|Waiting For You (To Love Me Back)
Author: sailor skippy PM
Being in love with someone who doesn't love you back is hard. Especially when you're both guys and the other guy is straight. I really need to stop being so touchy-feely with Heath. That probably won't happen, though./ Porter's in love with his best friend, Heath, who's very aware of this love. M/M slash (rated T for drug use)Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 31,955 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 03-13-13 - Published: 12-12-12 - id: 3082375
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
The sound of cursing and rapid gunshots woke me from my slumber and I groaned, not quite ready to wake up. For a few seconds I laid in bed trying my best to ignore the loud noises before it suddenly clicked in my brain that today was Thursday and we had school. I flung the covers off and sat up, glancing at the clock to see it was 10:14. I calmed down when I realized Heath must've turned off the alarm, not intending for us to go to school today.
I put on a pair of jeans and changed into one of the shirts I keep in Heath's room before heading to the bathroom to relieve myself, washing off my face and brushing my teeth afterwards. As I walked down the hallway into the living room the noises from the TV grew louder until I saw Heath sitting on the couch, headset on his head and game controller in hand.
"Morning, Sleeping Beauty," He grinned and looked at me.
"Morning," I replied and shuffled to the kitchen, chuckling as I heard Heath grumble into the headset's microphone.
"I was talking to Porter, you dumbass,"
The only decent breakfast food in the fridge was half a bagel, so I popped it in the toaster and grabbed the peanut butter from the cabinet. Once I was finished preparing my food I made my way to Heath and took a seat on the floor in front of him, causing him to open his legs a bit more so I could lean back on the couch properly.
"Taylor and the guys say hi," Heath informed me and I took a bite of my bagel.
"They skipped school too?"
Heath nodded and sighed, now turning his attention to the voices coming from the headset, "No, I'm not gonna give Port the earphones so you can talk to him. You're probably gonna talk shit about me," He paused, angrily pressing a few buttons before growing a satisfied smile, "Eat that, bitches."
"Who's winning?" I wasn't particularly interested in the game, but it made for conversation.
"It's at a tie right now," Heath frowned and then rolled his eyes, heaving out a dramatic sigh, "Fine guys, but only for a few minutes."
I turned around and looked at Heath as he paused the game, then he removed his headset only to place it over my ears, "They wanna talk to you."
"Uh," I faced forward so I was looking at the TV again and I greeted them, "Hey?"
"Porter!" I recognized the voice as Taylor's.
"Hey Taylor, what's up?"
"Same old," He groaned, "Tell Heath to go to the building on the north corner."
I relayed the information to Heath and he grunted in acknowledgement. Taylor asked for me to tell Heath something else, and I leaned my head back so it rested against the edge of the couch.
"He also wants you to change guns or whatever," I finished the bagel and licked off my figners before wiping them on my jeans.
Heath grunted again and I rolled my eyes and lifted my head from the couch, "Taylor, I think Heath's turning into a caveman."
Taylor laughed and Heath grunted once more louder, shoving his toes into my very ticklish side. I cringed away and screeched, "Heath stop!"
"Ooh, what's happening on your side Porter? Sounds like fun!"
I scrunched my nose, trying to put a face to the new voice, and I straightened up when I found a match, "Chicka-chicka Dave!"
"Oh no," He sighed, and I heard two people laughing.
"Hey bro," He greeted, simply.
"Anyone else?" I asked.
"Nope! Just us," Dave informed. He then yelled angrily, "Shit! Porter, tell Heath he's a piece of shit."
"Heath, you're a piece of shit,"
"I'm guessing that was from Dave?"
I nodded and Heath chuckled, leaning forward and putting his elbows on my shoulders, the controller now in front of my face.
"Are you gonna join in on the game?" It took a second for me to realize that Greg was talking to me, and I shook my head before remembering that he couldn't see me.
"No – I don't find video games very fun,"
"You're such a girl, Porter," Taylor joked.
"Like, ohmygod, did you really just say that?" I gasped, speaking in an annoying falsetto voice.
