Chapter 7: "Because the good stuff is always behind the crappy harem anime!"

Saturday was quite uneventful. The most Shion and Alice did was finish up on class assignments. It took them five hours to get it done, mainly thanks to their constant procrastination. As for Benkei, he was busy messing around with his laptop, researching on human reproduction, which is his way of saying watching porn. Reiji wasn't anywhere to be seen.

vvvvvvvvvvv

Sunday: Girl's dorm room 47

"Arisu! Wake up! It's 12:30!" Shion shouted as she shook Alice. "C'mon, you said you wanted to go to that cafe!"

"Uh..." Alice rolled over, facing the direction opposite of Shion. "5 minutes..."

"That's what you said 30 minutes ago..." Shion tried to hold a smile on her face. "C'mon, wake up! (Geez, if this was Benkei, I'd so hit it! I mean hit her. I wouldn't hit it. Heheh... I've been hanging around that perv for too long...)"

Alice started to mumble about, her eyes still shut. "Dragon eyeballs are tasty..."

Shion sighed. She grabbed Alice's blanket and threw it off. "Stop snuggling about... The train would be packed at this rate..."

Alice started to open her eyes a little. She could see Shion, though the image is quite blurry. "Sh-Shion...?"

"You sleepyhead... Do you always sleep this badly? I thought you had that alarm clock set." Shion pointed at an alarm clock right by the bed.

Alice sat up, still a little sleepy. She rubbed her eyes. "Mmgh... I forgot."

"Geez." Shion smiled, shaking her head. "Go shower. I can see some drool. And you got a bedhead. And your pyjamas is all wrinkled."

Alice blushed. She wiped her mouth, combed her hair with her bare hand and inspected the pyjamas she wore, which is a thin silk dress. She got off her bed and left the room to take a shower.

Now, since a shower scene would be something Benkei would want, I'll skip 15 minutes.

Alice came back, wearing a towel over her body, covering only her chest to her thighs. Shion was sitting on an office chair right in front of the study table when she entered. She spun it around, "Finally back, eh?"

Alice nodded at her.

"Hehe, wouldn't this be something Benkei would want to see?" Shion rolled her eyes. "Then again, that was quick. For a girl. Don't you put on make-up or do stuff to your hair?"

"No..." Alice shook her head.

"Really? But you look pretty. I'm jealous..." Shion's eyes widened. She was staring at Alice's face which was slowly turning red.

"T-thanks..." Alice looked away.

"Anyway!" Shion stood up from her chair, kicking it away. "You gonna get dressed?"

"Y-yeah!" Alice stuttered, her face still red.

She pulled her luggage from under the bed. She then unzipped it, and flipped it upside-down, throwing all of its contents on the floor, piling it up like a garbage dump.

"Creative..." Shion narrowed her eyes. She pointed at a cupboard located right next t the door. "Hey, don't you keep your clothes in that cupboard?"

"I didn't want to take your space..." Alice replied as she searched for her clothes.

Shion laughed and opened the cupboard, revealing only 3 red capes and 4 pairs of pants in it. "It's practically empty!"

Alice tilted her head. A thought had hit her. "You don't wear anything else...?"

"Yeeeep." Shion rubbed her neck. "I don't really care about fashion. Besides, I have to wear this, at all times."

"Why...?" Alice was curios.

"It's a little dumb." Shion sighed. "So... What are you going to wear?"

She looked at all the clothes Alice had on the floor. She noticed one thing. They were all really flashy dresses. Dresses a celebrity would wear to a major event. The least flashy one looked like a wedding dress!

Naturally, Shion brought it up. "Alice...? Don't you have anything... Casual?"

"These ARE casual..." Alice turned around, pouting.

"They look really fancy." Shion grinned. "Are they even comfortable? They look rather... Form-fitting."

"Well, back at home, my parents forced me to wear these kinds of clothes 24/7... So I'm used to it." Alice kept searching through the pile.

"We'll stand out if you wear that." Shion frowned.

"(Doesn't girl in a cape and a guy in a tuxedo stand out enough?)" Alice thought. "So... What do I wear?"

"School uniform?" Shion suggested. "I mean, Gekkoukan is also famous for it's stylish uniforms. Especially the girl's. Based on an ordinary high school's sailor uniform, but more stylish!" She rolled a piece of paper and held it close to her mouth, like a microphone. "You can go anywhere wearing this!"

