Chapter Thirteen: Shades of Gold and Gray

It was autumn that day, a cool breeze softly swept by, the sun occasionally poked through the gray clouds. It was just another day to me. It was just another day to anyone I suppose. It was a Saturday, so Romy wanted to go outside and play, knowing that my Saturdays were always open to her. I didn't have any objections to that, and I couldn't help but smile as I zipped up her coat.

Things were bright again. It was nice to not have to worry about money then; knowing that Craig was able to handle everything for me. It's not that I solely depended on him, I worked myself, but he was there for the support I needed. I left a note on the table that said Romy and I had gone to the park, and we left.

This particular playground was only about three blocks away and as long as the weather permitted, we walked. Though we lived in the city, the park was a great escape from the tall buildings and busy streets. I enjoyed my time there as well, a good place to read a book on the park bench and just relax. Romy always entertained herself at the park, but I was there to push her on the swing whenever she decided to go to the swing set. It was a quiet place too, not very many children were ever there, but I suppose that it was nice that way. You could still hear the cars and trucks drive by on the street, but it didn't hinder you from your peace at the park.

It wasn't cold outside, but enough for me to require a hot cup of coffee. I sat myself down on the bench near the playground, with my book and coffee, and Romy went off. I always looked up after every paragraph or so, paranoid that something might happen to her, but she was always laughing while she played, and there was another little girl there that day, so I was more at ease. I was about in the middle of my romance novel. I loved my romance novels, because everything always ended happy. Maybe the damsel in distress didn't get her prince charming, but she always got the man that she deserved. I hoped that my life would reflect the same.

I had had a horrible headache the night before. It kept me up all night, so I was grateful for my caffeine boost. The Tylenol didn't even seem to stop my headache and every time Craig stirred in bed, pain cascaded ten- fold. It was like a migraine to me, but it was more at the base of my head, around my neck. It went away early morning however, so I wasn't without sleep the entire night. I was getting a cold, I knew I was getting a cold, so I knew Romy was going to get a cold too. That was just the way it was, whatever I got, she did too, whatever she got, I got too.

After about a half-hour or so, I wasn't even reading my book. Staring off into the trees in the distance, I was thinking about what was to be that night. Craig and I were going out to dinner, Romy was going to stay with a sitter, and I was excited. I loved spending time alone with Craig, just as much as I enjoyed being with both of them, especially together. Romy had taken such a liking to Craig after the first couple of days that I knew things were going to work out. It was such a relief for me because I was scared that Romy wouldn't even give Craig a chance, but she did, and she loved him.

This was meant to be. Craig and I were meant to be together, that much I was sure of, it just took a while for things to get settled. I was always warm inside when I saw them together. Craig started off a bit rough, not really knowing how to act around her, how to speak to her, but everything smoothed out after a week or so. She even started calling him 'daddy'. That was the best reward of all, telling me that she had accepted him. Craig didn't try to convince her of anything different, willing to take on that role to her.

"Hey." Speak of the devil. I smiled to myself as Craig sat down next to me, knowing that I was just thinking about how much I wanted him to be there next to me.

"Hey," I smiled to him. He leaned in and gave me a soft kiss on the lips before he leaned back on the bench.

"Been here long?"

"Almost an hour," I answered, seeing Romy sitting on part of the playground equipment with that other girl. They were both talking and laughing, and I wondered what they were doing. I always wondered what my daughter was thinking when she was a baby and couldn't verbally communicate, even then I was still curious. "I didn't expect you to be here so soon." Craig had been working. He worked one Saturday extra of each month, usually for about half the day.

"I got off early," he said, obviously I knew that much, but it didn't really matter. I set my book down in my lap and rested my head on Craig's shoulder. I could feel my headache coming back with a vengeance. I closed my eyes as the sudden pain shot up the base of my head to the brow of my eyes. It was almost unbearable for a second or two.

"Are you all right?" He asked me suddenly. I opened my eyes, realizing that I had been gripping his hand tightly as the pain arose in my head.

"Yeah," I answered softly, "just a headache." I sat up then, not wanting him to start worrying over me, though something told me he should have been worried and me more cautious. I saw Romy go down the slide, and the girl soon followed her down, I didn't want to make her leave already. "I think I'm going to go home. Will you stay here with Romy?"

"Sure," Craig shrugged. "Are you gonna be okay?" I just smiled softly, glad that he was worried about me, but thinking inside that it was nothing. Everyone gets a headache, a bad one every now and then; I was no different from the next girl. I stood up and Craig stood up with me. He had turned into more of a gentleman too, the years that we spent apart, and I smiled every time he opened the car door for me, or pulled out my seat when we went out to dinner.

"I'm going to be fine," I insisted, sounding mildly exasperated as I kissed him lightly. His arm rubbed my back and I grabbed my book and my coffee, and headed home. The sound of the cars driving by and people brushing past me irritated my headache even more, and my vision started to blur. I didn't even notice it at first, until I started to cross the street and cars came barreling towards me.

