Author: IrregularHonour PM
Tongue in cheek ballad detailing ordinary events with a pair of kittens.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Poetry/Humor - Words: 374 - Published: 11-22-11 - Status: Complete - id: 2972979
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23rd November 2011
"Come!" saith Kitten, unto his furry friend
"Let us play within the shadows for there you may depend
we'll have fun and adventure where'ere we lay our paw
and there get up to mischief- of that you may be sure!"
So they ran to the lantana bush with both their tails upright
and just as soon as they both reached it of a sudden had a fright
-For two hands reached down from nowhere and plucked them from the ground
"Oh such naughty kittens were there ever to be found!
It's not safe within the shadows- for there outside my care
Are snakes and awful creatures that will give to thee a scare
And worse indeed will they do for they tend unto thy hurt
and now I must restrain thee for thou runnest all beserk."
And so the mistress claimed them, and clutched them to her chest
And took them back into her house- and there it is confessed
She spoiled them all rotten, and ruled the roost did they
Until their master came and stopped the kittens play.
He squirted them with water, for cantankerous was he
With kittens who were naughty, so he made the kittens flee
And then mistress was all troubled, for it grieved her softened heart
To see her darling kittens squirted cruelly with such art
So she then protested, and master shook his head
"I care not what thou thinkest! They must stay off the bed!"
"But I love them!" So she cried and mourned, but inflexible was he
And persisted squirting, and making kittens flee
At last a cunning, fiendish plan the mistress did conceive
"I'll make them mind with him here, so then he will believe
They never are naughty, therefore he will stay
His hand from kittens ruling, and so at peace are they!"
But kittens are kittens ever, and choose not time or place
For naughtiness or temper, and and so he still released
Upon them jets of water, and so mistress must still mourn
Until he goes and leaves them peacefully 'till dawn.
And then the kittens bless her with purring and with prod
And they all curl up together within the land of Nod.