"Is this a commercial...?" Alice's mouth was gapping.

"No no no..." Shion tossed the paper aside. "I was explaining to the- Never mind... Just put on your school uniform, it'll be okay."

"On Sunday...?" Alice questioned.

"It's so stylish you can go to an award show and still look good!"

vvvvvvvvvvvvv

Unagi Train Station

Benkei was sitting next to a girl on a bench. He had his arm on her shoulders, a womanizing grin on his face. His eyes were staring into her soul.

"And as you can see..." Benkei said dramatically. "That's how I saved the world from global warming."

"Wow, Benkei. You're amazing." The girl looked at him, her eyes sparkling in awe.

"I know." Benkei smiled at her, his voice started to sound more erotic. "Do you know why this station is called Unagi?"

"Because of the famous Unagi Rolls they sell over there?" She pointed at a stall with the sign, 'Unagi Roll!' nearby. It had a long queue in front of it.

"Pfft, no." He cracked up. "You see, when I was 6 years old, I saved trillions of lives on a train that was out of control. I stopped it with my bare hands and halted the train from... Exploding. But at the cost..."

The girl looked deeper into Benkei's eyes wanting to know what follows.

"I..." Benkei's voice got heavier, indicating sadness. "Can't move my left pinky finger!" He showed her his left hand.

The girl gasped loudly. "That's horrible!"

"I know..." Benkei turned away.

"So, why is it called Unagi then?" The girl questioned.

"Oh!" Benkei flinched. "I lay on that very rail track." He pointed at the rail tracks in front of them. His voice got softer, like he was whispering. "With my final breath... I said... Unagi."

"And you survived!" The girl was impressed.

"Yeah." Benkei nodded with a charming grin on his face.

"That's the most amazing feat I've ever heard of!" The girl laid her head on Benkei's shoulders.

Shion approached them from behind, grabbing both of their shoulders. "It's also made up, and a whole load of crap at that."

"Wh-wha?" The girl turned around and looked at Shion. "What's that supposed to mean."

Shion looked back at her, eye to eye. "This tuxedo wearing playboy is trying to find a way to nail you against a wall."

The girl gasped loudly. She glared angrily at Benkei and stretched her hand out.

"Wait baby, I can explain!" Benkei started to lose his composure.

She slapped him on the cheek. So hard that a red hand print was left on his face. He fell off the bench, sprawled out on the ground.

The girl walked around the bench to Shion. She bowed to her, "Thank you very much for your warning."

"All in a day's work." Shion grinned.

The girl reached into her bag and took out a pen and a piece of paper. She wrote onto it and handed it to Shion, blushing hard. "And... Please take this."

"Huh?" Shion looked at the inscription. It was a bunch of numbers, a phone number, to be precise. "This is a-"

The girl ran off, her face was still red.

"She gave me her phone number, didn't she...?" Shion's jaw was dropping as she saw the girl run away.

"You womanizer, you!" Benkei laughed his ass off, standing up pointing at Shion with both hands. "I can't get a girl's phone number in at least 10 minutes! But you! Whoa! Barely a minute! Amazing! Simply amazing!"

"Are you mocking me?" Shion crumpled the paper and then threw it at Benkei.

He caught it. "Thanks."

Alice walked to them slowly, a small bag slung on her shoulders. She was looking at her surroundings like a tourist. There were benches lined up against one another, the tiled floors were blackened and there was a huge line at the ticket counters. A train had arrived, its engines roaring throughout the station.

"Yo!" Benkei waved at Alice. "Still in your uniform? Nice. Miniskirts are the best."

Shion tried to not be bothered by Benkei. "Quite a line they got there. Lucky we got our student cards, eh? You brought your right?"

Alice and Benkei nodded.

"Great, let's go!" Shion lead them into the train.

vvvvvvvvvvvvv

In the train

After the third stop, the train was packed. The three of them were lucky enough to have a chair to sit on as the crowd got larger and larger. It started to feel hot and stuffy. Alice was gazing out the window, staring at all the buildings the train moved by.

Alice was gazing out the window behind her at the various buildings and trees they passed. Shion looked at her, "Gee, is it your first time on a train?"

Alice sat down normally, her back leaned against the seat. She tried to manage a stoic expression.

"Hey, it's fine." Shion nudged at her. "There's a first time for everything, eh?"

