|The Hardest Part Of This Is Leaving You
Author: RoxanneAndersonHummel PM
Avery always believed she could deal with the cancer and brush it off. She didn't fear death. She knew what was coming but she didn't know how hard saying goodbye would be. Based off the song 'Cancer' by My Chemical Romance.Rated: Fiction T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Words: 1,154 - Published: 06-19-12 - Status: Complete - id: 3033966
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
I had been here too many times. Each one the same. The only difference was the time got shorter.
I had 3 weeks left. I was in my freshman year of high school when I was
diagnosed with lung cancer. When my school's principal had found out about my condition, he quickly bumped my prom to the next available Friday. During my long stays at the hospital for chemo, I met a 6 year old girl named Payton.
Payton suffered from a brain tumor so we spent time in the cancer ward together.
"Hey Avery?" her small voice asked me. I looked up from my drawing to
look at her. "Will you come celebrate my 7th birthday with me?" I smiled
sweetly. "When is it?" "In 3 weeks, I think." Oh no. I would be...gone...by then. "Well Payton I don't know if I'll be here." She looked up at me confused. "Why? Are you going home?" How can I put this? "Yes. Something like that, Payton. I'm going home." I sighed. "Well try to visit, kay?" she said happily. I only nodded. "What do you want for your birthday?" I asked her. "A new brain!" She said sounding hopeful. She kept on
drawing and I stood up. "I gotta go, Pay. See ya later!" I kissed the top of
her bald head before leaving the room. I shut the playroom door and started
crying. My friend, Isabella, who had skin cancer, walked by me. "What's wrong?" her voice flooded with concern. I looked up at her with tears in my eyes. "How do
you tell a 6 year old you can't go to her birthday because you will be dead?"
END OF FLASHBACK
I remember prom...I got a new wig and had it perfectly straight. I bought a
beautiful blue and silver gown and black heels. I did my makeup and tried to
cover up the black rings under my eyes.
"Hey Avery you look amazing!" My boyfriend, Darren said as he kissed me. I
smiled and thanked him. The night passed quickly. Finally it was time for a slow
dance! Darren took my waist and I put my arms around his neck. We danced and I
could feel his heart beating in time with mine. After the song ended, Darren
kissed me passionately. During the kiss, I began to lose my breath. I broke
away. "Darren, D-Darren I can't breathe." I gasped. "Avery? Ave? Baby what's
wrong?" he said as he helped me to the floor. Everyone was staring at me.
"SOMEONE CALL 911!" Darren screamed as he held me to his chest, stroking my
hair. I looked up at his panicked face for what I was afraid would be the last
time. My eyes met his one more time before they closed.
END OF FLASHBACK
I remember waking up in the hospital believing I was dead. That was it. My prom gown was replaced with a hospital gown and my wig was gone and I was once again just another patient, awaiting death in the cancer ward.
God these lights are bright...oh no...did I die at prom? If so...it wouldn't be
that bad...I died in Darren's arms. "Am I dead" I asked weakly. "OH THANK GOD"
my Mother yelled as she threw her arms around me. My Doctor came in and he
looked at me sadly. "Ms. Avery...I'm sorry but...I would say your goodbyes...these may be your final few minutes". My Mother began to cry. "Mommy...I love you...I'm so sorry for any problems I've caused you. I couldn't have asked for a better Mommy." She hugged me tightly and kissed my forehead "I couldn't have asked for a better daughter." She said through tears. "I'll say hi to Daddy for you." She nodded.
Then, I saw Darren walk through the door. "Darren!" I tried to scream for him
but only a whisper came out. He stood by me and placed a hand on my face. I looked up at him, crying. "Darren please never forget about me. I love you so much. Please." I begged. "I won't, Avery. I promise. I love you more than life itself. I don't want anyone but you. I will always be true to you." He cried. We stood there crying together as Darren pulled a ring out of his jacket pocket. "Avery...please...marry me. Even if we cannot be together, I will know you are always mine." he was sobbing. I nodded furiously and he placed the gold ring on my pale bony finger.
He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine. This was the last time I would feel his lips. His breath on my face. I never love again. We kissed for what seemed like hours. I wanted it to be. "I love you so much, Avery" he said, his lips only inches from mine. "I love you too, Darren." we cried, holding each other, savoring the feeling. When he let me go, he kept hold of my hand. My mother stood on my left and took my hand. "Avery?" a small voice called from the doorway.
She approached the bed. "Are you going away?" the younger girl asked. I nodded. "Yea...I am" I choked out as I held back tears. Suddenly, Payton crawled next to me, avoiding all my wires. She placed her head on my chest and held onto me. She was
crying. I freed my hand from Darren's to hold her.
After a few minutes, she hopped down. I took Darren's hand back and waited. I prayed. I cried. I laid there. It was coming. I felt it. It was here. I suddenly couldn't breathe. "I-I-I l-love y-you a-all" I was able to mutter out. I felt my Mother shaking
as she cried. Darren was screaming at me to stay and Payton cried. I took my
final breath and closed my eyes. I was gone.
END OF FLASHBACK
That was 3 years ago. I died in the arms of my loving mother and my incredible
husband. Only 3 days after was I joined by Payton when the tumor in her brain
took over. In the end I did get to see her for her birthday. I watch over my
mother everyday alongside Payton and my father. Darren is doing fine as well.
Like he said before I died, he stayed true and he has not dated anyone else. I
am happy here. There is no suffering in Heaven. I know someday I will see
everyone again but until then all I can do is my best to protect them. That is
what I intend to do.