Bi-Trendy Wiccan Song

No, this isn't actually supposed to be good.  I just wrote it to make fun of some of the fake depressed people I know.  It does sort of work better with music than it looks like it does, but it's still crap… That's sort of the point, though.  You can insult me as much as you want for the stupidity of this, I definitely deserve it.

(Very mournful and dramatic)

I'm so alone

No one understands

I'm waiting for my mom

To pick me up in her minivan

I'll go with all my friends

And we'll see our favourite band

I relate to their lyrics

Because no one understands

(Faster, more upbeat)

Yeah, I'm a bi-trendy Wiccan from the Suburbs

Cause I think I look good in black

My hair is a funny colour

So you better watch your back

My parents are abusive

Yeah, they like to yell at me

They think that I'm a failure

And no one sees the real me

A born pessim-est!

Just like all the rest!

I'm an individual cause I dress like all my friends!

I'm a bi-trendy Wiccan from the suburbs

And one day I'll pierce my nose

I've suffered too much ear damage

To hear that Kittie blows

I have emotional problems

And lots of secret pain

I cry when I need attention

Don't be mean cause I'm insane

Yeah, and I like Tool!

Cause they are so cool!

And I think it's subversive to wear fishnets on my arms!

I'm a bi-trendy Wiccan from the suburbs

One day I'll be a rock star

Then everyone will love me

Cause my lyrics will be so dark

Yeah, I'm a bi-trendy Wiccan from the suburbs

A bi-trendy Wiccan from the suburbs

A bi-trendy Wiccan from the suburbs…