|The Inevitable Life of Ben
Author: Literature Freak PM
Ben, a College Sophomore, lives in a frat house on campus along with Ethan, but when Ben notices an odd change in Ethan's behavior he decides to become good friends with him, but he never imagined to get as close to him as he did. M/M SlashRated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 29,189 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 03-25-12 - Published: 09-08-11 - id: 2950468
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N Well it has been forever since I updated anything. I am terribly sorry, but I go through random writing binges when I will write constantly, but there are times (like this one) where I just can't, and don't, want to write anything. I am back on a writing binge so the updates will be fast.
I like this chapter, and this one is just part one of their date. The next, one or two, chapter(s) will be more of their date. I plan on going into detail with it.
I don't know how much longer this story will be, I plan on it being long because there is still so much that I want to happen. Also this chapter gives you insight into both of their, Ben and Ethan, home lives. More of that will come up in later chapters.
So onto the chapter! Also thank you to everyone who is reading, altering, reviewing, and favoriting! You guys are awesome, and don't let anyone tell you different!
On the way back to Sam I told him how she and I became really good friends over the past day. I didn't tell him about everything I have been dealing with though. I didn't want this day to turn bad in a matter of seconds. I didn't think that that would happen, but I wanted to be careful. I would eventually tell him, but I knew that now was not the time.
When we got back to Sam all she wanted to talk about was the clothing she bought. I wasn't sure if she saw us holding hands, but if she did then she didn't care about that right now. "Ben! Look what I bought," she said excitedly while digging through one of her ten bags looking for something to show me. "You just have to see these shoes I bought! They're in here somewhere."
"Sam," I said while moving my head in the direction of Ethan. She didn't respond, "Sam."
She looked up and saw Ethan, "Oh, hey Ethan." She went right back to digging through one of her other bags, "Found them!" She pulled out a pair of shoes that looked like normal, nice, dress shoes. I didn't see anything special about them. "Aren't they amazing?"
"Yeah, totally," hopefully she didn't catch my hint of sarcasm hidden in there.
"I knew you would like them," she exclaimed while putting the shoes back in the bag. When she was done she got back up right and looked at us. "So what's new with you two?" I lifted my hand intertwined with Ethan's up so she could see. "Okay, so I'm guessing that everything is as it should be now?"
"Yeah, come on though, we should go back home. Unless there is something you need to do," I addressed the last part to Ethan.
He looked around quick, "No, I think I am all good."
"Okay then, let's go."
We made our way back to my car listening to Sam talk all about the amazing deals she found, the whole time dodging the question of how much all of this cost her. "Come on Sam. How much did this all cost you," I asked.
"You don't want to know."
"Obviously I do, or else I wouldn't keep asking you. Do you really think I will care?"
"Fine, but I am not happy about telling you."
She came over to my ear and whispered it into my ear. My jaw dropped. "You better be kidding Sam."
"I'm not," she sounded sad.
"Sam how are you going to pay that off, you do not have a job!"
She said while getting into the back seat of the car, "Well I haven't figured that part out yet."
I made her sit in the back because I wanted Ethan to sit up front with me. He said that he didn't mind sitting in the back, but I insisted that Sam sit back there. He was finally with me and I didn't want to let him out of my sight for a while.
We dropped Sam off at Tri Delta and then drove back home to Kappa Sig. I was afraid of what the brothers might do if they found out about Ethan and me. I wasn't even sure if something might even develop between us. Maybe this was just a fling that won't even last long, but if we did end up becoming a couple then the brothers will eventually find out and I am not sure how they will react. I trust them, but I am not sure how they would feel about a gay couple in the house.
I decided to just let this relationship run its course and when the brothers find out, or we decide that they should, then Ethan and I will handle it together.
I turned off the car and Ethan and I just sat there. I turned and looked at him, "We need to act like there is nothing weird going on, okay?"
