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The Mumbling Sage
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forums:: My Forums
email: Email
since: 03-08-06, id: 516073, Profile edited: 03-17-08
web: Homepage
Author has written 15 stories for Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Essay, and Historical.

To all people looking for me: I'm not on Fictionpress much anymore, for various reasons.  I'll always answer PMs, and am perfectly willing to review, beta, or add a story to my C2. But don't expect me to take the initiative.

I now have a website! Dragon Wing is a writing forum dedicated to...well, pretty much anything you want to do. Plenty of room for expansion, with an RPG section in the planning.

http://s3.invisionfree.com/Dragon_Wing/

If you're an anonymous reivewer: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave contact information, email address or homepage URL or something, so I can thank you personally and/or discuss the story (and answer questions, if you asked any). Don't worry if the review isn't complimentary so long as it was polite; I only get upset when I can't answer somebody's comments with my own.

Speaking of which, since we aren't allowed to reply to reviews in our stories anymore I'll reply to reviews here:

Hi Matt & Kaitlyn, My Worst Nightmare. Congrats, for you have made me look like a fool. :p But I love you guys anyway :)

Gender: Female. And I hate to break it to you, boys, but I'm not single.

Hair; Brown and shoulder-length

Eyes; brown

Religion: Christian born & baptized, but I'm so open-minded my brain fell out... I'm also interested in Buddaism and any religions I randomly make up for my stories. Feel free to spar with me over my e-mail, it hasn't destroyed any friendships yet.

Updating habits: spasmodic, I think I'm going on once a month now.

Preferreed stories(to read): Entertaining fanstasy or sci fi or anything with a good voice

Preferred stories (to write): Sci-fi/fantasy (I think it's called 'space fantasy') with a dallop of mythology thrown in.

Favored Enemy: People who put library books on the wrong shelf. Or on the wrong space on the wrong shelf. (Yes, people who end questions with periods are forgiven. Or are they.)

Second Favored Enemy: People who chew gum. Will stop before I begin to rant...

Third Favored Enemy: Well, I belong to Anti-Shurtugal. Eragon fans will know what 'Shurtugal' means, and the anti means...well...we hate the Inheiritance triolgy and rip it to shreds, in between pugging and reviewing our own writing. I've acutally learned a lot there. If you wish to say angry things to me because I don't like your favorite story, go ahead. We have a whole thread going of fan quotes =).

Hobbies; I do too little in life to have hobbies. They're all full-time careers. Wikipedia, Runescape (name: Ashvang), NationStates, RPGs (D&D and Vampire: the Masquerade), reading, writing, telling weird jokes, swapping weird jokes, and (as my friends will tell you) engaging in battle with grapefruit trees. And losing.

Birthday: June 8. Send me presents! (Oh, yeah, and astrologically, due to the shift of the planets, I'm a Taurus, not Gemeni. So there.)

Fanfiction: Lady Bitter Irony on Fanfiction.net. The stories 'Hunter' and 'Tomorrow' and that Eragon one whose title I forget are mine, the other two are Bitter Irony's. We shared the account way back when.

Job: Libary Page. It's awesome.

I really appriciate all reviews, particularily constructive criticism. If I'm doing something wrong and it bothers you, tell me so I can fix it! If I'm doing something wrong and it doesn't bother you, it bothers someone else so tell me! If I'm doing something right and it bothers you, don't suffer in silence! Tell me!I will try to reply to all reviews, so any anonymous reviewers please leave your e-mails if you want me to get back to you.

http://www.larseighner.com/world_builder/urban_worldbuilder.html
This site has great worldbuilder questions!

http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9B0DE7DC163BF936A25751C1A961948260&sec=health&pagewanted=2Ever read a scientific article and then realized that they’re describing you? If you’re one of these people, I want to hear from you! (Yay! I’m Fantasy Prone, but that’s not as dirty as it sounds).

Mumbling Sage's books you must read:

Nightmare, by Steve Harper (and anything else by him)

When True Night Falls (acutally, the entire Coldfire Trilogy), by C.S. Friedman

Halfway Human, by Carolyn Ives Gilman (buy it for re-reading purposes)

Boarders of Infinity, by Lois McMaster Bujold (and anything else by her)

Eldest, by Christopher Paolini (as a what-not-to-do kind of book. Please don't buy it.)

