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OldJoe
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email: Email
since: 01-24-04, id: 394475
Author has written 29 stories for Supernatural, Humor, Spiritual, Fantasy, Life, Love, General, Humor, Sci-Fi, Essay, and General.
When telling a non-fiction story, I tend to stray from realism, completely warping the story into something not even resembling real. Reality is a bitch, frankly, and so I let my writing pull me away, for I am no pimp.

I'm back, much to the people's dismay. Read the latest chapter of 'Rant' to find my opinion of fictionpress right now.

Damn Good book I just read- "The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys" . And no, it has nothing to do with the priest scandal. Read it, it's awesome. Quote-"He wouldn't be alive right now, even if he hadn't gotten killed when he did. People like that die young. They have an influence on other people that lasts, but they don't."

Sorry about some horribly spelled and punctuated reviews I've given out recently.




1. Chewing Gum reviews
A short collection of mine own poems, derived from a recent poetry orgasm I was so fortunate to undertake.
General - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 193 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 2-21-06 - Published: 2-21-06
2. Bacon vs WafflesThe Ultimate Showdown reviews
Youe saw the title-the chronicles of the battle that will ultimately decide the fate of breakfast foods.
Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 167 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 10-12-05 - Published: 10-12-05
3. WHEN FOOD GOES BAD » reviews
The long awaited finale(or is it) to what is perhaps the greatest piece of humor I have ever written. Skip the third chapted if you must-it was in before I proofread, and is unimportant. But the fourth...what all have been awaiting has come.
Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 667 - Reviews: 25 - Updated: 10-11-05 - Published: 4-9-04
4. Tales of a Disheartened Traveler reviews
A little more subtle humor, I think.
Humor - Fiction Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 380 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 10-10-05 - Published: 10-10-05
5. The Contact » reviews
The captain of a cargo freighter makes first contact with aliens. A man must fight for hs survival.
Sci-Fi - Fiction Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,543 - Reviews: 13 - Updated: 5-20-05 - Published: 5-16-04
6. Love of Dusk » reviews
Mostly my life. I went for a different sort of writing style.
General - Fiction Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 763 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 5-19-05 - Published: 5-19-05
7. Controversial Society Rant » reviews
A nice little opinion/fact thingy that is quite controversial, and reflects upon society today. Its back. With fixed formatting on some chapters, and a new chapter. Thanks to all who reviewed, even if all you did was struggle to insult me.
Humor - Fiction Rated: T - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 7 - Words: 1,800 - Reviews: 45 - Updated: 5-19-05 - Published: 5-9-04
8. Pudgy Thumbs reviews
These are the tales of a sad penguin, the life of a sad penguin, and a detail upon penguin society.(Im trying to bring humor into a more subtle approach in this story. No Randomness or cymbal crash jokes)
Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 254 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 12-17-04 - Published: 12-17-04
9. The Last » reviews
Battle rages on broken and dying world, and Harris J. Slater struggles to survive.
Sci-Fi - Fiction Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 3,631 - Reviews: 25 - Updated: 5-9-04 - Published: 4-13-04
10. Trial of the Damned » reviews
A man who was condemned to hell is sent back to earth for a chance to redeem himself, but when he fails, him and heaven's secretary Rose must run from the agents of heaven and hell...(30 reviews now! Thanks everyone)
Supernatural - Fiction Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Fantasy - Chapters: 7 - Words: 2,627 - Reviews: 32 - Updated: 5-2-04 - Published: 4-27-04
11. Reviews reviews
Just a little blurb on this site about how reviews ar drugs. (please r+r)
General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 45 - Reviews: 13 - Updated: 5-2-04 - Published: 5-2-04
12. When The Monkey Comes For You reviews
A strange poem, to say the least. And it's not even that good.
Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 30 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 5-1-04 - Published: 5-1-04
13. Rachel Carson reviews
An essay I wrote for english about one of the most important, yet forgotten people in Enviromental History. Please read, as we can't forget the wonders she did to preserve mankind and nature alike.
Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,136 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 5-1-04 - Published: 5-1-04
14. Survivor's Game » reviews
A futuristic smuggler works to get the money he is owed.
Sci-Fi - Fiction Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 825 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 4-23-04 - Published: 4-17-04
15. Magical Insight reviews
More ponderings on the meaning of life...
Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 125 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 4-17-04 - Published: 4-17-04
16. Cheese Smells Good reviews
Read the title.
Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 4-10-04 - Published: 4-10-04
17. To Take A Life reviews
Read the title
Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - Tragedy/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 61 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 4-10-04 - Published: 4-10-04
18. Walking In Between reviews
In between light and Dark, this is short and to the point. R/R please.
Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 22 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 4-9-04 - Published: 4-9-04
19. The Wise reviews
.
Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 4-9-04 - Published: 4-9-04
20. The Minds Turmoil reviews
If there's turmoil in your life right now, read this. Whether you like it or not, it will help.
General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 163 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 4-9-04 - Published: 4-9-04
21. Nature's Comfort reviews
To those of you filled with lust and broken hearts, don't forget the beauty of Nature and her ways.
Love - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 20 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 4-9-04 - Published: 4-9-04
22. Fishman of Doom » reviews
Another weird story me and my friends wrote. Please review, or you too will become another person in the mindless rabble of victims...
Humor - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 923 - Reviews: 9 - Updated: 4-7-04 - Published: 1-24-04
23. In the Dark » reviews
When visited by evil, things can change... The story begins to unfold, and Jareth begins his Destiny... (No more 50 word chapters from now on. Thanks for the reviews)
Fantasy - Fiction Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Supernatural - Chapters: 7 - Words: 2,393 - Reviews: 14 - Updated: 4-4-04 - Published: 1-26-04
24. Emptiness reviews
Review this please...
Life - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 42 - Reviews: 9 - Updated: 1-30-04 - Published: 1-30-04
25. MwahHAhaHA reviews
A strange story few are bound to interperet. Canoes and Marshmallow's are fully involved.
Humor - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 241 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 1-28-04 - Published: 1-28-04
26. Words of the Forest reviews
This reflects on my own experiances with the deaths of people I love...
Spiritual - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 541 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 1-25-04 - Published: 1-25-04
27. Walking Down the Street reviews
I encounter slugs, Satan, Jell-O, and others on a trip down the street. Read and Review please
Humor - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 188 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 1-25-04 - Published: 1-25-04
28. Reflections reviews
I reflect on Eskimos, eggplants, obesity, religion, and other things... Yes, I know the flames will come for my soul, but review
Humor - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 366 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 1-24-04 - Published: 1-24-04
29. Endless Dreams reviews
A really strange story me and my friends wrote...(Ben Noonan, Joe Hogle, J.B.) Please read and review, as this is our first online piece
Supernatural - Fiction Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 449 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 1-24-04 - Published: 1-24-04
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