Avery

"Just trust me, Bella. Give me a chance, you know I'm not a bad guy and I haven't been able to stop thinking about you…just give me one more chance?"

Seeing as this was the fourth time we had had this conversation in a month's time, since this happened to mark the fourth occasion that he couldn't decide whether or not he wanted to date me, there was no way in hell that was going to happen. In fact, the question was enough to make me start laughing hysterically.

For someone who supposedly intimidates guys with my intelligence, I definitely have taken my time in learning my lesson about not dating from a dating site, because Avery marks the last casualty of this practice. I had begun my conversations with him about four months before we actually went on a date, but our talks were limited to texting and were brief and surface level in nature, not occurring on a daily or even weekly basis. In fact, I felt like I knew so little about him that I turned him down the first time he asked to meet, explaining I wanted to get to know him better first. By the time I actually went on a date with him, I still didn't feel like I knew a significant amount about him.

Our initial meeting, at least in my opinion, went well. Avery's idea of a date for us was to go hiking in a remote part of the mountains. Me being the avid horror movie fan that I am, I nixed that suggestion, visions of my mutilated body parts playing through my mind as I suggested a more public location at a local area designated for running and walking. We hung around each other for hours, talking easily, and I found him to be fairly attractive. We greeted and parted with a hug and made plans for another meeting, one which would be more of an actual date.

When Avery cancelled the date, saying that a family emergency had come up, I understood and wished him well. What I didn't understand was when I later saw on Facebook that he had gone on the "family emergency" with another girl, and that he had just set his relationship status to being in a relationship with her.

"I didn't think you would care," was his rather uninspired response when I asked him why he hadn't told me he was no longer single, and whether he had intended to tell me at all, since he had continued to speak to me on a daily basis. "Timing's everything, and she lives closer, so…"

I could have lived with that. Granted, I wasn't very pleased that it seemed to me he had intended to deceive me and string me along as a potential future date if his current rather quick relationship fell through, but I could understand that he had only met me once and didn't owe me anything. This didn't mean, however, that I wasn't annoyed with his handling of it. But when I realized that he had met this girl at the same time that he met me, and from the same source, and then saw his statuses begin to flood my newsfeed on Facebook, detailing their happiness and what an "old married couple" they were, I wasn't overly thrilled. So I removed him as a friend; after all, his end note to our last text had wished me luck in life and relationships, seeming pretty final to me that he had no intention of seeing me again.

Two days later, even while remaining in the midst of his newfound "bliss," text from Avery appeared, the basis spelling out: "I'm very disappointed that you would remove me as your friend."

Bit rich coming from the guy who had been content to let me think we were heading towards dating without cluing me in to the fact that he wasn't single. I said as much, and that was the end of it. Until two days later.

"I broke up with Jennifer, Bella…it was stupid to jump in so fast with her, it was too much too soon and I regret not giving you a chance. We had a lot in common and I'd like to try dating you again…will you give me another chance?"

After giving it some thought, and setting forth the qualifier that I wanted our dating to go slow, with him earning trust from me, rather than "jumping in fast" like he had with Jennifer, I said yes. After all, Avery was attractive and educated, and we did seem to have some things in common. Guys were stupid, and he was humbling himself. Why not give him another chance?

A few months passed and all seemed to be going well, though we were both so busy it was difficult to get dates in. Still, they were going well; he paid my way each time, he told me about himself and his family, and on the last date, we spent a good bit of time cuddling and kissing, enjoying hanging around each other.

Then, 3 days before my birthday, and not very long before Valentine's Day, rather suspiciously, came the text…text, not phone call, sent out while both of us were at work and therefore could not respond via phone, where raised voices might have to be dealt with.

"I've given it some thought and I decided you live too far away and you move too slowly for my tastes. I feel like you don't want a relationship and I do and we're not looking for the same things. With Jennifer she was spending the night right away, every night, and she lived right there, and with you it's the opposite. There's gotta be a middle ground. I don't feel a 100% with this so there's no point being in a relationship. So I wish you luck but I don't think we should meet up again."

Mind. Blown. There had never been any mention at all of sex between us; hell, he hadn't even tried to kiss me until date 3. And now he was not only abruptly "breaking up" with me, if the term could even apply to the circumstances, he was doing so because, apparently, I didn't have sex with him as often- meaning, not once- as his ex, who he had dated for a total of a week and a half, had? Not to mention in the same breath he both wanted and didn't want a relationship with me?

My response to him was not pretty. When I called him on comparing me to his ex and wanting the "relationship" to be more focused on sex, when we still barely knew each other, he got offended, denied it, and our conversation was over pretty fast. Until a few days later.

"I'm so offended you would think that I just want a relationship to be about sex! I think you should apologize."

Another not-pretty conversation. Ended with my refusal to apologize for pointing out what I saw as the truth, and I figured that was the end of it.

Few days later. "I've been thinking and I have decided that I really do think we have a lot in common and you drive me crazy, because you're so different and not like other girls and I never know what you're thinking…and I still want to date. Will you give me another chance? Just trust me, give me another chance."

Long conversation yet again, another denial from me. One which ended in him deleting me from his Facebook friend list five minutes after it concluded and swearing that he would "leave me alone and not ever bother me again." I thought surely this was the end.

Two days later. "I know I said I'd never talk to you again, but I thought maybe you changed your mind…do you want to date me? Give me a chance."

By this point, all I could do was laugh. Whatever his education may be, I know a guy who still needs pointers on the definition of the words "forever" and "never."