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Midnight Proc
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since: 07-06-04, id: 423492
Author has written 8 stories for General, School, Humor, Work, Nature, and War.

7/3/05: Happy early 4th of July! The message below is still revelant. I still intend to update my work to "reflect my true self," but I honestly don't care right now. I don't have any new stuff as of now, but I'm kind of on a creative fly, so watch out for poetry in the upcoming weeks. I did finally update "In Today's News," so I'm very excited about that. Forewarning: Please don't take me and my writing seriously. I'm just a 17-year-old who's high on the soap floating around in my right eye. *grimaces in pain* I'd flush it out, but where's the fun in that?

2/19/05: No, wait... Isn't today the 20th? *blinks, then shrugs* All of my works are OLD. Some are good, some are plain ol' crap. When I have the time, I'll clean out my account and get some more stuff up. That probably won't be until summer, though, knowing my procrastinating self. Yup. But at least I'm revising my bio! I pretty much wiped out my bio, because it was just nonsensical rambling (fun, but pointless). I did keep a few parts, though, because... I felt like it. I kept my introducing paragraph for obvious reason, but the list of "Ways I'd Rather Not Die," I hung onto it for amusement. You'll soon find out through my works that I have a rather interesting sense of humor. I don't mean to offend anyone. If you are, please take your offense elsewhere.

Moving on!

All righty, then... I am called "Proc", short for "procrastination" (duh). Since "Proc" was already taken, I added "Midnight" to my nickname, since I almost always do my homework way past midnight (just ask my mom). Simply put, I have time management issues.

Time for a list!

WAYS I'D RATHER NOT DIE
1. A horrendous nail clipper incident
2. Jumped on by a whale
3. Catch a pole/javelin/baton with your head while in track and field
4. An overexcited Mickey Mouse on drugs with a sword
5. Go off the cliff when I put the trailer into autodrive to make some coffee and then eaten by the family of a squirrel I picked off the street the day before(Thanks, Nienyalie!)
6. Eaten alive by sea rats
7. Suffocate in a full port-a-potty
8. Intestines burned from the inside while lighting farts on fire
9. Shot by a trigger-happy monkey with a pistol
10. Mistaking rat poison for tic tacs

Ouch.

If you leave a signed review, I will be kind enough to review your works, as well. I think I forgot to review one person, though... if it's you, sorry! I'm still trying to figure out who it was!

Bye, don't die!




1. In Today's News » reviews
This week: Body Found in Freezer
Humor - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,654 - Reviews: 56 - Updated: 7-3-05 - Published: 7-9-04
2. The Battle Goes On reviews
If America was a mother, this might have been one of her poems during the Civil War.
War - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 107 - Reviews: 12 - Updated: 8-1-04 - Published: 8-1-04
3. Anger reviews
A metaphorical poem comparing anger to a thunderstorm.
Nature - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 130 - Reviews: 16 - Updated: 7-24-04 - Published: 7-24-04
4. Job Wanted reviews
Definitely not one of my best works, and the rhyme scheme is really weird, but at least it's a lighthearted poem.
Work - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 367 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 7-17-04 - Published: 7-17-04
5. Shattered Vases, Shattered Dreams reviews
A "for school" poem about abortion written in similes and metaphors. Some sappy stanzas, but if you ignore those, it's not a bad poem.
General - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 239 - Reviews: 11 - Updated: 7-9-04 - Published: 7-9-04
6. The Wedgie King » reviews
Second (and final) chapter's up! Yea! In a nutshell, this short story is about football and wedgies. Wrote it for school - my teacher claimed that she never had a student write about wedgies before.
Humor - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,324 - Reviews: 13 - Updated: 7-9-04 - Published: 7-6-04
7. My Own Castle reviews
Another "for school" poem... I vent my frustrations about homework (eh, I couldn't think of anything else to write for the assignment).
School - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 166 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 7-6-04 - Published: 7-6-04
8. The Game reviews
A "for school" prompt on Mark Twain's "The Farm". The poem is based on a, er, "different" basketball game I played with my sophomore team. Please read and review!
General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 187 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 7-6-04 - Published: 7-6-04
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