WHEN EVERYTHING SEEMS PERFECT

I left what seemed right. I left the only home my children knew. I left the one man who loved me more than I loved my self. It was the place I could never stay.

By this time, my kids, Eileen and Eric were 10 and 4, too young to lose in many ways, but I was too old to continue. My husband of far too many years, Aaron was what kept me some what stable through it all.

From the surface of it all…everything seemed perfect, but only I saw what was underneath. I always knew there was something not quite right inside of me, causing me to act the way I did. My doctor gave me medication that sometimes helped, but I was always hiding the pills from Aaron, so I always forgot where I hid them that week. I wanted my husband to know he married the perfect woman, and has two perfect children, the pills helped me wear that smile everyday.

I was a stay at home mom, I loved my kids, don’t get me wrong…they were my life, my joy…but there was always something inside me tearing me away from that life I longed for. Doctors always asked me about my childhood, my marriage, my kids, my parents, my family…I made it all seem perfect. Ever since I was a little girl if anyone asked me “How are youâ€