|The Funny Thing Is
Author: MelzDayDreamer19 PM
Just random thoughts and feelings about random things that may or may not happen to you. Basically just my thoughts on things and stories about things that have happened to me.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 44,453 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 04-02-13 - Published: 11-16-12 - id: 3074917
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Let's play a game of guess the celebrity shall we!?
Ok here are your clues:
The celebrity just recently hit puberty
The celebrity is secretly in the closet (gay)
The celebrity smoked a joint and caused teenage girls all over the globe to cut themselves
The mother fucker's from Canada
If you guessed Justin Bieber, you'd be correct. And I now bring us to today's topic of interest.
I thought that the Toronto Maple Leafs were a disgrace to Canadians (and hockey), I was wrong. I honestly can't believe that we Canadians bred that. Like when this bitch first corrupted the minds of girls and made his name known, I was somewhat proud that he was from Canada. Then I saw a picture of what he wore to meet the president; he looked like a gay farmer and anyone who disagrees, please go get your eyes checked because I'm pretty sure you're fuckin blind. I don't know what the fuck went through his mind, like did he just wake up and be all like 'OMG I'm going to meet the president today, better dress like a gay farmer!' (Say that in your head or out loud in a gay girly voice). Out of all the 1000 outfits he owns, he chose that. If he didn't have something "decent" enough to wear, I'm pretty fuckin sure he could've went out and bought a whole outfit! If anyone dares try to tell me that he didn't have anything to wear and that he didn't plan to dress like a gay farmer, I'm going to most likely bitch you out and tell you that he defiantly planned that.
Moving on from that…
This bitch (Justin Bieber) basically caused like a tidal wave of madness across the world. All because this bitched smoked some weed; tons of bitches worldwide started cutting themselves. Like for the love of all things half normal, why the fuck would you cut yourself because some bitch smoked a joint!? Out of all the stupid things I have ever heard of people doing, I think cutting yourself because a celebrity smoked a joint is on the top of the list. Now before I continue let me make it perfectly clear that I don't have a problem with people who cut themselves, I honestly could give less of a fuck, If I don't have to watch you do it I don't care. I do suggest that you get some help with that though because that is kind of a problem, but really that's not my problem so in the end I don't care. What I have a problem with is the fact that because Justin Bieber smoked a joint, girls went all insane and started cutting themselves over it. I just find that funny even though it's I guess sad in a way, but when I first heard that I laughed for at least 5 minutes straight. Like when my friend made a post on Facebook about this, I thought it was like some joke or something. That was before I went on Twitter and saw that cut for Bieber was trending and before I saw the disturbing pictures I saw of girls arms with bleeding cuts all across their arms. That not only was completely disturbing but the blood just oozing out of the cuts made me just want to throw up all over the place. Just recalling that now and how it looked makes me just want to throw up now, it's just not right at all. Like if you're going to cut yourself and stuff, please for my sake and anyone else don't post pictures of "it" on the internet. Then if the girls cutting wasn't bad enough, some bitch committed suicide over it! I think it's safe to say that there is not hope for humanity if shit like this continues to happen. Like if you look at the whole picture, all the cutting and the suicide just doesn't make sense to me really. What the fuck was the purpose of all that? Like do you honestly think that you cutting yourself and committing suicide is really going to stop him from smoking weed (that is if he continues to, or you know it was just a onetime thing)? He's famous; let him do what he wants! If he gives a crap about his fans he won't do it again or ya know keep it a secret; unless he's a heartless bitch, in that case he doesn't give a fuck. It bugs me when people have a total spaz over what people want to do or what they do with their lives, let them do whatever the fuck they want! You do what you want with your life and they'll do what they want with theirs. Simple as that.