"THIS is a first time for me..." Benkei covered his nose.

Shion looked at his direction and saw a large man in a sleeveless shirt with his arm up. His hairy armpit was facing Benkei, a horrid smell emanating from. She laughed softly.

"This is going to be one LOOOONG ride."

vvvvvvvvvvvv

The three stooges finally got off the train. Only one was extremely relieved to get out of that train, and that one is Benkei. A 12 minute ride felt like a decade, staring down the hairy armpit and enduring the smell.

Shion led Alice to the cafe. Benkei was behind them. He was trying to get a hold of himself, though the ride is over, he could somehow still smell it.

They waded to crowds and crowds of people. The district was crowded. In fact, there weren't any cars in the area as people used the roads to walk. The shops were packed. The people there dressed casually. The sidewalks were blackened by all the shoes that have crossed it.

Alice was staring around. It was her first time seeing all this. There were large signboards put up on buildings and they switched their images at certain intervals. There were trees planted apart from each other, probably to make the area cosier. Every 5 blocks, there would be a bench to sit on.

"Arisu... Walk faster. Don't look around so much." Shion slowed her pace and walked next to Alice.

"Is it you first time here?" Benkei asked.

Alice nodded, knowing full well that Benkei wouldn't be able to hear her amidst the crowd.

"Gee, try getting used to-" Shion said, but stopped when a guy banged into her and dropped his plastic bag.

"S-Sorry!" The messily done purple-haired guy apologised. He kneeled over and picked up his bag, but then a box slipped out.

Shion looked at it and noticed that it was a figurine. She read the name written on it out loud, "Miku Hatsune...?"

The guy cringed and immediately took the box back. He looked at Shion and realized that he recognized her. "Shion...?"

"Oh, hey Suzaku." Shion greeted him back. "Out buying more merchandise?"

"Yeah!" Suzaku grinned. "I don't care if I go broke! I'm buying all sorts of stuff! I'm on a... Spending spree!"

"Otakus..." Benkei scowled.

"Oh yeah!" Suzaku recalled. "Did you see an anime titled... Further Than The Sky?"

"No... Why?" Shion answered.

"The show's over on TV right now and I really want to get the DVD! Did you check behind the crappy harem animes? I mean, the crappy ones, not the good ones." Suzaku tightened his fist, shaking.

"Why should I?" Shion questioned rhetorically.

"Because the good stuff is always behind the crappy harem anime!" Suzaku shouted enthusiastically.

"I really don't dare touch those..." Shion looked away. "Did you see it Benkei?"

"Nope. Besides, I'm not a huge fan of anime." Benkei flailed his wrist, scowling.

"Dammit..." Suzaku gritted his teeth. "I'll go to every store! I'll even go all the way to Akihabara just to find it!" His eyes flared up. He ran through the crowd, tossing away anyone who stood in his path.

Alice tilted her head as she watched his berserk rush. "Who's that...?"

"Suzaku Date." Shion crossed her arms. "Huge otaku. He joined the kendo club because he thought it would be like Bamboo Blade. He's always hooked on some show. These few months, it's Further Than The Sky."

"What's that about...?" Alice asked.

"No clue." Shion shrugged. "I know it has mecha, that's for sure. I only watch one mecha show. I couldn't care less about the others."

"And I don't like giant robots." Benkei rested his hands behind his head. "Besides, that Further Than The Sky sounds like a shitload of crap."

"I don't know." Shion rolled her eyes. "Don't judge a book by its cover. I might look into that show sometime. C'mon, we've stalled enough. To the cafe!" She pointed at the direction they were walking before and led them.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvv

Shion finally stopped walking. This meant that they had arrived. Either that or they bumped into another insane member of the kendo club. Fortunately, it was that. The cafe was right at a corner of a street. It was quite packed too.

Alice read the sign of the cafe. "Starry Dreams Cafe...?"

Benkei nodded. "Yeah, I thought it was one of those no panties cafe, but I was wrong. The food's good though."

Shion crossed her arms and leered at Benkei. "You're not here for the food."

Benkei shrugged. "And I'm not here for the cosplaying chicks either."

Alice was curios. "Then...?"

Shion sighed. "There was this one time this cafe had a maid cosplay day. You see, Benkei met one of the waitresses and fell head over heels in love with her."

