Nora:

3, 2, 1- I turn off my alarm before it rings. I've never actually needed an alarm. I don't recall ever sleeping pass eight a day in my life. And even though I wake up early everyday, I've never really had anything to do or any place to go before noon. Maybe now that I'll actually have to wake up at seven will make me want to sleep in more often. I'd particularly like to sleep in today.

This house is a mess- my house is a mess. Its the type of mess where you can stand in any room in this place for hours and not see anything that needs to be cleaned and yet you still feel like everything is dirty. I suppose its cluttered- it is cluttered. Yet, I recognize that my old house, my Non's house was probably worse. Nonna had twice the amount of stuff and yet in her house everything seemed to have a place because everything in the house was placed. Mom doesn't place her stuff- she just puts it places . There is a subtle yet important difference between placing something somewhere and putting in somewhere.

Non doesn't live with me anymore. She lives in Eden, now. And Eden by the way, is not religious jargon for heaven or something like that. Eden is a retirement home in the downtown meat-packing district. Its a huge brick building which looks essentially like every other dull brick building around it, except it has a few six foot tall posters in the windows of elderly people smiling in a garden setting even though there are not any gardens in the meat packing district. Before she went there, I had always envisioned retirement homes as these big white houses with wrap-around porches and old women in sun dresses playing checkers outside and drinking lemonade. I suppose that that image was conjured up by things I'd seen in movies or maybe from most of the houses I had seen in Conway- New Conway that is, in New Hampshire, thats where I'm from. Except unlike everyone else in Conway I never lived in one of those picturesque houses . Now I'm living in an apartment, like everyone else in New York. I finally fit in, I guess and yet I kinda hate it here.

Everything I know about school I've only seen in tv and movies. I was home schooled- Non's version of homeschooling, I suppose. She only really taught me music, writing, french and basic math. I'm enrolling as a junior and am supposed to take remedial math and science in school even though these are apparently classes for freshmen and 'slow kids' according to my mother. I think that if I had grown up any place except where I did, social services would have been knocking at my door asking why I wasn't going to the high school only a mile away. There wasn't a reason except that Non thought she could do a better job of educating me, herself, considering that in her opinion the education system had failed my mom who had me just in time for her senior prom. Although, to be fair I can't say that the education system failed my mom even though sex ed certainly did. She moved to New York to pursue a singing career when I was a toddler. It wasn't that she abandoned me or anything as dramatic as that, she visited a lot and never forgot my birthday and now I've been staying on her couch for the last few weeks while Non is slowly losing it in Eden.

"Nora Petite."

I realized that I was smiling like an idiot when the teacher introduced me. I'd imagined the way that people would look in school millions of times in my head. I had always imagined that everyone would be interested in me, that they would all smile and wonder where I came from. I imagined that the teacher would sit me next to someone who would introduce themselves to me as soon as I sat down and that that person would end up being my best friend or my first major boyfriend. I imagined it so many times in my head but in reality everyone looks so much more... bored. Half of the class doesn't even look up when the teacher reads my name- they just lay with their heads on their desks or their eyes glazed over like they all have some sort of disease. I wondered for weeks what kind of impression I would make on these people and not one of them even really noticed me. It was hysterical and depressing at the same time.

During my second period a guy with freckles told me he liked my shirt and asked where I had gotten it. It was only after I had responded that had been my grandma's in the 50s that I realized that he was being sarcastic. He then started laughing and repeating that I looked like "fucking Betty White!" His name was Alfie and he was in my year therefore making him the oldest guy in my otherwise all freshman math class. But, that wasn't particularly surprising.

When I asked a girl in my english class where the changing room for gym was, she laughed and said that she hadn't been to gym since she was a freshman. I was pretty sure that she still could have probably told me where the room was but thought it would be funny to say that in front of her friends. Not that it was a tragedy, missing gym.

