Hey there

Hey there! It’s me. I haven’t written in a while. Just so you know.

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All I see is darkness now. At least, that’s what I think is it. Is there really such a thing as darkness anymore? Just, absence and presence of all color and past images keep rolling in to one bottomless pit, falling. I’m always falling. It never stops, endless, hopeless, endless and hopeless.

            I recall my mother grasping me tightly, as if she would lose me forever if she let go. I heard her whimpering, crying, and telling me in panicked short phrases that everything would be ok, over and over again. I believe it was more for her own comfort than mine at the time. Looking up at Mama’s tear-streaked face, I then realized what we were doing here, in our basement, our small house in Kansas.

            The wind outside was howling so loud that I felt my ears would start to bleed. The screeching of the tree branches against the windows upstairs was beginning to be unbearable, a low humming following in hot pursuit of the rapid beatings of shutters against the house.

            I began to grow scared.

            “Mama?” I whined, and the tears finally begin to reach me, as well. She looked down at me again, cradling me in her arms and rocking back and forth soothingly.

            “It’s ok, honey, I love you, k?” She choked on her last words, another bout of tears welling up. I nod, and tell her I love her too.

            “Why are you scared, Mama?” I yell as the ceiling begins to cave in. I watch, stunned, for a split second as half of the house is ripped away from us, and we followed it. I feel a sensation of weightlessness, being blown about as a feather in a light breeze. Then I am dropped. The calming feeling of flying is knocked away from me as my stomach does cartwheels inside of me.

            Then nothing. I don’t even remember if I was conscious or not at the time. The feeling of awake, or of feeling at all, had escaped me. As if I had forgotten, I suppose.

            All I know from that terrifying incident is that I never saw light again. As the debris from the tornado reached Mama, and me the window imploded on to my face, leaving me with empty sockets where my eyes used to be, and patched of scars all over the front of me. Like little speckles of snow all over the dark skin that I know myself to have.

            The color of my skin is what brings me to the position I am currently in. At least, that’s what my brother tells me. I wouldn’t trust anyone else’s voice. It’s been so long, after all. What would I know from green and red, purple and yellow, or black and white? I can’t recall what those words mean.

            And yet, here I am, walking next to my brother, in this situation that almost all blacks in this time fear. My brother is explaining to me what is going on as it happens, I hear him say a number of different colors, and I try to ignore them.

            “There are five men in white hoods and robes around us. I don’t know where we’re going but it doesn’t look good.” I nod in understanding, calmly. But my fear is growing and I feel my throat choke up. I’m going to cry, and no tears will come out. I hope they’re disgusted.

            I begin to grope around myself, but the feeling of falling takes over me again, just as I grasp the stiff, flowing cloth of a robe. I hear the yelling of several racial slurs/obscenities right before I am hit in the head with something large and heavy, and unconscious before my head hits the ground.

            I’m in for a surprise when I wake. Fire. I feel nothing but searing heat. My flesh, crisping and falling off, I’m in agony, oh God, such agony. The fading pictures of my half-forgotten childhood flash on my mind, merely ghosts of what they were before. Where did I go? What happened to my brother?

            I scream reaching for cool air, trying to find so desperately that I know I would find, if only I could see! Don’t let the darkness eat me, I’m already half way gone.

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Alright, please tell me what you think. Tell me if I need to work on the ending or not… I personally think the ending needs a something more… *shrug* Eh… Quick! Review and tell me before my teacher grades it!

-QueSeraSera