This is a short (very short) little one-shot fic written in the point of view of an everyday jock. I tried to take a dive into his mind. This is not for the teenyboppers of the world.

Sometimes, I ask myself why. Why do I continuously put myself through this? The answer is simple: people expect me to. All the girls, and even a few boys, want me to be perfect, strong, everything. I am their dream. They swoon over me with high hopes that I will take note of their pathetic lives, and I do… but not in the way most desirable to them.

You’ve got it. My name is Guy Kalavier though most call me Kev. I am what the "outsiders" would call a ‘prep’; a genuine high school jock.

But I’m not so genuine.

They think they know the real me. How could they? I put on my show, my daily façade in order to please them; those ditzy, dyed-blonde girls always giggling at me; the shy-faced few boys who live in fear of being found out, giving me faint glances. I try to live with it all.

But perhaps, that is not the only reason I subject myself to all the internal pain. Somewhere deep down, maybe I long for it; the attention. My whole childhood, I was overlooked. Think as you may, but I was once your classic ‘nerd.’

But all that changed soon enough. Sports began to blossom in the minds of my friends, and I found them attracted to self-defiling sports like football. At first, I adamantly set my mind against it, but the constant pushing and pulling; the tempting yet offhand comments…

I broke. I became what I had always despised and somehow, a little piece of my very spirit was satisfied because now I was known. No longer was I just another mindless drone meandering through life with no purpose. I had an identity in the screwed society I live in. The price seemed worth it and still does at times, if I reach far enough back into my mind.

They smile at me, try to be my friend; only for a tiny piece of glory all for their own. Ignorance is bliss, I have heard.

I wish I was ignorant; unseeing, unknowing… not capable of perceiving the reality of things around you. Yes, that would truly be euphoria of its own accord. It is a blessing so denied to me and I find myself filled with utter contempt.

Towards who? Myself, all the people about me, the world.

But I cannot simply place the blame on them. I chose to become the being I am today, and I will live it out to the end: deceiving, conniving, lying. My face is my own no longer. I only pray that there are no others who live a life such as mine.

Maybe, just maybe, they shall remain ignorant to the world around them.