##Defense##

I hate feeling vulnerable

Every flirtatious remark you say makes me bristle

Your sweet nothings drive me crazy

Hammer at my weak spot, the chink in my self-built armor

When I scoff and insult you for your efforts

You can see my heart's not in it

My eyes are my soul's windows

The fear there is very real, if you look for it

My anger is tangible too, I know you've felt it

So resistant am I to things others recoil from

Death, I shed no tear

Pain, I sit and endure

Tragedy, I'll keep moving

But if Cupid's wings brush by me I stagger

I run rather than fight

I feel trapped, I don't know what to do

Desperate and afraid, I lash out

Hoping anger will secure me again

I flee, half-wanting you to chase me

And terrified when you do

Because I had to hold my armor somewhere

when I made it

When I took my hand away

the hole was there

centered over my heart, invisible

Every missile I've deflected, laughing

(The fools don't know where to hit, I'm invincible)

But you come and jab me at the spot with bare fingers

Bare words

I don't know what to believe

I don't know what to do

where to go

who to trust

I crumple under the weight of independence

Your arms around my shining metal body

the plates and chains slipping off

Are you holding on to capture me

or comfort me?

Why push me down to pick me up?

My heart aches, the arrow driven home

Cupid was never so cruel

to lend you his golden bow and arrows

though your hand drew them

I don't know whether to promise revenge,

never forget my aching wound

or forgive . . . . . even thank?

That Love can be this painful and this

Blissful-------------good shot