|I LOATH YOU, BUDDY
Author: aMyTaichoDa PM
So, he dares intrude my family, does he? HA! I don't think so, pops. I hereby solemnly pledge not to give in to his disgusting charms or obnoxious flirting. What, he thinks he can just SHOW UP one and day expect me to goosh out a toothy smile, cackle a friendly 'welcome' and laugh at his conceited jokes? Pfffffffft... Help me.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 30,996 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 06-21-12 - Published: 07-03-11 - id: 2929169
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
FULL SUMMARY: If you ask me, this is all my mother's fault. She just absolutely had to go to that party and absolutely had to take in that pig. Now I'm stuck with His Royal Swineness for a WHOLE WEEK! What did I do wrong, god? TELL ME! I've done all my homework! I've finished my projects! I haven't made fun of Mr. Gray's mole...Lately. SO WHY? Why did you have to bring him into this family? And why do I ever-so-cliché-ish find myself falling for his grotesque little smugness? WHY DOES THIS SUMMARY MAKE IT SOUND SO DAMN DRAMATIC?
Why do read to find out. ^3^
Well, well, well. What have we here? FRESH MEAT! Perfect ^W^ Hey, BOB, PASS THE SALT!
Oh, in case you didn't know, Bob is the transition guy.
ψ( ｀ω´)ψ -THAT ONE RIGHT THERE.
He'll be poppin' around in there, so try to get along ;D
This is actually my FIRST STORY EVAR, so don't you go all GRANDMA on me.
I mean HERE I AM, CHASING MY DREAM, and what are you doing? SITTING ON THE COUCH READING MY STORY, THAT'S RIGHT! SO DON'T YOU GET PICKY WITH ME!
CHAPTER 1: S.O.S— SWINES OVERTAKE SOCIETY
As I skipped through lollypop valley and swam in the pond of happiness, my pet pony slept on a sunny patch on the grass next to my gingerbread house.
Ah, yes, it's all pink and flowers, with rainbow-filled skies, and-
"NANAAAA!" my naggy mother's voice made me snap my eyes open.
OH DEAR GOD WHAT TIME IS IT?
I glanced at my clock. It was almost seven.
"Wah is it?" I called groggily, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. My history book was happily napping on my stomach. Oh, right. I was studying for my history test. Or trying to, anyway, until the evil clutches of sleep took me and held me hostage.
Alright, I'm being stupid 'cause I'm still half asleep. Don't mind me.
"WE'RE GOING TO BE LAAATE!" she howled, and I groaned and buried my face in the pillows.
My mom just ADORES the welcome party we had each year. Yep, at my school, the soccer clubs from our brother institute in Florida would come over to play their finals.
Now what exactly is my opinion on soccer?
That's my opinion. I just don't understand how boys can have a super blast just running around, kicking a ball in a random direction. It doesn't make sense.
Yet again, boys don't make sense.
Oh, don't get me wrong. No, this story doesn't tell about a six-year-old girl who thought boys were yucky and cooties this and cooties that. No, I'm a mature, fourteen-year-old young woman who has seen the bigger picture.
Which is why I shrieked and jumped ten feet in the air when my alarm clock went off.
"Is everything alright up there?" mom asked from downstairs.
I clutched a hand over my heart. "Uh huh," I mumbled stupidly.
After death-glaring at my clock for the thirteenth time, I dragged myself out of bed and out the door.
"Ah, you're up," mom smiled when I walked down the stairs and flopped down on a chair.
"I am," I muttered. I was still wearing the same skinny jeans and red polo shirt I'd had on all day, and my light brown hair was a knotted mess.
My mom seemed to notice this and scowled at my hair, as if snake might suddenly pop out of that tangle and eat her alive.
Which…You know, is still a possibility.
"Hey, bugs need a home too," I stated, getting another scowl. "Alright, alright," I rolled my eyes.
"Yes, go tidy up before the party starts," she looked at the clock. 6:30. She sighed with relief.
WHOA. HOLD IT. My brain has clicked on for once. Hadn't my clock read 6:58 not too long ago?
And that's when it struck me.
"Uh…Mom?" I chuckled nervously.
"Um…Oh, how to put it…Ah…That clock…Is kinda…Just a little…It's maybe…Uh, behind by thirty minutes."
She dropped the dish she was washing and turned her head very, very slowly.
"…" she looked at me with an expressionless face.
"Oh, god…I think I killed her," I walked up to her and poked her shoulder.
"WHAAAAAAT?" she roared, blowing my long brown hair back. "GET IN THE CAR, KATIE!" she clutched my shoulder and shoved me towards the entrance, to where I hopped/stumbled/tripped to the car door.
Have I told you how she loves that party?
She bolted through the door, keys in hand, and jumped through the window into the car seat. Alright, no she didn't, but how cool would it be if she did? I'll tell you:
Very. Very cool indeed.
