|My FanFictionFictionPress Profile
Author: BlackButler.SoulEater.Fan4Ever PM
My full FanFiction profile and my Fiction Press profile continued.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Spiritual - Words: 10,100 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 09-28-12 - Status: Complete - id: 3061674
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
IT'S SO FLUFFY! Smile, it confuses people. Do The Voices In My Head Bother You? For the REVOLUTION in my pants! Oh, hello. I'm Cinderella. I Am erotic. You Are kinky. They Are Perverts. "This is definitely the best type of sharpie to get high off of." BISHIES, BISHIES EVERYWHERE! porn butt porn butt porn butt porn butt NIRVANA Shut up and take your pants off. Special Ed. Google it, bitch. Why yes, I am a ninja. JUSTFUCKINGSMILE! Where the fuck is my... oh found it! "Yes, I want it so bad. Give it to me! I worked so hard for this! Yay, my Pikachu evolved!" To Do List: Loading... Nothing Found. RAINBOWS! Let's be awkward, together. WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD It's fun to be lazy. OH NO! "So you're the bitch that told a bitch that I'm a bitch? Well listen bitch, it takes a bitch to know a bitch, bitch." AMIRITE!? AMIRITE!? The Flying Spaghetti Monster will judge you all. Karma, you missed a few people. PANIC! AT THE DISCO! Viagra, anyone? Kids: Trix are for kids. Rabbit: Well, fuck you too then. JUSTDOIT! 10...9...8...BOOM! FALLOUTBOY Get laid! COME AT ME, BRO! Excuse me? TOTALLY RANDOM! TOTALLY RANDOM! I'm a liar? Not true! war. Stupidity is not a crime. So you're free to go. Faith. Trust. And Cocaine Dust! It's pixie you say? "I DON'T SUFFER FROM INSANITY! I ENJOY EVERY MINUTE OF IT! YAOI FANGIRL YAOI FANGIRL."Kiss her! Just kiss her already!" 22=FISH. 33=EIGHT. 77=TRIANGLE. FUCK HIPSTERS! Life is short. So is your penis..." PEDOBEAR IS COMING FORYOU!" SIMPLEPLAN. Chaos. Panic. Disorder. My work here is done. It's fun being random.
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE OTAKU, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm STRAIGHT so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I'm a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirt (It's actually called a kilt)
I'm a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!...or a Hollow.
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I'm not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I'm STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo's
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I'm GAY so I'm after EVERY straight guy around.
I don't want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK BUT DONT SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.
COPY AND PASTE POLLS:
If you have ever been so wrapped up thinking about anime, anime fan art, or anime fanfictions that you zoned out and came back to reality 5 minutes or more later with no idea of what's going on, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name to the list. Athame Kunoichi, Sugarmonkey778, A Ninja Named Frank, Banryuwielder244, angelic memories, philippinocherryblossom, Nyanonymous, craZy_goth_friendZ, jinxedpixie kindalkiddwashere AkatsukiFreak31, Lady Yuuki, hidakakufangirl, Soul's Potential Stalker, The Mask for Insainity, .Fan4Ever
Instead of saying "Great, only two reviews." I say, "Holy crap! Two reviews!" Then jump around like a maniac in my joy. Paste this to your profile if you're one of those people who would be jumping with me.
Copy the evil bunny to become one of his minions! MUAHAHAHAHAH!
If you have ever burst out laughing about something in a book, and people look at you wierd, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have a tendency to talk/sing to yourself copy and paste this to your profile.
Have you ever tried having a thumb war with yourself? I have. If you have just tried having a thumb war with yourself, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do (which is ALOT), copy this in your profile.
If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this in it to make it even longer.
If you like animals, give one a home if you can. If you already have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this into your profile
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think those stupid kids should just give that god-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, then copy this into your profile.
If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turky Bird thing shoud go to rehab, copy this into your profile.
If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you have an iPod and love rocking out to it, post this in your profile.
If you would love to have wings, post this in your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. (Yeah... It's two right now)
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile. (Gets really aggravating after a while...)
If you have ever ran into a mirror, copy this into your profile .
If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and pastethis into your profile.
If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile. (Right after I finished reading the sign...)
If you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your profile. (Stupid immobile walls...)
If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile. (All the time...)
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this onto your profile. (Yup, usually during awkward or normal silences...)
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile. (...twenty...)
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. (You're on it)
92 of teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch or American Eagle said it was uncool to breathe. if you are part of the 8 that would stand there and laugh you ass off, copy and paste this into your profile. (Every time... ;p)
If you have ever turned around and questioned how you got on those subjects after an entire conversation, copy and paste this in to your profile. (Unfortuneately...All the time)
If you complian that your feet are cold and your mom tells you to put socks on and you dont just for the sake of being stubborn, copy and paste this to your profile. (...Guilty...)
