Hello.

Welcome to the Lythrum Society.

As you can probably guess, my real name isn't Ewen Lythrum (whom I refer to as Ewie). He just happens to be the owner of the Lythrum Society, the Grove, and all the other wonders to be found in my story Painting of a Pomegranate. It isn’t up on the website, and it probably won’t, because I tend to catch this disease where I post a chapter and then lose all drive to write. If it is ever finished, I might then start posting chapters.

Painting of a Pomegranate. I could give you a summary, but they always end up sounding cheesy for some reason. Well, I’ll give you the basics: It’s a modern vampire tale that is tangentially connected to the Hades and Persephone myth. The Lythrum family is under a curse that doubles as an opportunity. It has been said that, if the Lythrums donate a certain number of their male generation to the… preservation of the vampire race, let’s say, then they will be granted new life, immortal life, and their own private grove inside the golden gates of Heaven. When the presence of passionate Ami is forced on him and his household, he learns that perhaps there is a sinister shadow to the prospect of blind faith.

Will our hero be able to vanquish the calculating restrictions of unassuming belief? Or will the world be doomed to a servile fate?! Tune in, dear children.

As for the crackhead manning the keyboard here, I bet you want to know my name (or don’t give a shit. Either works in this case). Well, I’m widely known as “Hey You With The Face”, or simply “Face!” for short.

Dirty jokes aside, I mainly set up this name in order to review stories and maybe even have a chat with some authors (cough: DizzySpotChild). At times you may see a random short story manifest on my name. I would love it if you could give me as much criticism as you can. Even if you open a story of mine and become bored with the first few words, leave me a review saying that it sucked so bad you couldn't even start it.

I have three passions: writing (surprise, right?), anything art related (as in painting, drawing, pen and inking), and reading aloud snippets of erotica in large crowds. The third passion is very amusing, actually, especially if you find yourself next to an old couple. In terms of writing, I find that most of my work deals with the... delicacies of love, as in the various forms and the circumstances that could prove daunting to them. In terms of art, I love the breakdown. I love staring at something, and watching all of the colors pop out and present themselves to my mind. I love taking a human face and reducing it to stained glass-esque lines. My painting style is the love child of Oskar Kokoschka and Emil Nolde. My art style is what I refer to as Impulsion. If an idea strikes my mind, I act on impulse. I let the craziest ideas take in fresh air, and many of them end up as paintings or stories. As for erotica, not only does it make hilarious reading material (honestly, who sits down and thinks to themselves: "I want a book of the most graphic sex stories evah!"), but it also makes for excellent background in a canvas.

How old am I? Does it matter? Imagination is ageless, inspiration is amaranthine.

I believe as V does: words will always retain power. I think that the best stories are laced with symbolism and themes. The initial action of literature is to engage the mind, while the period at its closing is to impart an ideal to the reader.

Serj Tankian is my lover. System of a Down is my crack.

I worship Holly Black, Celia Rees, and Amelia Atwater-Rhodes.

I worship Amedeo Modigliani, Francis Bacon, and Alphonse Mucha.

One of my literary ambitions (besides to actually finish a story) is to make an original mafia story. I want to make a story that breaks the mold that most mafia stories fall into. Trust me, dear children, it is in the making as we speak.

I'm an avid role player. At the moment I'm involved in two major ones: Crimson Moon and Intoxicated. The plot for Crimson Moon is really complicated, so it's just easier to explain it as a "fantasy-nerd's wet dream". Intoxicated has an easier plot to describe: a corrupt politician is trying to find his way to power, and when he does he will round up the homeless and send them all to jail. In response, the homeless, prostitutes, and druggies have set up an organization of safe houses known as Utopia under their leader, a prostitute nicknamed Clopin. Basically, the homeless see it fit to perform a coup-de-etat.

Hm. I think that this is it for my profile.

Much love and love bites (where the sun don’t shine)

~Ewen “I’m not a Dark Princess, dammit!” Lythrum