|Swallow the White Feather
Author: Honunjama PM
SLASH MXM After his parent's death, Alexander is sent away to boarding school, where he discovers the boy he falls for isn't all that he seems. And that's just the beginning...something lives in the tunnels beneath the school and it isn't just The Dark.Rated: Fiction M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 37,922 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 04-04-12 - Published: 11-02-11 - id: 2966685
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
AN: I'm sorry this is short, I kinda lost my muse for a bit- but I've figured a little romance cures those inspirational low points- and it's not like I don't know where this is going (I have everything planned until la fin) but that doesn't always help either!
Thanks for the reviews, please keep them coming, they give me inspiration too ^^
Grey's living room was dimly lit and cozy, full of soft rounded shadows and warm amber light. It felt safe, Alexander felt safe. It was the sort of place bad things didn't happen in, the sort of place you could sit and listen to bad news on the radio and know it wasn't real because it couldn't touch you, it couldn't happen to you, not here.
As Grey knelt down to light the electric bar fire, Alexander sank down into the only armchair and cradled his warm cup. He felt awful. Tired and awful and his head was thumping. Why was it he didn't just go to sleep tonight again? Sleep was a really good idea and going out tonight had just been ...a really bad one. Right now anything else but sleep seemed a really bad idea.
Si leaned over and held out a tin of biscuits.
"Eat. You'll feel better."
Alexander felt like telling him to fuck off, Si was the reason his head was banging after all. But he took a biscuit and shoved it into his mouth, chewing and swallowing without even tasting it. Which was weird, he thought mid-swallow.
Since his senses were now so heightened, he'd begun to get used to tasting everything a little more, not a little less and never not at all.
The touch of panic he felt at losing his increased sensory abilities surprised him, so he leaned forward and grabbed another biscuit. Grey glanced up at the movement and gave him a look he felt he was on the verge of understanding but couldn't quite make out.
"Relax, Alexander. Just relax." Grey smiled, and Alexander sank back in the chair.
As Si began to talk, Alexander found the lilt in his accent to be a little hypnotic and he listened in a sort of semi- awake semi-dreaming state where everything that was said shone really clearly in his mind and then promptly vanished, or took him off on deep tangent inside himself.
Surprisingly, Si didn't leave out the part where he'd hit Alexander over the head, or the fact that he'd shoved him back against the wall. He didn't make himself sound good at all, and Grey just listened silently. It made Alexander wonder what it would be like to be with someone who would just accept you, every little thing about you, who would try and understand if you made a mistake and not try to fix you as if you were in some way broken. He had little experience of positive adult relationships like this, his parents had always fought. Admittedly they'd tried not to do it in front of him or his sister but the battle for the upper hand in their relationship had been a constant tension in his childhood.
The sofa was long but, with eyes half slitted, Alexander could just about make out Si curling himself affectionately round Grey, half in his lap. Absentmindedly, Grey stroked Si's silky red hair and the older boy almost purred. It was strange to see Si so completely smitten, and although Alexander could sense the deep feelings Grey held for him, his actions toward the faerie in his arms were casual and nonchalant, completely non-possessive, as if he knew that's what he needed. Alexander imagined that Si must have spent his whole life being the object of someones fantasy and that maybe it was a relief to be with someone so undemanding. Suddenly it struck Alexander that maybe Micah wanted something similar, it was true he seemed to find unsolicited attention oppressive, so maybe treating him with the same relaxed unfocused interest would have him eating out of his hand. Not that that was what he wanted, Alexander reprimanded himself, not after what had happened with Dominic.
The bar fire warmed the cold room quickly, and Alexander felt himself slipping deeper. It would be nice to have Dominic here to curl round him, it would be nice to stroke his golden hair. Even though he had seen him only a few hours ago, he missed his easy warmth. Warmth that had nothing to do with bar fires or body heat.
Grey's voice brought his attention back into the room. "Okay, I will go down to the cavern tomorrow and seal the way more permanently. I have nothing prepared now." He added catching Si's briefly distressed look. "They won't just come and take him, you know that, they have no idea about the lay of the place or how many of us there are or even where exactly he is. I'll take Alexander back to the dorm and Micah will be safe tonight." Grey tilted Si's chin up and kissed him softly.
Alexander looked on, too sleepy to feel uncomfortable. And why should he feel uncomfortable he argued dreamily, just because he'd never seen two men kissing in real life, never mind that he'd actually kissed Dominic, done more than kiss.
He couldn't work it out.
Then he smiled to himself, they think I'm asleep.
He looked on as Grey's hand cupped Si's jaw and pulled him closer to deepen their kiss. In the soft light, Si's skin had taken on a strange glowing quality that seem to be increasing in intensity and was mesmerising to watch. Of it's own accord, his hand seemed to hover in the air, unsure of where to place itself, until it eventually tangled in Grey's hair. Without breaking their kiss, the faerie moved to straddle Grey's lap and Grey's hands gripped his arse so firmly as he yanked him forwards, it caused Si to break to kiss and just gasp. Their arousal filled his senses, and even though he didn't want either of them, it turned him on.
That they were both holding back, trying to be soundless, turned him on too and Alexander unconsciously rubbed against his erection with the inside of his wrist. Grey seemed to notice this slight movement and glanced in Alexander's direction. Belatedly and a little embarrassingly, Alexander realised he must be able to scent such things too.
Alexander looked up. Something was way out of whack with his senses, he'd neither heard nor scented Dominic's approach. Yet up close, the boy's scent was heady and irresistible and Alexander had trouble doing anything but smile. It was true he was tired and anxious, but he'd been tired and anxious so many times over the past six months that he'd have thought it was a normal state of being by now. He made a mental note to ask Grey if this waxing and waning of his senses was normal.