Benkei coughed deliberately. "Saying that is pushing it. I only want to get in her pants, er... Skirt. Her frilly skirt. I can still remember that day... Her long silky hair... Those thigh-high knee socks... And her calm yet somewhat shy demeanour... I NEED to get her in bed!"

"Although..." Shion started to walk backwards towards the cafe, facing Alice. "I've never seen such a girl. She's probably part of Benkei's dreams. His wet dreams, to be precise."

"Hey!" Benkei shouted as he and Alice followed Shion. "If it were my wet dreams, I'd have gone and done it with her, along with 5 busty chicks, in playboy bunny outfits! If it were my dream, I'd just lay her."

Shion was twitching. "Yeaaaaah... I asked Sakura. She said no such employee existed."

Benkei raised his voice. "She wasn't there that day!"

"Then maybe it's the manager's cousin or sibling... Or maybe even the chef."

"If it's the chef, I'd marry her." Benkei rubbed his chin. "Girls who can cook are the best! I want to eat every girl's cooking!"

"There's an innuendo buried there somewhere..." Shion turned around and opened the door to the cafe.

The cafe was neatly decorated. There were cubicles by the walls and tables and chairs arranged neatly at the middle. The floor was wooden and the walls were decorated with various pictures. Right by the door were potted plants and a glass wall, which probably doubled as a window.

A girl who either had a long blue wig or just had long blue hair noticed her. She was wearing a school uniform highly reminiscent to the ones on Lucky Star, and knowing full well that this is a cosplay cafe, she is definitely cosplaying as a certain someone we all know.

"BITCHIN'! You're here!" She shouted with a cat smile and gave them a thumbs up sign.

"So in-character, Sakura." Shion snickered as she walked to a table nearby.

"Thanks..." Sakura broke out of character. "Keeping that cat smile and the lazy eyes up is harder than it seems... So, you taking the usual table?"

"Of course!" Shion waved at Alice and Benkei, telling them to quickly get there. As soon as Alice got close enough, Shion put her arm over Alice's shoulders and told Sakura, "This here's Arisu, my new buddy! And your new regular!"

"Oh!" Sakura tensed up. "Welcome to Starry Dreams Cafe, where we offer the best food and good service. But not services that pass a certain line." She turned to Benkei and narrowed her eyes at him. Then she faced Alice again. "We're only open on weekends but it's totally worth dropping every once in a while."

"Out of character~" Shion hummed as she sat down in a cubicle, perched her elbow on the table and rested her chin in her palm.

"Gah!" Sakura twitched. She put the cat smile back on her face and said, "Have you guys played the new eroge, (censored due to age ratings)? It's just as awesome as (censored due to age ratings)!"

Benkei threw himself onto the seat in the cubicle. "I don't play eroges!"

"That's surprising..." Alice mumbled as she sat next to Shion.

"So!" Sakura slammed her hand on the desk. "What'll it be? The usual Sunday Sundae?"

"Ooh yeah! Make it three!" Shion put three fingers up. She nudged at Alice. "No worries, I'm paying."

"Okay..." Alice put her head down.

vvvvvvvvvvv

"Iiiiit's here!" Sakura put a tray with three glass bowls of ice cream in it on the table. "As a token, would you like me to sing Cha-La-Head-Cha-La?"

"In character?" Shion put one of the glass bowls in front of her.

"Yep." Sakura smiled devilishly.

"No thank you." Shion shook her head, picking up the spoon and scooping up the ice cream.

Alice stared at the glass bowl of ice cream in front of her. The ice cream was probably twice the size of the bowl. They were rolled into balls and there were multiple colours. She could only recognize about two flavours that are chocolate and vanilla. The rest were unknown to her. To top of the mountain of ice cream, there was chocolate melting down into bowl with cherries on top.

Shion and Benkei were glaring at Alice in anticipation. She picked up the spoon, took a scoop of it and raised the spoon up right in front of her face. She was staring at the ice cream.

The other two were still glaring at her.

And she still stared the ice cream down.

"Hurry up and eat it!" Shion lost her patience.

Alice gulped and put the spoon in her mouth, biting it shut. She held that pose for a few moments before sliding the spoon out.

"So...?" Shion's eyes lit up.

"It's good." Alice, completely deadpan.

"I win!" Shion pointed at Benkei. "Now give me five!"

Benkei raised his hand up, preparing for a high-5.

"Bucks. Five bucks." Shion continued. "We agreed on this."

