My name is Haley. I am hilarious. Can't you tell? I am usually way too busy doing nothing to use Fictionpress anymore, but I keep my account here because, as a general rule, FP is just one big weepy-girl-orgy, so I fit in well. Actually, I take that back. There are also a lot of fanfic teens here who write bubbly, sexually charged fantasy novellas. But yeah, pretty much those are the two sub-cultures. Anime girls with acne, or weepy girls with some kind of contrived dysfunction. I hate women. Well, just immensely dislike them, rather. Oh, or you might be a member of that very slim margin of male users. That means that you are gay. If you are here, male, and did not identify yourself as a homosexual before reading this, don't kill the messenger. You would have realized sooner or later.

Does anyone even use this anymore? Why am I here? Why are you here?