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| Jack Lumber |
Author has written 9 stories for Horror, Humor, Fantasy, Humor, General, and General. Occupation: Pirate King Hope you liked the bio, but I have more important matters to discuss. I AM ON A QUEST! That's right, a quest. I am on a quest to be on ONE THOUSAND FAVORITES LISTS!!!!!!!!! So help me out! All you have to do is go to one of my stories. Open the little menu at the bottom. Then hit "Add to Favorite Authors". That's it!! So go do it now!!! Current #: 12 Wow,I suck. Thank you to those who have helped my quest. I shall try to repay you by reviewing your stuff. Stuff about me. Intrests: Sites I visit: Quotes: "We all float down here."-Pennywise from "It" by Steven King "You must wade through the bitter waters in order to reach the sweet." Van Helsing in "Dracula", by Bram Stoker "I'll make him an offer he can't refuse"-Marlon Brando, The Godfather. "I will rule the earth with my iron fist! YOU!! OBEY THE FIST!"-Invader Zim "Oh, look, it's da room where ve melt people, you melt away, ya?" "Sweet Lady Freedom!! Lets make out!!- Strongbad, from Homestarrunner.com "The Lincoln Squirrel, has been assasinated! We'll stick with this story all night if we have to!"-Kent Brockman, The Simpsons. | |||||||||
1. Mr Machine reviewsA poem inspired by 1984 by George Orwell. Not much mention of the book in it, though. In fact, none at all... I'm hungry. Can I offer you a drink? Coffee? Do you want cream and/or suger?General - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 176 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 3-31-05 - Published: 3-31-052. Jack Lumber's A Bucket Full of Awesome! » reviewsWooooah! I've done it now! Who knows what you'll find in here! Hehehe! By not telling you what is in here, you will be automaticly curious, and no matter how hard you try to ignore it, it will eat away at your mind untll you finally can't take it anymoreGeneral - Fiction Rated: K - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,955 - Reviews: 17 - Updated: 2-28-05 - Published: 12-29-043. Run Little Rabit reviewsThe Machine Comes HomeGeneral - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 104 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 2-12-05 - Published: 2-12-054. Commercial Central reviewsA TV network devoted entirely to commercials? Oh the horror! This is a collection of wacky commercials that I decided to put down and make into a story thingy. It's pretty funny. Enjoy!Humor - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,288 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 9-12-04 - Published: 9-12-045. The Bloodthirsty Patriots reviewsA somewhat twisted account of the American Revelution. George Washington beheads people, Pat Henry takes a dump, and perfectly good tea is wasted. EnjoyHumor - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 491 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 9-3-04 - Published: 9-3-046. Tales of Jack formerly Outcast from Hell » reviewsThis is just me trying to write something other than humor. I haven't really been able to write a full story, so ill just post the little sections i do have. Maybe ill combine it all one day. Enjoy. Maybe youll get your own ideas.Fantasy - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,005 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 8-23-04 - Published: 8-6-047. I Can't Think of a Title! » reviewsIf anybody sees this, they're probably on my profile page. This is probably my most well recieved story and is generally considered to be the funniest. Read up and stuff.Horror - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,930 - Reviews: 32 - Updated: 8-16-04 - Published: 7-21-048. Running from the Fuzz! reviewsJack Lumber and his fearsom Pirate crew are being chased by the Fuzz (scum). They have many adventures...um...it's really good...trust me...PLEASE READ IT! WAAAAAA WAAAAAAA Everyone ingores me! Booo Hooo!Humor - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,159 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 7-21-04 - Published: 7-21-049. Harry Potter and the Attack of the Yawners reviewsJack and Nuiroth are out one day minding their own buisiness, when they are suddenly sucked into the world of Harry Potter, much to their anoyance. Things die, reputations are ruined. Sorry if your into animal rights, you have to admit though, it was funHorror - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,591 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 7-21-04 - Published: 7-21-04
