So, you're actually reading this, eh? @_@ How oddly fulfilling. Er, for me. Probably not for you, unless you get off on badly written bios. And if that's the case then...-hides behind the couch-...Just tell me when you're done.

Eh hem.

The name of me, the glorious author whose bio you're reading is Izabela. Now cower. Cower and be amazed at my gloriousness.

And now...for some spiffy facts about yours truly; because it's much more fun that way. :D

My age is of a young and supple 18 year old. However, once I hit March 17th, I'll be starting on the long and winding road to having a saggy butt. x_x Such is life. Feh. -starts saving up money for a butt lifting surgery-

My most loved snacks include Chocolate Mochi and Pocky (-hugs the Japanese-), and I've recently become obsessed with little yummy white chocolate things. :D

As for other foods, I'm quite partial to mac & cheese, mashed potatoes with gravy, and the most beautiful creation known to man: clam chowder. *_* -creates an ocean out of drool- Give my clam chowder and I will love you forever.

And now for the fun stuff:

The man I am most obsessed with right now and want to do naughty, perverse things to is Otis Driftwood from House of 1000 Corpses. Sure, he's insane, kills people, rapes, mutilates the remains, and tortures but...o_o;;....he's still very passionate about his...err...art...e_e

I want an Otis to call my own.

Ahh, I fondly recall having a conversation about Otis with one of my minions (or friends, whatever. @_@). I was sighing and asked, "Oh, where can I get a man like Otis? -double sigh-...Poor, poor me."

To which she replied, "Did you try checking a maximum security prison?"

Huh. Must put that on my list of things to do.

Anyhoo, I will end this bio with a quote from my killer love monkey, Otis. :D 'Cause he's awesome.

a cheerleader screams
Otis: Shut your mouth!
more screams
Otis: I said, shut your fucking mouth!
screams
Otis: Listen, you Malibu middle class Barbie piece of shit, I'm tryin' to work here. Work? You ever work? Yeah, I'll bet you have. Scoopin' ice cream to your shit-heel friends on summer break. Well I ain't talkin' about no goddamn white socks with Mickey Mouse on one side and Donald Duck on the other. I ain't readin' no funny books, mama. Our bodies come and go but this blood... is forever.

-sigh- Isn’t he dreamy?