My name, Lauren. My licence? I don't even have a permit yet.

Honstly though, it's a good life in the States, and I choose not to bore you with the details.

Although, I like friends. (Ahem. That means you. Don't be bashful! Send me an e-mail, drop me a line. I'll love you forever. Or... of that freaks you out... We can just be friends.)

Well... there we go. If you decide to mail meh, here's a few topics to tackle in case you're having trouble:

1) Who invented reality TV and why?

2) Best methods for killing people who don't deserve life. (see #1)

3) Crocodiles

4) Things that piss you off

5) Things you think may piss me off

6) Things that piss cocodiles off

Six is enough right? Be imaginative.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

1. Autumn Canibalism

Sometimes I think I would like to nibble on Your ear To see how you taste.

Complete - Love - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 156 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 3-20-08 - Published: 3-20-08

2. I Just Think You've Got A Bug

The world’s gone mad. Plain and simple, we are in hell. A bit melodramatic, perhaps, but it’s true.

Complete - Horror - Fiction Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,412 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 3-20-08 - Published: 3-20-08

3. XXX

The third and best poem I wrote for my English class prompt Addictions.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 79 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 12-17-07 - Published: 12-17-07

4. Generation XXX

The second poem I wrote for my English class prompt Addictions. My topic: porn addiction.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 92 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 12-17-07 - Published: 12-17-07

5. X

The first poem I wrote for my English class prompt Addictions. My topic: porn addiction.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 204 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 12-17-07 - Published: 12-17-07

6. The Polar Bear

When I was little I had a reoccuring nightmare about a polar bear that lived under my bed and wanted to eat me. My homage to childhood fears and the teddies that got me through them.

Complete - Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 124 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 10-8-07 - Published: 10-8-07

7. Candle

My Aunt is a ghost, and a terrible ghost indeed.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,328 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 10-2-07 - Published: 10-2-07

8. Pyotr reviews

It's pronounced Peter.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 402 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 6-4-07 - Published: 6-4-07

9. Of Life And Love reviews

Based loosely on a friend's love life. 'A sea of doubt, crossed...'

General - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 119 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 9-19-04 - Published: 9-19-04