Chapter 14- Confessions

I walked home from the funeral. The church was only two miles away, so I got home in about twenty minutes. I took off my shoes and before I could take three steps into the house, I was confronted by my mother.

"Hey sweetheart. I made some chicken alfredo for dinner, it's in the kitchen." How sweet. She knows that chicken alfredo is my favorite.

"I'm alright mom, I'm just not hungry right now. I'll have some later though." She walks over to me and starts rubbing my back. I'm not really that close to my mom, but I wish I could stand there forever. Just because I'm hiding my emotions, doesn't mean I don't have them.

"Alli, sweetheart. I can tell you were close to that boy. And being there when he died… Well I couldn't even imagine that. You are being so strong right now, and I'm so proud of you. You can take all the time you want, alright? We're all here for you." All I could manage was a nod and I slowly walked up the stairs, changing out of my dress into a pair of black sweats. I grabbed my dog tags and put them on, shoving them under my sweatshirt. Not having enough energy to take my hair down or take off my heavy makeup, I slumped back down the stairs. My mom was putting some of the pasta into a Ziploc container for later. She heard me and turned around.

"Alex isn't home tonight, he's over at a friend's house. If you want to go play his Xbox downstairs you can," Alex, my older brother, always claims the Xbox downstairs that's connected to our flat screen, so I get to use the little dinosaur television. I nodded and walked downstairs to the basement, turning the Xbox on, and logging into my account. Within thirty seconds, Anthony sent me a party invite, and I joined it.

"Finally, something to do! I've been watching YouTube for like, an hour now, because nobody's been on. Where have you been?" Anthony said in all one breath. I didn't respond at first, not knowing what to say. "Alli? Is your mic muted?"

"No."

"Okay… then where were you at?"

"A funeral."

He paused. "Oh… oh my god, I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"It's fine. I'm okay."

"Who was it?"

"My friend Jesse, from camp."

He wasn't sure what to say. I got up and put Halo: Reach into the Xbox. "Were you guys close?"

I nodded, even though he couldn't see me. "Yeah, we were close… Anthony, listen. This camp that I went to isn't what it seems."

"What do you mean?"

And at that moment, I explained every detail to him. From the moment I showed up to this moment now, I told him about everything that I've been through, all of the events and the emotions paired with them. He didn't say a word to interrupt me, which ironically worried me. He tends to interrupt me to ask questions or state his opinion, which I don't mind, because I do that too. But I guess I would've been angry if he did interrupt. I told him everything though, everything but two things: One, that I signed him up as my asset. And two, that I got shot when Jesse did. He paused for a while.

"Wow… I had no idea."

But even though I told him everything, I still didn't feel any better.

"Yeah. Me neither."

I turned off the Xbox and laid down on the couch, not able to sleep, and not able to move.