You lean over to my ear and whisper.

"Tell me you love me."

My heart flutters and my hopes rise, for a split second.

Then, I smell it on your breath, and see you glassy eyes, your giddy smile.

My hope sinks, down into my chest, splashing into the pool of tears drained below.

You don't know what you're saying. Your voice is hot, and sultry.

I swallow hard and force a smile your way.

I can still pretend you do. That you mean it. That you are sober.

That you won't forget this after tomorrow's hangover.

"I love you"

The words come out playful, imaginary, and surreal.

You're too wasted to hear the real truth behind it.

Too drunk to know that I mean it, that I'm not just humoring you.

I really do love you.

You won't even remember me saying this...won't even remember this moment.

You kiss my cheek.

"I love you" you say.

A single tear falls from my eye,

catching the light as it runs down the contours of my face.

Torture.

You take my chin in your hand and slowly lick the tear from my lips,

where it has decided to rest for a brief moment.

You don't realize that you're only causing more to form.

I stand up, quickly pushing you away and I walk.

Faster and faster, until I am running.

Fast and furious, fast and far, away from all of this.

Away, away, away...right now.

The only words I can think, running through my mind like movie credits:

Please God, Forgive him, he knows not what he does.

And then the tears cascade.