Author: The Amazing Steve PM
Not a very creative title, but it says it all. I'm depressed, and this is my story. Can anyone help me? Rated T cuz I'm paranoid.Rated: Fiction T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 12,844 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 05-12-13 - Published: 11-21-12 - id: 3076349
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
One of these days, I'll post the day I want to post. Anyway, here's what I wanted to post yesterday. And I apologize in advance if anyone is insulted by anything I say, but I'm just quoting my parents.
Friday, December 7, 2012
I'm in a really good mood right now. Today I started off feeling crappy and depressed as usual - actually, I think I was more depressed than usual. But instead of sulking in the hallway for my friends to ignore me, I went to my art classroom to hand in a permission slip for a field trip. She wasn't there, so I turned around to go back to my locker. Suddenly, there was Kyle. Now usually when I see him in the hallway, he either doesn't see me or just chooses not to say anything to me. But today he said "Hey," and smiled at me. I said hey and smiled back, trying to hold back a huge grin. I kinda felt like one of those love-sick crazy people, because I wanted to jump up and down and squeal like one of those annoying fangirls when they see Justin Bieber (DEATH TO JB!). Still, I felt good for the rest of the day (except basketball, but that doesn't count). I got really girly though, and started drawing multi-colored hearts in my notes when the teacher wasn't looking. Just having him notice me helped me to get through the day without feeling depressed. Not that anyone wanted to listen to me tell them what happened, but for once I didn't care.
My friends Lily, Liz, Sarah, Carmen, and Reanne all sit at my lunch table, and Megan and some of her friends sit at the table next to ours. I don't like Liz that much. One time, a group of popular bitches stole Megan's table, so she came and sat with us. There was plenty of room, but Liz started bitching about how Megan was taking up so much space (look who's talking, fat ass) and she should find her own table because we had all been sitting here since the beginning of the year. So I was like, "So what? You're acting like we can't make new friends and let them sit with us."
She said, "No, I'm not saying that."
"Yeah, that's EXACTLY what you're saying!" Then I stormed off to the bathroom.
So today, Lily was absent, and Sarah and Carmen were late getting to lunch. So Liz decided to bring all her friends to the table - who all hate me. It was way too awkward, and I couldn't find Carmen and Sarah, so I sat alone with Megan.
And after all this shit, Liz still thinks I'm her friend. I've tried being her friend, but all she does is insult my friends and annoy the crap out of me. At least I had that memory of Kyle smiling at me to make me feel better. For once in my life love doesn't hurt.
My parents are racist bitches. That's why I don't talk about anything with them. It all started in second grade. I told my parents I had a crush on these two guys in my class, so they looked them up in my yearbook. Here's what they said: "You can't like them, they're black." So what, am I not allowed to date someone who isn't the same race as me? I still liked them for a whole two more years and my parents didn't know SHIT. Because after that day in second grade, I never trusted them with my secrets ever again. Another time, Chad was picking on me for dating Alex (which I wasn't) and my parents overheard. (PS I don't like him anymore it's strictly Kyle). When I denied it, my dad was like, "Good. No slanted-eyed babies" because he was Korean. I really don't understand what's wrong with them. They're constantly insulting my friends because they aren't white like us. They act like what's on the inside doesn't count, when I'm only friends with those people because they're good people... except Lily. I'm friends with her because she's NOT a good person most of the time. She's not just flat out mean, but mean with a sense of humor... ya know? Anyway, I'm getting off topic. My parents are mean and unsupporting (did I ever mention they won't let me have a boyfriend until I'm 17? if they only knew...) and I can't really trust them at all. And it's really annoying, because there is all this shit I would like to tell them, but I know they're just gonna yell at me, so I keep it all to myself and maybe tell my friends. But none of them understand my problems. I've tried telling them before, but they just don't get it. They act like there's an easy, simple answer to all my problems. When in reality, there's never a simple answer to anything. Hell, sometimes there isn't even a freakin answer.
Ok, now I'm angry. Goodbye
~The Amazing Steve
Again, I apologize if anyone was offended by the racist comments made by my parents. It's kinda embarrassing...