i really wanted us to matter to each other

because you're a writer and i'm a writer, and you're sad and i'm sad, and you're angry and i'm angry. but you push past me in the kitchen and slam the cabinet and tighten your muscles; your body advertises your need to break something and all i've ever wanted to break is myself

so i'll leave us as two unstable elements, this layer of oil between us so we'll never really touch.