I had lunch second to last period and decided that going to the cafeteria would probably not be a smart move considering that I had managed not to make a single 'friend' since my first period. It wasn't shocking that I wasn't miss popularity or anything really. I've always kinda been an awful combination of shy and boring and not to mention that I wasn't all that used to hanging out with all people my age. Even so, I was desperately afraid of being one of those cliche girls who sits alone in the lunchroom or in the library like I had seen in just about every teenage movie. So, I decided to go outside and maybe read or stare off into space for a while. There were a couple of empty lunch tables which I assumed no one was using because it was about mid-december although it wasn't so cold out. But, only few seconds after I had sat down, I suddenly heard a voice say,

"Yo, what's up?"

I turned to see a group of people- two guys, two girls- all staring at me. The one who spoke was a tall tan guy in a long sleeved shirt which emphasized the v-shape of his chest. He was sort of - strikingly good-looking.

"Uh- hi there.."

I mumbled surprised at how 'scared' my voice sounded.

"Yo, your like new right or something?"

"Um, yeah, New Hampshire, I'm- I mean I'm from New Hampshire."

I said and almost immediately after one of the girls in the group laughed and said that no one asked which was true, nobody did ask.

The guy laughed,

"Oh, nice. David. This is Amy, James and Olya."

He said, introducing me to a series of rather unfriendly people who each waved slightly. Amy is was a small, thin girl with highlighted hair, beside her James is a muscular-looking asian boy and at the end the girl- Olya had dark hair with a green streak in the front and enough piercings on her face that it would seem to be difficult for her to go through airport security.

"We usually chill here, sometimes."

David continued, looking me up and down.

"You got a light, New Hampshire?"

Olya asked, picking at the inside of her ear.

"Oh, Nora."

I corrected her as I dung through my bag and give her a packet of matches.

"Haha, matches? Fancy shit."

She laughed, lighting her cigarette.

"Merci."

She said handing me back the matches.

"De rien."

"What?"

"De rien- um its french for your welcome."

I said, making the girls laugh.

"How do you know that? You speak french?"

Amy chimed in,, mockingly- this was the first thing she's said yet.

"Obviously, shes fucking classy and speaks french, dumbass."

The other girl then quickly replied. I got the feeling that they weren't very friendly.

"You want to bum a loosey?"

James asked, looking fairly disinterested. I, honestly, had no idea what a 'loosey' was but the

fact that he was holding out a cigarette made me assume he was asking if I wanted to smoke.

"Yeah, sure. Thanks."

I said. I had actually smoked quite a lot growing up with my Non. She and all her card friends

smoked and sometimes I would sneak out with a couple of their cigarettes in the backyard on card nights when I was really bored.

"Yo, so must like not know anyone yet, huh? you busy friday? You should chill."

David smiled. I can't say it was a really friendly smile, more the kind that make you feel uncomfortable. But still it was good enough, I couldn't believe he was inviting me out with him and his 'group' or whoever these people were. I mean he didn't even know me. I thought that he must be the nicest guy in this entire place.

"Uh- no, I'm not busy at all. Are you serious?"

"Don't have a heart-attack."

Amy rolled her eyes. I can't really say I liked her at all.

"Yeah, sure. Give me your number. I'll text you."

He continued. I honestly, could barely talk, I was so excited.

"Oh, I don't really have a cell phone. If you give me yours I could call you."

I said, nervously. I wasn't sure if I should have offered to call? I didn't know if that was weird or not. I'm assuming it was because it got me another eye roll from that Amy girl.

"Yo, I bet you have one of those old-school classy phones where you turn the dial thing or whatever, don't you?"

Olya asked.

"Um, no."

I said flatly while David uncapped a sharpie marker and wrote his name and number on my wrist. His handwriting was terrible but as soon as he finished my palm began sweating like crazy.

"Yo, call me sometime. Um- Nora, right?"

I realized that I had the same huge idiotic smile the entire way to Eden which I suppose isn't normal while riding the subway. But, I honestly don't think I could have helped it even if I tried. When I got to Nonna room, she asked me what I was so excited about in a way that was both happy and judging at the same time. She was always afraid of me being with boys after mom got pregnant almost she's really never had anything to worry about.

"I don't know- I mean I think it was a pretty good day, Non. I think I may have made friends. I don't really know yet. I could me making a big deal out of-"

"Shh, I don't understand what your talking about Isabella."

"No, Nora, Non."

I sighed.

"Its Nora."

I said fixing the flowers beside her bed.