|Hiding from Mirrors
Author: Dale Z. LArmint PM
Rima, a 19 year old girl, tries to understand her mother and realizing that her ties to her whole family are not so close. It's not until she decides to snoop around that she realizes that maybe it was best to never know at all.Just a heads up, this will start off pretty slow. It shouldn't be that long of a story.Rated: Fiction T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,213 - Updated: 07-14-12 - Published: 06-30-12 - id: 3037374
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Entry 1- Today I came out of the closet to Wanda, and she didn't find it at all surprising. Apparently, she saw it coming so that was good I guess. I didn't tell her about my feelings for her though, I don't think I can.
Wait my mother is gay? Huh….is that what's the problem with her?
I looked past a few entries of just her life and stopped at another.
Entry 12- I told Wanda how I felt about her, and she doesn't feel the same way. I know rejection hurts but why does it feel like my world is crashing down? What 's worse is that now she won't even look at me. She feels guilty but I still want to be friends with her. I don't understand this…
Entry 13- She still doesn't want to talk to me. Not even look at me. According to her, she doesn't deserve to look at me after hurting me. I want my best friend back. I guess high school really is tough.
Ha, high school is a big joke to me. Nothing really happened in my years there, kind of odd to know that my mother had some drama in her life. But I guess things got better, I wonder if these journal entries go all the way up to when she had me?
Entry 20- It's been a few months, but Wanda has finally looked at me again. To add more good news she's fallen for me. I don't think I've ever felt such happiness before.
Entry 49- Wanda's in college now, and I still have a year to go. It sucks not being able to see her as much as I like to. It's valentine's day also, she wrote me a poem.
Entry 60- Wanda broke up with me today. I don't feel anything anymore…happiness I mean. I can't take it anymore, but I still love her. I don't understand myself, I really just can't live without her. I can't end my own life because she still does care about me. I guess I have to wait for her to change her mind. If I show her that I still care for her, that I still am there for her, I might be able to get another chance with her.
Ok….now I'm really confused. What is going on with my mother?
I skimmed through some entries when I saw my dad's name.
Entry 190- Wanda has a boyfriend now, his name is Joey. Talk about a slap to the face.
Alright, so I'm guessing my mother stole Wanda's boyfriend now? What is going on here?
Entry 230- That stupid bastard tried to pin down Wanda and the chased her down a street. How the heck do I even- and NOW apparently she's going to get back with him because he's proven himself worthy, he's shown that she can depend on him. I don't understand, what did I do wrong? Wanda, can't you see that I love you? I told her my feelings and she told me she still needs me and Joey to be happy. Why does she need him? Why? I don't get it.
Entry 500- Wanda and Joey got married today. Before the actual ceremony, Wanda went up to me and asked me if I had any feelings for her still. I told her I did, I broke down, I missed being able to cry on her shoulder and listen to the sound of her heart. I told her how much I missed her lips, her smile and laugh. She gave me a hug and then kissed me. It was a beautiful moment, but it tasted bittersweet. It was the kiss that destroyed the side of her that still loved me in the way I wanted her to. She said her vows and now she is Joey's husband. I guess Wanda and I will never talk about the past love of ours.
I guess this is goodbye to that side of me that is in love with her.
It hurts so much.
I saw that I was nearing the end of the journal…to my surprise. I don't get it. Does this mean…
I shook my head and read the last entry.
Entry 1021- Today Wanda gave birth to a beautiful girl. She looks just like her. Almost like a reflection of her. Wanda is a spitting image of her. I held her in my arms and smiled, she was so frail.
Sadly that moment had to end..Wanda was losing a lot of blood. Before she left, she made me promise to take care of her daughter, to be her mother even if it meant to be with Joey. I don't like Joey, but if it's for Wanda, then I don't mind. I guess I still did love her after all this time. I held her hand crying the whole time. Joey stood in the corner of the room, his face hard like stone. I told her I loved her and she smiled saying, "I know."
I promised her that I would take care of her, and Joey made me promise not tell her who I really was.
Her daughter's name is Rima. Like mira…or mirror. Funny isn't it?
I dropped the stack of papers on the floor and I heard a creak behind me.
Whipping my head around I saw my mother….or whoever this person was.
"So…you know now don't you?" My mother stared at me, her eyes were dead as if she had been sad for a long, long time.
"I…what the heck is this? Who's Wanda? Who are you?" I stepped back, scared as heck.
My Mother sighed a long sad sigh, "Wanda is your birth mother, your real mother. You look a lot like her you know…. And me? My name is Dylan. Well, I'm your mother's best friend…and ex lover. The jerk face downstairs is your real father Joey." She stared at me, that same cold stare of sadness. It was making me uneasy.
"But…why? Why did you do all this for me?" Tears began to swell in my eyes.
"For YOU?" My mother yelled tearfully and put her hands on my shoulders, " I never did it for you…I did it for her…."
I didn't know what to do, I only wished I never questioned why my mother acted so strange. It became clear to me now; she still loved my mother…my real one.
I put my arms around her, and Dylan put her head on my shoulder and began crying. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I just can't live like this anymore…"
"You don't have to Dylan….I'm sorry I snooped in the first place, but now I know. You still love my mom don't' you? It's ok…let's just be friends then why not?" I smiled at her.
Am I happy with what I found out?
I guess so.
But maybe I really didn't need to why Dylan acted the way she did. She was a great mom, if my real mom, Wanda, wanted her to raise me, then I guess it was the right choice.
For some reason though, I have a feeling that Wanda, er, my mom, can rest in peace now.
well that's the end of that! thanks for reading :D