If you think 'morning people' should be driven off the face of the planet so they spread their 6-AM cheer to Martians, copy and paste this to your profile. (Only if the martians don't give them back.)
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you are weird and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile. (So many times,!)
If you have ever fallen up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think people who are meant to be together always find their way in the end, copy and paste this into you profile.
If you have ever made up a word because you wanted to expand your vocabulary, copy and paste into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile
Pluto was no longer declared a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was 'too small' and 'off its orbit' for a couple scientists likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!
You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on.
Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading.
You write fanfictions about the book.
You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else in the entire world) to read it.
Everything reminds you of the book.
You quote random lines all the time.
You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class
You've read a book more than five times.
You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days.
You've found yourself trying to impersonate a character.
Copy and paste if you were nodding and laughing because this sounds so much like you.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, Insane Winged Girl, MysticalPearl,MaxWing,sk8rchickmax,Blackwingsrainbowtips, MyNameIsCAL,Fangtastic, Techno Skittles, All-American Anteater, XxItalianChaos17xX, .Fan4Ever
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen down the stairs copy this on your profile
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this on your profile
If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull or vice versa copy and paste this on your profile
If there are times you just want to annoy people for the heck of it, copy and paste this on your profile
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two goose are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, then why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If your random and proud of it, copy this into your profile!
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Revenant666, darkflame1516, AirGirl Phantom, Agent of the Divine One, pointless people of Pluto, ZeratheNightDancer, Acegik13, Ryuu-Chiyo, Akemi-Chiyo, Archangel's Requiem, Opresiminya,Black Demon Cat, darklightningdevil, 13IsTaLkThEaKaTsUkI13, RainLily13, InaLaInu, SilverWolfAshes, soulstealer55, AngelofFluffiness, All-American Anteater, XxItalianChaos17xX, .Fan4Ever
ANIMES I HAVE WATCHED:
Ouran High School Host Club
Nabari no Ou
La Corda d'Oro
Alice in the Country of Hearts
Neo Angelique Abyss
TO DO LIST:
1. See if bookworms bounce.
2. Achieve this by throwing self down stairs.
3. Find something to become obsesssed with.
4. Research the word 'Oxymoronic'.
5. Prove everyone else wrong.
experiments into the electrical conductivity of cheese.
7. Work out what the heck E=MC2 means.
8. Conquer the world. Before breakfast.
9. Put some Ragu on a sled, and push it down a hill.
10. Kidnap an imaginary book character.
11. Sharpen hockey stick.
12. Hit someone with aforementioned hockey stick.
13. Find somewhere to hide from police.
14. Run around screaming 'The angels have got the phone box!' Note how many odd looks, panicked expressions, laughs and weird burst of blue light I get.
15. Buy chocolate spread. Have it on crumpets.
16. Become a master hypnotist.
17. Hypnotize a pineapple.
18. Lick my elbow.
19. Paint the entire house bright green.
20. Find something rhyming with 'silver'.
21. Find how many people think 'orange' sonds like 'guillible', when said slowly.
Hey, look! # 22 is missing!
24. Find Itex. Blow it up.
25. Actually, get some bombs. And an AK-47. Then blow Itex up.
26. Grow wings.
27. Get admitted to a mental institution, then initiate a mass break-out.
28. Spontaneously combust.
29. Find out where they store the Rubellium...
30. Kill whoever thought up homework. In worst way possible.
31. For the above, I need the TARDIS. Gp find that first. And steal it. And run away from a very angry Doctor about to skewer me with a sonic screwdriver.
32. Work out where the pretty lights come from.
33. Find number 22.
34. Try not to think about fluorrescent penguins for a whole 5 minutes.
35. Duck punches currently being aimed at head.
36. Laugh manically.
37. Create a horcrux. Actually, make someone who I really hate do it.
38. Breath underwater.
39. Grab a random passer by. Waltz with them.
40. Convince somebody that there are faries living under the earth.
41. Eat pot of pesto. With no pasta.
42. Become emo ninja.
43. Scream 'I like CHEESE!' whenever anyone asks you a question. Then proceed to hop in circles before collapsing on the ground.
44. Squirt ketchup all over furniture. Claim to have been attacked by vengfull nargles.
45. Look for missing socks. If in doubt, ask Iggy.
46. Do homework that was due in for last week.
47. Listen to song. Over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over, until imprinted on conciousness.
48. Teach everyone the dead pinyata dance.
49. Play with fire.
50. Run away to join the circus.
51. Get another chainsaw. Last one broke half way through sawing someones head off...
52. Hit people over the head for no appareent reason, before running away. Cackle manically while doing so.
53. Repeat what people say. At the exact time they say it. Ooh, tricky. You need to be phsycic for this.
54. If someone says they're worried, reply with, 'Don't worry. I've got a toothpick. Nothing can go wrong!'
55. Add 'doom' on the end of everything, eg. 'Please pass me the carrots of doom' or 'That rabbit of doom doesn't look very well, does it?'