He put his hand on the door handle, "Yeah, sure." He didn't seem so sure about that statement, and he sounded a little angry, but I decided I would ask him about that, and why he was acting weird yesterday and today, whenever I got time to talk to him, alone.
We got out of the car and walked into the house. I was scared, but who wouldn't be? I am not a very good liar, at all. If I try to lie I will eventually get overcome with a bombard of giggles, thus causing any hope of my lie actually being convincing to be thrown out the window. I think I would be able to pull off a bigger lie, but I was hoping that my giggle fit would not take control of me.
I noticed that when we got into the house that the guys did not even seem to notice, well the ones downstairs. They were all doing their own thing, but if they did notice they probably didn't care. "Hey, guys, look who I found. I know that all of you were worried so much," I said to get their attention.
Ethan said into my ear, "Were they really worried about where I was?"
"Nope," I said back.
"Douches," he said then went upstairs to his room.
"Where was he," John asked from the couch without breaking his line of vision away from the TV.
"Some abandoned park in a town close to here," I responded with while making my way back up to room.
I walked by Ethan and Conner's room and he was laying on his bed with his head buried into his pillow. Conner was nowhere to be seen, but that didn't really surprise me. I stood in the doorway and lightly knocked on his door. I heard a muffled "go away" from him.
"It's me," I said.
"Hello 'me,' my name is Ethan. Come by later."
"Okay, I guess I'll come by later then."
I wanted to ask him if something was wrong, but I didn't want to jeopardize this relationship already. I feel like I shouldn't care about him this much already considering the fact that we have only been dating for less than two hours.
I went to my room and turned my laptop on. When it was booting up I went took off my shoes and looked for Conner's sociology notes that Ethan printed out for me. I sat down on my bed and logged into my computer. I opened up my sociology notes word file and then opened up iTunes. I found my playlist for note taking and started to play that.
For the next hour and a half I copied the thorough notes that Conner took and felt the slow, but painless, death of my brain over the sociology of education. I love sociology, but the notes that Conner takes just make me want to kill myself. I decided that from now on I am going to remember to bring my laptop to class.
Once I was done with taking notes I messed around on my computer for a while and the next time I looked at the time it was 4:26. I basically spent three hours doing nothing important.
I decided that I did not want to spend the evening in the house and figured that I was going to have fun tonight. I changed my shirt into something nicer, plaid button-down, and got my car keys, wallet, and phone. I went over to Ethan's room and saw that he was in the same position that I left him four and a half hours ago.
This time I didn't knock, I just went in, closed the door, and sat on his bed. "What do you want," I got greeted with in a sleepy tone.
"Come on, get up."
He turned his head and looked at me in half-closed eyes, "Why?"
"You and I are going out"
"Weren't we just out this morning," he asked while he rubbed his eyes.
"Yes, but tonight we are going on a special outing."
He yawned, "Like a date?"
"Well, yeah, but I wasn't sure if you wanted me to say it," I said while standing up.
"Can't we do this another time? I'm tired."
Well that was like an arrow being shot through my heart. "Well I guess we can, but I just thought we could do something fun tonight instead of being here the whole night."
"Well that would be a lot more fun than being here."
Twenty minutes later we were in my car and driving to a local restaurant that no one from our school goes to. 'Too expensive' and 'Too nice' they say. Well I say "fuck them," more food for me.
"So Ethan, have you ever been to Elegant Susie's before?" Elegant Susie's is the name of the restaurant, I don't like it.
"Once, my parents took me there the day I moved into my dorm room. That was the last time my parents and I ate together," he got a sudden look of sadness on his face.
"Why, if you don't mind me asking that is."
He was looking out the car window, it was raining, "I don't mind. To be perfectly honest I don't know why. I thought we were a happy family, but then I came here and we just drifted apart. I used to talk to them every day, but then one day that just stopped. No explanation, nothing. I was never as close to my dad as I was to my mom, but now they are just as distant. I like to think that it was just because I am six hours away from home, but a part of me thinks that it is because of something I did. I don't what I could have done though."