"Let's go," she said, and pulled the car out of the garage, going about 10000 miles and hour.
Now, my house is about ten minutes away from the party, but after ignoring some red lights, exceeding the speed limit by 500 and running over a few geezers trying to cross the road (just kidding, don't get your pants in a knot), we managed to get there right in time for the assigning of homes.
You see, the boys come over to practice a little and then play finals, right? But they've got to stay somewhere, don't they? Well, they stay at people's houses. That's right, people they don't know. And since by now you can tell how enthusiastic my mother is about these things, she signed us up. Oh, goody.
We pulled into the parking lot of the school and hurried out the door. Or rather, she hurried out the door, dragging me along. I'd tried my best to fix my hair on the way, but some rebel knots had refused to go, so I was still pretty much looking like crap.
"GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!" the voice on the speaker boomed over the thousands of over-enthusiastic people in the crowd.
"WHOOO!" my mother punched the air like an excited six-year-old about to get her puppy.
"Mom, not so loud," I flushed as some guys turned to look at us as in what-the-hell-is-that-crazy-old-hag-think-she's-doing? And I couldn't have said it better myself.
Oh, incase you were wondering, yeah. My name is Katie, but my mother prefers to go by 'Nana'. Why the hell does she call me something so absolutely pointless and rather annoying? The world will never know.
"Nana, if you're going to be this obnoxious, then just go wait in the car. It won't take too long," she shooed me away and turned back to her beloved party.
I stuck out my tongue. Me? Obnoxious? Nah.
I slipped out of the crowd and headed for the car again. I started humming a Rihanna song as I unlocked the car and stepped inside, turning on the little lamp inside since it was getting dark. I pulled out a little mirror we always keep in the car and nearly shrieked when I saw my reflection.
That wasn't me staring back. That was Medusa.
I fumbled inside my little purse for any sort of remedy, until I found a comb. My light brown hair is naturally silky, falling in loose waves over my shoulders.
Except those weren't hairs on my head anymore.
I combed and combed and combed until my scalp practically cried blood for me to stop. At least I looked better now. WAY better.
Not two minutes passed before I heard someone approach. I unlocked the car and peeked through the window, to see mom walking towards me. I got out of the car and opened the door for her, since she was carrying some important-looking papers.
"Ah, Nana, there you are!" she smiled when she saw me and hurried over.
"So, did heaven take mercy on my soul or is a sweaty gross soccer idiot staying over?" I asked, making her frown.
"That gross sweaty soccer idiot would be me," someone called behind me, making me jump ten feet in the air.
"Ah, yes. Nana, this is Nick. Nick, Nana. And what a handsome young man we got," she motioned behind me, and I turned my head to see what she meant.
And my heart flipped over. There, standing with a ball under his arm, was ZE CUTEST guy I'd ever seen. He had dirty blond hair in loose curls that fell down to his gray eyes, and a freckle or two sprawled across his face. He was wearing his soccer uniform shirt with jeans and sneakers.
He smirked, showing his perfect white teeth. "Nana?"
"Yes. This is my daughter, Nick. You too seem about the same age," she commented, while I stupidly stared at him.
He quirked an eyebrow. "What? Fallen for me already?"
Now that snapped me back to reality, "You wish!" I scoffed, crossing my arms across my chest.
"Well you were looking at me pretty fondly there," he pointed. Thank Buddha it was so dark, or he could've seen me blush a little.
"You've got something on your teeth," I protested, making him close his mouth. BOOYAH!
"Well what is that supposed to be?" he pointed to my hair, which I grabbed defensively.
"Yeah? Well your breath stinks of garlic!" I yelled, even though I had no idea what he had for lunch.
"Your clothes are hideous!"
"You are hideous!"
"Your face is hideous!"
"Your…Ah…" I stammered, looking for a noun to be accused of being hideous. He smiled in victory.
"Nana," my mother warned, as if this jerk and his stupid existence required all the respect in the world.
I sighed. "Alright, pleasure meeting you, Nick, but I'm afraid me and my mother must depart. See ya later," I waved and got into the car, slamming the door behind me.
"Oh, you're not getting rid of me that easily," he smiled again, his gray eyes shining with mischief.
"Oh, god," I looked at my mother, who was gazing at Nick proudly, as if she'd won him in a contest. "No, mom. Don't tell me…"
"Nick, get in the car," she said, and my insides crashed down as my brain understood what had happened.
I would be spending around a WHOLE WEEK with this sweaty pig. Oh god.
SO, DID YOU LOVE IT? IS IT EVERYTHING YOU HOPED FOR AND MORE? :D:D
Well, the second chapter will be up in a little while, I guess. I mean, I've already got 18 chapters ready, but I want to keep the suspense MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
Bob, do NOT interrupt me when I'm laughing like a maniac. Have I taught you nothing?