56. Mkae asbltoeuly no sesne.
57. Find an obscure town in an obscure country on Google Earth. Tell everyone it has the key to immortality somewhere near it.
58. Poke rocks. If asked why, say, 'For no good reason.'
59. Stare at the sky. When a sizeable number of people have joined the staring, quitely walk away, and observe from a nearby, comfortable spot just how long the crowd stays there.
60. Become paranoid.
61. Ask a complete stranger if they'll marry me. Propose using a grapefruit.
62. Hit people over the head with books.
63. Hide computer first, so it doesn't get confiscated... like last time...
64. Hide it underground.
65. Hope seismology sensors don't pick up the vibrations...
66. KETCHUP SANDWICHES!
67. Lizxy... hehehehehehe... hehehehehehehehe... Lizxy, hehehehe...
68. Hoard all the shiny stuff in house. Pile it on chair. Say, over and over, 'My precious!' in creepy Golum accent.
69. Get a motto. Something odd.
70. Wonder if anyone is actually reading this.
71. Turn all the baked bean cans upside down in Tescos. If questioned, it was caused by a bump in the fabric of the time-space continuim...
YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN 2012 WHEN...
1. You've dropped your iPhone or iPod in the toilet because you brought it to the bathroom with you.
2. Your uncle living out of state is stockpiling for the fast-approaching apocalypse and is taking survival classes.
3. You are using your phone to listen to music and your iPod to text your friends.
4. During movies with lots of explosives you yawn.
5. If you don't respond to a text within three minutes, people will assume that you're dead.
5. Your mom is starting to shop for groceries online.
6. Being weird is widely accepted and is now a type of clique at school.
7. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
8. You were to busy to notice that there were two fives.
9. Hah! I got you! You know I did. Copy this if you looked.
WORDS OF WISDOM:
Intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put the tomato in a fruit salad.
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Already have the shovel to bury the body of the person that made you cry.
FRIENDS: Will pass you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.
FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.
FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and runs.
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.
FRIENDS: Will hide you from the cops.
BEST FRIENDS: Are probably the reason they're after you in the first place.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the cell with you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food (That sooooo reminds me of me and my best friend :) It's not my fault her food is so damn yum hahaha)
FRIENDS: Will help me find your way when I'm lost.
BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with your compass, stealing your map and giving you bad directions.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Would ask for something
BEST FRIENDS: Would snatch it off you without permission
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'M HOME!"
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college.
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say, "Girl drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste!"
FRIENDS: Would read and ignore this.
BEST FRIENDS: Will re-post this shit!
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
Girls Don't Realize These Things
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care
But most of all
For not being sorry anymore
That you can't accept me for who I am
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.
That I cared
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.
Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.
If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'
If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things' I really wish that more guys were like this, and I bet alot of girls do too!
Your Guy Side
You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
Its hilarious when people get hurt
You've played with/against boys on a team
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an XBOX
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect baseball/football cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
Its kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, blue, red, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night. (Navy Blue Tye-Dye Knee-highs!)
YOUR GIRL SIDE
You wear lip gloss/chapstick.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheer leading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe. (I don't own any.)
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance. (I am.)
It takes you around/more than one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up. (Showering takes up about half of that time, 5 for dressing, 15 for makeup, and 10 for reading FanFiction.)
You smile a lot more than you should. (A lot less.)
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes. (11.)
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can. (I could care less about dresses. I can't move in them. Or skirts and skorts for that matter.)
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as a little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it. (I got my brother to test out a look for me, I actually got him to sit still for eyeliner.)
Like being the star of everything. (I've tap danced during lunch, it's obvious.)
EVER WONDER Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( That's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how?...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...And you thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off of those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (And.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's Peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (...Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Pick your birth month Italic anything that doesn't apply to you Bold the five-ten that best apply to you Copy to your own journal, with all twelve months underneath. (Skip to December if you don't want to go through the rest of the year.)
JANUARY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people's flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love.Loves children (I don't hate all children just the annoying ones!). Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.
FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.
MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.
APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. . Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.
MAY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.
JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay (Why there aren't many stories are up). Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds (Never had one in my life). Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.
JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
AUGUST: Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride in oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.
SEPTEMBER: Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people's mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work confidentSensitive. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.
OCTOBER: Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to take things at the center . Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.
NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.