"You should totally meet my girlfriend," Greg laughed, "You two would definitely get along."
"Dude, don't feed your girlfriend's weird obsession with gay guys," Dave groaned. "Soon she'll be asking you to make out with guys."
Greg erupted with laughter, "As long as they're cute, I'm down! You up for it Porter?"
I could see Greg winking in my mind and I scoffed jokingly, "Well gee, girls like me come with a price you know? Who said I kiss on the first date?"
The boys all laughed and I heard Heath hum in confusion above me.
"You're such a fag Greg," Taylor laughed, but then stopped, "Oh shit, I hope that didn't offend you Porter."
Dave mumbled, "Good going dumbass," and I smiled.
"Puh-lease. It'll take a lot more than that to offend me. All is well,"
Taylor sighed in relief and Greg clarified, "I'm not gay, by the way. I'm perfectly comfortable with my heterosexuality, but to be honest I wouldn't mind kissing a guy."
As I chuckled at what Greg said Heath slouched down further to look at me, "What are you guys talking about?"
Heath nearly choked and I laughed. Apparently the guys heard and they laughed as well.
"Speaking of," Dave began, "What's it like to kiss Heath?"
My eyes widened in confusion and embarrassment before I remembered – Oh yeah, everyone thinks Heath and I are dating.
"Why? Are you planning on kissing him?" I asked defensively.
"No, no!" His response was rushed.
"Dave just likes sticking his nose in other people's relationships since he's single," Greg teased.
"But seriously?" Dave egged on.
Flushing, I stuttered, "Um, well we… er. It's like…uh,"
"Holy shit, you guys haven't kissed yet?" I cursed Taylor in my head.
"That's surprising, considering he likes to move pretty fast," Dave informed.
"Oh really?" I glanced over at Heath and he sent me a questioning look.
"You didn't know that?"
"We never really talked about stuff like that," I wasn't very interested in the love life of Heath, that is, unless it had something to do with me.
The two of us had a bit of a mutual agreement. He never told me about the things he did with girls, and I stayed oblivious to the fact that he was a sexually active teenager and did things with people that weren't me.
"Well shit," I frowned at Taylor's response and slumped my shoulders, "I guess that's the end of this conversation."
My shoulders lifted up and I sat forward, "Wait, now you've got me interested."
"What's going on?" Heath asked and I raised my hand as a sign for him to be quiet. He huffed and sunk back into the couch.
"I don't really feel comfortable talking about it with his boyfriend," Taylor admitted, "But it's nothing out of the ordinary. He just did stuff every normal guy would do."
"So I'm not normal?" I crossed my arms even though he couldn't see me. I wasn't really angry, but what Taylor said ticked me off just a little.
"Fuck, that's not what I meant. I meant like, you know, guys who-,"
"Taylor," I stopped him and chuckled, "It's alright. I know what you meant."
There was a pause before I heard him chuckle, "You're an ass."
"I think Heath's rubbing off on me," I sighed.
"Okay, that's it," Heath leaned forward and pulled the headset off my head and I leaned my head back to I could see him put it on, "You guys are done harassing Porter."
He paused to listen before chuckling and glancing at me, nodding his head back as a sign for me to sit next to him, so I did. When I was comfortable on the couch, about half a foot of space between Heath and me, we started to fall into a comfortable silence that was occasionally broken by Heath making comments to the guys.
At about 12:30 Heath said his goodbyes and shut off the game, giving me his full attention.
"So, what do you wanna do?"
My head fell back onto the couch and I shrugged. Heath made a contemplative noise and stood up so he could walk over to the movie cabinet.
"Horror, comedy, romance, or action?" He turned around and raised his eyebrow at me.
"Comedy, I guess,"
Heath faced the movie cabinet again and began looking through the different titles. I slouched into the couch and stretched my legs out, digging my heels into the carpet.
