3.7.12

i am so sick

of not existing.

i am so tired

of no one knowing

who i am.

of no one hearing me

when i scream.

of no one listening to me

when i cry.

why do i not matter?

am i not as important

to the world

as everyone else?

i am exhausted

of pretending i am strong.

of pretending i am ok.

of pretending life

matters to me.

i am so scared

of life.

death.

myself.

the power i need to have

but cannot.

i am powerless.

i don't want

to not trust anyone.

i am so alone

in this hell.

does no one truly see

my pain?

do my scars not matter

to anyone?

you see me every day,

and yet,

you never seem to notice

me.

am i really even here?

do i exist?

maybe

i'm just a dream.

maybe

my life is not real.

maybe, somewhere,

my existence matters.

it sure as hell doesn't here.

i want

to be happy again.

to be loved.

to be listened to.

why are my words

so empty?

does anyone speak my language?

is anyone there?

help me.

i need a hug.