DECEMBER: ME! Loyal and generous. Sexy. Patriotic. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Short tempered. Changing personality. Not egotistic. Take high pride in oneself. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical.
A POEM I FOUND ON CHILD ABUSE! PLEASE PASS IT ON!
My name is Tiffany I am three,
My eyes are swollen I cannot see,
I must be stupid I must be bad,
What else could have made My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me.
I can't do a wrong I can't speak at all
Or else I'm locked up All day long.
When I'm awake, I'm all alone
The house is dark My folks aren't home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car My daddy is back
From Charlie's bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself Against the wall
I try to hide From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me And yells at me more,
I finally get free And run to the door
He's already locked it And i start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken,
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much to late His face has been twisted
Into an unimaginable shape The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy! O please let it end!
And he finally stops And heads for the door
While I lay there motionless Brawled on the floor
My name is Tiffany
I am three,
Tonight my daddy
And you can help. This sickens me to the top of my soul. And if you read this and don't pass it on, I pray for your forgiveness. Because you would have to be one heartless person to not be effected by this poem, and because you are affected, do something about it! So all i ask you to do Is pass this on!
IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE
Things You Don't Want to Hear While in Surgery
#Wait, if that's the spleen, then what's this?
#Ya know... there's big money in kidneys... and this guy's got two of 'em
#Ok, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
#This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
#BO BO! Come back with that! Bad dog!
10 BEST THINGS ABOUT BEING A GIRL
10. We can wear guy clothes, but if they wear ours they get funny looks
9. At least one girl always survives in horror movies
8. We can put cotton between our toes and paint our nails without feeling the least bit silly
7. Our magazines have horiscopes
6. Girls with guy first names like Taylor sound cool, but it doesn't work the other way around
5. Our friends don't say "hi" but punching us in the arm
4. Yes PMS sucks, but at least we have an excuse to lay around eating chocolate once a month
3. Make-up covers any imperfections we may have
2. If we flirt with a cop, we can get out of a speeding ticket
1. Girl Talk... you know, the way we all just understand each other without having to explain a thing
WOOT! GO CHICKS!
Take a walk in the house with a toothbrush.
Read the text on a shampoo bottle.
Laugh ay our own jokes when we haven't even shared it.
Push a door when it clearly says 'PULL'.
We ask, 'What?' when we understand everything perfectly.
Hate it when the wind messes up our hair.
Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything.
Have to call our own phones to find it.
Check the time on our phones when we are wearing a watch.
Turning our pillow around so we sleep on the cold side.
When we stay up late, we count how many hours of sleep we get.
Smiling while reading this.:)
Copy and paste this if you are happy being a girl.:)
HOMOPHOBIA IS GAY
I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am not one of the lucky ones.
I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised.
The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the woman who died when the EMT s stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn't have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson"
-IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... REPOST THIS-
Me: How Could you!? I trusted you and you cheated on me!
Me: Oh, sorry Dad. That was meant for Jim.
Dad: On a completely unrelated topic, have you seen my shotgun anywhere?
-A 15 year old girl holds hands with her 1 year old son. People call her a slut, no one knows she was raped at 13.
-People call another Guy fat, No one knows he has a serious disease causing him to be overweight.
-People call an old man ugly, No one knew he had a serious injury to his face while fighting for our country in the war.
Repost this if you are against bullying and stereotyping. We bet 95% of you won't.
IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART.
Mummy... Johnny brought a gun to school. He told his friends that it was cool. And when he pulled the trigger back, it shot with a great crack. Mummy I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold. But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye. I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry. When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another. And all because he got the gun from his older brother. Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much. And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush. And tell my little sister that she is the only one now. And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now. And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best. Mummy I'm not the first. I'm no better than the rest. Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class, and never forget this, and please don't let this pass. Mummy why'd it have to be me? No one deserves this. Mummy warn the others, Mummy I left without a kiss, and Mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try, I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry. Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest, but Mummy, please remember I'm in heaven with the rest. Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack. Mummy listen to me, if you would I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new. I guess I'm not going with daddy on that trip to the new zoo. I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a child, I wanted to be an actress. Mummy I wanted to live, but Mummy I must go now. The time is getting late. Mummy tell my Chris I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date. I love you, Mummy I always have. I know you know it's true. Mummy all I wanted to say is "Mummy I love you" In memory of the Colombian students that were lost. Please if you would, pass this around. I'd be happy if you could. Don't smash this on the ground. If you pass this on, maybe people will cry. Just keep this in heart, for the people that didn't get to say "goodbye". Now you have two choices 1) repost and show you care 2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart (Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)
Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black."
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple.
And yet you have the nerve to call me colored"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Edward is NOT a vampire.
He lives in the woods.
He doesn't kill humans.
He glitters in the sun.
He is OBVIOUSLY a fairy.