He ended up choosing that movie with Russell Brand, where he's a famous singer or something, and I stopped paying attention about ten minutes in. Instead, I messed around on my phone and played with a few apps until the movie ended. I chose the next movie, not willing to sit through another one of Heath's poor choices, and by the end of the movie I was stretched across the couch with my head against the arm rest and my legs over Heath's lap. Heath switched off the DVD player and flipped through different channels until he decided we should watch the last half of Insidious.
Ms. Wage came home a little after 6 and we sat with the TV off as she bustled around the house. She came downstairs every 5 minutes in a different outfit, asking how she looked. Each time we told her she looked stunning, but she shook her head and ran back up to change. On the 4th outfit Heath pushed my legs off him and stood up so he could approach him mom.
"What about this one? Not too fancy, but classy right?" She turned from side to side and Heath leaned against the back of the couch with his arms crossed.
"Going somewhere tonight?"
Her face flushed a bit and I shot up, smiling, "You have a date! Oh my god, are you going on a date?!"
She looked away with a smile and nodded, "He's a client that I've been working with for a while and he asked me out to dinner. I'm so nervous though! I've never gone on a date with a client!"
Pushing himself off the couch, Heath stepped over to his mom and embraced her in a hug, "Ma, you look great. Stop worrying so much."
"Oh, you," She pulled away and pressed a kiss to his cheek, having to stand on her toes a bit so she could reach. She then took a step back and put her hands on her hips, "He'll be here soon. I don't want any girls coming over," She looked at Heath, and then to me, "or guys. Don't set the house on fire, and don't break anything. I'll probably be home around 8 – 9 if the date goes really well."
"We'll be fine," Heath chuckled and Ms. Wage put a hand on his cheek and smiled.
She jumped when the doorbell rang and cursed silently, "I still need to pick out shoes! Heath, be a good boy and open the door. Don't be rude."
I looked at Heath as he went to answer the door, his mom quickly hopping up the stairs. A sigh escaped my mouth and I rolled off the couch onto the floor, picking myself up only to walk behind the couch and lean against it like Heath had been doing a few moments ago. When Heath walked back into the room not a minute later there was a very handsome middle aged man walking behind him and I applauded Ms. Wage in my head. Nice catch.
Heath is way cuter though. God, I'm surrounded by attractive people. What do I do?
"So, you must be Heath, Kate's son," The man stuck his hand out and Heath shook it, a bored look on his face.
"Yeah, nice to meet you. This is my friend Porter," He took his hand away from the man and pointed at me, shoving his hand in his pocket after. I wasn't sure if the look in his eyes had changed to a mischievous one, but I wouldn't be surprised.
"Hello, Porter," the man smiled at me and we shook hands as I awkwardly mumbled out a hello. I'm no good around gorgeous people that I don't know.
"My mom's still getting ready but she should be done soon," Heath informed and moved to stand next to me. I nudged him with my shoulder and grinned as he nudged me back, a smile playing on his lips.
Oh, I see where this is going.
When Heath was 5 years old his parents got a divorce, and his dad left. I think he moved to Europe but we aren't really sure. After Heath turned 13 his mom started dating and at first Heath was opposed to the idea, so he would call me over before the date came to pick his mom up and we'd… well we'd try to make him leave before the date started. The first time we pretended that I was mute and Heath was blind – that was fun. About two years ago though, we stopped trying to sabotage the date and just started testing them, seeing if they were good enough for Ms. Wage. My favorite was the time when we told the guy that I was Heath. Heath walked around behind me and whatnot and I pretended not to see him. Ms. Wage's date thought he was seeing a ghost.
"So, do you boys go to school together?" Ah, small talk. This stuff was always awkward.
"Yeah," Heath replied, not giving the guy much to respond with, and slung and arm over my shoulder. I instinctively huddled into Heath's side and cursed myself for it. Oh well, at least I'm playing my part.
The man shoved his hands in his pockets and breathed out awkwardly, looking around the room and bobbing his head to a silent beat.
"Um, I didn't catch your name?" I offered and he stopped fidgeting to apologize.
