Mon 20 Feb (1:28pm)
Hey, just so you know, I accidentally let in some neighborhood squirrels into your apartment (big mistake that was) and now I can't get them out. You may need to call animal control.

(1:30)
First question, who exactly are you? Second question, why did you let in some squirrels?

(1:35)
Whoops! Sorry about that. I just got a new phone and I'm trying to figure out how this works. Sorry about that.
(1:37)
To answer your other question, it was a prank that I was doing with my buddy. Let's just say it got out of hand.

(1:40)
Dude, you need help. One, squirrels carry diseases and two, you set them off in your friend's house.

(1:43)
I know squirrels carry diseases. I'm not in first grade, you know.
(1:45)
Plus, it was a prank. It's not like I led the squirrels to their doom.
(1:50)
I wanna know is why are you so interested in this?

(1:53)
Hey, I'm stuck in a boring classroom and the only entertaining thing that has happened was your text. Believe me; I'd rather text you than listen.

(1:55)
Pay attention, young grasshopper. You never know if this will be on the test.

(2:00)
Thank you, Master Po.

Mon 27 Fed (1:32pm)
I saw a squirrel three days ago running up a tree. It reminded me of you.

(1:39)
…The fuck are you?

(1:41)
I was the wrong number from last week.

(1:46)
You're that bored? Jeez, what does that guy teach you?

(1:49)
So you do remember me!
(1:52)
Anyway, he's teaching the basics of cooking. Snore fest.

(1:56)
Hey, cooking is delicious.

(1:59)
Dude, I've known this stuff since I was eight years old. It's pretty boring.
(2:01)
Plus, your number popped up in my histories and I wanted to text you and get a bit more info on the whole squirrel incident.

(2:05)
I don't know you. For all I know, you could be a psychopath.
(2:09)
You can cook? Why haven't we met before?

(2:13)
The fact that I have no idea who you are and where you're from.
(2:15)
And really? That's really all you can think about is food?

(2:18)
Charlie.

(2:21)
…Gesundheit?

(2:24)
No, it's my name.

(2:26)
That isn't random at all.

(2:31)
Go back to your learning of the cooking. That way you can make me food.

(2:34)
I don't belong in the kitchen, jackass.

(2:40)
I didn't say that. Go back to your learning.

(2:43)
But I wanna read your story.

(2:47)
Sorry. Looks like story time is gonna happen some other time.
(2:50)
Hey that rhymed!

Mon 5 Mar (1:29pm)
Charlie?
(1:32)
CharlieCharlieCharlieCharlie !

(1:34)
Did you seriously just use my name?

(1:37)
Yes. How else am I suppose to get your attention?

(1:40)
By calmly saying that you wanted to text.
(1:43)
Also, I find it funny how we're always in our normal time slot.

(1:47)
Shut up, I'm bored.
(1:52)
Plus, being bored in this class is the only excuse for me to nag you about that squirrel story.

(1:56)
There isn't a story to it. I promise. Plus, I don't even know you.

(2:01)
Sydney.

(2:05)
What?

(2:13)
That's my name. My name is Sydney.

(2:19)
That isn't random at all.

(2:34)
Shut up!
(2:36)
Plus, I'm the only one who gets to be clever here. Now tell me the squirrel story.

(2:39)
Fine. It was a lame prank that my buddy and I decided to do. We were supposed to do it on my ex-girlfriend, who dumped me for some beach boy, and they accidentally got loose in my buddy's apartment.
(2:41)
Happy now?

(2:46)
Jesus. Who's happy pills did you take in the morning.

(2:50)
Shut it! I'm supposed to be mad at you.

(2:54)
Keep telling yourself that.

(3:02)
Why am I telling you all of this? For all I know, you could be a serial killer. Or a rapist.

(3:05)
I swear, you worry about this stuff after you give out your name.

(3:08)
That's not how it's supposed to work.

(3:13)
Plus, you already wondered if I was a psychopath or not.

(3:17)
The fact you can remember that is scary.

(3:19)
I remember everything! Except birthdays.
(3:21)
Apparently, I suck at remembering names.

(3:27)
You're scary sometimes, you know that.
(3:34)
Plus, who remembers that stuff, anyways?

(3:42)
Whatever. It's something that I'm supposed to do anyways.

(3:45)
Seems pretty boring to me.

(3:52)
It is. Look, I have to go. Class is going to end pretty soon and my professor is
giving me a dirty look.

(3:56)
Hope it's a sexy dirty look.

Mon 12 Mar (1:09pm)
Hey there, Sydney.

(1:14)
May I help you?

(1:17)
Are you okay? You sound bitchy.

(1:24)
I almost got my phone taken away, thank you.
(1:32)
So excuse me if I sound bitchy.

(1:36)
…Are you PSMing?
(1:52)
Hello?
(1:56)
Shit…

Mon 19 Mar (1:16pm)
Sorry about last week.

(1:23)
You're gonna stop being a bitch?

(1:27)
Just be lucky that I don't know you. If I did, I probably would've kicked your ass.

(1:32)
I gotta remember that.
(1:35)
Plus, a friend of mine told me that is was a very dick move to ask if you were PMSing.

(1:38)
I'm sure I'll let you remember when you text me.
(1:43)
No hard feelings, right?

(1:48)
I deserved it anyway. I asked a dick question that I shouldn't have asked.
(1:52)
You're not gonna punch me, are you?

(1:59)
Just be lucky I don't know you when the special time comes.

(2:03)
I'm sure of it. Anyway, what are you learning right now?

(2:09)
What do you think?
(2:12)
It's the same that I've been learning for every Wednesday; the basics of cooking.

(2:15)
Is that why you're texting me? A random stranger from nowhere?

(2:19)
I've seen you're area code. You're not far from me.

(2:23)
Now I have my own personal stalker?

(2:26)
Shut it! I'm not a stalker. I meant that you and I happen to live close to each other.

(2:32)
Ergo, stalker.

(2:37)
Whatever. I just know my area codes is all.

(2:43)
Yet it still makes you sound like a stalker.

(2:44)
You need to know the definition of a stalker, I swear.

(2:49)
Whatever. Look, I have to go. My buddies and I are going to go somewhere fun.

(3:05)
Have fun, asshole!