Sacajawea, by Anna Lee Waldo (again, as a what-not-to-do. After reading each passage I think to myself how it could have been written different, and better. This thing was a bestseller for nine months. The author does not deserve any more money. DO NOT buy it!)

Rants done. There, that's my advice to live a complete life. If you've read this far, you're already halfway there.




1. Spirit Lake » reviews
It seemed like a routine, if mystical, errand. Even if it did have strange company. But after this, nothing can be the same...for anyone. From the same setting as Heir to Life, though not a sequel.
Fantasy - Fiction Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 26,073 - Reviews: 85 - Updated: 1-20-08 - Published: 5-11-07
2. Parody: A Working Definition reviews
Provided as a public service to all those reading the essay section who wish to avoid making fools of themselves! If you aren't sure what a parody is, or have every found yourself shaking your head and saying 'This CAN'T be real', come on in and see it is
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 379 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 11-22-07 - Published: 11-22-07
3. The StepByStep Guide to Writing Epic Fantasy » reviews
I've seen too many stories begin the same way. It makes me wonder if there's a guide out there, and if so, what it would read like...A series of observations on the genre that have probably been made before, but never by yours truly! Check it out!
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,428 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 11-8-07 - Published: 10-28-07
4. Burning You Way Through the Library reviews
A helpful, informative guide of what to scorch first, and why. Perfect for whenever you're stuck in a library and need some heat or light! Also known as 'what happens when the library pages get rebellious'
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,303 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 10-21-07 - Published: 10-21-07
5. The Subtle Strife reviews
A discussion read: rant of subtlety and the lack thereof in your average Fictionpress story. I'd say more, but I don't want to clobber you over the head with it.
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,173 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 9-21-07 - Published: 9-21-07
6. Guide to Things a Fantasy Author should Never Do reviews
After much painful research, I have brought you a master list of 23 things that will never work in your writing. Ever. Ouch!Sorry, I sort of choked on the tounge in my cheek.
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - Parody/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,988 - Reviews: 25 - Updated: 7-10-07 - Published: 7-10-07
7. The Feng Shui of Review » reviews
An entire essay dedicated to that FictionPress staple, the review. Everyone who reviews gets a special treat!
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,952 - Reviews: 34 - Updated: 5-16-07 - Published: 2-15-07
8. Knight of the Unicorn » reviews
The world may end tomorrow, but yesterday still happened. The fates of Earth and the planet Aracia are entwined at the end of all worlds. Set in the same universe as Aqua Vitae
Sci-Fi - Fiction Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Spiritual - Chapters: 15 - Words: 54,589 - Reviews: 33 - Updated: 4-22-07 - Published: 5-2-06
9. The Heir of Life » reviews
Perera the storyteller has disappeared, leaving a young ward behind. Now Renner must discover not only the whereabouts of his mentor but also the truth about himself. I am returning reviews on this story
Complete - Fantasy - Fiction Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 13,747 - Reviews: 60 - Updated: 4-1-07 - Published: 1-3-07
10. How to Write a Fictionpress Summary reviews
In this essay, I explain how a summary can me made to draw in the most attention with the most information about your story.Fact: Each summary can contain up to 255 characters!
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 636 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 3-29-07 - Published: 3-29-07
11. Selling My Soul Using DECA reviews
I'm selling my soul using the DECA retail merchandising associate level performance indicators! Watch me DEMONstrate my product. But I have a very limited target market...
Complete - Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 653 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 12-20-06 - Published: 12-20-06
12. A Long Night reviews
In World War II a chaplain's assistant in the South Pacific awaits a telegram bearing the Catholic Church's answer to a contraversal topic. This is a true story.
Complete - Historical - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,296 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 12-6-06 - Published: 12-6-06
13. Fortune Cookie reviews
Oneshot. Celestia Munroe recieves a big eyeopener when she has a date with a Requian at a Chinese restaurant.
Complete - Sci-Fi - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,475 - Reviews: 9 - Updated: 10-18-06 - Published: 10-18-06
14. Description: The hows, whens, and whys reviews
Some thoughts on description in fiction and how to handle it.
Essay - Fiction Rated: K - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,749 - Reviews: 12 - Updated: 5-16-06 - Published: 5-16-06
15. Aqua Vitae » reviews
One woman's quest for immortality drives her across the world, then the universe. Will it drive her over the edge?
Sci-Fi - Fiction Rated: T - English - Drama/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 17,538 - Reviews: 24 - Updated: 4-17-06 - Published: 3-22-06
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