"Forgive me," He chuckled, "I'm Colin Wood. I can't believe I forgot to give you my name!" He lightly slapped his forehead and grinned. What a doof. No wonder Heath's mom likes him.
"It happens," I smiled back and then looked up at Heath again. He returned my look and I was instantly drawn into his stupid light brown eyes and watched as they sparkled with amusement and something else. I pressed my lips together in a pout, thinking about how unfair it was that he was so close and I couldn't have him.
"Done staring yet, babe?"
My face flushed and I looked down, jabbing Heath in the stomach with my elbow, and turning my back towards him, "You're a butthole."
"Aw, don't be like that," He wrapped his arms around my waist and put his chin on my shoulder.
I tried my best to ignore his chest that was pressed against my back and I glanced over at Colin, who was looking away from us. He looked incredibly awkward, but not in the 'oh my god, they're gay what do I do' kind of way but in the 'well I feel like I'm ruining a moment' kind of way, if that makes sense. This made me feel a little bad for the guy.
"Um Colin," I took Heath's arms off my waist and Colin gave me his full attention, "Do you want me to see if Ms. Wage is done yet?"
"No need!" We all turned to the stairs to see Heath's mom skipping down the steps, "Sorry for the wait," She apologized and grinned at Colin.
"It's alright. Heath and his friend made for good conversation," Colin and Ms. Wage both shot us smiles and I felt even worse about making Colin feel out of place.
We watched from the door as Colin opened the passenger door for Ms. Wage and I didn't move until they had driven out of sight. I stepped back so Heath could close the door and I crossed my arms, "He seems like a nice guy."
Heath trudged back over to the couch and sat on the armrest.
"Something wrong?" I asked, slowly walking to stand in front of him.
He shrugged and looked at the floor by my feet.
"Is it about Colin?"
He shook his head and I huffed.
"Heath, he's probably a good guy and your mom really deserves-,"
"Porter, it's not about Colin. I really don't care," He snapped.
"…oh," I shifted my weight from side to side and bit my lip. Was it something I said?
I watched as Heath fiddled around with his hands and let out angry puffs of air. He then looked up at me for a second before sighing and falling backwards onto the couch.
Of course Heath would change the subject to avoid talking about his feelings – but I let him. Forcing someone to talk about stuff never really ended well, I guess.
"I think there's pizza still in the freezer. Want me to go make it?"
"Yes please," He grumbled and I slinked off into the kitchen, giving Heath some alone time.
It wasn't long until I heard Heath turn on his game system to play whatever video game he had been playing when I woke up. I don't think he was playing with the guys though, since Heath himself was pretty silent. As I waited for the oven to heat up I grabbed a tray to put the pizza on. When the oven was fully heated I slid the pizza inside and set the timer for ten minutes. While the pizza slowly cooked in the oven I stayed in the kitchen, looking through the pantry and all the different cupboards as I hummed Jeff Buckley songs to myself. Soon I got bored of snooping around in the kitchen and peeked into the living room to see what Heath was doing. Turns out he was playing a completely different game from this morning; this game had zombies running around.
Okay, so I pretty much lied when I said I didn't think video games were fun. Sure, some games I found stupid and didn't see the point of, but honestly? I'm absolutely horrible at video games. Sure I've helped Mindy out with her Animal Crossing game, but that's because she's my little sister and that game's not too hard to figure out. Sandra tried to get me into Kingdom Hearts but each place took me forever and when I got to the Alice in Wonderland stage I nearly broke the controller in frustration.
Don't get me started on Mario Kart.
Hearing the oven ding brought me back to earth and I slid on a pair of oven mitts before pulling the pizza out of the oven. I placed it on the counter to cool off and removed the mitts from my hands, putting them back in the drawer where they belong.
"Hey Heath," I hollered, "What do you want to drink?"
It took him a second to reply, "I think there's some juice in the fridge."