He just told me something that I think he never told to anyone before. I felt like I should tell him something that I never told to anyone before, but I wasn't sure what. I put my hand on his, "I'm really sorry man. I'm sure there is an explanation though."
"Yeah, I think there is one too, but there is a part of me that doesn't want to know because it could be worse than any of the ones that I have in my mind."
I took my hand away, "The only reason my parents are still together is because of my brother."
He turned and faced me, "Why? Is it because he is deaf?"
"Yeah, that is what I think. I don't know why they would be afraid to get a divorce. Yeah, a divorce can be hard for a kid, but he is eleven years old. I think he can handle it."
We got stopped at a red light, "Well a divorce affects each child differently."
"I think he knows," the light turned green. "A couple months before I left, for here, I would hear them at night arguing. At first it was about things like money, or work. Things that are normal for people to argue about, but about two months before I left they would argue about stupid things. Things like one of them forgetting to close a cabinet door when they left the kitchen or my dad leaving the toilet seat up. I think that they just got so accustomed to arguing that not doing it was too abnormal for them, so then they found excuses to argue. Obviously he couldn't hear them, but he catches onto things easily. He probably noticed the broken cabinet that wasn't there the day before, or the fact that my parents sleep in separate rooms."
"We both have messed up families, don't we," he said while running his finger over the top of my hand that was lying on the arm rest.
"Yeah, I think so. One day I just want to go home and take Gregory out of there. It's not like he is going to get hurt there, my parents would never hurt him, but he deserves so much better."
"You really love and care about him, don't you?"
"Yeah, more than anything in the whole world," right after I said that a smile appeared on my face and thoughts of my brother swarmed through my head. I wanted Ethan to meet him.
I pulled into the parking lot of Elegant Susie's and was eager to be able to talk to Ethan and get to know him a lot more. I wanted to know everything about him, his favorite color, movie, childhood memory, food, what shampoo he used, everything. There was one question that kept creeping to the front of my mind that I was afraid to ask myself. Is what I am feeling just lust, or love?
I parked my car, got out, and went over to Ethan's side, quickly, before he got out. I wanted to be a gentleman and open his car door for him. Chivalry isn't dead, and even though it may be just a saying that girls say to guys I was going to change the use to be universal in the world of relationships.
He got out and thanked me for opening his door for him. He didn't seem too thrilled to be here right now. "Ethan, do you want to be here with me right now," I asked while we walked to the entrance.
He put his hands in his pockets, "Yeah, I do, why?"
"You just don't seemed too thrilled to be here right now."
"I'm sorry. I do want to be here, I'm just tired, that's all."
We got to the entrance and I held the door open for him, "So maybe this wasn't a good idea to do this tonight?"
"No, Ben, this was a good idea."
A perky waitress greeted us when we entered. Her nametag said that her name is Cindy and I wondered if she was always perky or if that was just the way that her boss told her to act. "Hi, welcome to Elegant Susie's! Table for two?"
She looked down at the electronic pad she was holding in her arms and clicked on something on the screen. She took two menus from the podium next to the entrance to the dining room. "Right this way, gentlemen," she said and led us to a table that was in the middle of the dining room and close to the wall. "Is here okay?"
"Yes it is, thank you very much," I said and pulled out Ethan's chair for him.
"What will you two want to drink? We have Coke and Pepsi products, water, iced tea, beer, wine, mixed drinks."
"We will have a bottle of Red Wine and I will also like a glass of water. Ethan what do you want to drink," I asked him while glancing over in his direction.
"Water too will be fine," he responded.
Cindy wrote down our beverage order and asked me, "Okay, I will just need to see some I.D. first. I am sorry that I have to do that, not that I don't think you are 21, but it is just company policy."
I gave her a small smile, "it's fine," and took out my wallet. I got out my fake I.D. and gave it to her.
She looked at it then back at me before she gave it back, "Okay, I will be back shortly with your drinks."
