I'm Fine

I don't need help.

"I'm Fine."

This is what I do to myself...since

"I'm Fine"

All the slashes are for not only one reason

But for several.

No one understands what I say.

Not even the white walls.

They don't answer my screams, or pleas.

No one understands me.

Not even myself.

2 slashes for the screams.

4 slashes for the depression.

6 slashes for the self blame.

8 slashes for the lies I tell.

10 slashes for the yelling.

12 slashes for the flashbacks.

14 slashes for the loneliness I feel.

16 slashes for the abuse.

18 slashes for the self-hate.

20 slashes for the bullying.

22 slashes for being awkward.

24 slashes for being ugly.

26 slashes for being fat.

28 slashes for not being enough.

30 slashes for being a burden.

32 slashes for everything I regret in life.

34 slashes for everyone I've ever disappointed.

36 slashes for the other ten slashes, just a little deeper now.

38 slashes for everything I've ever did wrong.

And 40 more slashes.

For every minute that

Went by and was too much

For me to handle.

The blood, the scars is just to prove how much I hurt.

I can't explain it in any form for you to understand.

No pity as I place long sleeves on the arms to hide them.

Few days pass for them to show the scabs, and then I let people stare at me.

Nothing.

No stares,

Only white walls to stare upon.

Why did you put me into this cell?

I don't need help.

"I'm Fine."

I didn't think I would have slashed that deep.

To the bone.

Blood flows down my arms and legs.

A year without slashing, and now this.

The razor is gone, I used scissors this time.

I sit here in a daze, trying to think.

Nothing.

Black spots start to get in my eyes.

I close my eyes.

I'm floating above my body.

Watching myself being cried over.

I shouldn't have gone that far.

I didn't need help.

I was

"Fine."

By Broken-Angst-Reader-Writer