Just like he said, there was a carton of apple juice on the top shelf and I pulled it out, setting it on the counter next to the tray of pizza. I then opened the cabinet in front of me and reached up to search for two cups, finding glasses instead of plastic ones. They were probably in the dishwasher or something, and I'd rather use plastic cups than glass ones. I huffed and removed my hand from inside the cabinet, letting my arm relax and fall onto the counter. Before I was able to check the dishwasher I felt my arm tense and I quickly sucked in a breath of air, pulling my arm back to cradle it against my chest. I soon found myself sitting on the floor, hissing silently. Wow, I'm such a dumbass.
I pulled my arm away from my chest to inspect the damage and winced as I saw an angry burn in the middle of my forearm, stretching across the width.
"Damn it," I muttered, "That's gonna scar."
Frowning, I stood up and went to the sink to run water over the burn. The feeling of cold water against my arm stung but was also relieving, so I kept my arm under the faucet for another minute or so until remembered that Heath was waiting for me to bring out the pizza and drinks. Being as cautious as possible, I cut up the pizza and put it on a large plate. I found plastic cups in the dishwasher, already clean, and filled two with apple juice. By the time I entered the living room with the food I felt too worn out to eat but I put everything on the small table that Heath had moved in front of us and grabbed a small slice anyways.
It wasn't long until there was one slice left, Heath being the one who ate most of the pizza. I mindlessly reached out to grab the last slice, eyes glued to the video game that Heath had been kicking butt at. When my hand hit another hand I jumped and looked to see Heath reaching for the last piece as well.
"Oh sorry bro," He apologized and pulled his hand back, "Last slice is all yours."
"Are you sure?"
"Totally, I mean you only had like 2 slices so it's only fair,"
"If you say so," I picked up the slice and took a bite, "If you want some though just let me know. I don't mind sharing."
He glanced over at me and smiled, "Porter seriously, you can have – wait, what happened to your arm?"
"What? Oh," I looked down at my right arm which held the slice of pizza and shrugged, "I burned it in the pizza tray. No biggie."
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah. I ran some cold water over it afterwards,"
His eyebrows crossed and he frowned, "Does it hurt?"
"Well yeah," I chuckled, "It's a burn. I'll put some Neosporin or something on it later, I dunno."
"Why didn't you tell me?" By now he had the game paused and was looking at me with a worried expression. I frowned and lowered my hand that had the pizza in it.
"Um wow, I just didn't think it was a big deal. It's not like I burned my entire arm off," I raised an eyebrow. What in the world was going through his head right now?
"Yeah but," He faltered for a second, "Maybe I could've helped or something?"
I groaned loudly and put the slice of pizza back on the plate, "Heath, stop freaking out about it."
"I'm not freaking out," He growled, "I just-,"
Shifting myself so I was closer to him, I lifted myself onto his lap and put my hands against his cheeks, "Stop it."
"Stopit," I squished his face and pursed my lips, "No, bad Heath."
He was silent, simply returning my stare and as I became more satisfied with his silence I released his face and hopped off of his lap. The silence stayed as I reclaimed my seat next to him and reached out to grab the pizza again. Before I could get it, though, Heath had dug his fingers into my side and started tickling me.
"Heath stop! Oh my god I swear if you don't stop right now I will kick you where it hurts!"
I was slowly falling sideways onto the couch as I tried to remove Heath's hands, and I was actually ready to kick him. His hand managed to creep under my shirt and make contact with my skin, which made me yelp as I turned away and half fell off the couch, my head and back on the floor while was rest of me was slowly sliding off the couch. Heath then grabbed my feet and before he could start tickling me again I put my hands up in surrender.
"Spare me! Oh my goodness, I can't take anymore!" I sighed in relief when he released my feet and took a deep breath to relax myself. I laid on the floor for a few seconds before picking myself up and righting myself on the couch.
"The universe is right again," Heath informed, picking his game controller back up.
"Yeah, well if you do that again the universe is going up your ass."
Wow sorry for the long wait
If you guys review I'd be more motivated to write and post stuff but w/e
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