"Thought I'd wait for you." Dominic said sitting down on the hard plastic chair next to him.
Alexander shifted ever so slightly closer and breathed deeply. Yeah, he could do with this boy's comforting presence right now.
He'd been sat outside the governors room in the main school building for half an hour waiting for them to put him out of his misery and call him in.
Timms had gone in twenty or so minutes ago, and Alexander couldn't decide whether that was a good or a bad thing.
And worst of all, however much he strained his ears, he could make out no voices, no movement, nothing, beyond that heavy wooden door.
He guessed it was around lunch time, although it seemed a little early- there was no way Dominic would get away with sneaking out of lessons to sit here with him...unless it was Grey's lesson...
"Have you just come out of English?"
Dominic grinned sheepishly and waved the thin paperback book in his hands- a dog-eared copy of 'Animal Farm'.
"Grey thought I'd probably concentrate better here. Why didn't you tell me you thought they were going to expel you last night?"
"Couldn't face talking about it... sorry." He winced, there were much better ways to apologise, just not here in the school corridor.
All at once the heavy door beside them creaked open, and a voice rang out, commanding and loud. "Alexander Lloyd? We will see you now."
"So, what did they say? You can't just keep me in suspense, it's fucking killing me!" Dominic yelled.
Alexander grinned and raced ahead across the green away from the school buildings, knowing full well that Dominic would follow.
Everything out here smelt divine- like fucking heaven. All wild grey/greenness above and around them and sweet decaying earth beneath their feet. Even the way the sunlight drifted through the leafless branches was somehow divine. It was a beautiful, beautiful day.
"So, if you're not going to tell me what happened, can you at least tell me where we 're going?" Dominic asked, still slightly out of breath from chasing after Alexander.
Alexander stopped weaving through the densely packed trees behind the swimming pool and shrugged. "We can go back and get lunch if you want...I just though this might be more... fun?"
Dominic touched his shoulder and slowly spun him round.
"You thought a walk in the woods with me might be fun?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Alexander fluttered his eyelashes in mock flirtatiousness. And Dominic grabbed his hand and yanked him forwards, pulling him deeper into the wood.
To be honest, he liked Dominic taking charge and dragging him through the wood. He had no idea if Dominic knew where he was going and he didn't care, the tension and anticipation was building between them with every swiftly taken step. And he liked being in the woods, he liked it more than anything.
A little way before the eerie little lake Si had drawn him to, Dominic stopped and looked round.
Immediately Alexander could see what caught his eye- a thick bed of moss, just the right size to lie on, between two large fallen tree trucks- and he smiled.
"You look like you need a lie down." Dominic said, advancing toward him.
Alexander shook his head.
"No, I'm good, thanks." He said, before bursting out laughing, grabbing Dominic and swinging him down onto the moss.
It was stupid to think this way, but he liked who he was with Dominic. He was silly and carefree...he crouched down carefully and leaned into Dominic's open arms, smiling as he traced the other boy's lips with his fingertips until a sudden realisation struck him so hard his breath caught in his throat... it was so obvious and yet...such a shock.
"What?" Dominic asked softly, puzzled by Alexander's wide-eyed gaze.
Alexander shook his head, trying to blink all those thoughts away, thoughts about Dominic, thoughts about falling in love. But they just wouldn't go.
He swallowed, before giving in a little.
"You're beautiful." He said croakily, meaning it.
Dominic's eyelashes lay sooty black against his cheek as he glanced down, and a soft blush spread across the top of his cheeks.
"Kiss me." He whispered.
And Alexander did, searchingly, deeply afraid of the overwhelming feelings surrounding them both and clinging on to Dominic so tightly he never wanted to let go.
He was afraid when Dominic gently pushed him away so he could touch his face, fingers grazing his lips, his eyes, eyebrows, as if checking he was real. He was afraid of the look in Dominic's eyes when he sat up and pulled Alexander closer.
He was afraid when Dominic said. "I've never felt like this before. It's really fucking scary isn't it?"
He knew he looking fucking scared.
"Tell me you're not being expelled."
"I'm not being expelled." He answered quickly.
Dominic gave a quick smile of relief before dipping his head down to lay it on Alexander's shoulder.
"Tell me you don't feel this way about Micah." Dominic whispered against his neck in a single warm breath that made him shiver.
"I don't feel this way about Micah." he murmured into Dominic's hair. He wasn't sure how he felt about Micah but, well, no, it wasn't like this.
And then Alexander did something he would regret. He let all those terrifying feelings he felt for Dominic mingle with other feelings he had been successfully ignoring until that second, feelings that linked him with the wood and the earth and everything around them. Feelings that were just as intense and powerful, and with a jolt he pushed his hands into the moss and connected to it all.
Everything inside him expanded, and it hurt. Rocking on his hands and knees he tried to disconnect, lift his hands away and stand but he felt sucked in place. It wasn't going to let go of him that easily. Dominic was talking animatedly, worriedly, but he couldn't hear him clearly, all he could hear was the white noise of the wind, the groan of the trees above him. And now, it wasn't just the trees and the earth he felt connected to, there was an undercurrent of something else, something much stronger and older- the Presence from the tunnels. It didn't want to hurt him, but he had to fight it, it wanted to take over, it wanted to take him. Compelled to look up, he realised alarmingly that he couldn't really see Dominic, although the boy was just in front of him, what he saw instead were what he could only describe as ghosts filling the wood all around. Intangible faerie ghosts with wings and indistinct features, light like Elrizel's burning brightly from their centres. But unlike Elrizel with his black wings and hair, they were full of colour, iridescence and such bright bright light...
I'm not strong enough, he thought hopelessly. The light was all around him. I'm not strong enough. He collapsed and gave in, letting the feelings rush through him like a swollen river breaching it's banks. And all his senses were flooded.
Let me know what you think ^^