Name: Jessy
Age: 18
Hobby: Writing and reading and listening to music. Other than that, I have no life.
Favourite(s): How I Met Your Mother (I have recently become addicted), ice cream with maple syrup (again, recently became addicted).
Dislike(s): Terrible drivers. Seriously.
Obsession(s): Eyes. Yes, you heard me. Eyes. I am OBSESSED with people's eyes.

Updates
Entry: November 10th, 2009

This isn't really an entry on my thoughts. This is an update on my two stories; Amelia and Jane's Heart. Amelia is on hiatus for an undetermined amount of time. I lost the spark for that story. Besides, Jane's Heart is much more important to me. I will get to those reasons in a moment.

Anyway, I don't know when I will start writing for Amelia again. Hell, I don't even know IF I'll be writing for Amelia ever again. I know that a couple of readers will be disappointed. Nevertheless, my life is really busy right now and only one story can be at the forefront of my mind.

Jane's Heart. The reasons as to why this story is so important is because, well, it's events that have happened in my life. This is the only way I can sort out my thoughts and my feelings. So, you cannot say how something is wrong with the story because that's exactly what happened to me. I'm dead serious. The first chapter really happened. But the Prologue hasn't happened. Not yet, at least. So...yeah, this is also extremely personal and, if I update slow, it is because I am trying to figure out which events should be put up and which ones shouldn't be. well, that and my life is busy. I am working 5 days a week, sometimes 10 days in a row. I have gone back for another year of high school and I am trying to find a university. So I have homework and work on top of that. And I am also really sick and I am trying to figure out my love life and if I will ever actually have one. On top of all THAT, I have some personal issues that I need to deal with as well. So life is busy.

Anyway, all of the names have been changed and the school names have been _ District High School, or _ _ Secondary School, or _ Collegiate Institute. Why? Because these are actual places and I don't want someone to be able to pinpoint where I live. The same thing has been done to towns/cities. Except for major cities like Toronto or Ottawa or Kingston. I am extremely paranoid. That, and I'm terrible with coming up with names. As for people names, that should be obvious. Even my name has been changed.

Thought I should update you all. Peace!
J.

My Thoughts
Entry: October 17th, 2009

Love. Such a weird thing. It can be the most wonderful feeling in the world but, in a flash, it can turn pure evil and torture us merciliessly. So why do we fall in love? Why do we put up with the rollercoaster of emotions? Flying high one moment and then sinking too far, your heart learching. Some would say that we fall in love because we have found someone to carry on our genes, someone to help the species survive. Others would say that we fall in love because...that's nature. It's what we do.

So, in saying that. Are there soulmates?

I believe so. I believe it so strongly. You don't just fall for your soulmate because you saw your soulmate. It doesn't work like that. You have to fall in love with him/her just like normal. But once you do fall in love with him/her, then you can't see anyone else that way anymore. You might think that you have a crush on someone else but...when you see him/her, that feeble little thing disappears. Your love for that one person is so strong...

Some might argue that this is your 'First Love'. No. 'First Loves' are completely different. You think that they can reach the stars and pluck one out for you, just for you. You think that they can do anything and that your love will always be strong. They do have a major impact on your life. They were your first love, for crying out loud. I remember my first love. Grade 6. He was absolutely amazing! I thought that he could do anything and we would always be together. But then, just like that, he broke my heart. Broke up with me through a letter and it crushed me. When he handed me that note...I just knew. There was something about the way he gave it to me or the way he looked.

I still see him every now and then. He looks different and he's a part of a band. Whenever I tell people we dated, they always ask, 'Aren't you jealous? You could still be with him and and and...he's in a band! Blah blah blah.' Or, 'OH...EM...GEE! SERIOUSLY!? No...SERIOUSLY!? Well, I bet you feel bad that you aren't dating anymore. I mean, look at him! He's gorgeous and he's in a band...and...SERIOUSLY!?' Hah. I'm happy that we aren't dating. I'm happy that we did but I'm happy that we aren't. I can still see the boy he used to be and he's turned out to be an amazing person but...that pull isn't there. So no, I'm not jealous and I honestly don't care that he's in a band. Seriously.

I have found him. Yes. Him. The man of my dreams. Older than Band Boy, more mature. He knows where he wants to go in life and how he wants to get there. He's funny, sweet, kind, caring, compassionate, gorgeous, and all around amazing. But that doesn't mean that he doesn't have his flaws. He can be annoying as hell at times and, sometimes, he's even inconsiderate. But that's rarely. And that's the difference between 'First Loves' and 'Soulmates'.

With 'First Loves', you don't see their flaws. Like I mentioned before, you think that they can do anything. It dazzles you. But with 'Soulmates'...you see their flaws. Sometimes even before their good qualities. And you love them anyway because you know that that's what makes them...them! And you accept it. And you know that he/she can't reach the stars in the night sky in order to pluck that special star, but you know that they don't have to. You know that they will never have to prove themselves to you because you already know them and you already know that they will make you happy no matter what. But you also know that it MIGHT not last. Something might happen and you guys could break up. And you know it and you accept it, just like everything else.

But those are my thoughts and my opinions. And if people start to PM me and bitch and moan about how I'm WRONG because I'm stating my OPINION, then you seriously have something wrong with you. You can disagree, yes, but you can disagree in a polite way. So no ranting and bitching and complaining. I'm not in the best of moods. Haven't been for four years. But that, my friends, is for my story.

Peace.
J