Now I don't just hate the fact that he caused basically a riot and turned girls freakin insane. I have a serious hate against Justin Bieber because he's just recently infected my younger 11 year old sister with Bieber fever. Holy shit, I've hated this gay faggot for quite some time and this hatred wasn't as bad as after my sister was infected with this life threatening disease. I refuse to go into my sister's room now, her walls are covered from top to bottom with posters and pictures of him, and if that wasn't bad enough she has a comforter and sheets with his face on them. It's fuckin disturbing, she basically has a shrine to him in her bedroom. I won't go in there because I just feel completely uncomfortable; like my mother decided to shampoo the carpet in my room once before I got home from school so the carpet was still wet when I went upstairs when I got home. Normally when I get home the first thing I do is change from jeans to sweat pants, well obviously I couldn't go into my room because for one I didn't want my socks to get wet and two my mother was yelling at me not to go into my room till the carpet was dry. My mother was in a good mood so she told me that she put a pair of my sweat pants on my sister's bed so I could change into them in my sister's room. Now I don't know about anyone else if they were in this situation but I was completely uncomfortable changing in there; like from every angle no matter where I turned there was always a set of Justin Bieber's eyes staring at my ass. It was just totally disturbing. Like I have posters up in my room on the walls but I don't have a shrine like my sister. It honestly just pisses me off that above all the annoying famous bitches she could've chosen to model herself after, she chooses Justin Bieber. Like W T to the F? I think I would've been more satisfied if she had chosen Selena Gomez or anyone else. If she starts smoking weed because her "role model" does, I'm going to hunt that mother fuckin little gay famer dressing bitch down and punch him in the face. I can't even tell you exactly how many times I have seen Justin Bieber's movie Never Say Never at this point; it's just always on the TV. And if you think his voice is annoying now, try listening to it in surround sound. It's like the little bitch is performing right in your fuckin living room.
I don't know if anyone remembers, and if you do you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. I can't remember if it was last year or the year before that this bitch claimed that she gave birth to Justin Bieber's kid. This was like one of the most hilarious scadels from the celebrity world I have ever heard, it was just priceless. This bitch claimed that Justin Bieber took her back stage at his concert to the bathroom to have sex with her. She claimed that he wanted her to be his first time. The funny thing is, she was like I think 19 or 20 something at the time, I can't fuckin remember all the details and honestly I'm just too damn lazy to go Google it, so if you want the exact details you know what to do. Anyway she was waaayyyyy older than him, and he was 16 I believe, so basically she had sex in a bathroom with a minor. Which is illegal I believe in most parts of the world. So anyway this bitch took him to court trying to get money or whatever the fuck from him and she demanded he take some test proving that he was the father. What I found that was really funny was the fact that the press never really revealed if it was really his kid or not, the whole drama over kind of just POOF went away. This bitch must've been like stupid to think that people would believe her, but dumbasses did. Let me just make a list of all the celebrities that he's either hit on or liked:
I think I made a point there, that Justin Bieber wouldn't ever go anywhere near the bitch that claims she had his kid. Like all you have to do is Google it and take a look at what the bitch looks like. She looks like something my cat shit out last week. If you still believe that shit, all you have to do is look at a picture of this bitch and then look at a picture of Beyonce. I'm pretty sure that explains A LOT.
Main point, I hate Justin Bieber. Him smoking weed and causing girls to cut themselves and one girl to commit suicide to me is like the 7th sign that the world is going to end. If society wasn't completely fucked and a total piss off, it is now; and bitches are just fucking crazier than ever. Like I just cannot get over the stupidity of some people. He's even more of a disgrace to Canada then the Toronto Maple Leafs and that's saying something considering that the Toronto Maple Leafs suck some major league balls when it comes to hockey. I swear he's gay, I wish he'd just be like Taylor Lautner and just come out of the closet already instead of hiding in there like David Archuleta. So I decided to put a picture of Justin Bieber in my closet since he's in the closet. My friends always ask me why I have a picture of Justin Bieber in my closet, I always respond by saying 'Because he's in the closet'. Though none of them get the whole joke behind it though, I haven't had one friend yet understand the joke behind it; they just look at me funny, while I'm standing there laughing.
Well hope you enjoyed today's chapter! Big thanks goes out to my gay neighbor for giving me the idea. Tomorrow's chapter is on annoying music videos, I'm not sure how I'm going to do this one. I might just post a link to a music video to Youtube so you all can watch it and then just talk about why the hell it's annoying or why the music video makes no fucking sense (Taylor Swift's Never getting back together will defiantly be in the chapter). Ya, I think I'm going to do that.
Hilary Duff and Taylor Swift,
P.S. If you have any request what so ever on music videos you find annoying, feel free to send me (Private message or in a review) one and I shall feature it in the chapter tomorrow, so make sure to send your requests by 7:00pm tomorrow (remember I live in Canada so you might want to figure out what time that is wherever you are)!