A Daughters Ramble

Remembering those days

After forgetting them for so long

Listening to the way you would yell

Scream

Curse

I didn't know it then

But you lied

You said it was our fault

You and you alone

Were the only one who hurt her

I finally know that now

It's been years since then

I know I should hate you

Hate you with every part of me

The thing is though

I can't

Why?

Because you're my father

What is a father?

I thought I used to know

But everything I thought

It was a wrong

You're no father

A father is supposed to

Be there for his children and wife

A father is supposed to

Love unconditionally

No, you were not a father

A monster maybe

Yes, a heartless monster

What did we do

To make you hate us so?

I want to know dad

Why?

Question after question

Races through my mind

But for some reason

I can't bring myself to ask

I'm scared of you

Of finding out the truth

Maybe it's time

For me to turn around

Forget

Walk away

From you and the pain you cause

But I can't

I'm to much like you that way dad

I'm persistant

Even with myself

I love you daddy

Even if you can't love me, love us

You are my father

And that means something

I miss you and it's hard sometimes

But I have her

The strongest person I know

My mom

My hero

Another person you hurt

More then words can tell

No dad, I'm stronger without you

I moved on with my life

I may always wonder why

You are the way you are

But I don't need you

Not anymore

I don't know what this is dad

Maybe the ramblings

Of your emotional daughter

My way of reaching out to you

Or maybe this is my way

Of finally letting you go

Yes

I'm walking away daddy

I may never look back

But I love you

At least know that.