6/12/12 - My first attempt at anything poetic. Ever. Forgive me if it sucks, but I'm actually quite proud of it. Anyways, now that it's been nearly four months since the incident I talk about, I'll have you know my feelings are quite different now. AKA, I've resolved the issue, if that makes sense. Talked with my friend... that sort of thing. Hope you enjoy!

Easier to Pretend

I'm tired of pretending,
Being somebody I'm not.

It's exhausting, really.

Sometimes,
I wish you would just realize.

Realize that I can't be myself around you.

Not anymore.

Realize how it makes me feel;
Like an outsider,
Looking in from beyond.

Sometimes,
I'd like to think things are different.

But things change,
People change.

People I care about,
People I trust,
People I love.

And I've come to grasp,
You're not the person I thought you were.

Not really.

We laugh together,
We tell jokes.

And I pretend,
That everything is all right,
That I am perfectly fine.

Inside, however...
I'm dying.

But the truth hurts,
A lot,
No matter how nicely you try and put things.

It's easier,
So much easier.

To put on a facade,
To plaster a smile,
A false sense of happiness,
Over my face.

Easier to pretend,
Than to admit the harsh reality of truth.