The "worst event" happened at a party a twelfth grader from our school had a few months ago. Janie and I went, because even though we were two grades below, we knew a few other kids from our grade were going too. It was a big stone house, with bushes in front, and cars were parked in the street. We were not even at the front door when we heard the music and laughter.

Since we were only fifteen, we couldn't drive, so we told our parents we were going to a party from a friend and we were walking together to it.

All around us in the living room, girls and boys, most in twelfth grade, were talking and dancing, while pop music was playing loudly from the speakers. There were tables laid out with snacks and drinks, including two punch bowls.

This is when the "worst event" started.

"Do you want some punch?" Janie asked. "Sure," I replied. We were at a party with older kids. What were we supposed to do? Janie went over to the table while I chose a spot near the wall for us to stand. Janie handed me a paper cup with red punch and we both drank. All we did was talk, eat a few cookies, and drink punch.

I have no idea how many cups we had, but it was a lot for us to act differently. I felt tired but energetic at the same time, and Janie looked the same. We continued to laugh and talk, though our voices sounded weird. We continued to feel drowsy. I have never felt this way before, and that was when I had a scary thought.

"Janie...do you think those drinks have alcohol in them?" I asked. "If they did, we would have tasted it," she said, but she looked a bit worried. "What about drugged?" I asked.

I watched her think about that for a while. "We should probably go home," she said, looking up at me seriously. "Yeah," and we began to head for the door but then I felt so dizzy. "Wait," I said, my voice slurred, "I want to rest first." I don't know if she heard me, but she said, "I forgot how to get home. Let's rest in a bedroom."

I looked to see if any of the couches were available but they were all occupied so we walked slowly up the stairs. We weren't thinking about anyone being up there, or anyone sleeping in the beds. We weren't thinking this was anyone's house or about getting in trouble or being late getting home. We weren't thinking we couldn't rest in a stranger's bed and rest next to each other. We weren't thinking at all.

"So what did you think of the party?" Janie said, laying down, facing me on the big bed we climbed on. "It was cool." I grinned at her, and I felt really happy. All talk of leaving and drugs were forgotten in seconds, and we stared at each other as if we were the last episode of our favorite TV show.

The bed felt soft under my body, and my head felt it was made for the pillow. We still had our shoes on and we were lying on top of the covers. Me being drunk or drugged or whatever, I moved towards Janie and put my arm around her, and she moved closer to me. Our faces were close to each other.

I suddenly felt really good, that I felt I could do anything.

That is when the "worst event" happened.

I didn't have memory of this after I woke up, but I had leaned in slowly and gently I had kissed her on the lips. All I was thinking was how beautiful she looked. If I could, I would tell her she's the most beautiful girl in the world, but I can't do that because I am scared she would leave me. We were friends since eighth grade, and we are both girls. Janie is only interested in boys, but for me, I have no idea if I'm gay or bi, because I have an attraction to her.

Janie didn't get away from me when I kissed her, but instead just laid there looking a bit confused, the only real expression during that time. She only stayed there because she wasn't in her normal state, but I only kissed her because of that same reason.

I kissed her again slowly. Her lips were soft. "I love you," I said. Those were the words I had wanted to say to her so badly, and now it happened. She just continued to stare at me. I don't know what she was thinking of or if she remembered what I said, but I hoped she remembered, because I meant those words, and I still do.

The next thing we remember, we wake up, still in the bed. I am groggy, then I see the light from the window, feel the covers on top of me, my feet feeling no shoes, and I come to my senses.

I am lying naked in bed. I turn towards Janie in confusion and her eyes are slightly open facing the ceiling, and she is naked too. I see my clothes on my floor. After long minutes lying there, we slowly put on our clothes, and without saying anything, our eyes look into each other, blue against gray-blue, and they say, "What just happened?"

We walk out the door not together, and walk to our houses.

That was the "worst event".