Benkei threw a coin on the table. Grinning deviously, he said, "You said five bucks. Here in Japan, this 5 yen is 5 bucks."

"You scumbag..." Shion growled, snatching the coin away.

"Um..." Alice raised her hand slowly.

"Sorry!" Shion turned to her. "We made a bet. Benkei betted that you'd say it's fattening and I betted that you would say it's good."

"Oh..." Alice took another scoop of the ice cream. She waved at Sakura, who promptly approached them.

"Yes?" Sakura leaned towards her.

"Could you give my compliments to the chef?" Alice asked.

"Sure?" Sakura seemed rather confused. She did so anyway. She entered a door that probably led to the kitchen.

"Compliments, huh?" Benkei perched his arm on his chair.

"Is that a habit, Alice?" Shion questioned, smiling.

"My parents thought me to always give my compliments to those who cook my food if I like it..." Alice pouted.

"Aww." Shion rubbed Alice's head. "Isn't that cute? Don't do too much though. Especially in fast food restaurants."

"Fast food restaurants...?" Alice muttered silently.

Sakura came back and slammed her hands on the table, just to grasp their attention. "The chef says whatever."

"Whatever?" Shion repeated. "What kind of chef says that upon getting a compliment?"

"Ours." Sakura sighed and proceeded with her job.

"Gee, the chef must be a huge jerk." Shion scowled.

"Naw, he's just busy." Benkei flailed his hand at Shion. "Working at a kitchen is hard. Ever watch Hell's Kitchen?"

Shion raised an eyebrow. "Hell's Wha...?"

"Never mind." Benkei smiled. "It's really hard, that's for sure."

vvvvvvvvvvvv

The day was still bright. The three of them were already done eating and were heading back to Gekkoukan.

"So?" Shion put her arm over Alice's shoulders. "You want to go there every Sunday?"

"Sure." Alice nodded.

"Alright!" Shion gave her a thumbs up sign.

They kept walking forward, following Shion's lead. They were going back to the train station, the same way they got to the cafe, except in an opposite direction.

Benkei noticed a large billboard showing a new phone in the industry. "Oh, the new MePhone ISS."

"You want to buy one?" Shion turned around and asked.

"Nah." Benkei scowled. "I won't buy anything my brother makes."

"Brother?" Alice turned around to him.

"Yeah." Benkei sighed. "Touma Saotome, that's my brother. I'm sure you've heard his name before."

Alice shook her head.

"Well, that's okay." Benkei smiled. "He changed his last name from Satomi to Saotome and then made a business for himself. And now he's the world's youngest trillionare." He glanced at the billboard once again. "I haven't seen him since I was 5. Bastard's probably somewhere in America, laying 9 chicks each day."

"Perversion runs in the Satomi family blood, huh?" Shion snarked.

"He's living the dream!" Benkei shouted. "I'll give it a few more years. Then I'LL start laying twice as many women!"

"Good luck." Alice said to him.

"You do know the- Never mind." Shion seemed fazed at Alice's response.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvv

Starry Dreams Cafe: Night time

"Gaaaaah!" Sakura threw her wig off, revealing her shoulder length brown hair. "Holding that smile the whole day was painful!" She looked at a black haired guy with a black spray jacket heading towards the exit. "Leaving already?"

He turned around, facing her. "Yeah..."

"You never look happy. A cute girl complimented you today." She winked.

"She complimented my food, not me." He scowled.

"You'll never get a girlfriend at the rate you smile, which is never." She said to him.

"Don't want one." He replied.

Sakura grumbled. "Don't say that. I know you really want one deep down inside, Reiji."

vvvvvvvvvvvvvvv

Suzaku and Aoki's Animanga Rant

Suzaku: Would you look at that cliffhanger!

Aoki: I know!

Suzaku: I hope our author wouldn't put one each chapter. Like in Code Geass R2.

Aoki: Oh yeah... Say, what do you think about the end of that show?

Suzaku: Hahaha. I'm just glad the guy who shared my name didn't die. And Orange-Kun got a happy ending. He's probably a lolicon though.

Aoki: What about Lelouch's sacrifice...?

Suzaku: Hm? What about it?

Aoki: Suzaku penetrated Lelouch~!

Suzaku: You fujoshi...

Aoki: Oh, all the yaoi hentai I've read of those two~! Ah~