Chapter 27

Right after we came in from outside, it was ten a.m., time for ME Time (time to do what we please in our rooms.) Also during this time, the psychologist on duty, Dr. Curtis, would make his daily rounds and talk to each of us. While I was waiting, I lay down on my bed and began to think of what I would say to him, since this was our first meeting.

I couldn't tell him about my father, no absolutely not. But he will most definitely ask about my pregnancy. And he'll most likely say something about investigating rape. What was I going to say? Besides I'd already told Nicole I had been raped and he'd likely have been informed. How could I possibly create such a believable lie?

After racking my brain with dozens of possible rapists, Dr. Curtis finally came to my room. "Good Morning, Laurajo. My name is Dr. Curtis. It's a pleasure to meet you." He extended a hand out to me to shake. I sat up and returned the gesture anxiously, awaiting the dreaded question. He picked up a notepad and a pen and sat down on my desk in the corner. "So, lets start by me asking what brought you here."

"Uhm well I had a nightmare and woke up overwhelmed. It bothered me so much that I didn't think straight and sliced my arm with a steak knife." I felt an awkward smile slip across my face.

Dr. Curtis nodded his head and wrote some notes on the notepad. "Ok, so do you always use cutting to cope?" He looked up at me from his notes, with a seemingly cheery smile plastered to his face, awaiting my reply.

"Uh, no that was the first time actually." More note writing. I began to feel a little bit nervous and anxious about this; I felt like he was prolonging the session to save the biggest question for last.

"Have you ever used dangerous methods to cope, say smoking, drinking, or drugs?"

"No never." A look of confusion came over the doctor's face. The look said why is she here? She doesn't belong here.

"Ok then, so my files say that you're pregnant. Is that correct?"

My face started to feel flushed and my stomach did a flip as he said that. "Uhm, yes sir; I am."

He looked at me, with a look that I assumed was trying to not be one of disgust. "Your file also says you admitted to being raped. Care to elaborate?"

"Sure, uhm" I scrambled my brain for an answer, glancing around the drab room hoping for some light. "Uh, it was one of those idiots in the alley. You see I was walking home from a friend's house when a man pulled me from behind and attacked me." I forced a tear to roll down my cheek for dramatic effects.

"So did you ever see your attacker?"

"No I didn't, it was too dark out." More note writing. Dr. Curtis' face twisted a little, making me fear that he wasn't buying my story.

"Well, did you tell your parents, contact police?" He looked at me with dismay, I on the other hand was struggling not o look flustered.

"Uhm, I told my parents that I had slept with my neighbor across the street, his name is Griffin and he's my age. I've always had mixed feelings about him, because he'd come to my house to say hi and then he'd run away. It was quite weird actually. And because I lied, the police were never contacted. But it doesn't matter, I'm a Catholic and I have forgiven him. He has given me the gift of life. And, I already love this baby."

Dr. Curtis wrote some more notes on the notepad. Then he looked up at me with a look that said we're changing the subject now.

"So, you said you had a nightmare. Could you describe it for me?"

"Uh, well. It took place in the future. I was picking up my daughter from school and we were crossing the street to get to the parking lot. The guy that raped me ran over my daughter with his Hummer. It scared me because, as I said before, I have come to love my baby a lot. I know it hasn't been long enough, but I really love her. I think it's a girl."

Dr. Curtis smiled a little. "I'm glad you feel that way. But you have to know that bringing up a child is a lot of responsibility, especially if you're still a child yourself. I'm really sorry this event happened to you at such a young age. And I'm glad you've been thinking positively. But, about your dream, it appears that you are suffering some symptoms of PTSD. You know what that is right?" Of course I knew what Post Traumatic Stress Disorder was. But I never would have assumed I had it.

"So, what you're saying is that I'm a little freaked out from recent events?"

He looked up at me from his notes, as if I had interrupted him. "Yes, you could say that. So what I want you to do is to keep thinking happy thoughts. I'm going to put you on an anxiety/anti-depressant to help with the upsetting thoughts. We'll start you tomorrow morning on twenty milligrams of Fluoxetine, also known as Prozac. I will contact your parents and get their consent before its official and I'll come tell you when I find out. And don't worry, Fluoxetine is safe during pregnancy, so we're all good there. Also, you should tell your parents the truth about what happened and how you were raped. Its for you safety, trust me, I wouldn't be telling you if I didn't care." He then glanced at his watch. "Oh my is it that time already. Well I should let you go now. I have to get to the next patient so, see you later Laurajo." He stood up straighter and shook my hand again.

"Uhm, you can just call my Laura." I murmured. He shook his head in approval and walked out of my room.

After that, I lay back down on my bed and relaxed… until Heidi and Antonio, the other staff on duty, rounded everyone up for skills group. This should be loads of fun.