I am Canadian.

On Gnomes
I have dreamed a dream
that was not as it seemed
and yet, the gumdrop homes
and the sugary gnomes
did nothing to dispell the apparation,
that perhaps blocked my view of salvation.

Why create an atrocity against mankind such as that, you may ask? Simply because I could. And after about twenty-seconds of writing, that was what was on the page. Behold the curse of automatic writing!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

1. The Faces You Will Meet or The Wreck on Highway 11 reviews

Inspired in part by a line from the T.S. Elliot poem "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock", and in part from a fatal accident I witnessed a few days ago on a highway.

Complete - Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - Tragedy/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 85 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 5-14-08 - Published: 5-14-08

2. A Collection of Sonnets » reviews

A foray into the world of sonnets. Reviewing this is the same as paying at a toll both. Unless you're in Liberty City, you just do it.

Love - Fiction Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 2 - Words: 210 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 5-13-08 - Published: 5-12-08

3. Standing in the Kitchen, By an Open Meadow

Beer fridge streams and lettuce head shrubs are only a few of the things that have NOTHING to do with this Tanka poem.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 115 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 5-13-08 - Published: 5-13-08

4. The Hours and the Days reviews

Purple pandas prefer prozac popping penguins, a partially par prerequisitve for prestigious polygamists! Note: This has nothing to do with the poem ... or does it? Dun-dun-DUN

Complete - Love - Fiction Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 128 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 5-8-08 - Published: 5-8-08

5. On Learning From a Great Many Follies reviews

On the things that we learn from in life.

Complete - Love - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 86 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 5-7-08 - Published: 5-7-08

6. Un Ange Qui Passé

It's an English poem not French.

Complete - Love - Fiction Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 125 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 4-27-08 - Published: 1-31-08

7. An Elegy for Innocence reviews

General poem. Weird stanzas. Fun. Unrelated: Reviewing is necessary to your health. Stuides have shown that 4 out of 5 people who review this story are less likely spontaneously combust, or otherwise explode. Help yourself.

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 3-4-08 - Published: 3-4-08

8. The Sounds of a Winter's Night reviews

A series of couplets, on the subject of a winter's night. Iambic lines, because I'm cool like that. Fast fact: people who leave a comment on FictionPress stories, regardless of whether or not they're good, are more likely to survive a Zombie Apocalypse.

Complete - Nature - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 94 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 2-28-08 - Published: 2-28-08

9. There is a Time reviews

A collection of poems, starting off with a poem that bears the same name as the title.

General - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 129 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 2-20-08 - Published: 2-20-08

10. Thus Spoke I reviews

The Tonka Truck Terror! No, I'm kidding. It's a Tanka poem.

Complete - Haiku - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 24 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 2-5-08 - Published: 2-5-08

11. Autumn Change reviews

Valuable time is being wasted looking for a meaning that isn't in this summary. Like all things worth knowing, the greatest knowledge lies within.

Complete - Haiku - Fiction Rated: K - English - General/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 2-2-08 - Published: 2-2-08

12. Purple Sheet

Jan 3108

Complete - General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 46 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 2-1-08 - Published: 2-1-08

13. To the Fog, Adieu reviews

Reviews or Comments are highly appreciated. Very. Highly. Appreciated.

Complete - Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - General/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 94 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 1-30-08 - Published: 1-30-08

14. The Broken Window reviews

In the quiet, I hear the reminiscent night in the darkness beyond my broken sill I can hear the windy lips bear their lonely song for the romancing birds and distant dawn ...

Complete - Life - Fiction Rated: K - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 96 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 1-27-08 - Published: 1-27-08

15. Fortinbras's Soliloquy reviews

This is a soliloquy written for Fortinbras, after the final act of Hamlet essentially, a reflection on his charge as Hamlet's heir to the throne. Ye be warned written in pseudoOlde English.

Complete - Play - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 253 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 1-22-08 - Published: 1-22-08

16. Sizzling Bacon Forever reviews

Forever, indeed.

Complete - Haiku - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 1-21-08 - Published: 1-21-08

17. Free Will: Myth, or Reality? reviews

Are you reading this because you want to? Or because you're destined to?

Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,253 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 7-30-06 - Published: 7-30-06

18. An Eerie Light reviews

In the depths of night, when time stands still with fright, comes that bluish glow, like that of some spectral poe, intent of insanity to sew.

General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 440 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 7-16-06 - Published: 7-16-06

19. The Creature Below reviews

Can you guess the identity of the creature below?

General - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 204 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 7-16-06 - Published: 7-16-06

20. My Paris Is Burning reviews

World War II is slowly drawing to a close, as the Reich's enemies rapidly begin their journey to Berlin. But even in such dire straits as these, the City of Lights is alive with romance. And if all goes wrong, they'll still have had their Paris.

Romance - Fiction Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 407 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 7-16-06 - Published: 7-16-06

21. Daddy's a Patriot Today

A poem about a boy, and his father at war. Rating: K+9; may contain themes not appropriate for six-year-old children (i.e. war). (I don't know anymore, though. Hollywood's warped ratings too much. Everything's the same.)

War - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 308 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 7-16-06 - Published: 7-16-06

22. A Letter to a Loved One reviews

This is a letter I originally wrote for my the ex, but I thought I'd just share it, because I really enjoy the idea behind it.

Romance - Fiction Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 145 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 7-16-06 - Published: 7-16-06

23. All's Fair in Love and War' reviews

On this famous quote, which so many people seem to believe something different than I do. Rated T: I made a swear.

Essay - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 409 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 7-15-06 - Published: 7-15-06