even share of the meat pie called characterizing.
Important Note: The only vital bugger in Nakamadachi at the moment (Note: Shit might be subjected to random changes due to my even more random creativity fuse. -.-) will be Daimon Haruya aka Jiang Wei Boyue. The other named dude Jiang Wan Gongyan is nothing more than a nutjob comic relief here for now. As for the unnamed third, well let's just rest at it.
And yes, the entire Nakamadachi guys are totally dysfunctional in their own ways. The batshit crazy lolarity ensuing throughout the scene is there for a reason. :D
And lastly, I'm not regretting the decision to make Jiang Wei Boyue as that butt monkey in case any rabid Dynasty Warriors fangirls want to take it up with me. Apparently, it should be his rightful due after his obsessive patriotism that ultimately contributed to the demise of Shu Han itself. And no, I'm not making this up. Take a cold hard look at the Three Kingdoms history itself and you'll know. -.-
P.S: One e-pepperoni pizza coming up warm from the oven if anybody can guess which particular video game of its respective series the final lmfao outburst between Kenpachi and Haruya is spoofing. :)