I've always tried to find ways to never like him the way I do now. I made a failing attempt to dislike him and not befriend him. I noticed him only when he was in front of me. I realized back then I was being mean to him by ignoring him. Yet I didnt want to fall for a guy who would never like me back. I suppose I never was his type. Stupid me I never knew his type. I whispered to myself that I was only doing this to protect myself. I never had any internal bleeding in my heart and I didnt want to start it then. Hear me out! The outrageously funny, smiling, paranoid girl who was always be single until later.

I first noticed him in my third period math class. My friend, Jailene and me were making random stories and conversating about our crushes. Our crushes were both sophmores while we were freshies. We knew we didnt stand a chance because we were of a lower class and they were out of our league. And besides that we wouldnt look good with them. Therefore, we would just day dream about our crushes ignoring school work and began our random babbling. Not caring of what our math teacher said.

I remebered one day, I began to take notice in this guy who had brunette hair to his ears in the stlye that intrigued me so. Jailene notice him too when he moved closer to the back of the classroom which was closer to us. Jailene would say, "What the fuck is wrong with that boy?"

I eyed him from a diagonal point of view as he sat in the desk in front of her. He was the only quite one in the back. He simpily didnt belong in the atmosphere. I smile, "He looks alright and maybe even cute."

"Really?" She kicked his book cage under his chair. "I think he is just a creepy ass, ugly bastard!"She says loud enough for he could hear yet his earphones probably cut all her noise.

I nudge her with my shoulder while she giggled at her actions. I peered at his back to see if he would turn to see what happened. Yet he didnt.

"Jailene! He probably just wanted to talk to Alex."

"No, if he wanted to talk to Alex, he would have been at the desk beside Alex. I think he just likes me and wants contact with me or something."

I huffed and shook off a possibilty that maybe he wanted to talk to me. I blushed at the very thought of me running through his mind. Besides, I couldnt possibly be running through a cute guy's head because of the fact that I was so damn repulsive. Therefore, I rid of any idea of me becoming anything closer.

That year pass without Jailene and I ever speaking a word to that boy. Yet we spoke behind his back. I, speaking of the postive and her talking the negative. She continued the knocking on his desk when he moved to the seat in front of her. I acknowledge his existence yet I never fully took any approach to him. I was shy and satsified with my crush with the hot attractive sophomore.