The sound of tires skidding on the pavement startled me and I stopped dead in my tracks as the car came to a halt, inches away from me. "Watch where yer walking, lady!" the man inside the car yelled to me, but it was like gibberish, in one ear and out the other. I looked at him as I stumbled across the street, making it safely to the other side when I suddenly felt like I was going to vomit. My home was only a block away, so I tried to keep the bile inside me until I could make it at least to my own yard.

I let out the contents of my stomach on my front porch, which didn't consist of much besides the coffee I had had a little while before. The nausea quickly left me and my vision started to clear after I had vomited, but my headache wasn't about to go away. I struggled with the keys and the lock on the door, unable to find the proper key the first couple times I tried, but the door finally opened and I stumbled inside.

Another wave of nausea came to me but I had made it to the bathroom in time and kneeled over the toilet, dry heaving. It didn't last very long, something I was grateful for, so I went to my bedroom. I just needed to lie down for a little bit, so I pulled down the shades, gathered the curtains together until my room was dim. I shut the door and took off my coat, stumbling as I tried to kick off my shoes. I lay down on the sheets of the bed, feeling my body relax once it was horizontal, but my headache was still going strong. I closed my eyes, and decided to go to sleep, with every intention of waking up.

My eyes were never to be opened again.

That day, around noon I suppose, I died of a brain aneurysm. Never did it cross my mind as I displayed all the symptoms that day, but it mildly reminded me of a hangover. I never had any clue that I needed to go to the hospital, but I probably would have refused to go anyway.

Craig and Romy returned home that day around one o'clock after they went to lunch, me already dead in my bedroom. They had no idea. Craig had walked into our room to tell me that he had returned but I didn't hear him. I remained that way the rest of the afternoon and Craig didn't come to me again until it was time for our dinner. He had already dropped Romy off at the baby-sitter, and he sat down on the edge of the bed and tried to awaken me.

I was already cold like death and he knew something was wrong when he touched my head. He called 911 and an ambulance came within minutes, but it was too late. He had cried that day, repeating over and over again that I had been just fine that morning. The paramedics tried to calm him down, but it didn't work. Craig was always so strong, and I never thought he would cry, ever.

Romy was too little to understand the concept of death. She didn't realize that, when Craig told her that her mother had died, I would never be coming back. For almost a week after I had passed, she would ask him when I was coming home. It hurt him every time, but he stayed strong, for her. He would only smile, and tell her that I was never coming back, but that I was always watching over her, and that I would always be there for her when she needed me.

My parents came down for my funeral, my friends came down as well, some people I hadn't seen in years were there. Sometimes, I used to wonder about whom would be at my funeral and if those people would cry. Craig stayed strong that day with all the people around him but when he was alone, he broke down. I wanted to be there for him, but he was just so far away.

I'm not sure why I could call that day the happiest day of my life, but everything felt so right that day. I had gone to the doctor's that morning and found out, for sure that I was pregnant. I was so excited, as I'm sure you can imagine, because I knew Craig wasn't going to leave me. He was ready for another child and I knew I was too. Finally, he and I were bonded together, and I thought that nothing would break us apart.

The weather seemed perfect that day. Autumn was always my favorite season and the leaves on the trees were the perfect shades of gold and red and orange. The sky was a light gray, but orange and yellow from where the sun was. The breeze was so calming, not too cold, but perfect for the degree outside. Despite my headache, I felt great. I was going to tell Craig about the new baby at dinner, and I knew that everything would go smoothly, I pictured it in my mind. I suppose, you can't always get your way, things come up and plans are changed. It wasn't that I had to accept my fate, but that the people I impacted over the years had to accept my fate. I never meant to make them cry.

A/N: I want to thank all of you who have reviewed. Never would I have been able to finish this story without you. I'm sorry if some of you are disappointed with the ending, but I'm satisfied with it. The whole goal was for her to get back with Craig, but I guess I didn't display that very well ^_^;; Oh well. Thank you all very, very much for reading and I hope that you'll review more of my work in the future. (***Check out my new story, Vogue, while you're here*** ^_^ It's about a young girl, trying desperately to be considered beautiful, thinking all of that will be accomplished once she becomes a model. She'll go through many outer struggles, with friends, family, and inner struggles with herself and her eating disorder. It should be good, especially if I have your support!)

Thank you to: Opinionated, Harmonized, Lil Critter, Twisted Rose, Tracie, NehemiaH, Trinity Marquise, beni, Jen Drake, qtpiez, Blaze555, Magikal Poetress, Lisa M., Freakage, Taiyl, TheLadyLoco, The Marauder's Map, Neophrite, Je Suis Tortue, Soleil Antionette, Jenna Ballinger, sapofbks2002, Jess, NicoleClaire, Roxygirl454, and Jasmyne.