She walked away; I put my elbows on the table and my head in my hands. I looked at Ethan and he smiled. "I hope you don't mind that I am being a gentleman tonight," I said.
"I don't, I think it's cute."
I took my head out of my hands and smiled at him, "Oh, really now?"
He crossed his arms, "Yeah, it is adorable. I like that you are trying to impress me."
"Well I feel like I need to."
He gave me a confused look, "Why?"
What could I say? What should I say? I didn't want him to think that I am loser, but I want to be honest. "I don't want you to think that I don't care, I want this date to be perfect."
Cindy came back with two wine glasses, the bottle of wine, and our waters. "So can I take your orders?"
Oh shit, we forgot to look at the menus. "We are going to need some more time," I told her.
She smiled, "Okay, that's fine. I'll be back in a few minutes."
She walked away and I said to Ethan, "Order whatever you want, no matter what the price is."
"Ben, you don't have to do that, but since you are giving me that option I am going to order the most expensive thing on here," he said and picked up his menu.
I picked up mine, "You can and I won't think any less of you."
Five minutes later Cindy was back asking for our orders. "I will have the lobster in a garlic butter sauce and an oil and vinegar dressing for my salad," I said.
She wrote down my order, "Okay, and what can I get for you sir," she said addressing Ethan.
"I will have the mushroom and cheese stuffed pasta and caeser dressing for my salad."
She wrote it down and said, "Okay, I will put those in for you two right away," and then turned around and left.
I opened the bottle of wine and reached over to get Ethan's wine glass. I poured some in and passed it over to him, "Thanks," he said. I then poured some into mine.
I picked up my glass and said, "A toast, to a good day." Ethan picked up his and clinked his glass off of mine. I took a sip and set my glass down.
"I want this date to be perfect too," he said after he set his glass down.
I was confused until I realized that he was responding to when I said that I want this date to be perfect. "I'm not sure how perfect I want it to be though," I said while looking at him.
He drank another sip of wine, "What do you mean?"
I was flicking the edge of my napkin, "If it is too perfect then I have the feeling that we will no longer find each other interesting later on. If it is not perfect then I feel that we end up not seeing each other anymore. I don't want that considering the fact that we have only been together for a couple hours."
"I know what you mean and I don't want those to happen."
"So what should we do? Should we make this date perfect?"
He thought for a moment, "Why the fuck not? Let's just let what happens, happen. Let's just let this relationship run its course. If it lasts a week, let it last a week and let's not question it. If it lasts our whole lives then let's let it. Let this relationship be an adventure, we won't know how it is going to end until we get there."
I smiled at him, the biggest smile so far, "I like the way you think Ethan Carter."
"I like you Benjamin Foster."
We stayed like that for a while longer, both of us looking at each other, our gazes moving from each other's lips, eyes, arms. I reached over and put my hand on his, but he drew his away. "What's wrong," I asked.
"Nothing, I'm just afraid," he put his hand on his other arm.
"Afraid about what, someone seeing us?"
He looked down at his legs, "Yeah…"
"Don't worry, it's okay. I only just came out to someone last night, I'm afraid too, but I don't there is anyone here that knows us. If you don't want to show affection in here, that's fine."
He looked at me, "Really, you don't mind?"
"Ethan, I want you to be comfortable in this relationship. I don't want you to be afraid or feel ashamed."
"Give me time, this is something that I have been struggling with for a long time."
What has he been struggling with, his sexuality or his feelings for me? I wanted to ask him, but I didn't want to pry this early into the relationship. "I will give you as much time as you need."
"Thank you Ben, I have a feeling that you are too good for me."
"Maybe I am, but I don't mind," I smiled.
Cindy came back with our food and both of ours looked and tasted delicious. Ethan and I sat there, eating and talking, tasting each other's food and laughing. I felt myself slowly open up to him and I was enjoying his company. I also felt that he was slowly becoming more comfortable in his body, but I knew that it would take time and I was prepared to wait with him.